Carpark Scrape - I drove off...

(136 Posts)
MaryPoppinsMassiveSack Tue 16-Apr-13 19:59:46


Marginally late for the school run this morning I managed to touch the car parked next to me whilst maneuvering. I checked and there was very little damage / no dent and (being a bit late) I think no one saw.

So I drove off smartly.

But what if the school has cameras or someone did see, touching another car is just one of those things, isn't it?

difficultpickle Tue 16-Apr-13 20:01:48

I hope you are joking. If you are not then I hope you own up tomorrow by telling the school office. How would you like it if someone did that to you?

VivaLeBeaver Tue 16-Apr-13 20:02:57

Very little damage? So there was some? Even a small scrape can cost a couple of hundred £ if it needs a professional respray.

I've had this done to me twice.

I hope they do have CCTV. And no damaging another car isn't one of those things.

VivaLeBeaver Tue 16-Apr-13 20:03:44

And if they do have CCTV they might be able to get you done for leaving the scene without leaving your details.

hellhasnofurylikeahungrywoman Tue 16-Apr-13 20:03:51

My car still bears the brunt of some kind person like you.

Unbeknown to her DH saw her, took her reg and reported her. She had a knock on the door from the police later that night.

MaryPoppinsMassiveSack Tue 16-Apr-13 20:04:13

if someone did that to me it'd have to be a MAHOOSIVE dent for me to notice. The car's not in perfect condition...

StuffezLaYoni Tue 16-Apr-13 20:04:43

You obviously know you've done the wrong thing, or you wouldn't have posted this...

UnChartered Tue 16-Apr-13 20:05:02

that's ok then

as long as your car is fine hmm

YoniConnect Tue 16-Apr-13 20:05:05

I did this in a carpark the other week, and left a note on the windscreen. The car I scraped belonged to a student; he was so grateful. I would hate to find my car damaged with no note, so I wouldn't do this to someone else.

Wolfcub Tue 16-Apr-13 20:06:56

my car is a mess because of people lile you. when I accidentally very gently touched someone's nice new audi I admitted it even though polishing out the teeny tiny scuff put a 1200 charge on my insurance. sadly because no one admitted to doing this to my car I can't afford to get the dents and scratches on mine fixed. I hope you choose to do the right thing tomorrow

MaryPoppinsMassiveSack Tue 16-Apr-13 20:07:19

Viva - You 'hope the school has CCTV'. Nasty

DomesticCEO Tue 16-Apr-13 20:10:00

confused how is that nasty MaryPoppins???

SandStorm Tue 16-Apr-13 20:10:44

This happened to DH recently. Someone gave his car a 'little dent' in a car park and drove off leaving no details. No, it doesn't look much, but the insurance company have just authorised the repairs at a cost of £2k. Might not look much to you but the cost can be enormous. Please do the decent thing and own up to it.

VivaLeBeaver Tue 16-Apr-13 20:10:46

Not as nasty as driving off and leaving another car damaged.

Of course I hope they have CCTV. The other person deserves to find out who's damaged their car so they can bill you for any repairs. Really nothing nasty about that.

MaryPoppinsMassiveSack Tue 16-Apr-13 20:11:51

wolfcub - your insurance shot up by £1200! fuck that. I'm glad I drove off

Quak Tue 16-Apr-13 20:12:29

People are sooooo precious about their cars. I don't get it. I suppose if you had a brand new shiny car then the first scratch would annoy you but really, it's just a car. People's reaction to the tiniest of marks is so over the top that it would put me off owning up to it. I've got little scrapes on mine and have lost count the number of times a new one has appeared with no note. It doesn't bother me though. If someone had left a mark as you described and left a note I might contact them to say thanks for letting me know, but forget about it. I wouldn't feel particularly guilty op but I expect you are going to be made to feel it!

VivaLeBeaver Tue 16-Apr-13 20:12:59

But it's ok for the other person to have their insurance shoot up?

You really are a nasty person with no moral compass.

MaryPoppinsMassiveSack Tue 16-Apr-13 20:13:39

quak - good on you

Wolfcub Tue 16-Apr-13 20:14:26

No the cost of the repair to the insurance was 1200. Lets hope you're never in the position of the person whose car you scraped having to find that kind of money because someone said "fuck that I'm off"

I hope they do too... That isn't nasty - nasty is damaging someone's car and driving off!

In the last two months I've had a wing mirror smashed, my bumper scraped and a two panel scratch down the side. £400 worth of damage by people who just drove off.

There is NO excuse for driving off, it's disgusting and selfish behaviour and I truly hope you get caught.

Earlybird Tue 16-Apr-13 20:14:47

Is this a wind up?

Perfect way to get people going.....

I hope they have CCTV and I hope you get a knock on the door from a big burly copper. You have committed an offence.

LegArmpits Tue 16-Apr-13 20:15:15

I don't get why people are so precious about steaming hunks of metal e

I bumped a car in sainsburys once, and left my number at customer service desk. Unknown to me someone took my reg and reported me to the police and they would have prosecuted me for leaving the scene of an accident if I hadn't left details at the customer service desk. I was shock. It was barely even a mark, so glad I had done the right thing. You don't sound very nice to be honest, but you probably won't care what I think

MaryPoppinsMassiveSack Tue 16-Apr-13 20:16:11

nothing got smashed, there was a 2" scrape on the bumper which was shite where the paint was come off

hellhasnofurylikeahungrywoman Tue 16-Apr-13 20:16:20


How is it 'nasty' to hope the school has CCTV but OK to damage someone else's property without owning up to it?

MaryPoppinsMassiveSack Tue 16-Apr-13 20:16:30

not 'shite', white

LegArmpits Tue 16-Apr-13 20:16:36

...metal either. I just don't. A scrape on a car is just a scrape on a car. Surely life's too bloody short and precious to give a flying fuck?

Tell you what, I'll come round to your house later and accidentally break all your windows. And run away. And leave you to pick up the bill and sort out the hassle.

How about that?

MaryPoppinsMassiveSack Tue 16-Apr-13 20:18:00

freddie - how about you come round and knock over a milk bottle and run off, 'cos that's about as much damage as I caused.

Oh and mine is (well it bloody was!)shiny and I saved up for a very long time to buy it new, so yes I am precious about it because I went without a lot of things to have it so why should someone who doesn't value their car get to shrug at damaging mine?

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difficultpickle Tue 16-Apr-13 20:20:45

It is a criminal offence to leave the scene of an accident without exchanging details. You should either have left your details (and taken a photo with your phone to show that and also to record the damage for your own peace of mind) or you should have gone to the local police station to report it.

Have a look here if you don't believe me.

I really hope someone saw you and took your reg. It happened to me. My car was badly damaged in the station car park. A witness left her contact details and I was able to claim from the person's insurance (a woman driver who denied it until it was proven she was responsible).

DomesticCEO Tue 16-Apr-13 20:21:29

I knocked a car in a car park once, and went into the hall to track down the owner. It was quite a big scrape and we swapped details, etc but she never followed up on it. I don't think a lot of people are that precious about their cars, but I think owning up is the only fair thing to do and then leave it in their hands as to whether they pursue it or not.

marriedinwhiteagain Tue 16-Apr-13 20:21:30

I clipped a wing mirror a few months ago - mine was absolutely written off (wing mirror that is). I heard a pop and didn't realise until I was at the end of the road (100 yds on) with a queue of cars behind me. I dropped ds at school, drove right back, searched the parked cars for damage but could couldn't find any. Felt absolutely ghastly and absolutely terrified that I would be reported. I was hugely supported on here. But then I didn't notice damage and try not to deal with it. I think you need to speak to the school office tbs OP.

MrsSpagBol Tue 16-Apr-13 20:22:11

Legarmpits I don't think that is your decision to make. If you damage someone else's car I think you should let the owner be the judge of whether or not it's a big deal. If you don't think it is that is your right but some people do care about their posessions and there is nothing wrong with that.

MaryPoppins I don't understand you at all. You are abusing people for telling you what you did was wrong? Well why did you post then? You sound horrible, tbh.

Floggingmolly Tue 16-Apr-13 20:22:12

It's fine not to give a flying fuck when someone dents your car. Not fine to assume they'll feel the same way when you damage theirs.
Op, I'm another one who hopes you get done for this, both for the initial scarpering and the "I'm glad I drove off" when it was pointed out to you how much you potentially cost the owner of the other car.

MaryPoppinsMassiveSack Tue 16-Apr-13 20:24:25

Ok, I'm going to leave the thread as you are all riled up and will speak to the school in the morning. I think it was a teacher's car and it's not a state school so I'm sure the police will not be involved.

UnChartered Tue 16-Apr-13 20:26:01

don't hit the kerb on you way out grin

peanutbear Tue 16-Apr-13 20:26:08

My sister got arrested charged and given 10 points for this apparently it's the same code on your licence as a hit and run. And she didn't know she'd done it. No CCTV just a witness she was devastated paid for all the damage and apologised but the police still took her to court. Sorry

Ahhhcrap Tue 16-Apr-13 20:26:15

Why us it that just because you couldn't give a rats arse about your car you think it's ok to damage someone else's property.

That car you hit might be someone's pride and joy, or they may have scrimped and saved for years to buy it. And you damage it and drive off thinking its ok. People like you really get my back up!

I also hope the school has CCTV and you get a nice visit from the local constabulary - you did know its against the law to drive off from the scene if an accident, regardless ofhow minor you think it was!

MandragoraWurzelstock Tue 16-Apr-13 20:26:20

Very very common to bump a door against another car in modern, tiny car parks. I think if the damage is practically invisible and only noticeable through a magnifying glass, then honestly, the risk of someone taking advantage of your honesty is so great these days (I am sure people WAIT for someone to scratch their car so they can then fleece them for the full repaint) that I can understand someone not reporting every last teeny tiny bump. (talking about 2mm dot of paint sort of thing)
I wouldn't even notice that on my car.
I owned up to banging a car at preschool one day, it was a very tiny bump but still, it was my son's teacher's car - she didn't even want to look at it, she said don't worry. I was really relieved but would have paid up if she had wanted, not that there was anything really to notice.
2 inch white scratch sounds a bit more significant tbh
how new was the car? If very scratched up already then I wouldn't be too concerned - brand new and sparkling then well. Prob a bigger deal.

Whether or not it's a state school, as I and others already said, if you left the scene of an accident without leaving your details, you have committed a criminal offence.

I hope they throw the book at you.

difficultpickle Tue 16-Apr-13 20:27:38

OP it is a criminal offence wherever it happened.

VivaLeBeaver Tue 16-Apr-13 20:27:44

Scrapes down to the metal can be expensive to repair. If left un repaired they'll go rusty and rust spreads like mad. Sorry but my car cost a lot of money, maybe some people might not care about damage to something which is worth thousands of pounds but I do.

Op sounds like a troll or a twat with an attitude like she's displaying here.

culturemulcher Tue 16-Apr-13 20:27:45

A 2" scrape and you didn't leave a note? shock
I REALLY hope it wasn't my car you scraped.

A scraped colour coded bumper is a MINIMUM £75 repair IF it can be repaired. If it's not fixable (and not all scrapes are, it depends if it's scratched/damaged too) then it's around £600 for a replacement.

So you did a minimum of £75 worth of damage and you think that's ok because it was only 2"??

Yup, selfish.

BriansBrain Tue 16-Apr-13 20:28:38

I saw someone do exactly this and when I realised they weren't going to stop I took a picture of the car and reg on my phone. I then left my details on the damaged car and the owner was very grateful.

I hope someone managed to get your reg.

Chubfuddler Tue 16-Apr-13 20:28:58

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ZenNudist Tue 16-Apr-13 20:29:36

I might have to name change for agreeing with the OP.

If it was just a little mark I really wouldn't sweat it.

I have just got a shiny new (to me) car. I would be very unhappy if it got any significant dents or scrapes but wouldn't get shock over a mark that will buff out. if it did get slightly scraped I wouldn't claim on insurance. It's a car fgs! I'd claim for a big dent or scrape, but hopefully people would tell you about that. But maybe not!

If you have a white car it's inevitable that these things are going to happen.

Mind you when i was younger I had a really beaten up car & was a bad driver manoeuvring in tight car parks/ streets. I have been known to touch park & on one occasion scraped a white work van. It was my paint on the van & I figured it'd come out! blush

difficultpickle Tue 16-Apr-13 20:29:39

If it is in a private school car park then I would put good money on there being a CCTV camera. Fingers crossed you were caught on camera.

VivaLeBeaver Tue 16-Apr-13 20:30:20

It'll be up to the teacher if the police are involved or not. Private school is more likely to have CCTV as well.

So you can afford school fees but you can't afford to be an honest person and hold your hands up to your mistakes. Nice example you're setting your kids. If your kids damaged something in the house and didn't admit to it wouldn't you be mad with them for their dishonesty?

difficultpickle Tue 16-Apr-13 20:31:41

Zen if you have damaged another car and that damage is clearly visible, as is the case with the OP's, then it is a criminal offence to drive away without leaving details. That is the point here. Not the degree of damage and whether the OP thinks it is worth owning up or not. The law is very clear.

TheSecondComing Tue 16-Apr-13 20:32:17

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

difficultpickle Tue 16-Apr-13 20:33:15

Viva she is probably one of those parents with a huge sense of entitlement who thinks that paying school fees enables her to treat the teachers and others at the school as skivvies and lesser mortals than her.

MandragoraWurzelstock Tue 16-Apr-13 20:33:17

I realise that cars cost a lot but serious question - how do people deal with the knowledge that at some point, their car is really likely to sustain a few tiny scratches here and there? I mean park in any car park and you'll be too close for comfort to someone else's car. Surely it's time manufacturers made the finish a bit stronger on cars.

Also how on earth do people not scratch their OWN cars to buggery, or is that just me with my trip tips and roofing sheets smile

I take it your car isn't very new then? As presumably you damaged yours a little and appear not to mind? It wouldn't surprise me if the owner of the car looks at peoples bumpers for weeks to come, to try and figure out who did it. Even if there is no CCTV, they may still realise it was you, if they see damage on yours or the same colour paint as their scrape as there maybe transfer.

I'm now finding as mine is ten years old that people think it's ok to bang their doors into it as well, you know, it already has marks on it hmm (I've watched people bang their car door into it, in a supermarket and just shrug). Drives me mad. I now have rust in one scrape because I didn't have the money to fix it on my income and no one owned up. MY car maybe old but it should still be treated and driven with respect.

It's courtesy to leave a note if you damage a car and plain bad manners not to imo.

Floggingmolly Tue 16-Apr-13 20:33:46

Why would a private school be so reluctant to inform the police?
Leaving the scene of an accident is a police matter.

difficultpickle Tue 16-Apr-13 20:34:08

Chub may well be right but it is pretty pathetic if it is.

Someone did this to my car today and drove off.

It's ok though, my office does have CCTV and I will know tomorrow who did it. And I will report it.

I hope there's CCTV at the place where you scraped the car and you are prosecuted for leaving the scene of an accident.

I don't understand Chub's message. Am I being thick?

Chubfuddler Tue 16-Apr-13 20:37:35

Read it upwards

DamselWithADulcimer Tue 16-Apr-13 20:39:03

No, it's not 'just one of those things'. And you can't spell, OP. I'm not sure which is the greater crime.

Seriously, what a repulsive attitude.

Caoilainn Tue 16-Apr-13 20:39:13

What is with all the ads at the top of this page? I don't want to be 'in association with what car' and have a button that asks if I want to go to '' funnily enough that's where I though I was hmm

I have google adblocker so I see no ads grin

Thanks Chubfuddler. I think you're right.

WMittens Tue 16-Apr-13 20:40:24


People are sooooo precious about their cars. I don't get it.

My previous car cost me a year's wages; I scrimped and saved and sweated to earn that. Driving it gave me pleasure, just looking at it gave me pleasure, the way it sounded at full chat was superb; it made me feel good when I was at a very very low point in my life.

The last thing I want is some idiot with no spacial awareness putting a scrape on something that I put a lot of myself into, just because they have no empathy, nor respect for other people's property.

I don't care that you "don't get it", I don't "get" the need for fifty pairs of shoes, football, drinking alcohol and shitty soap operas - I don't piss on others' passions, and I expect people not to piss on my (pretty much only) passion in life.

MaryPoppinsMassiveSack Tue 16-Apr-13 20:44:14

Tantrumsandballons - I hope you don't work at Haberrdashers school and drive a silver 4x4!

BrevilleTron Tue 16-Apr-13 20:44:34

I AM precious about my car.

He is no longer made (Rover)
My grandad had him from new and did 67k in him
He was my wedding car
Two months later he was decorated as a funeral car.

I take him to the Pride of Longbridge show
He is my Grandads legacy to me.
I will keep him til the day he dies as he is part of my family and after 97k has developed his own personality.

I have to drive him, I have no other car.

That car you bumped could have someone who loves it as much as I love mine.

Bartlebee Tue 16-Apr-13 20:49:00

Assuming this isn't a wind up, I'm shocked that anyone would do this.

It's just about being a decent person, isn't it?

unlucky83 Tue 16-Apr-13 20:49:08

I think you should confess ...
but having said that I do think people are too precious about their cars - a minor scratch that hasn't broken the paint (so won't rust) is not the end of the world...I have one on mine where someone has obviously opened their car door into it ...(no note)
Years ago my DP managed to put a huge dent in the wing of my car..I was dithering about whether to get it fixed or not ...
It stayed like that for a couple of months - then someone bumped into it on my work car park (good few hundred people work there -little chance I would have found out who'd done it) - they sent an e-mail round to trace the owner. They had made the dent a bit worse so would have caused the same amount of damage ...but they had been honest -so I was too ....and left it (dent was still there 8 years later when I sold it on - didn't look great but never caused a problem)...
If I had found out cos someone saw them do it (unlikely) ...I wouldn't have been so honest...
Finally insurance repairs - are so expensive just cos the insurance companies are paying ...DP (worst driver in the world) backed into a car (private parking area, 2am just finishing work, dark, unlit, normally empty then, other car shouldn't have been parked there) - DP got a quote for repair to his car from insurance company repairer - £700 - went to local body shop and had it done there for £120 - (less than his £250 excess...) -other party claimed £6000 for their repair hmm -this is backing round a corner on a car park - how hard could the impact have been???

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VivaLeBeaver Tue 16-Apr-13 21:00:04

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MrsOakenshield Tue 16-Apr-13 21:17:22

so, you won't mind if I send a link to this thread to Habs Boys and Girls (as you don't specify which) so that the school can follow this up?

Do you suppose that a teacher wouldn't take this up with you because you are a fee-paying parent?

Chubfuddler Tue 16-Apr-13 21:25:47

It's totally OK to knock into cars in private school car parks, dontchaknow. If I can't find a space I regularly side swipe ds's teacher's car out of my way. She always smiles and tugs her forelock, as she should.

pooka Tue 16-Apr-13 21:27:41

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JulieMumsnet (MNHQ) Tue 16-Apr-13 21:31:46


We'd like to remind you of our fabulous Talk guidelines

Ah I missed the part about the private, fee paying school.

Of course it's ok to scrape the teachers car, after all you pay their wages don't you?

Silly me. Mine go to a state school you see. We don't tend to give up being decent people along with the school fees. Luckily enough, most parents at private schools don't either. But I suppose there always has to be one.

WMittens Tue 16-Apr-13 22:20:26


"...a minor scratch that hasn't broken the paint (so won't rust) is not the end of the world..."

What about a deep scratch on a Jaguar XJ or an Audi A8? They're aluminium bodied, so not going to rust - does that make a deep scratch OK?

Some kind sole took the wing mirror off my car today. It's ok, it's only about £250 for a replacement, the DCs will get new shoes eventually.

Own up op it's the right thing to do.

unlucky83 Tue 16-Apr-13 23:47:01

WMittens My first sentence was 'I think you should confess' -
I would confess and neither I nor my children open doors into peoples cars etc..we do respect other people's property....
However a deep scratch wouldn't be the end of the world on my car (and it isn't aluminum) -I would be a little miffed but only a little because it is a box for getting from A to B and it will still perform that function...
I have had my wing mirror smashed whilst parked on the road - more than once - which upset me more because it is something you HAVE to fix - then again I have a 'sensible' car so these things aren't that expensive...(and I wouldn't claim for that on my insurance...)
(BTW Babylon sad- is it a whole new mirror (hanging off) ? -or just the glass - you can get a mirror that sticks over the broken one from places like Halfrauds for less than £10 IIRC- I've done that once and it worked fine...before someone then tried to knock it off completely ... and (depending on your car) you might be able to get one from a scrap yard/or not manufacturers original for a lot less than for your main dealer and get a local garage to fit (or do it yourself - not v. difficult)

Each to their own etc but...personally I really can't get my head around why people spend a fortune on any car - I'd much rather keep my money in the bank - even earning the current rubbish 2% interest - so that hopefully my children can buy somewhere to live without a mortgage and never have to worry about money ...or even just have a good holiday - rather than buy something that has halved in value as soon as you drive it out the showroom..unless of course you have more than enough money ....
I think the adage if you can't keep it safe and can't afford to lose it - you shouldn't have got it in the first place...applies...
If you have a precious classic car etc - just for fun/ playing with at the weekend - then don't leave it unattended in a public place where it could get damaged - it could easily happen and there are some not very nice people out there - and especially not if you are going to get really upset by that because you really feel it in your pocket to sort it out ...

chickydoo Tue 16-Apr-13 23:51:19

I knocked a cars wing mirror off in the school car park, I felt dreadful! Left a note, and my details with the school.
The woman concerned was so glad I had owned up to it, she said she could never had afforded to get it fixed. It cost me £80, was my fault so I paid the price... That's life.

featherbag Wed 17-Apr-13 08:04:18

OP I sincerely hope a police officer turns up to arrest you for leaving the scene of an accident. You are a criminal and I hope your private school manages to teach your children some morals, as it appears unlikely you'll bother/be able to do so.

MaryPoppinsMassiveSack Wed 17-Apr-13 08:57:22

Ok, I survived the night with no police roundup. So that was nice. Today I shall be speaking to the school. Thanks for worrying me uneccesarily about the police at my door mn. I'm now tired and scared.

austenozzy Wed 17-Apr-13 09:02:08

yes, it's all the fault of an anonymous online forum, 98% of which said you're culpable for a minor criminal act.

featherbag Wed 17-Apr-13 09:07:39

It was far from unnecessary, the police turning up was a very real potential consequence of what you did. Hopefully you'll think twice before behaving in such a dishonest and reprehensible manner again.

Caitycat Wed 17-Apr-13 09:24:21

Glad you are owning up! My sister when she was young and scared damaged someone's car in a Sainsbury's carpark. She drove off in a panic, realised what she had done and then drove back to look for the car but couldn't find it. She got a letter from the police two months after the event so just because noone came to your door last night doesn't mean noone will but reporting it should mean they will call off the feds!

MandragoraWurzelstock Wed 17-Apr-13 09:34:56

I think some of you are enjoying this a bit too much!! smile

OP, I hope you manage to sort it out. I agree that your approach of 'did anyone see' was a bit misguided, I think you realise now that it's something that affects other people. But I am sorry you had a rubbish night.

often it pays to speak up when something happens, people sometimes respond well to honesty - good luck.

WMittens Wed 17-Apr-13 13:26:19

I think the adage if you can't keep it safe and can't afford to lose it - you shouldn't have got it in the first place...applies...

Personally I go by, "respect other people's property".

"Don't leave it unattended in a public place" - I should be able to park in a supermarket carpark, do a bit of shopping and return to my car without it having a fuck off great scratch down the side because someone else doesn't "get" my interests.

difficultpickle Wed 17-Apr-13 13:31:10

OP your worry was completely self inflicted. If you had done what you should have done then you would have had nothing to worry about at all. I assume you won't bother owning up in RL unless someone has actually seen you do it and reported it. If you had any intention you would have dealt with this properly at the time.

MandragoraWurzelstock Wed 17-Apr-13 13:34:11

I agreewith you there WM. The thing is t hough, which I can't understand, is that cars DO get bumped - it's so common - yet people still appear to be so attached to their vehicle that they get very upset by this.
If you're going to drive a very heavy, very powerful metal box around on the same roads as thousands of other metal boxes, all with rather fragile paintwork, and a good few proper eejits among them too - isn't it a bit like setting yourself up for misery? Surely it's going to happen at some point.

Not saying you shouldn't love your car and I hate it if people are really dishonest - it's their fault not yours - but can you see what I'm getting at?

Why are cars not made a bit more robust, to start with (is it a weight issue) and why not anticipate that they will get a bit bashed on occasion, and adjust your thinking so it doesn't make you so angry?

Fragglewump Wed 17-Apr-13 13:35:32

Wtf??? I would be boiling mad if someone scraped my car then buggered off!!!! How horrible!! Own up and don't be so spineless!

MandragoraWurzelstock Wed 17-Apr-13 13:36:30

fwiw I am a bit upset that our car has so many scratches INside it. I don't know why they're not made to cope with carrying things like wood, and having dirty children in them. I want a car you can hose out. Not rubbish plasticky fascia and nylon carpet you can't get stuff out of.

cheesesarnie Wed 17-Apr-13 13:43:55

I got really upset when someone did this to my car.
It isn't the best looking shiniest car but I brought it myself! after i left dh i brought my car, the first that belonged to just me and no one else. i sorted tax, mot and insurance for the first time ever and then someone scrapped it! i was so upset! obviously i had bigger things going on but it was the principle!

well done for doing the right thing in the end though op.

WMittens Wed 17-Apr-13 13:44:44 DO get bumped - it's so common - yet people still appear to be so attached to their vehicle that they get very upset by this.

That is true, but it is because the eejits don't give enough of a stuff that it is common; if the drivers who don't take care, took care, then bumps would not be so common. So I don't see me being at fault for caring, I see them at fault for not caring.

In honesty I don't give a shit that they don't give a shit about their cars, that's their prerogative (and I own/have owned/kept cars that I didn't give a shit about), but I always give a shit about other people's property, and respect them and their choices.

If I did make a mistake and damage someone's car I would own up, I wouldn't dream of doing anything else, and I'm glad to see the OP has had a change of heart.

unlucky83 Wed 17-Apr-13 13:47:36

WMittens - I said (again) I would confess and I do respect other people's property -but lots of people don't...

If you left a £50 note on a park bench - some people (me included) would hand it in to the police -other people wouldn't - that's life...
If it was mine I would think I was lucky that someone handed it in and I should have kept it safe...been more careful.

Of course in a perfect world you should be able to leave your car where you like ...but this is the real world - my solution - get a car that you don't have to worry about...less stress...and if you want a 'special' car accept that you have to take special care of it...and not leave it in a supermarket carpark ...

WMittens Wed 17-Apr-13 13:52:45

Why are cars not made a bit more robust, to start with (is it a weight issue)

I don't know why they're not made to cope with carrying things like wood, and having dirty children in them.

Cars are very robust (and very heavy) and it's mostly due to safety legislation. However, body panels are often there to absorb the shock so it isn't transmitted to the occupants.

Aside from that, it comes down to cost - paint quality varies from manufacturer to manufacturer, but in any case if something is harder than the paint (or rather, the clearcoat) it is going to come off worse - so a metal screwdriver beats paint, paint beats soft plastic, etc. etc.

WIth regards to interiors, it comes down to demand - you can by a completely utilitarian vehicle that you can hose out, etc. - it's called a Ford Transit Double Cab. No one really wants a vehicle that basic, they want comfort and an appropriate level of (perceived) quality for what they've paid. There may be a solution that covers both, but it would cost so much no one would buy it.

WMittens Wed 17-Apr-13 14:00:58

and if you want a 'special' car accept that you have to take special care of it

I do take special care of it; leaving it in a car park (the clue's in the name) is not an unreasonable thing to do with a car. I have successfully avoided Mercedes, Porsches, and even a Ferrari, along with every other car; is it so difficult?

I understand perfectly that accidents happen, and that is not my issue; my issue is the attitude of, "oh well nevermind, it's only a box on wheels," or, "well you shouldn't have such an expensive car." It is selfish and inconsiderate, maybe slightly jealous and shows a childish lack of responsibility - mistakes get made, no problem - own up to the fact that you* may be wrong.

*The royal 'you'

MandragoraWurzelstock Wed 17-Apr-13 14:12:13

I agree that people should own up if the damage is more than very tiny.

Thanks for the tip about first car was in fact a LWB 4 litre 1971 transit, so looking back you're right.

I am seriously thinking of getting another smile

MrsSpagBol Wed 17-Apr-13 14:14:23

^ what WM Mittens said.

unlucky83 Wed 17-Apr-13 14:39:12

I don't think (on the whole) people target flash cars .. (except maybe those who park in the middle of two spaces - there is a website with pics of lots of those -has a rude name) ..these things happen to all cars ...
My first car, a Fiesta bought second hand had to borrow money from my dad to get..within a week left parked on a street came back and someone had put a huge dent in it...instantly knocked a few hundred off the value...was really upset (mainly cos I couldn't really afford it!) But also realised it is only a car...
Same car - just a few egs - someone deliberately pulled the aerial up and snapped it off ... someone put a drill in the keyhole ...found the roof stoved in - someone (drunken student??? - on a Uni carpark overnight on a Fri) must have climbed on the roof -(pushed it up from inside and it was fine)..these things happened in one of the lowest and highest car insurance areas in UK...
Waves on a beach - don't let it worry me ...and I like it when my car gets to a certain age -cos you can use it like a van with no worries...and as long as you look after the engine etc -regular servicing - it starts and runs fine -a few scrapes doesn't really affect the value...

Jealous? I think that might be a problem for some (again comes back to keeping it safe) also I personally think (and IME) people with flash cars are a bit insecure .. but then if it makes them feel better...good for them I knew someone with a E- type Jag - nice ride - but they couldn't afford to put fuel in it -so what was the point??)

MaryPoppinsMassiveSack Wed 17-Apr-13 20:49:19

Thanks to some of you for the fairly positive responses, after all, it is only a car.

Unlucky ^ - it does sound like your name is quite appropriate, so far as cars go.

And regarding my poor spelling and grammar, well, I'd like to see how your Swedish stands up to investigation.

Today I DID go to the school, but having a good scout around the carpark area I concluded that the CCTV will not seen the contact between the cars and so I have intent to sleep soundly tonight.

Goodnight MN, sleep well

VivaLeBeaver Wed 17-Apr-13 20:53:15

that cars DO get bumped - it's so common

Maybe if you're a shit driver you think it's common if you keep doing it but for most people its not the case. I've been driving over 20 years and have managed to never bump someone's car. If you're a good or even reasonable driver there's no reason why you should bump another car. After all cars are fairly big things and easy to see so I don't understand how people drive into them.

difficultpickle Wed 17-Apr-13 21:08:51

Ha ha how funny. I love how you said that you were going to go into the school today and some people interpreted that as you going to acknowledge what you did. Why am I not surprised that you only went to see if you had been caught? I'm really hoping that another parent saw you and you will be hearing from the school in the next few days. I would have no hesitation reporting you to the police.

cheesesarnie Wed 17-Apr-13 21:59:23

so you went to check if you'd be caught rather than to report it?

difficultpickle Wed 17-Apr-13 22:06:16

When it happened to me it was many days before the woman that did it was tracked down and many months before the police made their decision whether to prosecute.

Floggingmolly Wed 17-Apr-13 22:06:47

What happened to "today I shall be speaking to the school", then? hmm

YoniOrNotYoni Wed 17-Apr-13 22:13:52

Did anyone send the thread to Habberdashers? I mean, I presume it's not the real school, but worth asking.

(So speaks a teacher who has had this happen to ne twice, but always left my details when I've bumped another car)

MaryPoppinsMassiveSack Wed 17-Apr-13 22:39:36

I didn't ever say that the incident happened at Habs.

difficultpickle Wed 17-Apr-13 23:13:03

Yes you did, even if you can't spell

Tantrumsandballons - I hope you don't work at Haberrdashers school and drive a silver 4x4!

difficultpickle Wed 17-Apr-13 23:14:11

Maybe it would be worth emailing the school a link to this thread.

gomummygoes Wed 17-Apr-13 23:59:10

I don't have particularly great vehicles but expect respect for my property regardless. When someone did what you did to my car, and didn't leave a note, it wasn't caught on CCTV either. But I found the lack of a note so disrespectful that I spent many hours canvassing and eventually found two people who not only witnessed it from the cafe beside the lot, but one of them knew who the driver was. (Small towns are great.)

Was THAT man was surprised when I showed up at his office, to personally let him know that I had reported it! Why did I go to his office? Well, I thought it was funny to make sure his entire office heard, since he owned an automobile insurance company.

Funnier still that he then offered to pay cash for the damage so that it wouldn't affect his insurance!

Just sayin'....cctv may not have caught you, but a truly annoyed owner just might.

MandragoraWurzelstock Thu 18-Apr-13 07:51:46

Crikey, I take it all back. OP is clearly only concerned with being caught. Very poor attitude.

Viva - I've driven since 1995 (including a break for a few years, granted) and have never had an accident involving another vehicle. I did once back into a small tree at about 2 mph while reversing and trying to break up a fight in the back seat...

what I'm talking about is the little tiny bumps that happen with doors in car parks. That's not what happened with the OP I know, but there are always threads on here about car park door situations. That's what I meant by common iyswim.

This is partly why P&C spaces are so important, imo.

SoupDragon Thu 18-Apr-13 07:58:09

You might want to consider getting yourself some driving lessons, OP.

Do they do morality lessons too?

MaryPoppinsMassiveSack Thu 18-Apr-13 08:47:57

After all the tales of woe on here about huge costs of repairs and massive insurance hikes I took the decision, based solely on what MN had told me, NOT to come clean. I cannot afford some crazy insurance claim, just to appease some angry internet hounds. I'd rather continue to feed my dcs than tidy up some snotty cow's fancy car. Also, the cost and likelyhood of getting caught by the police is negligible. I'll take my chances. I'm pretty sure police in herts have many more important jobs than chasing me. I'm like Penelope pitstop, and you are all dick

MaryPoppinsMassiveSack Thu 18-Apr-13 08:48:49

Dick Dastardly

OrangeFootedScrubfowl Thu 18-Apr-13 08:56:03

I think I scraped a car in a car park this week actually. But children were shouting at the time and I didn't hear or feel it. I only saw it the next day and remembered everything being too close. Or maybe someone scraped me? I don't know!
It was at the dentist. Should I ring them?

MandragoraWurzelstock Thu 18-Apr-13 08:59:36

was Penelope Pitstop delusional?

MaryPoppinsMassiveSack Thu 18-Apr-13 09:09:29

LOL I'm a dentist!

IAmJacksRagingBileDuct Thu 18-Apr-13 09:15:26

Nothing new to add but OP I am really shocked at your selfishness. What makes the owner a "Snotty cow"?

Tbh you're clearly on a wind up so I don't know why I bothered typing any of that.

SoupDragon Thu 18-Apr-13 09:26:04

After all the tales of woe on here about huge costs of repairs and massive insurance hikes I took the decision, based solely on what MN had told me, NOT to come clean.

So it's ok to pass those "huge costs" onto the owner who has done nothing wrong? confused

SoupDragon Thu 18-Apr-13 09:27:56

The only snotty cow in this isn't the owner of the parked car you damaged.

TheChaoGoesMu Thu 18-Apr-13 09:48:25

You wind up troll op. Penelope Pitstop my arse. Enjoying yourself are you?

lljkk Thu 18-Apr-13 10:52:42

If OP has child at Habs then she can afford to pay to repair a minor scrape, no? confused

I am on fence wrt OP's story. I have left notes on cars when I slightly scraped them and other party always brushed it off, said they weren't bothered. I also seem to mangle my own car about once every 10 yrs (am overdue for that, now, <<twitch>>). If someone scraped our big banger I probably wouldn't notice; scrape my newer little car and I might cry.

Percephone Thu 18-Apr-13 14:22:57

So a Swedish dentist who has children at Haberdasher's school scraped a silver 4x4 in the car park, which likely belongs to a teacher.

I do hope no one sends them an email, because you have more or less identified yourself!

Percephone Thu 18-Apr-13 14:26:23

That is, unless this is all a load of bollocks.

WMittens Thu 18-Apr-13 19:00:59

Yup, definitely a troll.

Well - in case this is a real thread, I have to say I agree with those who say that MaryPoppinsMassiveSack should own up. However, it is clear that she is too selfish to do so. I think that leaving the repair costs for the other driver to bear shows her lack of decency - though I am sure she will come back and tell us what a wonderfully charitable and altruistic person she is, and how unfair it is to judge her on one incident. hmm

Of course, we aren't judging her on one incident - but on her reaction to it. What I find especially nasty is her referring to the driver of the other car as a snotty cow, when she has done nothing wrong at all - the OP, however.....

I have twice damaged someone else's car in a car park, and both times I found the driver of the other car, and gave them my details, and we paid for the repairs to their cars. It was just the right thing to do. The first time it happened, I was in the gym car park, and scraped the side of another car. I went back I to the gym and got paper and pen to leave a note with my details, but then decided to wait in my car until the driver came back - it was an elderly man, who was lovely to me - I was almost in tears at what I'd done. He even sent me a bouquet after the repairs were done.

MaryPoppins - for me it is about honesty. If I hadn't owned up, I would have felt dishonest, and it would have weighed on my conscience. I think what you did is dishonest, but clearly you have lower standards in this area.

Oh - and of course you won't be complaining if this ever happens to you which would be beautiful karma.

difficultpickle Thu 18-Apr-13 21:52:24

snotty cow? You said you thought it was a teacher's car. Why send your child to a school where you clearly don't respect the teachers?

MaryPoppinsMassiveSack Thu 25-Apr-13 12:44:44

So I'm back, both on the forum and in the country. No developments to report on the scratched car situation, however...

Upon my return, I am finding a cheeky little post it note on my windscreen with "ho ho MaryP" and a smiley face. I'm assuming one of you knows who I am though as I've heard nothing from the school I thank you for keeping your silence ;-)

Maybe we could do cake sometime? Or does the Scandic Troll have her own little troll?

EasterHoliday Thu 25-Apr-13 12:52:11

someone did this to DH's car when we were on holidy in Devon last year. Stupidly, he did it right in front of a pub with drinkers sitting outside who took his licence reg and provided statements. He's just been convicted of a couple of offences, been fined £500, given 6 points on his licence, a small costs award against him and his insurance has paid for the damage.

I also know someone whose boyfriend did 6 weeks in an open prison for driving off after a scrape and then compounding it by lying about who was driving because the driver was uninsured.

so the moral is, be as smug as you like Ms Poppins, because Karma can take a few months to work her magic.

MarthasHarbour Thu 25-Apr-13 12:58:16


MaryPoppinsMassiveSack Thu 25-Apr-13 13:27:48

^^ smug? Not being smug (had to google that, thanks for expanding my vocab) just an update as i am having so many negative comments.

Are you at all ashamed for damaging someone else's car, and leaving her to pay for it, when you could have done the decent thing and own up? Or are you happy that you have got away with it? If it is the latter, then I do think you are being smug.

dickensonmills Wed 29-Oct-14 06:08:45

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

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