Bad first delivery .. want c/section this time round

[jonquil]

Has anyone had a similar experience?

My first experience of childbirth was pretty awful. My waters broke early and then nothing happened so i had to be induced. To cut a long and very boring story short, short staffing at the hospital coupled with an inexperienced midwife meant after an hour and 10 minutes of pushing (after a long labour), an obstetrician just doing the rounds was concerned to see that my baby was pushing against my pelvis and her heart rate was going down. I was immediately taken to theatre for an emergency c section.

I am now pregnant again and petrified of going through labour again in case the same thing happens. I would like to have a c section. However, my midwife has said that i can't "just ask for a c section" and has referred me for counselling. I get the impression that this is the first in a series of hurdles designed to get me to cave in to having a natural birth.

I know there are so many women who think VBAC is the best thing ever, but i just don't want to do it. Does anyone have any advice?

thank you!

[Ladymuck]

Here is one thread on a similar vein. Here's another .

You will probably have to see a consultant, and if you definitely want a c/s you must ensure that you do so (I don't think m/ws by themselves can OK an elective). You are also entitled to a seocnd opinion if you don't like the approach of your consultant.

2 of my friends have had subsequent c/sections after traumatic births (neither of which ended had ened in c/s's as it happened).

[expatinscotland]

Demand to see a consultant and don't stop till you get in to see one. Don't be bullied into having a birth you don't want!

See your GP and enlist his/her help as well.

[Ladymuck]

Sorry my keyboard seems to be doing some strange things at present - I am not another persona of the cod really!

[milward]

Talk about it to your medical team. If what happened last time was sure not to happen again would you feel any differently? If you could have a doula with you or the same midwife if possible this could help. If you absolutly want a cs then just stick to asking for this - your feelings in this are important.

[northender]

There's another similar thread going at the moment which will have some useful stuff on for you. I also ended up having a cs after a lousy time, attempted induction etc. Second time around I had a real fear of the same thing happening again. My midwives were really supportive and although the consultant had a go at talking me out of another cs I stuck to my guns and had a wonderful elective cs and a totally different experience from first time around. Interestingly the surgeon said as soon as they opened me up that I'd made the right decision and things would likely have been the same as first time. Go with your gut feeling and good luck!

[jonquil]

Thank you everyone. That has given me some much needed support to stick to my guns. I'm glad i'm not going mad and that not everyone in the world thinks natural childbirth is the only option.

Will have a read of those other threads.

[morningpaper]

I've had a friend who has just had an elective and found it fantastic - relaxing (!) and calm and all in all very positive indeed. Good luck with your birth!

[jamboure]

jonquil

when you see your consultant tell them you opt for a section.

I had e/s with ds 1 and opted at 8 weeks pg with twins for another section they said you have the choice as i had a prev section

[seepypie]

hi jonquil, i too had emergency c/s first time round albeit in south africa and my next baby is due in about 4 weeks. i had decided after much research that VBAC was just not for me - mostly because of terrible care women get on the NHS when having babies. incidentally, friends of ours in croydon had their second baby and the baby's head was crowning before a midwife even saw them for the first time. you must just be very firm and show them you are not going to cave in just because its cheaper for the NHS if you have natural childbirth. i was given an appointment with a useless consultant who spent no more than 3 minutes on me, i told him and his assistant (who looked disgusted - not that I care) that I wanted an elective c/s this time round, no discussion. He agreed to it and didnt even try to change my mind or discuss it with me - whilst I was pleased with this, it just goes to show how little they care. Stick to your guns and just be firm. I doubt they would go against your wishes and run the risk of being sued. Sad how it all comes down to money. Good luck

[bonkerz]

Hi Jonquil, i too am in your position, sort of!

i had a natural birth 5 years ago when i had DS but it was hard work and very scary, ended up having ventouse delivery and stitches and not very good memories of my induction. All this i was told was due to the baby being too big for me to deliver naturally. He was 8lb 4oz.
Am now 21 weeks pregnant and have decided i want an elective ceasarian. Have consultant on wed and intend to push for this to happen. Looking back now i believe that i almost lost my son during child birth and as i have had 2 miscarriages before this baby i know emotionally i would not be able to cope if anything went wrong with this baby and also would dread having and emergency ceasarian.
I believe that its MY right to choose how i have my baby and i know myself well enough to make a decision like this. My DH is right behind me and im confident we will get what we want but i do think the hospital may make it hard!
Stick to your guns. It is your right.

[mummyoffour]

hi jonquil they say no two births are the same, but if you are really that scared of it happening again you really should demand it....I always say...its your body, your baby and your birth...so you should have the choice.

[jampots]

hi jonquil

my first experience was similar to yours, waters broke, nothing happened, 6 days later went into labour, 3 days later and after pushing for 4 hours dd was born by em c/s at 8lb9. I complained to hosp and along with a list of apologies they said if I returned to them for a subsequent delivery then I could if I wished have an elective c/s at 37 weeks. I did this although with a different consultant and ds was born by elective at 8lb12.

I would advise insisting on your delivery but explaining why you think you should be allowed to do this. Explain others' practices and your own fears.

[highlander]

get your wishes in writing, and make sure the letter goes in your notes. Once it's there, the midwife must refer you to the consultant. As an aside, the midwife, as a nurse, is your advocate. It's her job to stand by you and support you, whatever plan of care you go with.

[jonquil]

Thank you so much everyone. I have my appointment with the consultant midwife this afternoon. I have done a lot of research, read the NICE guidelines on c/section and actually don't see how they can refuse my request particularly since i had an emergency c/section before. My husband and I went through exactly what happened first time round last night in preparation, and he reminded me of all sorts of horrors which my memory had obviously completely erased. I will stand firm! Thanks for your support.

[hockeymum]

Can you tell me where to find the NICE guidelines jonquil? I cant find them on their website. I am in the same position as you, its early days yet at 4 1/2 weeks but I had such a bad time of it last time around 3 years ago and had an emergency c-section that I will definitely be requesting an elective this time around. How did your appointment yesterday go? I am prepared to fight for this elective section so any advice you have is most appreciated

[oliveoil]

I had a VBAC and it was great for me. However, my hospital at no time told me what I could and could not do, they advised me to try for a VBAC and I am glad I did. But if I had wanted an elective they would have bee supportive too.

How did your appointment go? Hope you didn't have to battle too much.

xx