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Childbirth

ELCS due to anxiety & emetophobia but terrified

18 replies

Ftm2015 · 10/09/2015 19:58

I have been granted a planned c section due to severe anxiety history and also having emetophobia. Ironic I know as a lot of women can be sick during a c section. For me I have had some time to think about this as I am now 35+2 and both natural childbirth and c section terrifies me. However weighing up all of the options I felt that a section was the lesser of the evils for me.

I feel all sorts....guilt...terror...excitement and my emotions are so mixed. Am I making the right decision? Anyone want to share their story or offer advice? I just want what is best for me and my baby but I just feel I cannot win no matter what I decide! x

OP posts:

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CocktailQueen · 10/09/2015 20:00

Why do you think your anxiety/emetophobia may be better in a CS? I had a CS and a VBAC and felt much more in control during my VBAC - the CS worried me so much more as I felt out of it and out of control. I appreciate everyone reacts differently, but something to consider?

Ftm2015 · 10/09/2015 20:19

I actually feel more in control with the ELCS as I know when it is happening, what will happen how long it will take etc...a lot of my anxiety is about being in control so if I opt to have a natural birth then I would just have to wait. There are so many elements of natural childbirth that terrify me I felt that a section was the best option. It's hard to explain life history in a paragraph but in general that is how I feel x

OP posts:

CocktailQueen · 10/09/2015 22:44

Well, go for that option then. You will be better placed to welcome your child if you are calmer and feel more in control. Good luck x

Cornberry · 10/09/2015 23:09

I have anxiety and had a c section last week and it was fine. Wasn't sick either despite vomiting throughout pregnancy. Don't feel guilty. You could plan for a vaginal birth as I did and it could end up in an emergency c section like mine. It's very quick and you get to meet baby almost immediately :) you will be fine x

niceupthedance · 10/09/2015 23:13

I had c section for emetophobia - I pass out when I feel sick. I had a dodgy moment when they injected me with something before I lay down but it was totally manageable. I thank god all the time I had a section. It was great.

Matilda30 · 11/09/2015 10:00

I'm having an ELCS due to anxiety. I'm still anxious about the procedure, but a lot less than I would be about a vaginal birth. I feel the guilt too, it's crap

RedToothBrush · 11/09/2015 14:20

Guilt: would you feel guilty if you had a vb which made your anxiety worse and had an impact on your baby as a result?

So whatever you do you might end up feeling guilt. So why waste energy on that if you think that a CS is the best option for you.

Remember an elcs for anxiety is for medical reasons. Would you think the same if you had placenta previa or your baby was breech and an Elcs was recommended? Why should it be any different for mental health.

I had an elcs for anxiety. It was hard. Harder than I thought it would be. BUT I wasn't sick and I still think it was the better option than the alternative for me.

It was manageable and that was the point. I could prepare my head and they talked me through things and were very understanding.

Don't let the emotion of guilt rule how you feel. Separate the logical side of your decision from the emotional one. Let the logic win.

The only person you have to justify your decision to is yourself. Not even your baby, as you will make the decision that's best for both of you from the information you have available now.

Guilt is a manifestation of your anxiety too.

Silvercatowner · 12/09/2015 14:45

Kudos to you. I was TERRIFIED of throwing up when I was in labour - I went without pain relief in an attempt to not feel/be sick (thank god it worked). CSs weren't a 'thing' 30 years ago, had they been I may have considered begging for one. So much lack of awareness of emet - time and time again I was told 'if you do feel sick/are sick you won't notice - so much going on, including a new baby' - hell, I'd've been out the door, baby or not.

FluffyPersian · 12/09/2015 18:36

Ftm - Sadly I can't tell you my story as I'm only 5 weeks today, but I just wanted to say that I totally can relate to how you feel. I have severe anxiety and I'm utterly terrified of a normal birth (after witnessing my sister give birth 2.5 years ago which didn't go well at all). I went to the Drs for an unrelated matter and burst into tears about the fact I was pregnant and said there were two options - termination or ELCS.

He suggested I get an appointment with the midwife ASAP and I went the same day to discuss my concerns. She was lovely and tried to phone up the Consultant who wasn't answering, so phoned the head midwife who suggested she write a letter to the Head Consultant, stating my anxiety levels and also come back in 4 weeks time to do a dating scan and kick things off that way - so I'd only be just over 8 weeks and still have time to make a decision.

I also feel exactly the same as you - Utterly terrified, anxious - I have to feel in control and the thought of going into labour at any time, anywhere, not knowing how long it will be, if there will be forceps, if I'm allowed pain relief (they refused my sister an epidural)... It's just too, too much for me to cope with.

I have felt so guilty the past week since I found out - Everyone else seems so happy to have a BFP and I'm just petrified.

For what it's worth, I think you are making the right decision as it's for you and if you're less worried / stressed as you have the control (and I so get that) then I think you'll be fine.

I also think RedToothBrush is spot on - I actually copied and pasted one of her posts in another thread about ELCS as it totally rang true - You can prepare your head and for people like us, it's so important.

You're not alone

Mouthfulofquiz · 12/09/2015 18:42

I think it sounds like a really good idea. I've been sick during both labours and if I wanted to avoid that, in a controlled way, I would imagine that a c section would be the most sensible. Good luck

hazeyjane · 12/09/2015 18:49

Have you spoken to the MW about the emetophobia - do you know if there is anything that can be given to you in the event of nausea during or post section? It may be worth asking, in the build up to the section - as there is the possibility of vomiting during/post section.

Good luck.

anxious123 · 15/09/2015 11:14

I had a semi planned section - semi planned as in I'd had the counselling etc then went into spontaneous Labour 4 days before my planned section date oops.

It was as nice as it could be. Very gentle with me pre op. Offered to talk to me during but I told them to be quiet lol. Born just after 1.30 in the afternoon, I was up and about unaided by 10pm, catheter out by 8.30am. They will need to check your pad in recovery to monitor bleeding, and you may not have the mobility/stability to assist them so be warned about that as I got a shock!

Don't feel guilty, everyone has their reasons and if this is what is right for you then this is what is right for you.

elliejjtiny · 15/09/2015 18:44

You have nothing to feel guilty about. Anxiety is just as much a medical reason as a breech baby or placenta previa.

I have anxiety too and I planned homebirths because that felt like the best option for me. I felt more in control in my own home. However vaginal birth is often unpredictable and if you struggle with that it sounds like elcs is the best option for you as they mostly happen exactly as they are supposed to. I was sick during my C-section but I was also sick during my labours too. They can give you anti sickness drugs with a planned C-section though.

Ftm2015 · 26/09/2015 10:01

Thanks all for your messages of support and advice. I am going ahead with the section. The midwife has said to me when I arrive to let everyone know ie the whole team in the theatre about my phobia so that they can minimise the risk of me being sick. They do give you anti sickness injection so I will make sure that they pump me full of the stuff so I will be ok!! It is also on my maternity notes that I have emetophobia. I agree that even nowadays people don't know what the phobia is!! I have come across so many midwives doctors obstetricians that have never heard of it!!!

You have made me feel so much better thank you all for your messages. Now all I have to do is wait 2 weeks to meet my wee man and I can't wait I am remaining positive about the operation too X

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Roomba · 26/09/2015 10:07

Good luck with your section. I've had two, and wasn't sick with either. But just be aware, during both of mine I was injected with something to help get the placenta out (this is done after vaginal births too) and both times within seconds I could feel my heart racing and I felt very, very sick which panicked me (am also emetophobic but not the reason I had 2 sections). The anaesthetist reassured me and it passed off in a minute or two. They will give you ranitidine the night before and on the morning, which should help to prevent any sickness and stomach issues anyway.

Two weeks to go! How lovely and exciting for you. Get lots of rest now while you can, as you will feel very tired afterwards for a while (it's been about ten years for me ). You will have the nicest compensation for all that tiredness though, you gorgeous wee man!

Ftm2015 · 26/09/2015 10:24

Thanks Roomba. I know they can't guarantee to stop me feeling sick but as long as it's just the feeling and nothing else and I have been told about that injection making you feel poorly as my sister in law was very sick when she had it. I know it sounds stupid but I am obviously not a sickly person and haven't been ill during my pregnancy so I hope it will pass quite quickly.

I am sure when he is in my arms it will all be forgotten thanks for your help x

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RedToothBrush · 29/09/2015 18:47

Good luck. Glad you feel at peace with your decision as that is important even if things don't go to plan. You have made the right decision for you.

SarinaJ · 01/10/2015 10:50

I think it sounds like the right decision for you so do not feel guilty at all. Relaxation techniques/hypnotherapy etc could also really help you in the lead up to make sure you don't have this anxiety or stress leading up to the CS.

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