Having student midwifes and Drs present at your birth?

[Louisexox]

I'm 38 weeks gone with my 1st baby, and I hate the idea of having student midwifes or Drs present at my birth I mentioned this to my midwife and she basically called me selfish saying "why would you do that how else are they meant to learn" I'm claustrophobic and being in small rooms with a lot of people panics me and I also would like as much privacy as possible.

I understand they need to learn but I'm sure there are other womans bits they can look at other than mine.

Does anyone else feel the same, or diff?.

Also do they have to ask your permission before they allow a student to enter the room?.

Thanks.

[LadyOfWaffle]

They should ask permission but honestly you will really not care. Trust me It's not that common I don't think anyway, no point making yourself worry about it

[lulumama]

you can refuse permission, you do not have to agree

yes, student MWs and doctors do need to learn from someone , but you don;t have to be that one, especially if you will feel overwhelmed

your decision

[onepieceoflollipop]

You are not out of order at all. I do not feel the same as you, but that doesn't mean that your feelings are not valid.

Imo your midwife has been quite insensitive to you.

Yes they should ask permission, but just to be sure mention when you arrive at hospital that this is your wish (or get your birth partner to remind them)

Best wishes for your birth.

[Portofino]

I had one - she was lovely.

[mrsout]

I allowed a student midwife in. But I wouldnt let her examine me. Instead, the poor cow had to rub the small of my back for hours while I groaned and moaned away. I even screamed at her for stopping to rest her arm! But They will ask you first.

[ImnotMamaGbutsheLovesMe]

They won't be looking at your bits, anymore than necessary!

A student midwife delivered my last baby and I was so proud as I was the last one she had to do as a student and it was a very serious situation which she handled perfectly. And btw the room was full of doctors and I was oblivious.

[fryalot]

I had a student doc with me throughout my entire hospital labour with dd1. I was asked politely, and it was made perfectly clear to me that if I had any problems at all then he would be asked to leave.

Every time I was examined, the real doc did it, then asked if it was okay if the student doc did it, then the student doc himself asked for permission, it was all very tiresome in a way, all the asking for permission, when I just wanted them to get on with it!!!

I didn't have a student with either dd2 or ds, I wasn't even asked.

If you feel even slightly uncomfortable, feel free to say no. It is YOUR body and only you have the right to say who can be involved with it.

You are not being selfish at all.

And it's quite possible, as LoW says, you won't mind when the moment actually comes, please don't spend the last few weeks of your pregnancy worrying about this.

[wheresthehamster]

I loved the students. They made the whole experience much better ime. I'd had dd1 in another hospital and no one was friendly at all. The teaching hospital where I had dd2, we were all on first name terms. Just because they are students doesn't mean they are fresh out of uni, loads are older.

A student (in her 50s) stitched me up and the mentor kept making comments like "Not there FGS!" "Oh, you've done it NOW!" etc. Lessened the pain considerably!

[popsycal]

a student midwife deluvered ds2
a student midwife examined me in labour with ds3 and a student doctor helped to deiver ds3
they were all wonderful

[biggreypants]

Agree with lulumama it's totally up to you.
I said on my notes no students but when I got to hospital the students were much more sympathetic and interested in me rather than just getting the baby out I was glad they were in the room.
The hardened midwife I had was rather matter of fact and quite scary!

[Snaf]

Yes, they have to ask your permission beforehand. And yes, you are quite within your rights to say you don't want one.

Your mw is out of order to insinuate that you are selfish in not wanting other people around during your labour/birth. It's totally your choice.

Stand firm - write it on your birth plan in big letters and say (or get your partner to) when you come in that you don't want anyone other than qualified staff looking after you.

One thing though - many women think that saying 'yes to students' means the room will be full of people all staring at her bits, gathered round the bed like in those Carry On films . It won't - there should never be more than one student present. A good student can also be invaluable in offering continuous support when the mw is busy elsewhere... But you are perfectly within your rights to say NO! and no-one should make you feel bad about it.

[expatinscotland]

I had a student midwife in her last year help deliver DD2 and I was glad she was there. She was supervised by a senior midwife and really helped. Had no problem with her being there.

When I needed a forceps delivery with DD1, the senior midwife was very pleased with the consultant who came to attend me, she told me I was very lucky to have her and I really was. She did a fab job.

She asked as the anaesthetist was topping up my epidural if I would permit 3 student docs she hand-chose to observe and I was fine with that, too, as long as they were polite and professional and she assured me she would not chose students who weren't.

They were all lovely and all came to visit us and were thankful to be able to see a competent physician doing her job.

I was glad to help because I'd rather have them learn on me than go out and butcher someone else later on.

At the end of the day, I did not feel precious about my bits during that time of my life and the way I saw it is that I'd rather have them learning as much as possible with supervisors around, both midwives and docs, then turned loose on people without having had adequate opportunity to learn.

[expatinscotland]

Yes, I had one student doc with me for DD1 until I got to 8cm and then she had to leave, but she got to stay for midwive breaking the waters!

She was from a large Asian family and I found her presence a real comfort.

I've had students examine me during this pregnancy, they're learning to measure the bump and feel the baby.

Again, I'm fine with it.

They're usually so tentative you have to tell them it's okay to touch you, not just tickle you.

[wheresthehamster]

Is that true snaf?

I had 6 young students cram in to watch my controlled water break. It was the only time I felt slightly embarrassed, but I think that was because none of them spoke.

[Snaf]

Yep, students are almost invariably gentler too

But privacy/security is really important too, so if it makes you feel uncomfortable louise, don't think twice about saying no.

[biggreypants]

also the midwifes/consultants might be a little less likely to feck anything up if they are being watched?

[TheProvincialLady]

I had it written in my last birth plan that there were to be no students or unnecessary people in the room and they respected it. No one said it was unreasonable and it isn't - your MW was out of order.

I had a student MW measure my bump last week and she measured me 5cm too big I know I am big but not THAT big! I don't mind students in my antenatal care at all, just not at the birth.

[Snaf]

It does depend a bit on what's happening, hamster. Obviously if it's something unusual then you might end up with a few more faces, but in the course of a normal labour there really shouldn't be more than one student present. Birth isn't a spectator sport after all!

[Tigerschick]

I had a student mid-wife in when DD was born. She was fantastic.
DH said that it was good for him because she went to get me water and hot towels and things which meant that he and the mid-wife could both stay with me. Also, he found that having them talking to each other about what was happeing meant that he could understand what was going on better, which helped him to feel more comfortable.

That said, it's entirely your choice ... but I wouldn't think that the way you feel now will have much bearing on how you'll feel when you are in labour.

Good luck with everything

[Snaf]

Med students are more likely to travel in packs, especially in obstetric placements. They tend not to talk either...

[fedupandisolated]

Louis - they should ask you. If they suggest a student midwife it will be just that ONE student midwife who will work with the qualified midwife. TBH it might be nice as you'll have two members of staff fussing over you rather than just one.
Student midwives also seem much more clued up about the idea of supporting women through their contractions.

[fedupandisolated]

... oh and if you decide not to have a student you are NOT being selfish. YOUR body, YOUR baby and YOUR choice. End of.

[bristols]

A first year student midwife delivered DS2 and she did a wonderful job. As a nurse myself I suppose I might be a bit more relaxed about these things. At the end of the day, though, it is your choice and you are well within your rights to refuse.

Like LofW said, you probably won't care, but make it clear at the beginning and they will respect your wishes.

I think your MW was out of order BTW.

[chequers]

I had a lovely med student when dd was born. She just watched and I think maybe held my arm at one point.

She came to see me afterwards and said thank you so much for letting her stay as it had been an amazing experience.

It didn't bother me at all her being there but of course you must do what is right for you, you are the most important person.

Good luck!

[No1GruffaloHunter]

Hi,

Its entirely your decision and you shouldn't be made to feel guilty if you don't want them there. I'm sure your unit has lots of births and lots of other couples would be happy so they are hardly going to miss out.

FWIW I had a lovely student MW at the birth of my DD. She had only just started her training and I was her first delivery. Not much use but she did make nice toast...