Note: Please bear in mind that this is a discussion board, not a place to advertise childcare vacancies or recruit childminders/nannies etc. We don't mind the odd mumsnet regular mentioning that they're looking for a job/mindee (although you're probably better off in MN Local) but repeated job "ads" and posts from nanny/babysitting agencies aren't fair to people who are paying for small business ads. Do feel free to report any you see. Thanks, MNHQ.

If you heard a childs parent say

(35 Posts)
DoISay Fri 23-Nov-12 09:14:50

something upsetting to the child.

Context

Child "I hate you"
Parent "Well if you hate me then I wont be here when you finish school"

Parent later jokes about it to me and says maybe it'll teach child a lesson as they are actually going away for the weekend and the child doesn't know.

sad

Would you tell the parent (one of your parents) that it was unacceptable or just deal with the tears and upset later on from the child and not say a word?

Blondeshavemorefun Fri 23-Nov-12 11:54:47

That horrible and so sad sad

Why wouldn't you tell a child you are going away for the weekend ??'

DoISay Fri 23-Nov-12 12:10:47

Blondes we've spoken about this family before sad

There is only mum so no-one else to speak to. Will have to schedule a chat next week.

fraktion Fri 23-Nov-12 13:27:49

I think you really do need to schedule a chat. This is the kind of situation that breaks my heart sad

Adults can be so cruel to children without realising it. They think it's a joke but don't comprehend that the child simply doesn't understand, and this is a particularly vicious example.

Does this happen a lot? It's emotional abuse and I think you should be noting down your concerns and raising it with the relevant authorities if yo you see a worrying pattern.

RyleDup Fri 23-Nov-12 13:32:00

Fuck. That is really nasty. What a cow. I'd have to say something, politely of course. You couldn't not really.

Blondeshavemorefun Fri 23-Nov-12 13:45:36

Oh sad that family sad

DoISay Fri 23-Nov-12 14:36:33

So.. how?

She often asks me if his behaviour is to do with her? Could follow on from there.... have other "issues" around the same theme, do I go in for the onslaught hmm I hate this part of the job.

DumSpiroSpero Fri 23-Nov-12 14:49:24

What sort of behaviour are we talking about?

It does sound as if there is a real issue here in their relationship.

DoISay Fri 23-Nov-12 15:00:28

General 4 year old stuff. But he is generally silly/naughty for her and then we have big tantrums but again nothing a bit of consistency wouldn't solve.

CharlieCoCo Sun 25-Nov-12 19:07:50

Thats awful. What if something happens like a car crash and god forbid the parent dies, that child will be even more messed up thinking it happened because she said i hate you.

DumSpiroSpero Sun 25-Nov-12 20:20:41

It sounds like he's desperate for her attention/approval.

If she can't already see that and is saying this sort of thing I'm not how or if you'll be able to get through to her tbh.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now