My son is 16. He has been bullied/excluded from his social groups by one boy in his year who influencs the other kids. This boy comes from a an aggressive family and he attacked my son aged 12 in school, my son was hospitalised as a result of the attack. School were informed and school informed the boys parents, who responded with the boys dad pushing me over and threatening my dh with violence, they made nuisance phone calls and unwanted visits to our home. The police were not interested saying it was a school matter, school were not interested and avoided the subject of bullying when I tried to discuss it.
Gradually over time my son has just one friend left and has zero confidence, is still afraid of the boy and is intimidated daily by this boy. He chose college over sixth form as the boy chose sixth form. School are not interested in the bullying or attack.
My sons form tutor rang me up saying my son is quiet, withdrawn and has no confidence and is far too quiet and withdrawn and asked me to get him to our family doctor. I tried to mention the bullying but again this was tactically avoided by him.
I contacted the gp and the receptionist told me in front of my son, he was 16 and an adult so really mum doesn't need to be involved. I explained the schools concerns but she repeated he was an adult, she gave my son an appointment to see the gp, stressing it was his appointment and nothing to do with me.
My son went to the appointment alone, and came out saying he had discussed the bullying and it's effects, the gp had ruled out self harming and any other concerns and that he had recommended counselling which my son agreed to.
A week later we received a letter from camhs addressed to the parents of my son, saying camhs cannot help my son as he doesn't have one of the nine mental health conditions and as parents we are to arrange private counselling or try relate. The letter said if any professional remains concerned, they can refer him to camhs. This letter was addressed to the gp with us being copied in at the end of the letter.
The same week my son got a choose and book referal letter to make himself an appointment with p.a.s I believe. however as he is an adult he wants to do this himself but he can't understand how to book the appointment online himsel and refuses our help to try and book the appointment
Whenever I try to find out what's happening I am met with a stone wall saying he is an adult and they cannot tell me. Neither camhs or his gp will speak about the matter. They won't even explain the letter they sent me for the exact same reasons. I am not prying but my sons teacher rang me very concerned, I made the appointment and noone will tell me if everything is OK etc and what's happening..
Is he under camhs, googling I found that we as a family need to consent to this if he is, as our medical records need to be available to camhs and any other professional concerned including school. We haven't been approaced so has this been done without our knowledge?
I just want my son to get any help available and be involved only so that we can support him, especially as his gcse exams are weeks away.
Also a part of me is upset that we are going through this as a family whilst the bully and his family get to go about their lives without any involvement from any professional service, ie camhs or school. He didn't even get a detention for what he did to my son and we are going through this.
Sorry if this was a long, confusing rant I am worried about my son and school treat him as a child but the NHS regard him.as an adult and me a nosey overbearing mum. Has anyone got a clue where we are with this problem as I can't go back to school saying I rang the gp but I have no clue what is going on.
Thanks for getting this far and for any help you can offer me.
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Child mental health
Can anyone explain where we are ref camhs please?
12 replies
pieinthesky123 · 23/04/2015 11:10
OP posts:
NeedAScarfForMyGiraffe ·
23/04/2015 19:57
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