feeding advice desperately needed!

[BJB21]

need some infant feeding advice asap!
mainly ff my 8 wk old with one bf am, however, his feeding pattern seems to be getting worse not better. feeds 3 hrly during the day and has 5-6oz. i often have to 'stretch' the feeds out as he doesnt go 3hrs easily and im pacifying him in between which usually works. i did try feeding as and when he wanted but that was worse.i only settle him by taking him out in pram, otherwise its difficult to go 3hrs. the nighttimes are the same really, although for the first 'wake' of the night he will sometimes go 4hrs, then its back to 3 hrs till i get up. i know he is still little but i am expecting too much to expect him to go a bit longer now? last two nights ive fed him around 8pm,had 60z, slept till midnight, had 5-6oz, then waking at 3am (only having 3oz), then waking at 5 ish, sometimes earlier, cant get him back off so try him in bed with me(sometimes works), then he wants to get up at 6am, which i would be fine with if he hadnt just woken me up! im going shopping in a bit and seriously considering hungry baby formULA, what else could it be? give him infacol in case of colic (dont think it is the majority of the time though). hes a big baby now, probably almost 13lb.

[PinkGlitterFairy]

I'm no expert, have never bottle fed, only breast fed but your baby sounds perfectly normal. Mine were 3 or 4 months plus before going 3 hours between feeds. Sometimes they just wanted the cuddle and a v short snack. Hard work, but normal. x

[Isawbumperkissingsantaclaus]

God the waking up all night is so crap, you must be exhausted!

What do you mean by feeding as and when is 'worse'?

TBH I think this is fairly normal behaviour for an 8 week old. DD used to go every 3 hours like clockwork, then suddenly wouldn't go more than hours without a feed. I don't FF so can advise re the amounts he is taking. Their patterns can change and he is still really young. I think even with FF it is best to demand feed.

Do you have anyone who can help you with the night feeds or take DS out for a few hours in the day with a bottle so you can get some rest?

[BJB21]

thanks, what i meant by as and when was demand feeding, but then he would only take alittle bit, fall asleep then want more after say 2o min. i have got help and to be honest its not the tiredness thing, its the not knowing what to do for the best to settle him etc,keep wondering if it is normal or that he needs more food and is hungry etc

[Lulumama]

IME , demand feeding is the best way to go, your baby finds their own pattern, and going 3 - 4hours between feeds is a lot for an 8 week old to manage

babies often don;t develop any sort of discernible routine in the first few weeks, and if they do, they are altered when baby has a growth spurt or starts teething or gets a cold

i don;t think hungry baby formula will help, as your baby sounds hungry, in the normal sense ! also, it can give little babies a bad tummy ache which won;t help settle him

don;t try to push him to go 3 hourly yet, he is not ready

feeding might need to be little and often or a lot and often. follow his cues and feed him when he is hungry.. more likely to take a good feed , then have a good sleep IME

[Isawbumperkissingsantaclaus]

The joys of being a mother! You always wonder what to do for the best. DD is 5 months and every night we still have the debate "do you think she is hungry? should we make this her last feed and put her down? will we be able to fit 2 feeds in before bed?"

I wish I could help you more, but you will learn what he needs more as time goes on, and you may find yourself slipping into your own pattern. But the most important thing to remember is that this all sound perfectly normal. As long as he is getting enough food when he wants it and you are not going completely crazy from lack of sleep you are doing a great job!

Don't listen to anyone who tells you your baby should be sleeping though the night, or that their baby the same age is sleeping through or you 'should be getting him into a routine' etc. do what you think is best, but you are not expected to automatically 'know' what is best IYSWIM?

[BJB21]

WE have same debate every night as regards to whether its the 'last' feed!! some nights i will feed him at 7pm and he will go up into his crib and that will be his last one, but then the next night it wont be his last one until 3 hrs later at his 10pm one. we just keep trying and hoping. other people do get me thinking tho when they tell me hungry formula worked for them or that their baby goes 5hrs or whatever, i cant help it. i suppose its just because he has gained so much weight now and looks so big and yet he seems to waking/feeding like a tiny newborn would.

[Lulumama]

regardless of how many pounds he weighs, his actual stomach is still very small, and needs regular filling ...

at 8 weeks, it is very soon to expect a baby to go 7 to 7

[BJB21]

NO way would i expect him go from 7 to 7!i would think something wrong!! it wouuld be nice maybe from 11- 5 or 12 - 6!

[lulumama]

i think i misunderstood your 'last feed' point

a baby still has a small stomach at 8 weeks

why not try feeding him on demand, and if he is satisfied and more settled, rather than over tired , he might sleep longer at night.. and feed more efficiently

try to rest in the day when he rests..

have you thought about increasing the amount of breastfeeds you give? you can snuggle down for late night feeds without having to sort a bottle out and you might feel more rested

[BJB21]

lulu,
by last feed i mean the last one he has downstairs before i put him up in his crib, thats when he has his biggest sleep then(nearly always 4 hours). although i try and stick to sort of 3 hrly feeds during the day( if i take him out he always lasts that long)i do kind of do demand feeding during the evening, but i have found that if i feed little and often its a nightmare whereby he will literally have a few mouthfuls of milk and then not want anymore. then when he cries i start wondering whether he is actually hungry or has stomach ache and is sucking to ease it. i dont 'make' him wait tho if hes crying!im not that cruel. i only drag it out by rocking him sometimes or if he falls asleep in sling or out in pram. as for the bf, God how i wish id exclusively bf. how its backfired on me the decision to mixed feed. I thought it would be too time consuming to bf totally. how ironic that is now! the bf's how become less and less obviously as supply has dwindled and now i just bf first thing and maybe once more early evening. i did think of stopping as it almost seems pointless now with the amount of bottles hes having but i feel too guilty!

[BJB21]

oh by the way ive no chance of resting in the day as he only cat naps for 20-30 min. Sometimes if im lucky he will have an hour. Other than that he will only sleep when out and about and sometimes he will stay asleep in pram or car seat when get back, but thats not all the time and if i get in and think hes settled and i can do jobs or whatever 9 times out of 10 he wakes up within 5 or ten mins.