Best way to get labour unit midwife to believe I'm in labour

(38 Posts)
PogoBob Mon 24-Dec-12 23:51:22

Sorry if this is long - I'm probably worrying unnecessarily here and realise that every labour is different but grateful for any advice.

With DD my waters went at midnight, phoned the labour ward who said I could go in when my contractions were regular, no more than 5 minutes apart, lasting a minute and I couldn't talk through them.

That never happened, I could pretty much talk through all of them and they were anything from 2 - 7 minutes apart, lasting 20 - 40 seconds. However by 4am I had the most horrendous feeling of pressure in my bum (thought my pelvis was being split open!)

DH was getting worried at this point and rang the midwife who really didn't want to let me go in and he had to really argue the toss with them. We got there about 4:20 when I was asked a few questions, directed to a room and told they'd check me in a minute. They came back at 5am to discover I was 10cm and DD was born at 6am.

I have no complaints with the care, they were really busy and when they realised I was ready to push I had excellent attention.

I'm due again on Friday and I'm worried the same may happen again but even quicker! Is there anything that I can say to the midwife to get them to believe I need to go in that doesn't involve the frequency of the contractions or an inability to talk??

We're living with my inlaws at the moment so birthing a home really isn't on my wish list!

TIA

chatnickname2013 Wed 26-Dec-12 20:50:44

I HATE this bit and it's stressing me out too OP, they can't "assess" you by phone like they think they can. They really stressed me out with no1 which IMO contributed to poor pain control and cascade of interventions.. kept telling me I COULD talk when I was shaking my head and pushing the phone away because I COULDN'T, but according to them all first labours take a long time and I should just go to sleep - as if!

this time I'll just go in, and if I have to go away I will

emsyj Wed 26-Dec-12 23:08:42

I had the same issue last time: went in after waters broke, was told (incorrectly) that they hadn't broken, sent home just as contractions were starting. About 3.5 hours later I got DH to call and say we were coming back as my contractions didn't have any breaks between - they didn't want me to go in because I could still talk through contractions and it was the same shift of midwives so they remembered/knew I had only gone home a few hours earlier. They were very dismissive but it was quiet on the labour ward so they just said we could go in if we insisted.

I too am having 'precipitate labour' written on my notes - and fortunately in this area we have the pilot scheme of the One 2 One midwifery service, so I will have my assigned midwife (or a colleague if she's off duty) with me at home and I will be examined before I go in this time and accompanied on admission - so no arguing as they try to send me home without examining me (as they wanted to do last time).

If they don't take you seriously you might have to just ham it up a bit and pretend that it's worse than it is! grin

chatnickname2013 Wed 26-Dec-12 23:14:33

"they didn't want me to go in because I could still talk through contractions"

argh I hate this one size fits all assessment they do about you comming in! some women pace through the whole thing are still standing up when it comes to pushing!!!

poppy283 Wed 26-Dec-12 23:14:44

Agree with murtette - ham it up a bit!

chatnickname2013 Wed 26-Dec-12 23:15:38

sorry thought you said "walk" but same goes for talking!

SavoirFaire Wed 26-Dec-12 23:29:01

Have had 2 precipitate labours (although only just learned that word!). First 4 hrs, 2nd was 2.5 hrs and no pain at all until 30 mins before DD born, waters broke at last moment and no pain relief at all with both of them. Was very lucky to get to hospital with second - didn't occur to me to call hospital until I was on my way into hospital as was farting around sorting middle of night chid care for DC1 until we were in the car. Called from car and was told "you don't sound like you are in labour so expect to be sent home". I was a little smug when waters broke over same midwife 15 or so minutes later as I gave birth in the waiting area..... My advice would absolutely be to go in when you feel you are ready. Worst case scenario you will be sent home again. I hope all goes well for you.

SavoirFaire Wed 26-Dec-12 23:33:38

Have had 2 precipitate labours (although only just learned that word!). First 4 hrs, 2nd was 2.5 hrs and no pain at all until 30 mins before DD born, waters broke at last moment and no pain relief at all with both of them. Was very lucky to get to hospital with second - didn't occur to me to call hospital until I was on my way into hospital as was farting around sorting middle of night chid care for DC1 until we were in the car. Called from car and was told "you don't sound like you are in labour so expect to be sent home". I was a little smug when waters broke over same midwife 15 or so minutes later as I gave birth in the waiting area..... My advice would absolutely be to go in when you feel you are ready. Worst case scenario you will be sent home again. I hope all goes well for you.

ArkadyRose Wed 26-Dec-12 23:49:47

All three of mine have been precipitate labours - 4 hours for DD1, waters went as I got into the delivery suite & DD2 was born 15 minutes later, and with DD3 (planned homebirth for various reasons, including speed of previous labours) my OH called the MWs at 9am, waters went at 9:30am, DD3 was born 9:40am, MWs showed up at 9:50am. They didn't bother trying to argue - the moment OH said "It's on!" they rushed and still got here too late! This time around my notes have "PRECIPITIOUS LABOURS!!" in big letters all over them, so I don't think there'll be any arguments this time around either. grin

Alamaya Thu 27-Dec-12 00:41:00

deffo tell them your coming in.

DD i was induced and had a 57min labour
DS i rang them and told them the above and said they were 30 sec long every 2-3 mins. Was told take a bath eat something ring back if worse in a couple of hours blah blah crap. 10 min later i ring back as i feel my bag of waters. Within 45min my son was born at home luckily with ambulance crew just getting there. He was an unexpected footling breech with cord round neck. just 20min before he was born i was alone with my 18 month old.

skullcandy Thu 27-Dec-12 00:49:16

i had this with my 2nd dc. whole labour was less than 2hrs start to finish.. i called them to let them know and because i could talk they were like 'oh.. take your time'

it took me another hour to get there because i had to wait for parents to pick dc1 up.. dc2 arrived 15 minutes after i got to hospital!

ProtegeMoi Thu 27-Dec-12 01:21:45

Had 3 fast labours, 2 hours, then 27 mins with number 2 and number 3 was 16 minutes! All from first contraction to delivery. Luckliy I was induced each time so already at the hospital.

confuddledDOTcom Thu 27-Dec-12 02:29:36

I went into hospital on Monday night last week, was on the drugs to stop labour and from Thursday morning I was on my own with contractions, he'd come when he did. I knew all week I was still having contractions, but the monitor disagreed with me. About midday on Friday I noticed I was bleeding, still walking and talking fine. The MW called the doctor (first time I'd seen one despite spending a week on a delivery bed) who was actually just coming to discharge me because I wasn't having contractions, just irritable... She checked and I was 4cm, membranes bulging, head so far down it didn't show up on the scanner. They called my Mum to tell her she needed to come in (my husband is a panicker so I said to let her get him) they took about an hour to get to me, so about 2pm. I was still walking around, talking to Mum and DH. Probably about half past I said I needed to sit down, Mum saw me have my next contraction and pressed the button. Put back on the monitor, still only irritable. Not sure when I started pushing but after a couple of pushes baby deceled so she cut the bag and he was born in one push at 2:44.

If that doctor had sent me home I would have had no more warning that I was about to deliver because my plug had gone on Monday, my waters have never broken of their own accord (pretermers) so I would have BBA'd a 29 weeker and potentially lost him.

I know my births go like that and I said it all week, the MW actually asked Mum at one point if she thought I was close, she said she thought so but it would all happen at once when it did. So I always take things seriously. If I have any CTX from about 20 weeks I get them checked out (I've gone into labour at 23 weeks, fortunately they stopped it and I carried on a few weeks) and I don't care how often that means I go in, I always insist.

I have a rule when it comes to HCPs, I tell them what they want to know - what they want to know is that you can't talk through a CTX, so don't. What they want to know is they're every 3 minutes and last for a minute, so tell them that. It's not uncommon for things to calm down a little on the journey in, so if you're not exactly like you were on the phone they aren't going to question it. When you are examined tell them that your last labour was fast and you feel like you did at X time last time.

cbeebiesatemybrain Thu 27-Dec-12 12:58:53

This really annoys me! With dc1 I was told not to come in as I didn't sound like I was in labour, I was in a real panic and hadn't timed my ctx (which they knew I couldn't talk through) and I didn't know about the 3 in 10 rule. The mw was very dismissive and rude, waters had gone and I was scared but she still said no. Ds was born an hour later, very scary and traumatic (unnecessarily imo) and no apology when they realised their mistake. With dc2 I phoned as soon as ctx started and said they had been 2 mins apart for an hour and I had a fast labour with dc1. I had a ctx on the phone and really hammed it up so they sent a mw out (planned hb) and I was 5cm already.

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