Because we're conditioned to think that home isn't safe (it is) and that hospital/MLU is the only place to have your baby. Homebirth still isn't presented as an option to many women - they have to broach the subject first
Thanks for the replies all, you've pretty much stated what I thought, just need to talk Dh around! It sounds so much nicer and relaxed at home. Still not sure what we'd do bout child care, my mum came and stayed with dd1 when we had dd2 and thought about doin the same this time too. The only positive I can think of about a MLU is the 'break' I'd get from hectic home life to bond with the baby and the bf support. Having said tht, it wld be lovely for dd's to meet their new brother or sister asap in their own home just makes me wonder y more ppl don't stay at home instead of goin to a MLU?!
I'd choose home. Guaranteed 1-to-1 midwife care, shorter transfer time in the event of complications and the bliss of your own bed afterwards. I had my second at home, on a plastic dust sheet with an old duvet over the top - all wrapped up & removed by midwife while I was in bath. As for other dc, I didn't want my dd in the house, so she went to friends, but if you want yours to stay at home, someone could look after them elsewhere in your house couldn't they?
- The mess from a hb - we wouldn't have the room for a pool
There's always room for a pool. Seriously. It can take a bit of imagination and a rearranging of the furniture but the tiniest room can accomodate one. But going to a MLU doesn't guarantee you a pool either.
- would better medical care be available in a MLU if there were any complications or wld a transfer to hospital be needed anyway? We wld b 10 mins from home to hospital or 50 mins MLU to hospital.
In both a MLU and Home, midwives are often better trained in order to spot things early in order to ensure there is time for transfers. However in a MLU your midwife is likely to be looking after other women as well as you, at a homebirth you have her full attention.
- what to do with other dc who are 5 + 3? Dh keen for them to stay at home but not see me in pain and dividing his attention
There is little they can do at the MLU regarding medical care or pain relief that you can't have at home. Complications would require transfer to a CLU from either. On that basis, I'd choose home over MLU every time. The mess is minimal and cleared up before the MWs go.
I planned a hb and still had alternative care for DD in case of transfer and so DH could focus on me, and I could relax in labour.
I'm currently 27+5 and booked in to go to the MLU 40mins away. I already have 2dc's which were both born at a MLU, 1st in the pool, very difficult back to back labour with gas and air, small tear and 1 night stay with Dh next to me. 2nd on all 4's on the bed (as the pool was already in use), really enjoyable, much quicker using hypno birthing, 2 night stay with lots of bf support. Both positive experiences and fairly straigt forward which has made me seriously consider a HB this time around. My main concerns are: - The mess from a hb - we wouldn't have the room for a pool - would better medical care be available in a MLU if there were any complications or wld a transfer to hospital be needed anyway? We wld b 10 mins from home to hospital or 50 mins MLU to hospital. - what to do with other dc who are 5 + 3? Dh keen for them to stay at home but not see me in pain and dividing his attention.
Have thoroughly read this really good thread bout HB http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/childbirth/1661721-To-home-birth-or-not-to-home-birth-Experiences-pls but most comparisons seem to be with home or hospital.
Pls share your thoughts and experiences to help me decide! Btw, cm is very pro HB too!