Mumsnet Talk

In school swimming lesson on friday another y7 boy (who has previous form as a bully both toward my ds and to others) held ds' head under water 4 times, for 5 - 6 seconds each time. Ds isnt a strong swimmer and repeatedly told the boy to stop. Then ds got out of the pool and was followed by the other boy who then grabbed ds and pushed him into the deep end. School response is to exclude offender from swim lesson next week. I think a stronger punishment is in line because consequences of holding someones head under the water could be dire and irreversible. If it were your ds, what wld you want the school to do?

I'd want the school to explain exactly why they allowed it to happen again after it happened the first time.

I don't think you're in a position to expect input to the punishment, but you have to know that they are keeping your child safe during lessons, and they clearly weren't.

Really horrible for your DS, I hope he can be encouraged to feel safe next time.

Your poor DS! I think the school have done the right thing by removing the boy from swimming lessons. It's not acceptable behaviour and it is also very dangerous behaviour. I can't see what else they can do at this moment in time.

Is the boy in question 'bullying' outside these swim lessons or only at this time? If it is always then yes something else needs to be done.

poor ds! that would freak me out as an adult.

id go in all guns blazing, he could have drowned!

Um I actually think it this happened in 1 swimming lesson - 4x held head under opwater and 1x pushed in I'd be less feeling like tearing the bully limb from limb and more like asking what the hell was going on with "supervision " of the class.

Surely this is something that a single episode might occur but should be spotted and a zero tolerance policy applied? I would end the lesson for the perpetrator and they'd be on the side/ in detention surely.

I agree dictating punishment isn't gor you to do but ascertaining if they are actually able to keep your son acceptably safe in the pool is.

Apparently the teacher didnt see my ds' head being held under water, the exclusion from next weeks lesson was in reponse to him pushing ds into the pool. Tomorrow I want to speak to the school to tell them exactly what happened. As the teacher didnt notice my ds being put in danger, I am concerned not that there isnt adequate supervision.

This is a school which supposedly has a very strict disciplinary code. I wonder what would be a reasonable punishment for holding someones head under water.

I am concerned not that there isnt adequate supervision.

I think you should not focus on the punishment at all, but ask the school how they are going to ensure this does not happen to any child again.

Ask them if they have completed a risk assessment around this boy's behaviour at swimming lessons, and what steps they are taking to ensure that the risk is minimised. One solution is that the boy is supervised at all times- if this is not an option, I would be questioning why the school has identified a risk but chosen not to minimise it. This potentially leaves the school wide open should a serious incident occur due to this boy's behaviour.

As the boy has previous form as a bully, do you have a record of all the events and any previous discussions with them.

They appear to be treating this as a one-off incident of bad behaviour, rather than as bullying.

I would want this to be acknowledged as part of the longer-term systematic bullying that has been tackled before (i assume that's what you mean by "history"). You need to pick up where you left off ISWIM, as the school needs to know that the bullying has started again. Will you be able to see the same staff member who dealt with the previous bullying? They should be able to react quickly, and (I hope) be able to emphasise the longer term aspects of this with PE dept in terms of need for closed supervision in/around the pool. Such a request will carry weight, and should be put into effect immediately.

I hope this is resolved soon.

Thank you so much for your responses. Its helping us clarify what we can reasonably expect. My main concern is that ds is safe in swimming lessons. A risk assessment is a good idea as this boys behaviour is frequently out of line in lessons, on school trips, etc. We have a record of bullying (I usually corrsspond by email) where it has affected our ds. I know there are other incidents involving other children too.

Despite the schools supposed tough approach to bullying and bad behaviour, there is a persistent problem and I am not sure it is being addressed. Maybe my expectations are unrealistic but i do expect ds to be safe when he goes to school.

put your concerns in writing OP - this is a health and safety issue. Those children aren't being supervised properly if the other boy was able to hold his head under the water 4 times with no-one noticing.