Mumsnet Talk

doughnut when he was teething he did have messy poos so I didnt think too much about it, but he doesnt have them any more really and its never a problem when he is at home or when he is with my mum.

My childminder barely has time to respond to texts, let alone be on twitter all day! Please don't beat yourself up about this and don't let your DH talk you out of changing. Mistakes happen, we can never predict what people will be like. She is caring for the most precious thing in your life. If you can't trust her on a simple thing like nappy changing, bigger issues are likely to follow.
I am sure your son will settle in a different environment just as easily. Good luck

I am a CM and I have a child who is sent home with poo on his vest almost daily - not down to my nappy changing - just the childs poo. I change nappies as and when needed, before playgroups, before leaving playgroup, after lunch/before nap, and around 4pm.
I don't do twitter but if the children are asleep I will go on facebook or check my messages. I refuse to get an ipod type phone as it's too tempting to check things. As for eleanorrubysmummys comment about kids needing mums - I can't begin to tell you how many mums are at playgroups and even music sessions where they are supposed to interact with their children, that are faffing about on their blooming phones.
You are obviously not happy with your cm so I would recommend you change asap.

Your poor ds he obv isn't being changed enough and being in same nappy for 4.5hrs when has nappy rash is

Regards twitter / I'm not on it but sure she can pop a quick tweet on it - just like us nannies and cm may reply on here while working

Either way you are not happy with the care so yes move ds. He will be fine and bond with his new Carer

In her defence I will say there is a boy I nanny for every now and again and he has a very healthy diet (tons of fruit and veg)and poos regularly and when teething he literally gets a very sore bum within minutes and I've been known to change a few times an hour and still sore

I change my own kids every 3 hours and I am quite lax. I would be worried about the twitter addiction. My kids have enough benign neglect while I -- mn-- clean without the carers I pay to look after them ignoring them in favour of their phone.

If a parent asked me to change a sore child regularly due to nappy rash, I would do exactly as they asked.

How would dh feel if ds were to deveolp an infection due to nappy rash?? Or if he were to fall & hurt himself whilst cm was Twittering????? crikey, that's why kids need Mums!!! I'm sure he would be fine but trust your gut.....if you're worried now, it'll increase.

Move him. I wouldnt leave mine there, how awful for him/.

I pulled my eldest out of nursery on the spot, because I heard one of the nursery nurses shouting at the children, and she wasnt even shouting at mine.

don't worry about moving him, young children are very adaptable. i have had children of mine go to other cms when i have gone on maternity leave twice, and they have all settled really well within days. i have also taken on other cms children for similiar reasons and again,it's been fine.
don't beat yourself up about it. you can not leave him there now, not knowing what you know. take comfort in that he is secure and has been happy there, if he has settled once, he will do so again. but she is being very neglectful and that is a real worry.

I worried changing my little one at 18mths when he had been with cm for 9mths but actually what I did was increase nursery to 2 days and took husband and I took 3weeks worth of the other 2 days off as annual leave to settle him with new minder before he started properly and yeah he cried first 2 days (he does split week as only days she had) and settled quickly now 10mths on he prefers cm to nursery in fact last 2 days has said no nursery go "x" so he will be pleased tommorow is a cm day

exactly eleanorrubysmum I don't think he will mind terribly but dh is worried,however I feel leaving him there is not giving him the best we can which he deserves.

You say ds is happy with the cm...but don't most young children settle swiftly with ne wpeople?? Our dd had to change cm suddenly & settled within a couple of days (whilst I had a nervous breakdown due to guilt!) I fully understand what you are saying, but seriously, Twitter vs childcare??? Hmmm, perhaps cm needs to re-think her career choice!

reet she used to work with a girl in our dept, long story short, they follow each other she raised concern I checked.
He is happy there, they go out most mornings but still a lot of tweeting.....

at home i only change my son morning lunch and bedtime unless he poos he wears pampers and doesnt get that wet. Childminder does 3 changes a day in 9hr day more if needed. Nursery change every few hrs so for both I send sainsburys or aldi nappies as changed so often.

I would move him as all trust has gone and I would inform her you will be reporting to ofsted her lack of care to your child -take a photo of his bottom and also keep daily diary as evidence.

is your ds happy at the cms? what does his daily diary say - does she got out or is she on twitter all day? i'm so shocked by that - how did you find out?

I know natasha that is what scares me. was going to move him to nursery when he was three but may move him now save him more upheaval in the long run. there is a lovely nursery near here. I just feel I'm lumbered because ds loves her so dh doesn't want to rock the boat, so I'm stuck. I made a crap choice and ds has tossuffer. I feel like I've let him down so much.

DS's nursery changes nappies every 2 hours, or more if dirty. I know from the rate that they go through his nappies at, that they do actually do the changes they claim to. I can't imagine how sore he'd be if he was left all day in a dirty nappy. I would definitely move him, although i'd make sure i had a new minder lined up before giving notice to the old one. For all you know while she's posting on twitter, he could be playing with the oven or something far worse than a dirty nappy.

i haven't seen your other thread, but omg, that is terrible!! she is very,very neglectful. 4.5 hrs is too long imo even without a nappy rash - you have asked her to change him regularly and she still hasn't - she can't even make an effort for one day! And being on twitter all day is terrible. you should move your ds asap. You are not overeacting. you and your ds deserve better than that. there are many wonderful,hardworking childminders out there.sadly for you, you have a bad one there.

thanks lala dh thinks I'm overreacting but I don't see how we can continue to leave him with someone who has broken my trust.

I would move you DS as soon as possible. A nappy rash with the severity you describe is not on in my opinion. Not changing him as you requested and 4.5 hrs later is absolutely unacceptable. I would also consider letting ofsted know!

well, home from cm with a pooey vest again and despite my asking her to change him every couple of hours, his first change was 4 and a half hours after I dropped him off (daily diary).
but have also since discovered that she is probably too busy to change him often asshe is far busier on twitter all day. (I know I started a thread about that on chat earlier but I'm past caring about outing myself now. I feel furious. have seriously considered moving him but dh not keen, apparently he doesn't think it's a big deal that he is being cared for by someone who would rather tweet random celebs than change his bum.

I would be annoyed at that. At DS's nursery they manage to do nappies a minimum of 3x a day and more when needed. They seem to be pretty quick on the uptake (it was hilarious one day at pick up watching them try to locate a rogue stinker...)

could it be her using different wipes as to why he is sore? just my dd gets very sore very quick if use anything other than the huggies pure wipes?

Changing a nappy is very basic care and I do wonder what else she might be neglecting to do.

she is being lazy then. if she is using your nappies and wipes, she is just not bothering to change him. ask her to keep a diary and let her know you are on to her. she might start to buck her ideas up, if not, i would find someone else to be honest (sorry,probably not want you want to hear i know)