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parents always late

(69 Posts)
calmlychaotic Tue 06-Nov-12 23:51:16

i don't really want to charge late fees, i mind for friends or friends of friends and if i charge some would have to charge all. i do feel they take advantage though because they are friends. 20 mins late as norm, often no apology. my other problem is parents hanging around for ages when collecting. i expect them to want to chat about the day and how the child's been but 45 mins, parent are chatting to other parents while im trying to cleanup! i know i need to be tougher, its a lovely atmosphere at pick up kids are happy, parents are happy and i don't want to ruin it but i do need my own life too! i have let it go so long i can't suddenly start charging. any advice how to do this nicely.

mumnosbest Tue 06-Nov-12 23:54:46

can you say you're updating all contracts. ask them if they need to make any changes and suggest they need to change their hours.

Could you "start" a new activity that requires you to be out of the house 15 mins after pick up?

GrimAndHumourless Tue 06-Nov-12 23:59:35

you need to be assertive and professional; this is where minding for friends can be difficult

give notice that you are going to start charging late fees, say from 1st December, and set the fees quite high

lead the parents to the door at pick up, usher them out, and shut them out; this takes a bit of skill to do discreetly. feel free to say 'I must get on, bu-bye' if they don't take the hint

if in the early years group, refer the parents to your arse their diary, a few quick sentences 'a great day little Jonny, lots of detail in the diary' smile and swish them out

SminkoPinko Wed 07-Nov-12 00:03:18

Start charging. Honestly, it works wonders! My nursery charges astronomical late fees and no one is ever late. Give letters to all parents to announce the change. re the chatting- can you politely but firmly shepherd them to the door?!

SminkoPinko Wed 07-Nov-12 00:03:58

x post with grim!

calmlychaotic Wed 07-Nov-12 00:12:51

love the suggestions, i know i am so lame! i like the activity idea, must dash off for a run, all info is in diary, brilliant! also got several breastfed and they stay to feed. no problem with it other than they take ages! how do i hurry them?

GrimAndHumourless Wed 07-Nov-12 00:29:12

you need to open the door and gesture them out

I know it seems harsh but they can chat on doorstep outside between themselves, you shut door and pop on kettle

I wouldn't invent activities because sure as eggs is eggs you'd get Found Out, but there's nowt wrong with saying ''chop chop, I need to get to tesco, here we go'', and step out with them, lock up and zoom off. every night til the penny drops, yes?

we are not thinking you are lame, or sappy, most of us have Been There and Done That, experience is key

minderjinx Wed 07-Nov-12 11:54:32

Definitely not fair to you to expect to stay to breastfeed or chat after hours. I would offer a contract review and remind parents that the finishing time needs to be the time they leave, not when they arrive give or take ten minutes. Presumably that is what your attendance register will show and you can show them in the nicest possible way that they need to add half an hour onto their contracted time each day or get to you much earlier. I'd also introduce hefty late fees, perhaps sugaring the pill by saying that you are not proposing to increase normal charges in the current climate but that you are introducing substantial late charges as your ACTUAL hourly income is getting lower due to so many late pickups.

ZuleikaD Wed 07-Nov-12 12:17:21

Blimey I wouldn't let them stick around to breastfeed! Not unless I was charging them for the hours, anyway. I think the suggestion of letting everyone know that you're going to be updating the contracts is a sound one - take note for a week of when parents actually leave and suggest that as you've noticed they don't take the children until X time then your contracted hours should be extended until then. But you MUST GET TOUGH!

ChippingInLovesAutumn Wed 07-Nov-12 12:23:31

Friends and friends of friends - it's not the same as 'regular' client is it...

I think you should just be honest with them and say something like 'Look, it's lovely to chat every night, but I'm just finding that I can't get our dinner on the table/the kids homework done/the shopping done/house sorted (whatever) and that you really need an empty house by x o'clock. Say that it wouldn't even be so bad if it was only one set of friends etc, but with everyone staying to chit-chat it's chaos smile !!

Then maybe organise an actual social event so it doesn't look like you don't want to still be friends with them?! <<< that does NOT have to be at your house!

lechatnoir Wed 07-Nov-12 12:27:33

Best advice I was given is explain you have been advised that you are not insured for free childcare so unfortunately you will either need to amend contracted hours or start charging late fees.

Blondeshavemorefun Wed 07-Nov-12 14:13:13

be tough grin

start charging hefty late feees and they will stop

love the not insured reply, prob is true and you can always say that a friend who is a cm got inspected and this came up and if a child fell over and hurt his self after their contracted hours then you wont be covered

people stay and breast feed? shock

shoo them out firmly and say you need to start bath/homework(if older ones) tea etc

mindingalongtime Wed 07-Nov-12 16:44:24

Say, I think it is time to review our contracts as the hours seem to be extending beyond what is agreed, and that over a wek it equals x amount, I did this and it stopped immediately when faced with an extras bill of £70 a month!

Also at interview I also said that the finish time on the contract is the time they leave my house, not the time they arrive, so if we need an extra 15 mins for handover, lets write it in now!

ZuleikaD Wed 07-Nov-12 17:09:10

I don't actually let parents into the house; I meet them on the doorstep with their coated, shod and hatted child, hand over the child's bag and say goodnight!

Friends I mind for get 15 minutes (stretched to 20 now she's pregnant) and then a big smile and told 'as much as I love you I need a lovely cup of tea so we'll see you on x day to play again. I'll text you to arrange coffee, bye now' Had to start doing that after she stayed until 6:30 because her DH was out and the girls love to play together!

Be firm, tell them that you are knackered at the end of the day and you are sure they want to spend lovely time with the kids themselves. Oh and put a stop to the feeding, that is taking the proverbial.

sunnyshine Wed 07-Nov-12 17:27:51

Me too, on the doorstep front room door shut. Everything is done in hallway!! It's my time!!!

bubblepops Wed 07-Nov-12 17:38:07

Yep, don't get past the hallway, I chat but if they don't start I will start putting coats on the babies lol!!

readysteady Wed 07-Nov-12 18:18:20

Sorry I feel a bit sorry for the mum wanting to breast feed (but only if she is doing so within the allocated time and if not if she is very apologetic about being late) I remember being desperate to feed when I picked mine up. And so was the baby.

SamSmalaidh Wed 07-Nov-12 18:22:37

If they want to stay and breastfeed though they need to get there 15-20 minutes before closing time.

Blondeshavemorefun Wed 07-Nov-12 18:23:17

Zule - I like your style smile

And mums can bf in their car

Welovecouscous Wed 07-Nov-12 18:23:55

You sound like the kind of cm I would love. smile I'm one of those late, bf mums grin

After 30 mins I would just say 'ooh, look at the time, must get dinner on'.

expatinscotland Wed 07-Nov-12 18:27:15

Meet them at the door. YY, not insured beyond contracted hours.

expatinscotland Wed 07-Nov-12 18:28:06

30 minutes? And you're doing your CM a favour by hanging round to feed your child?

You need to get tough, OP, that is 30 minutes of your time.

Leafmould Wed 07-Nov-12 18:28:53

As a parent, I would have liked it if my cm had had me wait at the doorstep. It was a nightmare dragging them away from their activity and getting them ready!

Much as I did like to talk to her, and I do think it was good that we always had good communication.

I was charged up to the nearest 15 min that we were in her house, so I had some motivation to be on time. She did not do late fees. I got stung recently at the out of school club who do do late fees, and it has got me running to be on time!

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