Contraception following childbirth

[mrsm22]

I realise this is not the right place to post this thread but thought it might be the place where I would be likely to get the best response.
I have birth to my second baby 9 weeks ago today and had a period start a week ago but still haven't gone back to having a sex life with my husband as yet. I feel really stressed out about contraception as I feel there is no long term solution for us and we haven't had sex for nearly a year as I can't do it while I'm pregnant for risk of bleeding so shortly after I found out I was pregnant with my second child I stopped anything. My husband doesn't say anything or pressure but now I've had the all clear at my postnatal check up I'd like to resume a normal sex life. I'm not happy to have a coil as I don't like the idea of something left inside me and I took the pill for 4 days, I'm meant to take it tonight as day 5 but I haven't bothered as I am uneasy about putting hormones into my body after two children and being 33. All the options are hormone ones and I think it's unsafe now. I know many people who just use condoms but I'd be scared in case one split or came off so it's just a big problem. Does anyone have any suggestions or been in a similar position? I wonder what most people do after children and as they start to get older. Any advice greatly appreciated.

[scaevola]

Firstly, MN has a Contraception topic and although it's a bit hit-and-miss for amount of traffic there, I think you might find it worth a browse as most methods have been discussed there at some point.

Secondly, if you don't want a coil and hormonal methods are out, then the range of options is limited.

Barrier methods (condom or diaphragm) are the obvious possibilities, and with "perfect" use have a low fail rate, but as they must be used correctly, every single time, the "typical" use fail rate is somewhat higher.

NFP (if you combine temperature/mucous/calendar) is also more reliable than often thought, and if you have clear signs of ovulation might be something to consider (using barrier methods during the 'at risk' times).

We used NFP plus condoms successfully for many years, but when my cycle went a bit weird (start of the perimenopause) we decided on a surgical option and DH had a vasectomy. But I was quite a bit older than you before I was in any way ready to remove fertility permanently.