Re sitting in the back next to DC in car seat -

[herecomesthsun]

We have a DC aged 3 y 8m. Since he was a baby, if we go out as a family, we usually have one parent sitting in the back with him to keep him company/ make sure he is ok. We have DC2 due next month and will need 2 car seats, obvious place being both in the back of the car. We like rear facing and have a rear-facing Two Way elite in situ currently. It is going to be very difficult to squeeze a parent in the back past the car seats! I wondered whether anyone else has preferred having an adult with the children and whether you have managed to organise your car seats accordingly?

[Gigondas]

We do but they aren't both rear facing . Bought a Vw sharan to
Cope

[Seona1973]

we never have an adult in the back. Kids in the back, adults in the front

[Tigresswoods]

Have you seen the PFB thread in Parenting?

[wonkylegs]

Whilst they are rear facing you could try getting one of these .... www.bonnybabies.com/bearviewmirror.htm we had them it means you can see their faces whilst you are driving and that gives you and them some reassurance without physically being in the back.
I mostly drive with just me & DS and preferred for safety him being in the back but this really helped to gauge what was actually going in rather than just relying on listening.
He is front facing these days but he still loves the teddy mirror and won't let me remove it from the car!

[ShatnersBassoon]

Unless you drive a stretch limo, there's no reason why someone in the front can't see and reach the passengers in the rear seats. You don't need to be sat in the back to be able to talk to them and pass them things they need.

What do you do when only one of you parents is taking the children somewhere? Do you put the child in the front passenger seat to keep them company?

[herecomesthsun]

Well, it has worked for us so far (and Britax also recommend having an adult with the child as a safety measure so it is something other informed people evidently think is a good idea too). Obviously if there is only one person driving, you do the best you can, but if we are going as a family on any significant length of journey it has worked quite well up till now. May no longer be practical though.

Perhaps Shat and Tigress you could save your comments for helpful and thoughtful ones?

[ShatnersBassoon]

I think it is fairly helpful to point out that it's fine to sit in the front if it will be more comfortable and convenient for you to do that. You don't need to sit in the back.

It's not Shat, by the way.

[friendswithbenefits]

What would you do if you were in the car on your own is a perfectly valid question.

And causing anyone "Shat" even if it is a possible shortening of their NN is offensive. It just is.

And you are being PFB - sorry but you are.

If I was in your shoes I would accept that the kids have to go in the back together and that the older one will be able to amuse the younger one - also he's going to be 3yrs9mths when the baby arrives, he's not a teeny himself, so the risk of hitting/biting should be lessened. And he might like to feel that he has an important job of looking out for the younger one?

[friendswithbenefits]

BTW in my car it was always adults in the front, kids in the back.

[woollyideas]

I thought PFB on reading this, gave OP the benefit of the doubt, and then read the response to 'Shat' (how rude!) and Tigress and had my PFB suspicions confirmed.

FGS. Kids in the back. Adults in the back.

[woollyideas]

Adults in the front, obviously! Duh!

[ANTagony]

Its each to their own and neither way is wrong so its not worth offending others for their choice . Personally, I don't know a single parent that sits in the back with their children unless their are three adults traveling.

But it is your choice.

One other option could be to sit one of the children in their rear facing seat in the front with the airbag off. This way the adult passenger could sit behind one of them, so see them clearly and alongside the other. Don't know how you feel about a child in the front though.

[herecomesthsun]

Well given that I am having my second child and this is what is causing the problem, it is by definition a "Precious second born" problem isn't it?

Apologies to Shatner'sBassoon, I had the impression of people being rather rude for no good reason, and I guess I wasn't careful enough in response. So it was polite of SB to make snide remarks about a stretch limo was it?

I am prob going to have to put them both in the back, but have apocryphal family story of uncle aged around 2-3 trying to hit mother with a hammer whie she slept as a new born, so would prob prefer to have adult in back on long journeys. Not to mention small vehicles being thrown/ accidents/ trying to deal with crying baby etcetc.

Also space for second adult in front is reduced because of rear facing 2 way eite.

Would not want to turn off airbag in front and also could only put 2 way elite in front facing forwards which defeats purpose of buying it.

This is in a way a very privileged problem in that I can afford the luxury of a rear facing car set, I will often be in the rathe lucky position of having DH with me over mat leave so we will have 2 adults in car and we are not a single parent family, both quite involved hands-on parents etc. But not actually PFB!

[WhereTheWildThingsWere]

Christ, I would go mental stuck in the back with the kids, have never done it.

They will be fine, check the back seat for hammers, knives, saws etc before driving off and all will me dandy

[notfarmingatthemo]

When our dd was small. We sometimes had a third adult with us in the car. It was a nightmare every time we went out without the extra adult she was not happy. It took a few trips for her to get used not having someone playing with her. She always had a few toys (soft) and she learnt that if she trowed them then she wouldn't have them until the next time we stopped. Children eventually need to learn to occupy themselves in the car.
My top tips for long journey

Don't give them snacks so they can't choke
put children 's music or stories on while they are awake
When you stop give time for running around before you get back in the car
Don't give them anything that is hard or sharp if you have a accident it will injure them.
Getting a mirror so you can see them can really help

[Hullygully]

[Hullygully]

The name, not the post.

You know you will forever be Shat, don't you?

[Kayzr]

Adults in front, children in back. Its very simple, don't leave hammers in the car where children can reach them.

[thefurryone]

You could probably ease the majority your worries by not giving the 3 year old a hammer when you have both children in the back of the car .

[Chandon]

adults in the front.

[notso]

I don't think ShatnersBassoon was being snide, just pointing out that you ought to be able to see and reach the DC as they are not that far away.
Also Tigress added the which excuses all.

To be fair in the OP you didn't really cite safety reasons you said keeping DC company, which does come across as a bit precious. IMO it is good for DC to learn to amuse themselves, and sit nicely in the car not throwing small toys or whinging.

Obviously you won't be travelling round with any potential weapons in the back, so that won't be a problem.

Practically, I think an adult would be very uncomfortable in the middle seat of a regular car on a long journey. I currently have three DC, my eldest is 11 and a skinny minnie and she is very uncomfortable in between her brothers forward facing carseats. As we are expecting a fourth DC we are upgrading DH's company car to a 7 seater with three proper seats in the middle row.

In my experience my DC have always been happy enough on their own in the back, and we have been on some long trips.
The only major issue I remember was when DS1 had a bug and was being sick so I sat in the back with him.

[ShatnersBassoon]

"You know you will forever be Shat, don't you?"

I might change my name to ShitnersBassoon and have done.

[Hullygully]

[WhereTheWildThingsWere]

ShitnersBassoon



Top tips for travelling

Give them endless snacks, it stops them talking.
Never play sodding kids stuff in the car, get them used to your music from an early age, tbf sometimes Queen does eventually wear thin but it beats endess repatitions of the Tweenies or the bloody Gruffalo hands down.
And definately keep the hammers in the boot.

[lesstalkmoreaction]

Sorry but I have now heard everything and its made my morning!!!