Did you have a midwife with you the whole time you were pushing?

(26 Posts)
Eatingdoughnuts Mon 10-Dec-12 21:41:35

We are considering trying to TTC #4 and DH and I were talking today about my birth with DC3. I have quite quick labours and a couple of hours after arriving at the hospital I said I needed to push. The midwife said 'push away', and basically just carried on bustling around, doing paperwork and flitting in and out of the room. She only really took notice when I said the baby's head was coming out. I think I was probably pushing for around half an hour or so, on my knees leaning over the back of the bed.

There is a fairly large age gap between DC2 and DC3, and I was wondering if this is the way they do things now? Or perhaps she thought I wasn't ready to push so just humoured me a bit? Anyone else had similar?

HorraceTheChristmasOtter Mon 10-Dec-12 21:43:49

Yes, I did. It was only for 8 minutes though, so I'd have been quite pissed off had she felt the need to do something else in that time... This was earlier this year.

No. But it was 4 hrs 30 mins...! There was someone there for most of it though.

peeriebear Mon 10-Dec-12 21:46:25

Yes, I think so. Lovely local MW-led unit where I was the only one in, though.

Eatingdoughnuts Mon 10-Dec-12 21:46:41

I think she probably thought I wasn't ready to deliver so would just be grunting and bearing down a bit for a while, rather than full on pushing. I was pretty noisy though and made it clear to her that the baby was coming. I literally had to spell out 'I think when I have another contraction the baby's head is going to come out', then of course she said all the 'don't push, I've got to get gloves on' and started telling me to breathe through contractions.

weeblueberry Tue 11-Dec-12 11:41:21

You pushed for 4 hours and 30 minutes PotteringAlone?? Bloody hell...

Yes, the midwife was with me throughout the pushing. About 45 mins.

I'd add that, I got the impression that had it been 4.5 hours shock she'd have been there for that too.

No. I have one of those really horrible NHS birth stories. I didn't know I was ready to push because it was my first. I was completely left alone with my DH. In the evening, they were going to send me home again, but they were going to do a sweep to hurry me along. But when they examined me (the first time after going in for 2 days because my water broke), I was fully dilated. Then I had midwife with me and I pushed for an hour before they got a ventouse. It's only at that point I knew I was pushing (but holding back by my instinct) all day since early morning. It just felt like I had very bad constipation to me hmm.

This was last year btw. I think the funding level means a lot of mums were sent home even though they are very far along. Another mum in my group got into second stage at home. She had to be taken into hospital by an ambulance as she couldn't move and had to be carried by a stretcher.

Yes. She was fab, she was there but let me get on with it iykwim really encouraged me when things got tricky and I was exhausted (long long induction) and kept me focussed in theatre where DS was eventually born with forceps (and she gave me good drugs grin )

cbeebiesatemybrain Tue 11-Dec-12 14:55:48

No with dc1, another bad nhs experience like onelittle.

Dc2 was a planned homebirth and I had fantastic care, mw didn't leave me at all.

TheElfOnThePanopticon Tue 11-Dec-12 14:59:25

Use, but they were both home births. First time round (nhs) I'd rather have been left alone a bit more, to be honest. second time (independent midwife) the midwife was there but stayed carefully out of view until I needed her.

Yes, but to be honest it took only 4 pushes to get dd out! Plus it was a quiet Sunday, it looked as if I was the only person in labour!

rosamarina Tue 11-Dec-12 15:26:15

I was left alone at points with DS1. Tried for a homebirth, ended up going to hospital during a very long second stage - I'd been pushing at home for about 2 hours already - and once I was there they hooked me up to a monitor and buggered off. DH says he got the impression there was a fairly serious emergency going on for someone else, which might explain it, but for a while it was just me and DH in this awful hospital room with the machine emitting random bleeps and me pushing. It was a bit of a shock after being at home with a midwife constantly with me. DS1 was born by ventouse in the end once one of the doctors was free to do it.

mycatlikestwiglets Tue 11-Dec-12 15:34:16

I didn't, and am another who had a bad NHS birth experience. The delivery suite at my hospital was completely overwhelmed when I went in (on Christmas day) and after over 48 hours of labour I was left alone for most of the hour they'd given me to try to push DS out, despite the fact that I made clear I couldn't feel the contractions due to the epidural I'd had. DH had to try to work out from the monitor when I was contracting so that I had some idea of when I should try to push. Needless to say it didn't work and I ended up being rushed into theatre and delivering DS by ventouse.

Next time I'm thinking about getting a doula to make sure I have some guaranteed guidance/support all the way through.

I was left alone (with DH) during my first birth. I was pushing for about 2 hours and the midwife was in and out, sometimes gone for 15 minutes at a time. DH was very unimpressed as he felt vulnerable being alone with me (things weren't going well and DD's heart rate kept dipping) and was terrified something was going to go wrong with no-one there (it did all go wrong and ended up with the usual room filling with people situation and forceps - all ok in the end).

Second birth I only pushed for 5 minutes to get DS out, midwife was luckily there as it was so quick she only had time to get one glove on!

sparklekitty Tue 11-Dec-12 17:43:14

I was pushing for 2.5 hours and midwife didn't leave the room, she stayed out of sight a bit. The last hour I also had a consultant as dd got stuck and needed ventouse. Midwife stayed even while doc was there. They were very busy (labour ward closes shortly after I was admitted) so I feel lucky I wasn't left. That was 11 weeks ago

cbeebiesatemybrain Tue 11-Dec-12 18:22:34

mycat and anyone else who is worried about not being supported during labour I 100% recommend having a doula. I felt really scared because of how I was treated when in labour with dc1 so I had a doula for dc2's birth and she really helped keep everything calm and made sure the mw read and followed my birth plan. If there is a dc3 we will definitely have a doula again.

Sorry for the hijack op!

ReallyTired Tue 11-Dec-12 18:28:19

Yes,I had a midwife with both children.

Had 15 mintues of pushing with ds and 3 minutes of pushing with dd.

I recommend homebirth because you get one to one care. Supposely you get 2 to one care during the second stage. I only had one midwife as the second midwife didn't get there in time.

Welovecouscous Tue 11-Dec-12 19:54:05

Yes and pushing for 3 hrs smile

I did smile it was only much later when I looked at my notes that I realized it was anything like that long!

MrsJohnDeere Tue 11-Dec-12 21:56:59

Yes. Two for the whole time with both labours (5 hours and 1 hour).

Rachel130690 Tue 11-Dec-12 22:05:28

I had a mw the whole way through my labour. The only time I didn't have a mw was for a few mins when she had to get a doc to sign off on my diamorphine.

I was fully dialated around 8pm and baby was born at 10.03pm.

I was induced though do not sure if it made any difference.

ItsAllGoingToBeFine Tue 11-Dec-12 22:16:47

I had 2/3 midwives for the whole shebang. (NHS scotland)

Welovecouscous Tue 11-Dec-12 22:29:55

Omg having read some of these stories I am even more certain I'm having a doula next time.

Bibblebobbleparsnip Tue 11-Dec-12 22:33:01

I did have a MW for my first (5 hrs in hospital) but DC2 was a surprise home birth so did that one alone (1hr 50 mins) and had to be rushed to hospital as DS got dropped on his head due to the speed he came out blush DC3 was a planned home birth but only 35 mins (or 23 if you go by the official papers) so MW didn't make it then either. DH did catch her though... MW appeared v.out of breath and apologetic about 5 mins later and cut the cord. Won't be having a DC4 methinks!

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