worried, scared and a bit disappointed.

(8 Posts)
MrsBartlettforthewin Tue 09-Feb-16 15:59:50

Saw my midwife today (I'm 38+6) and things have suddenly gone from being very straight forward to the following.

Baby is suddenly measuring small so am having an emergency growth scan asap. hospital will be ringing me in the morning. This has really worried me as at my last appointment I was measuring ahead by two weeks. This has really scared me that something is wrong but the baby has been moving just as much as normal and his heart beat was fine when she listened to it today.

She has also made me a consult appointment for tomorrow as my SPD has got so bad I can't barely walk with my crutches anymore let alone be mobile during labour (couldn't even get out of bed this morning with out DH's help) Due to this and in conjunction with the small measurements that I should be induced early. This is were the disappointment comes in I'd been planning a home birth and at my 36 week appointment we did all the risk assessment stuff and we were good to go, have even got a birth pool set up down stairs just waiting to be used. But due to my lack of mobility she strongly recommends I go into hospital instead and with the worries over baby's size doesn't think it will be safe anymore.

Now my normal practical brain says this all makes sense and whatever is safest for baby is all I want however my hormonal pregnancy brain has had me in tears since the appointment as I feel like I'm failing all of a sudden on so many fronts - baby isn't growing, my body isn't managing like it should with pregnancy, and now I'm probably going to end up with interventions that are a far cry from the natural home birth I wanted.

Anyone else had a last minute drastic change to their plans? If you did how did you manage with the change in expectations? I'm Worried I'm going to end up being really disappointed in the birth which is ridiculous (this is DC3) as really all that matters is a happy healthy baby at the end of it.

Wow sorry for such a long winded moan, thanks for reading.

lilac3033 Tue 09-Feb-16 16:41:42

Didn't want to read and run. Just because you measured small at the midwives doesn't mean the baby isn't growing properly. The measurements are not always correct. You might find the baby has moved round, hence the change. I would wait and see how the scan goes, you might still get your birth!

MrsBenWyatt Tue 09-Feb-16 17:05:35

I am pregnant with DC3 (due in 3 weeks). Not one of my births so far has gone to plan! First, I was induced due to PE, second was a crash section and DS and I were lucky to survive. I am crap at pregnancy, despite being perfectly fit and well when not pregnant! This baby is a (lovely) surprise as I had decided I am not made to bear children, although they are fabulous when they eventually arrive.

Although I was disappointed to never have a beautiful, calm water birth, I have my beautiful children and I have made peace with the fact that it's not how they arrive but that they are safe that matters.

Fundal height measurements are very inaccurate, as I am sure you know. In this pg, DC3 was measuring fine according to FH, but scan said he was small. Now FH is small, but he apparently weighs 6lb 9oz already at 36 weeks and is 95th centile! Wait until the scan until you worry about size.

Secondly, at your gestation, if baby isn't growing they will be fine to come out now. They might not emerge the way you were planning, but sometimes babies are better out than in and you will get to see your baby a few weeks earlier. I have to have a CS this time, which isn't ideal, but I miss a week of pregnancy!!!

Good luck with the scan, but don't panic!

MrsBartlettforthewin Tue 09-Feb-16 17:26:59

Thank you both. This is the common sense I needed to hear smile Think my lack of sleep is really beginning to take its toll. Will just stay focused on the lovely end result of having my baby.

Mumberjack Thu 11-Feb-16 19:50:27

you might find that baby is measuring perfectly fine when you get the scan - I'm always astounded that the old tape measure on belly thing is still used, it seems so antiquated and inaccurate (and causes a lot of unnecessary worry in many cases!!).

Even if they recommend it will be safest to have your baby in hospital, and sooner rather than later, you'll be able to discuss ways to make labour as comfortable and homely as possible.

Whataboutnodetox Thu 11-Feb-16 19:54:14

I had very, very severe spd in my first pregnancy. They refused to induce me on those grounds and I went naturally at nearly 42 weeks. I ended up in hospital giving birth with an epidural and in stirrups. I had planned a home birth but had to go in when I failed to progress after waters broke. I'd refuse induction unless there is a definite need, you are more likely to need intervention and you will be more comfortable at home.

originalusernamefail Thu 11-Feb-16 19:56:02

Please try not to worry OP with DS1 I measured bang on for dates, everyone told me to expect a huuuuggge baby, he was born 40+6 at 7lb 4oz. With DS 2 I measured 34cm at 40 weeks, growth scan and placental doppler showed nothing concerning, he was born naturally at 40+3 weighing 8lb 5oz, a full pound heavier than his 'enormous' bother grin. I wouldn't worry yourself too much until you have your growth scan, a home birth could still be in your future.

MrsBartlettforthewin Sat 13-Feb-16 20:28:10

Scan was fine baby within perfectly acceptable ranges and placenta doing it's job just fine. smile But have been basically told that a home birth isn't happening this time. Both midwife and consultant think that my lack of mobility will be an issue - which as I cannot get in an out of bed/ up from sofas by myself anymore or walk without crutches is kind of understandable I guess but is taking a bit of time to get my head around.

Have been offered an induction for Friday which I haven't decided on yet. I had one with my first DC and though not the worst birth anyone has every had it certainly wasn't as simple and calm as my second when I went naturally. Will see how much more of not being able to move I can take. Though with all the Braxton hicks I've been having yesterday and today and the show I had yesterday I'm hoping it's a choice I won't need to make. (fingers crossed)

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