My father has been diagnosed with terminal cancer, and he probably has only around 2-3 months to live. He is very aware of his diagnosis and he tells me he is trying to be philasophical about this, given he is 78, and feels he has had a "good innings" as he put it. The problem is this:
My mum and him are not seeing eye to eye on where he should be buried. On the one hand, my father wants to be laid to rest in his hometown in the NE of england, but my mother (who wants to be buried beside him when her time comes) want to be laid to rest down south because their children (inc. me) and grandchildren are there. She was planning to move down south after my dad's retirement, although he wanted to stay up north, but I guess my dad's terminal condition has answered that one . i.e he will spend the rest of his days up north as he always wanted. However, this difference of opinion between my parents is now spilling over into where they should be laid to rest.
I am going up north to see him this weekend, and want to approach the subject with my father alone, about where he wants to be laid to rest, because I want to respect his wishes. My problems are:
- How do I bring up the subject of burial in a terminally ill man?
- How can I persuade either my dad to be laid to rest down south so that we can all pay him much more regulkar visits when he is gone, or......how do I persuade my mum to respect my father's wishes of being buried up north where they are now (my mum won't like this idea, because she wants to leave the north east when he has gone and start a new life down south to be near us - she doesn't want to be up there all alone).
Any words of advice/wisdom would be utmost appreciated.