Are growth spurts a certainty?

[ShantiBee]

Thanks in advance to anyone who can offer any thoughts - sorry if its long.

DS just turned 9wks and is gaining weight slowly after a 'steep' post birth descent that alarmed MW who insisted we top up. managed to stand my ground until he lost again about ten days later - my confidence crumpled and we started 1 top-up a day which we stopped after a couple of weeks because i felt it was self-defeating if trying to calibrate my supply w. his demand.
since then, and with the help of a wonderfully informed & supportive latch-on group, we have been excl BF and weight gain has been steady and in line w. WHO recommendations (threw red book out of window some time ago).
The point now is that he is still really tiny and we have realised that we haven't seen anything like a clearly defined 'growth spurt' although there have been times when i've thought he was upping his demand. Is growing in spurts a dead cert? Everything else seems fine - v. alert, smiley moods, nappies ok, sleeps 10pm-3/4am most nights and is active, kicking etc. Dh and i weigh at home weekly on elec scales (have since abandoned the HV who scared us about his brain and insisted on measuring his head at 3 week hearing test... it was the second time since birth) and gain this last week was very low - only 30g. i so want to BF excl. but Dh and i wondering how long we can keep going - obviously terrified of hampering his dvlpmnt in any way. should i be worrying about how much he is getting and what his weekly gain is? or is the fact that he is gaining & not losing enough?
i have to admit, the 'paranoia' i have read about on here regarding the 'am i making enough/is he getting enough' theme rears its ugly head periodically when i once again doubt myself - at the first loss, MW told me she was worried about the 'development of his brain' because he was clearly 'not getting enough'. she then began this intense regime of coming to the house to weigh him every 2-3 days, the stress of which became almost unbearable. i am certain that this was a large contributing factor of his second drop in weight - but that's another story.
Am realising from reading this wonderful site that yes, 'we are all individuals' but would love to hear any thoughts from anyone with similar experiences.

[tiktok]

Growth spurts are common but not inevitable by any means, Shanti.

You have been through a lot, and what rubbish support from the people whose job it is to support you

Some people might say 'stop weighing'....babies don't normally need to be weighed weekly.

Your baby sounds fine.

If you think he needs more, just offer more breast(s)

[SpawnChorus]

I'm sure someone will be along shortly with wise advice, but in the meantime I wanted to offer my sympathy about your cruddy MW. She sounds like an arse worrying you about brain development

Oh, and I never had any noticable growth spurts with either of my DC.

[SpawnChorus]

Sorry - was too slow...tiktok got there with the wise advice quicker then my typing

[ChrissyJ]

OMG midwife weighing every 2-3 days, what a nightmare intrusion for you. And how ridiculous - surely babies can fluctuate from hour to hr just depending on feeding, weeing and pooing. No advice I'm afraid, but every sympathy.

[ShantiBee]

thanks for your quick responses, support and advice. had never thought about stopping the weighing - will discuss with dh.

have had lots of visitors recently - think it disrupts the 'flow' so to speak..! plan on doing nothing but feed for the forseeable future.

thanks everyone.