Words of encouragement much needed..... Hitting the wall

(34 Posts)
varicoseveins Mon 10-Feb-14 20:28:32

I'm 40+5 today and lost my mucous plug on Saturday, followed by more on Sunday and today. Saturday I was having tightenings that I would exactly say we're painful which stopped around 8pm & Sunday I had painful contractions that we're coming 4-6 minutes for 45 seconds until 9pm when they too stopped.

This morning I had a huge mucous loss followed by intense contractions every 3-5 minutes. I went to hospital to be told I was 2-3cm, with 1 cm of cervix left to thin out. They sent me away. All day the contractions have been bad but have not got any more frequent than 5-6 minutes- then tonight I had another huge bloody mucous loss.but now everything has stopped again and I could just cry. I am exhausted and fed up.

I have a little boy (3) who I have had to have looked after since Saturday ;-( as I can't manage him and theses contractions... And also he needs to be looked after in case of night time rush to hospital.... But I am getting beyond frustrated and it's overwhelmed me today. Feeling very emotional

Can anyone offer me words of encouragement....

ChaffinchOfDoom Mon 10-Feb-14 20:35:30

it sounds imminent! good luck to you

have you got a birthing ball? have you tried any of the traditional stuff -
curry / fresh pineapple / sex ... do you know how long they'll let you go before inducing?

glorious Mon 10-Feb-14 20:38:42

Oh I'm really sorry, it is so tough. I had a long, long labour and I remember how awful I felt at times.

You will get there and you will be meeting your baby very soon. I've heard that often a long early labour can mean swift progress from later on, particularly with second babies. That was sort of the case for me (my first).

Is there something that would help you to do? I found a shower fantastic (bath not so much), and just rocking on all fours over a ball / leaning on the sofa and shutting my eyes. But everyone is different of course.

Have you managed to keep eating and drinking a bit?

Sending thanks

AndIFeedEmGunpowder Mon 10-Feb-14 20:39:11

You can do it! It won't be much longer now.

Do you think you can manage a sleep? Then you might wake up in the middle of the night to an imminent arrival!

varicoseveins Mon 10-Feb-14 20:40:28

No idea. They all seem quite relaxed about it.... I've got my term + 10 appt on Saturday & a community midwife appt on Thursday. I either want full blown labour or nothing at all- this hobbling on from day to day is torture...

My DS was born very efficiently within 12hrs of plug loss. Think that's what is making this seem so drawn out. Was spoilt with him & everyone tells me no2 is easier!!!!

Cluelessat30 Mon 10-Feb-14 20:43:02

Not much I can add really, just wanted to second hunching over a birthing ball/sofa/anything that's the right height. Helped me through childbirth.
You're already doing brilliantly to carry on!
brew for you, cbeebies for your eldest x

mayhew Mon 10-Feb-14 20:43:20

You are in the early stages of labour. You need rest, fluids, food, pain relief and distraction. The labour WILL get cracking and with all this preamble it will probably be speedy.

Ok, this is usually effective. Take some pain relief. I would recommend co-codamol. Get OH to buy it at the pharmacy if there is none in the house. Tell him not to mention you are pregnant, not because its dangerous but because they are often unwilling to sell pregnant women anything at all! We would give it to you if you were in hospital. Eat and drink something nice that is digestible, anything you fancy.

If you could consider it, some alcohol often calms these contractions for a while to give you a rest (see the sainted Ina May). One glass will not cause fetal alcohol syndrome.

If your tummy feels sore, heat might help eg a bath or a hot water bottle.
This baby will come out soon.

ajandjjmum Mon 10-Feb-14 20:43:51

Probably no help now, but you'll have forgotten all this soon, when you're holding that little bundle in your arms.

Do you know if you're having a DS or DD?

with ds2 I had this on and off thing. each time I was exhausted I sat down and the contractions stopped.

Midwife was firm but fair and said "well don't sit down then"
I danced him out - I turned on MTV and danced.

if someone has your little boy, sleep if you can then when rested get active.
For what it's worth once DS2 was on his way he was here within an hour.

varicoseveins Mon 10-Feb-14 20:48:28

Thank you glorious and gunpowder. Think the hormones and missing my DS1 are exaggerating everything. Am in bed now trying to switch off but it's easier said than done. I've tried walking but was in too much pain & a bath etc.. I'm trying to distract my mind by reading a crap book etc but not much is working. Just spoke to my mum (looking after DS) and cried like I was 5! She told me to get a grip get some sleep.

mynameisnotmichaelcaine Mon 10-Feb-14 20:50:15

You can do it. Dig deep, you're a strong woman.

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt Mon 10-Feb-14 20:53:50

{{hug}} I can feel the emotion and frustration in your post.

Remember that all of these tightenings and contractions ARE doing something, maybe they are dilating your cervix or maybe they are getting your baby into the perfect position. Either way they are bringing you closer to meeting each other.

Have a bloody good cry, a glass of wine, some comfort food and a deep warm bath. Give yourself permission to feel upset about this, you have every right to be. Then after that, you'll hopefully feel refreshed, positive and ready to face this birth.

I have a feeling that you'll go off like a rocket anytime soon and you'll be holding your newborn before you know it smile

MrsDeVere Mon 10-Feb-14 20:57:41

You ARE getting there.
You are doing brilliantly.

It took me till DC5 to discover the wonders of the birthing ball. You can sit down AND move at the same time.
It even allowed me to sit down whilst contracting. WTFlip did I not know this before!

The crying is normal too. I get really weepy in labour. My MW friend says she sees it all the time.

I clean a lot when in labour but I understand if that is not something you want to try smile

Come on girl! YOU CAN DO THIS flowers

varicoseveins Mon 10-Feb-14 21:00:13

I want to go off like a rocket! I am feeling a little calmer now. You're all really helping me. My poor OH doesn't know what to do so us giving me wide berth (sp?). A contracting, overdue, hormonal woman is enough to scare anyone.
This might be irrelevant but I'm leaking milk. What's that all about?

glorious Mon 10-Feb-14 21:01:38

A good cry is obligatory! I rang my mum (abroad! ) at 7am having said I didn't want anyone knowing I was in labour shock

If distraction is good maybe a film? Or I spent hours visualising a favourite walk and then what different parts of the baby might look like (e.g. nose, eyelashes).

varicoseveins Mon 10-Feb-14 21:03:00

I like the birthing ball- bounced DS1 out. MW told me this morning that 2-3cm and 1cm left to efface on cervix would be news if it was my first but as it's dc2 it could have been like that for weeks and could still be days. No wonder I'm not encouraged....

AndIFeedEmGunpowder Mon 10-Feb-14 21:06:37

YY to a glass of wine! Everyone in Ina May either has a glass of red wine or goes for a long country walk and has a surge against a tree. Wine is definitely the better option.

Just think OP, soon you will have a gorgeous snuggly newborn. envy

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt Mon 10-Feb-14 21:07:45

The leaking milk is another sign of your body's preparation for welcoming this baby.

I found visualisations really helpful. I'd lay on my bed and visualise myself in a calm and tranquil setting and then visualise the joy of meeting my baby for the first time. I would go into every detail possible, not of the birth, but of seeing them for the very first time - drinking every detail of them in. Doing this would help relax me but also give me confidence. But there again I can be a bit of an old hippy grin

I look forward to seeing your birth announcement smile

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt Mon 10-Feb-14 21:09:14

Lol at a surge against a tree!

I bloody love Ina May though.

varicoseveins Mon 10-Feb-14 21:15:08

Who/what is Ina May? Google search needed!

Stockhausen Mon 10-Feb-14 21:17:05

Good luck OP!!

I had a drawn out early Labour, but my actual recorded Labour was 5.5hrs

ChrisMooseMickey Mon 10-Feb-14 21:17:47

You are nearly there. I was like this for 3 weeks, but you are nearly there, just try and keep active if you can. And congratulations in advance smile

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt Mon 10-Feb-14 21:19:33

Ina May Gaskin is a MW in north America. Some would say she has quite hippy/psychedelic ideas, and admittedly some are a bit out there. But most of her advice is just common sense and what most of us would do but for the stupid things we are told by others, (your MW's comment being a classic hmm )

AndIFeedEmGunpowder Mon 10-Feb-14 21:25:13

Ina May's childbirth book on kindle

There are all these incredible birth stories and some quite graphic pics so don't read it on the tube like I did.

I think your baby is going to come sooner than you think OP.

varicoseveins Mon 10-Feb-14 21:29:20

Move it- I agree, just done quick bit of research. Don't think MW meant to discourage me but sometimes throw away comments like that are all u remember...

Tomorrow is another day... Positive, active day. May send DP to work, that'll def get things moving. DS1 at nursery for 2days now too so normal routine will make me feel better.

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