How to wean a toddler?

[Rinceoir]

I've been on here a few times and am getting nowhere. DD is 2.3 and still breastfeeding. I'm pretty desperate to stop.

I've read the Kellymom pages. I've tried distraction. I've tried warm milk in a sippy cup. I've been away for a night. I have a very stubborn child who becomes absolutely distraught and begs and pleads for milk. We are generally down to morning and evening feeds with the occasional overnight one but once she decides she wakes a feed she just won't give in. She drags at my top, sticks her hands down my bra which drives me up the wall. Offers of cuddles turn in to a desperate struggle for milk. Tonight she woke at 12, I've refused to give in and she's still begging for it, I feel so guilty and hate that I'm causing her such upset but for my own sanity I need her to stop.

I'm not sure why it bothers me so much now- I'm not pregnant and it's only a few times a day but I just really want to stop.

Can anyone help me to do this without causing her such distress?