Any day now I will be a grandfather for the first time - my daughter-in-law was due yesterday but no signs of labour yet.
I have noticed a dew discussions on here about health visitors. Having attended child abuse case conferences in a professional capacity I would advise anyone strongly against admitting a HV to their homes. My eldest daughter, now a doctor in paediatrics, shares my view on this.
HVs are far more concerned with carrying out surveillance on mothers and babies than giving any practical help or advice. They keep detailed records not just about the child, but they make assessments of the mother and father - their perceived competence as parents etc, the cleanliness of the home and anything else that catches their interest. If you try to see these records, they will obstruct you every step of the way. My son and D-i-L are clear that they will not be admitting the HV, or allowing her to see the baby - only the GP will be allowed to perform any checks.
I have seen suggestions that admitting HVs is compulsory. That's absolute nonsense - it isn't. A refusal to admit a HV will be noted - obviously - but that's all. Without plenty of other evidence, denied access would not be anywhere near enough to warrant interest from social services, let alone give them any powers. We had three children of our own and no HV ever crossed the threshold, nor were they allowed any access to our children. Once they realised we weren't going to change our minds, they left us lone.
Basically, if you let them in, they will open a file on you and it will contain a whole lot of stuff you will never see, yet which could be used against you should they ever wish to do so.
I've had some lousy advice from HVs in my time, but one absolutely saved my family from some realy nastiness, as well as being the only person who took seriously our concerns about our ds.
As a profession, I both angry with them and grateful. I guess like any other, there are good people and bad, and in many professions like theirs, cuts and constant reorganisation can mean that training as well as proper monitoring of conduct isn't as good as it probably should be.
my hv is a complete bitch she is like a miss hitler/obrien her words are gospel I questioned her opinion once and she threatened me saying "IF YOU DONT DO WHAT I TELL YOU I WILL MAKE YOUR LIFE VERY DIFFICULT" how is this helping me to be a good parent when I have advice that goes against everything I believe to be best for my child now . now I have to see many different child specialists putting my child through a lot of discomfort with blood tests ?? how does a blood test check a childs development and speech anyway??? I have been reffered to speech therapy , been discharged by speech therapy with no concerns, yet the hv refers me straight back again to supposedly help with development. we have been accused of child abuse but this has been dismissed as a mollitous attempt at causing me as a loving parent as much harassment as she possibly can . I have had the police family liason officers round to check our home , social services have been involved all with no further action .
SO HOW CAN YOU HV FRIENDLY MUPPETS THINK THESE HEALTH VISITORS ARE THERE TO HELP US NORMAL PEOPLE IN OUR NORMAL LIVES WHEN THEY WAIST OUR NHS MONEY ON POINTLESS CHECKUPS AND ASSESMENTS