Do fathers have a legal right to be at the birth?

(86 Posts)
Mummy2014 Sun 05-Jan-14 22:14:45

Just above really.

My ex left me at 7 months, but still wants to be involved with the baby. My due date is Wednesday & I have always said his actions between him leaving & when I go into labour would determine whether he was at the birth or not. Well, he's been very hot & cold with me, supportive 1 minute, ignoring my messages the next.
At present I don't feel like I want him at the birth, but when I said this to him he said I have no right to not allow him, and by doing that I am refusing to let him see his child. Which I am not!
My feelings after the birth do not matter, it's what's best for our child & I have always wanted them to have contact & a stong relationship!

He has been threatening to take me to court etc if he is not allowed at the birth, Would / could this go against me if it gets that far?

Sorry for the rant / long winded message


Flambards Sun 05-Jan-14 22:17:06

He has absolutely categorically no right whatsoever to be at the birth. End of.

AnyaKnowIt Sun 05-Jan-14 22:17:20

In a word no he has no right to be at the birth.

PinkandGreenStripes Sun 05-Jan-14 22:17:48

He has no right to be at the birth. YOU choose the person who can offer the best support.

NotAnotherPackedLunchBox Sun 05-Jan-14 22:18:55

No right at all.
Childbirth isn't a spectator sport. The only people that should be there are those that will be supportive to the labouring woman.

stargirl1701 Sun 05-Jan-14 22:19:03


Rufustherednosedreindeer Sun 05-Jan-14 22:19:08

Agree with all the others

He has no right to be at the birth

Kendodd Sun 05-Jan-14 22:19:12

Tell him you'll "see him in court then" or "fuck off" both work for me.

17leftfeet Sun 05-Jan-14 22:19:44

He has no right whatsoever and the hospital will 'police' this for you so he can't see you

AuntieStella Sun 05-Jan-14 22:19:48

No. You cannot be compelled to have anyone at your delivery.

Hospital wards are usually extremly good at preventing access by anyone the labouring mother has no explicitly approved.

HaroldTheGoat Sun 05-Jan-14 22:20:47

No right at all.

It's your decision, your not stopping him having a relationship with your child if you say no.

Take someone who will support you. thanks

He has no right to be there and the midwives won't let him in if you tell them not to.

Kittensmctavish Sun 05-Jan-14 22:21:41

Depending on the circs you may want to think very carefully about whether he is named on the birth certificate too. If he is then he will get parental responsibility and have the same rights as you to make decisions about the child in the future. Please take advice on this if you haven't already as it can have far reaching consequences.

All the best.

Casmama Sun 05-Jan-14 22:23:05

Absolutely not. Do not let him bully you.
Possibly worth telling your midwife when you get to hospital that you don't want him allowed entry if there is any chance he could find out you are in labour.

Casmama Sun 05-Jan-14 22:24:07

Sorry multiple xposts.

petalsandstars Sun 05-Jan-14 22:24:55

Agree with pp - birth partner ia there to support you. Not a spectator sport.

PinkandGreenStripes Sun 05-Jan-14 22:26:12

I agree. Think carefully about the birth certificate. He sounds like one of those twunts that will demand his "rights" as a father by making you miserable.

I saw a thread on this very subject a few years ago, in which some fabulous MNer gave some wonderful advice which I now repeat, more or less verbatim:

"If you don't want him there, tell the midwives, who will muscle him to the far side of fuck if he tries to force his way in".

Good luck- I hope all goes well. thanks

Skrifa Sun 05-Jan-14 22:27:50

No right whatsoever.

Mummy2014 Sun 05-Jan-14 22:29:43

Thank you all, that is what I had thought but the stupid arse has it in his head that it's his right & I'm in the wrong for not allowing it.
Kendodd - hahaha, the latter works for me, but unfortunately I have tried to remain calm & dignified & refuse to let him see / know he is winding me up.


ChasedByBees Sun 05-Jan-14 22:29:43

Not allowing him at the birth will have no bearing on any future court actions about your DC. Why would any woman want the man who has left her while she's heavily pregnant there at such a private vulnerable time? Don't let him in. He could suppress the positive hormones you need for labour. It could actually cause delays in the labour.

fedup21 Sun 05-Jan-14 22:31:02

God-he sounds like the last person you'd want at the birth; what an arse! Don't tell him when you've gone into labour!

fedup21 Sun 05-Jan-14 22:32:37

I'd tell him that as well-why would I want someone who left me to be at the birth when I am feeling vulnerable?! You want to remember this as a happy time!!

Mummy2014 Sun 05-Jan-14 22:36:56

I have said that to him, I will be at my most vulnerable & I need to be supported, I don't think he can do that - his reply (wait for it!!!)
We put our differences aside for the birth, get that out the way, then afterwards we hardly have to see each other :-O
What a c**t!!!

TalkativeJim Sun 05-Jan-14 22:37:09

No right whatsoever, and more to the point - it sounds as if he's the last person in the world you should choose to be there.

This IS about you. It is absolutely not a good idea to have ANYONE you do not feel 100% comfortable with, and supported by, in the room when you are labouring. Feeling stressed and unhappy is NOT conducive to labour progressing quickly and safely. Yes, it DOES make a difference- sometimes a massive one.

How would you feel if you consented to him being there and ended up with a stalled labour and a CS after not being physically able to relax and 'go with' your labour because he was there ?

It's SO personal. Nobody should EVER be at a labour to 'watch'. The thought is obscene.

Tell him that you would never risk the safe delivery of your child by placing its labouring mother in a stressful environment which may well prevent labour progressing as it should.

And don't put bully-boy on the birth cert.

JugglingIntoANewYear Sun 05-Jan-14 22:40:28

Yes, I wouldn't recommend having him there, and it's absolutely your choice.
I think however well you got on with an ex you generally wouldn't want them at the birth?
Possibly, depending on good behaviour, let them know of safe arrival soon afterwards and they can come for a quick visit at a more appropriate time.
Best of luck to you for the birth?
Anyone you would like/find helpful to support you ?

Mummy2014 Sun 05-Jan-14 22:40:59

Thank you Talkative, I shall be using some of your post to email to him & hope he at least understands things from my point of view xx

fedup21 Sun 05-Jan-14 22:41:30

Also-what if you ended up upset and unable to speak for yourself, leaving him to make important decisions for you and the baby. Or if he got to hold the baby before you sad

JugglingIntoANewYear Sun 05-Jan-14 22:41:55

Sorry, stray ? - have some thanks instead smile

fedup21 Sun 05-Jan-14 22:42:07

I wouldn't even have a conversation about it. Don't tell him when you're in labour.

Mummy2014 Sun 05-Jan-14 22:44:05

The other part of me is considering not telling him when I go into labour, by all means visit as soon as baby is born but don't tell him. Silly me though, feels bad for him not knowing :-/ I'm being too nice & easy on him!!

SinisterSal Sun 05-Jan-14 22:45:18

I'm gobsmacked at the cheek of the fucker!

PinkandGreenStripes Sun 05-Jan-14 22:45:39

Don't email him. Don't engage. He will bully you. He won't see things in your view. If he did, you wouldn't need this thread.

If you feel like it, text him AFTER you have had your baby.

Good luck. thanks

Mummy2014 Sun 05-Jan-14 22:46:05

I know sinister, I know!!! This isn't even the half of it lol!! X

ilovesmurfs Sun 05-Jan-14 22:47:57

Absolutly no right to be at the birth.

My friedns ex tried to pull this, he lefther when she was three months pregnant, we didnt even tell him when she wemt into labour, I was her birth partner.

After the birth I called to let him know baby had arrived, sex, weight and name etc and told him she would be in touch when she was ready for visitors.

Hospital knew not to let him onto the ward if he tried to visit.

JugglingIntoANewYear Sun 05-Jan-14 22:48:09

I think that's a great idea Mummy2014 - just call him sometime afterwards.
And don't feel bad about it at all, you've enough to think about without worrying about him x

starlight1234 Sun 05-Jan-14 22:49:05

Been in labour is about you and safe arrival...I would talk to midwives, and not tell him a thing up until Lo's arrival...It will be far less stressful for will have enough to think about...

My ExH ( who wasn't Ex at time) was at birth and couldn't figure out it wasn't about him ..It didn't help anything me having to calm him down..

I also advise about telling anyone who is likely to tell him..

good luck for the birth...

lunar1 Sun 05-Jan-14 22:49:55

Do not let this man bully you, he has no right to be at the birth.

TheDoctrineOf2014 Sun 05-Jan-14 22:51:09

You are the patient.

He is a total cock.

JabberJabberJay Sun 05-Jan-14 22:52:44

Don't feel bad for him. This is about you not him.

If you must talk about it again, firmly tell him he will not be at the birth.

Though actually, I would refuse to discuss it any further and absolutely not tell him when you're in labour. He can visit after the baby is born and when you are ready.

He has no rights at all here. This has nothing to do with access arrangements for your baby. There is no way in hell this would get to court. He's showing a ludicrous ignorance of how the law works.

I'd think very carefully about naming this man on the birth certificate.

Longdistance Sun 05-Jan-14 22:53:36

Write on your birth plan that you do not want him there present at the birth.

Also, don't contact him, if and when you're in labour, and then only tell him after the event.

IdaClair Sun 05-Jan-14 22:54:47

I wish had locked my front door in labour so I could only let the people I wanted in but you live and learn. None has a right to be in your house without your permission and I am sure there are similar systems in hospital although much more public there. It's your choice not his.

basgetti Sun 05-Jan-14 22:57:03

Do not tell him when you are in labour. The fact that he is willing to put you under this stress so close to your due date and is making it all about his 'rights' tells you that this is not the person to support you when you are giving birth. Good luck x

TheDoctrineOf2014 Sun 05-Jan-14 23:00:24

If you aren't married, you can't name him on the birth very without him being at the registrar's too. But not naming him doesn't mean he won't get parental responsibility, just means he has to apply for it.

Will he be paying child support? Have you been in touch with the CSA?

Shellywelly1973 Sun 05-Jan-14 23:58:30

Does your ex have any idea of what a labour and delivery are like?

The labour & birth are all about you!

Once the baby arrives, it's about the baby. Organise support for yourself & take care.

hazchem Mon 06-Jan-14 05:13:16

No he has no right to be at the birth. Nobody has this right.

I'd put a clear indication on your birht notes that he is not to be admitted. EG " DO not allow Mr Blah Blah to enter the delivery room. Do not ask me during labour if he is allowed to enter"

But the simplest way would to not tell him you are in labour. I wouldn't announce the start of labour in anyway either so no facebook ect. Birthing requires focus, support and trust. Having some abusive dick hanging around will make it harder.

fedup21 Mon 06-Jan-14 07:08:50

Does he work or live over the road? Unless he does and sees you rushed to hospital, how would he know you were in labour unless you told him?

mayhew Mon 06-Jan-14 08:21:33

As midwives, we are well aware of scenarios where certain people are excluded from visiting. There is no reason to allow a person onto the ward unless it is at the specific request of the mother. No one has a "right" to visit!

Sometimes there are threats and injunctions involved and we have to protect other patients and staff as well as the woman and her baby.

At my unit, the senior midwife on labour ward can make sure that a woman's admission is on a need-to-know basis only ie does not appear on general lists etc.

The woman is asked to clearly identify who is allowed in and security only allows those people in. She is asked to tell her visitors to be discreet. No texting news, no face book.When they present, a call is made to the ward to double check before they are allowed in.

Mummy2014 Mon 06-Jan-14 08:47:21

Thank you all for your advice.

We had discussed his payment arrangements, but I doubt he will stick to them so going to go straight to CSA & get something in place.

I'm lucky that my family are so supportive & only round the corner, and are wiling to help & be on call should I need them. This is meant to be the happiest time of my life & he is ruining it for me sad xx

captainmummy Mon 06-Jan-14 08:56:26

He thinks he has the 'right' to 'access' to your child before during and after birth? Hahahaha grin - let him go to court!

If you are due wednesday (that's my birthday too!!!!) I doubt very much he'd get anything in place in time - even if he could find a court in the land/universe willing to do such a thing! grin

I hope he goes to a solicitor today, brimming with confidence about his rights, and then gets laughed out of the place!

OP, so glad you have a supportive family on hand.

WTFlike Mon 06-Jan-14 09:16:04

You said My feelings after the birth do not matter.

They do, you know! Lots.

Best of luck. smile

Mummy2014 Mon 06-Jan-14 10:06:11

Thank you all.

I just want to put my feelings aside for the sake of my baby, whilst I dislike this "sperm donor" I don't want my feelings to affect the relationship he has with the baby.

He's now talking over night access, having baby on his own for a few hours, not a chance! He needs to lean how to care for baby first! ! I'm going to try breastfeeding, even though this is my first I know I could potentially be feeding every hour & he doesn't get it! Pfffft! xx

marthabear Mon 06-Jan-14 19:38:31

Agree with all the others. He is bullying you. He has no rights at all when it comes to being at the birth. Choose someone you feel comfortable and safe with. Mind and body are so linked that having such a negative presence at the birth would not be wise. I agree with all the birth certificate comments too. Be as kind to yourself as you can during the rest of your pregnancy.

marthabear Mon 06-Jan-14 19:40:42

Sounds like you need to distance yourself from him and deal with sensible contact at some point in the future. Oh , and the 'Food of Love' book to prepare for breastfeeding is fab by the way !

NatashaBee Mon 06-Jan-14 19:44:14

I would just ignore him for now. Set up a separate folder in your inbox and have all emails divert straight into there so you only need to read them when you're ready. Explain to your midwife and make sure it's written clearly on your birth plan that he's not allowed to attend. And then don't give him any more head space.

1974rach Tue 07-Jan-14 12:39:56

What a dick!

Tell him to do one. And as for having the baby on his own ...yeah right whatever...he is deluded. Would happily pop round and smack him in the chops for you, just say the word lovey.

Mummy2014 Tue 07-Jan-14 23:33:15

Well the delightful tw*t decided to tell me tonight, the night before my due date that he has a new girlfriend!!

As if!!

So if I was in 2 minds about him bein at the birth, he has settled it for me - he is most definately not being there & I am not even tellin him when I'm in labour!

What a complete & utter toss pot ! (Some much stronger words have been used this evening lol!)


TheDoctrineOf2014 Tue 07-Jan-14 23:37:17


He's a cock isn't he? Please don't have him with you. He won't help. Do you have someone supportive and calm to be with you instead?

Mummy2014 Wed 08-Jan-14 05:06:00

I'm so so lucky that I have my families full support & they all live really close, so it will either be my mum or my sister.

Never ever thought my life would end up like his sad

But.......must stay strong. Happy due date to me & baby smile xx

Yes- happy due date! thanks cake brew

lunar1 Wed 08-Jan-14 08:49:34

Happy due date mummy!

Glad to are resolved to not letting him in. I will probably be flamed for this but with all the games he is playing, saying he has a girlfriend when you are at your due date I wouldn't put him on the birth certificate.

It sounds like he would be one to start trying to play happy families with your baby and some poor random woman he drags into all this. If he settles down after the baby arrives and proves to have his child's interests at heart you can always sort out his PR when your child is a little older.

Good luck, hope you are not kept waiting too long!

1974rach Wed 08-Jan-14 08:56:08

Your life is about to change lovey and it will be amazing. Your little one is going to bring you so much joy.

I understand that you want your ex to be a dad but for now concentrate on you. Draw strength from those around you and do not let yourself be bullied.

He is, biologically, a father but proving that he has the emotional capability to be a father to your child is quite another matter.

I would agree with pp that you should speak to a solicitor, but for now rest up and get ready for your little one.

Happy Due Dategrin grin grin


Lioninthesun Wed 08-Jan-14 09:01:36

Morning OP. I let my ex in for the birth as he kept going on about it and how important it was to him and a lifetime memory to treasure, etc ec then he disappeared and got a new g.f when DD was mo and I am torn as to whether it was a good idea or not.
He was a complete pain throughout my 3 day labour; from boring the midwives silly in my kitchen, to talking about missing children, stealing my gas and air, generally acting bored and tired and grumpy and then, when we were transferred to hospital he turned up raging that the MW's had forgotten him (somehow my fault) and he had had to pay £50 for a went on and on. Luckily I managed to laugh at/with him and didn't get angry, but I strongly suspect that was down to my lovely doula who was giving me the giggles with her 'looks' wink. I think the C-section freaked him out considerably (he was ex army and it still surprises me at how green and flappy he went during it) and he felt pretty powerless (complications) but I do believe he will never forget holding DD for the first time. I have to hope that somehow this made all of the crap he put me through before, during and after the birth worth it.
The only sure thing I have from it is that he can never say he wasn't allowed at the birth because of ME. All of his actions are on him, and I haven't stopped him seeing her at any point (other than when he was drunk or 3 hours late - back when he pretended to care for DD).
Bit of a ramble, but thought I should post to give you my story, in case it affects how you see your own happening.
After posting all of that, I think leave the fecker behind, actually!

Lioninthesun Wed 08-Jan-14 09:03:06

Oh and I forgot to add the MW's kept him in a separate room from me for hours as he was apparently impeding my dilation. I never fully dilated (only got to 7 after 3 days and A LOT of oxytocin) and suspect that this was because I was focusing on him and his whining nearly completely throughout.

Serobin Wed 08-Jan-14 09:08:09

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SinisterSal Wed 08-Jan-14 09:48:01

People are not recommending she never puts him on the cert - just he hasn't proven himself in anyway responsible and helpful so far. When he does, people are suggesting that parental rights etc can be sorted then. Perhaps it's not the most noble approach but it's certainly the most pragmatic one - she doesn't have to be a martyr about this at all, nor him for that matter. Parenthood lasts a lifetime there is plenty time to see he earns the title. I am quite sure he will step up and be a good father, in which case it could all be sorted by the childs' first birthday and be irrelevant. Imo anyway.

CouthyMow Wed 08-Jan-14 10:02:09

Not been here for a while, but just to mention that now, even if a Father is not named on the Birth Certificate, it is no barrier whatsoever to them getting Parental Responsibility (PR).

All they have to do is go to Court, request a DNA test, done by a simple cheek swab, and if the DNA proves Parentage, they automatically get PR awarded despite not being named on the Birth Certificate.

If they are the biological Father, and there are no concerns that he will hurt the child (irrespective of whether he is likely to hurt the Mother), then they automatically get PR now.

Just to dispel any myths on that.

As for the actual question, no, there is no way he can force his presence on you during your labour. If you tell the midwives that you do NOT want him allowed in the room, they will keep him out. And if he causes a scene about that, they will have him removed by hospital security, and/or call the police!

TheDoctrineOf2014 Wed 08-Jan-14 10:06:26

He is going to miss the woman he left when she was 7 months pregnant with his child going through a serious medical procedure where she needs to stay focussed for herself and the child.

This isn't something the OP is depriving him of - he took the decision to leave and to act like a twat thereafter.

CouthyMow Wed 08-Jan-14 10:13:14

No Court will give him overnight contact with a breast fed baby that us under a year old. Legally even the Courts have to be seen to promote breast feeding. Been there with my DS3, as I split up with his Father when he was 4 months old. He got laughed out of the Court room basically. He wasn't allowed to take him away from me for more than 2 hours at a time until he was 7 months old, as I was his food source and he was a bottle refuser. Then 3 hours at a time until he was 9 months old, then 4-5 hours at a time until DS3 was 1yo.

Most of the Court Ordered contact was that my Ex was to come to my home 2-3 evenings a week, for 2-3 hours an evening, to see him. It was my choice to allow him into my home, I didn't have to - I was given the choice of using a Contact Centre but turned it down. I was fine having my Ex at mine, you don't have to be.

ALSO no Court is allowed to order you to allow your Ex to 'top up' his breast feeds with formula for access, OR to force you to express, as not everybody can express enough.

The power here is with what is best for your child, not with your Twunt of an Ex.

Your Ex is mistaking the right of your CHILD to see both parents as a right for HIM to see your child. He's got a few shocks coming if he tries to go through the Courts!

JugglingIntoANewYear Wed 08-Jan-14 10:24:30

Happy due date Mummy thanks
And glad you've made a firm decision on this - think your Mum or your Sister will be much more supportive to you.
I had a long wait with mine mind you - 10 days and 8 days over - but I didn't mind at all.
We'll all be thinking of you over the next week or two x

Mummy2014 Wed 08-Jan-14 13:18:26

Thank you all for your replies.

I will name on him on the birth certificate, he is the father & I don't want my baby questioning why I didn't add him later in life. That said however, the baby is having my last name.

Whilst it bothers me he will be missing the birth of his first child, he has shown little or no concern for my welfare since leaving at 7 months & to be honest, labour is about mine & the babies needs, and nothing to do with his ego.
He is the person who left me nearly homeless, has provided no financial support for the baby things I have bought, and even turned round in mothercare the other day "I'm gona ask the cashier for her number, she's fit" he claims to say these things to wind me up & stress me, if he finds it so easy to do that now, what other stupid things will he say or do in labour!?


Lioninthesun Wed 08-Jan-14 13:27:21

Completely up to you re birth cert - but remember he has to actually turn up if he is going on it. My ex didn't bother!
Also he can then stop you from leaving the country and other things, if he is on it. I was pretty glad he wasn't in the end.

Layter Wed 08-Jan-14 13:46:30

Good luck for your due date 2014!

I chose not to have my ex at the birth of our child, and it was definitely the best thing to do. I had the perfect experience -very chilled out and unstressy. With him there I know that would have been different. This is YOUR moment, far more critical for you to relax and bond.

I am breastfeeding and he has realised that he won't get much time with dd for a year or more. We meet once a week at a cafe and that's his time with her, I will adapt this as time changes things.

Same as you, he's on the birth certificate but dd has my name. If it helps I think that as separated parents we are doing very well for ds and dd, together we were dreadful.

Put him to the back of your mind op, put yourself first.

PinkandGreenStripes Wed 08-Jan-14 17:24:00

Good luck OP.

MrsPatMustard Sat 11-Jan-14 09:01:45

My midwife told me that excessive anxiety can cause labour to stall because it floods your body with the wrong kind of hormones - therefore, if having him there is going to ramp up your level of stress, you've got every right to say 'no'. It's your body and your labour and you want the process to go as smoothly as possible...

Mummy2014 Sat 11-Jan-14 10:21:37

Thank you all.

3 days overdue now! wonder if him stressing me out now is making this baby stall in coming out? Daily messages saying I'm a bitch etc, he doesn't realise all he is doing is making me believe him not being there is 100% the right decision.

TheDoctrineOf2014 Sat 11-Jan-14 10:31:14

Mummy, 3 days overdue is very common, don't worry!

1974rach Sat 11-Jan-14 10:59:44

So sorry he is still being a twat!

Give your phone to someone else. However make sure you are keeping his texts.

Ignore him, he's not important but you and the baby are.

Take care

JugglingBackwardsAndForwards Sat 11-Jan-14 12:41:44

Am sorry he's sending you unpleasant texts.
What an arse.
Ignore if poss. Get a new phone?

Regarding being 3 days over, some babies are just very happy where they are. Mine were 10 days and 8 days "late"
I didn't mind. They were easier to look after in than out to be honest!
But of course it's lovely when you get to meet them smile

Mummy2014 Sat 11-Jan-14 15:40:57

Oh yea, this is much much easier than having a newborn, I'm not particularly uncomfortable, I'm sleeping ok, still managing to walk the dog a few miles a day - I was expecting to feel like I was dying but for me, the end of pregnancy is proving quite easy - so far, of course it could all change very quickly.

That said - hurry up baby, I'm a little bored of waiting for you ;-) xx

Melonbreath Tue 14-Jan-14 09:42:09

He's a knob. If he's this awful and selfish now he'd be unbelievable during labour. Tell him when it's all done and you're back home, with someone there for support.
And as for night visits on a breastfeeding baby, HAHAHAHAHA! What a tool. A year on and I'm STILL on two feeds a night.
right now it's all about you, after childbirth it's all about you AND the baby. His job is support and he obviously can't do that so tell him to naff off

JugglingBackwardsAndForwards Tue 14-Jan-14 12:11:10

Well I reckon, mostly, that every day over your due date is a bit of a bonus - you're still doing a fab job of nurturing your little one, but you also get to put your feet up all day and drink a hot cup of tea - or sit in the garden eating strawberries as I remember doing on day 41+2 with dd.
Easier for me, probably easier life for her too - all cosy and warm with strawberries on tap as well grin

Of course, saying that, it will be lovely to meet your LO too thanks

Lioninthesun Tue 14-Jan-14 13:05:32

Sorry to hear he is being so childish OP. You are right though, doesn't make him win any esteem as a great father.
I think you are right re the stress making you overdue. I had the same with my ex and had to be induced because of it. Try to relax and ignore him. Good luck again for the birth!

JugglingBackwardsAndForwards Tue 14-Jan-14 14:09:44

Personally I wouldn't give him the credit in terms of saying that the stress is making you overdue.
Your baby is probably just perfectly happy where it is for now - and the EDD is just that, an estimate. It is perfectly normal to be a week or two either side of that.
And as I said at least you get to finish a hot cup of tea and sit on your backside all day (if you want to) smile

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