Baby not gaining weight :(

(44 Posts)

MNHQ have commented on this thread.

butterflylove16 Fri 24-Jun-16 12:34:35

Hi everyone, I'm not sure if this is the right place for this I'm just feeling really upset.

Dd is 9 days old, I've been exclusively breastfeeding & thought she was getting enough. But the midwife has just been & dd hasn't gained any weight since Monday. I have been struggling a little with the latch on my right boob (midwife showed me a new position), but she always seems to feed fine from the left. The midwife isn't sure if my supply is enough, so said no longer than 3 hours between feeds (which doesn't often happen anyway) & we have to take her to the hospital on Sunday to get weighed. If she hadn't gained weight by then we have to top her up with formula.

I just feel like I'm letting dd down. I'm trying so hard but it's obviously not good enough sad breastfeeding has always been so important to me, I didn't even buy a single bottle as I've had my heart set on it. Does anyone please have any advice? Thank you.

dementedpixie Fri 24-Jun-16 12:54:20

Maybe try the feeding forum for more detailed bf advice. flowers

dementedpixie Fri 24-Jun-16 12:55:12

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/breast_and_bottle_feeding

butterflylove16 Fri 24-Jun-16 12:58:05

Ahh thank you didn't know there was ome.

KatyN Fri 24-Jun-16 14:31:12

I know nothing about breast feeding as I bottle fed both mine but at the limited I would try feeding her every 3 hours day and night. If she is asleep wake her up, a nappy change normally does the trick. Once she is gaining weight and both boobs are working (??) you can stop waking her so she often.
good luck, teaching them to feed is tough when you would think it's automatic. K

avocadosweet Fri 24-Jun-16 14:35:11

Facebook group called breastfeeding younger babies and beyond is good. Best of luck.

butterflylove16 Fri 24-Jun-16 14:41:09

Thank you both smile

Daisyandbabies Fri 24-Jun-16 14:49:50

If breastfeeding is that important to you, call up your local breastfeeding help. Where I live, breastfeeding support will come out to your house, etc.
My personal advice would be to feed as often as possible; I was feeding my baby perhaps once every half hour or so (or at least offering) at that newborn stage. If you are still struggling with latch, ask again for help. Ask as many times as you need until you and baby feel comfortable. Plenty of skin to skin and co sleeping, along with plenty of water and food for you.

NickyEds Fri 24-Jun-16 14:53:04

As pp said you might get better advice on the infant feeding board. You can report your post and ask mnhq to move it. Or I can do it for you if you'd like?

gillyweed Fri 24-Jun-16 14:58:56

Has she actually lost weight or just not put any on? Plenty of wet and dirty nappies? (If there is an output then there has to be an input!).

Both of my kids had a side they preferred - I sometimes started feeding on the other side so they got as much out before they got the side they really liked!

Lastly, skin to skin is amazing for uping supply- make a flask of tea, lots of delicious food, good book, phone, laptop/tablet, box set etc. Get into bed with your little one, get your skin out and just snuggle and feed all day.

Also why is your midwife doubting your supply, is your baby happy and alert?

TheDisreputableDog Fri 24-Jun-16 15:02:29

If you're struggling with supply it might be worth looking at diet/supplements, lots of advice out there about what you can do, key is to keep going, the more you feed the more milk you will make. Hope Sunday brings positive news X

butterflylove16 Fri 24-Jun-16 17:48:07

Thanks for all of your responses - I'm afraid I don't know how to report my post?

She's not lost any, just maintained. We have plenty of wet & dirty nappies too, & she never seems to get upset by being hungry. She is happy & alert & for the most part a very contented baby. I also leak breast milk & can see I'm producing it. That's a good idea about just snuggling in bed with lots of skin to skin, I think I just feel guilty not doing anything but I need to remember that I am. I will follow the midwife's advice & hopefully dd gains some weight, if not I will start looking into my diet etc.

I feel more at peace about it now, & if dd does end up needing formula top ups I will do whatever is best for her. I think I've just been feeling like a failure as I put so much pressure on myself.

Thank you all again.

NickyEds Fri 24-Jun-16 18:25:07

You should not feel guilty about sitting on the sofa and feeding your baby, at this stage everything else can wait!

IonaMumsnet (MNHQ) Fri 24-Jun-16 20:31:35

Hi there OP. We're going to move this thread over to the feeding forum shortly where you'll get lots more useful advice we're sure. Thank you to everyone who has already given great ideas and support here.

mrswishywashy Fri 24-Jun-16 20:51:38

You're doing great it such a huge learning curve for you both.
Do lots of skin to skin so she's always near breasts, every time she shows a sign of hunger then latch on. I think it's hard when there is the three hour guidance as some babies do eat more frequently, my daughter certainly did. Do you see her swallowing? It would be a good idea to call the national breast feeding helpline and also see a lactation consultant in person so check latch and check tongue tie. I found my local breast feeding support group the most helpful when I struggled in the early weeks, the group I went to is run by association of breast feeding mothers. Set yourself up a nest with snacks and water and TV control and books and keep baby close, forget everything else and I hope on Sunday weight is on the up.

gillyweed Fri 24-Jun-16 21:01:59

My mum always said to me that breastfeeding is nature's way of making the mum sit down, rest and recover - particularly in the early days. Do not feel guilty about feeding your baby!

My moto when feeding is, if in doubt whip them out - any cue from the baby I feed, and this is generally a lot more often than every 3 hours, at least for the first few weeks/months.

I'm not remotely medically trained but I'm not sure how good your midwifes advice is, particularly if your baby hasn't actually lost any weight!

butterflylove16 Fri 24-Jun-16 21:57:13

Thank you for moving it, I wasn't sure how.

I am often feeding her more than every 3 hours, especially in the evenings - the midwife just said not to go over this. I don't drive & live in a village so it's difficult to get to groups or anything, we also recently moved so I have no family or friends close by for support, thankfully I have my husband. The midwife highlighted a phone number I can always call which should be handy. When she feeds (especially on the left) I can hear her swallowing & see milk on her lips when she's finished. She also gained 60 g between Saturday & Monday which was good, that's why this came as a surprise to me. I'm hoping now I've had some help with the right latch on my right breast that will help.

I will also make sure to truly just relax with dd & not worry about not doing too much else than nurse. I love her so much & really want to always do the best for her. I've been feeling anxious this past few days & struggling to sleep because I worry about her breathing, but I remind myself that worrying won't help.

Thank you all so so much, I've had some great advice & support.

Orsono Fri 24-Jun-16 22:27:44

I've been in your situation, OP, and it's horrible, sorry you're going through it. The thing to do, apart from the good advice of accessing breastfeeding support if you can, is to concentrate on getting as much milk into her as you can over the next couple of days. Spending a day in bed or on the sofa is good, with skin to skin as has been suggested, but you could also look at doing breast compressions to get more milk into her. If there is still an issue with her weight at the next appointment, you could also look at topping up with expressed milk rather than formula, if you'd rather. I'd recommend checking out the website Kellymom for great information on supply and ways to up milk intake like breast compreseeions.

I'd recommend talking to a breastfeeding helpline before the next appointment so they can help you with some strategies so you can show the midwife that you're actively addressing it.

Daisyandbabies Fri 24-Jun-16 22:31:02

All your current worries soon won't be relevant. We've all been there...welcome to motherhood! The worried will always be there, they just change with time! All you can do is your best; listen to your instincts and your baby

Jo1954 Fri 24-Jun-16 22:39:19

I was pushed into formula top ups by my midwife, who kept threatening to send us to the hospital if my baby didn't increase 60g overnight (this was a few days afterbirth). It almost destroyed breastfeeding for me, but fortunately I managed to drop the tops ups and exclusively BF within a few weeks.

I recommend a lactation consultant or helpline/local group. Babies don't gain weight in nice straight lines and as long as they are healthy, alert, plenty of wet nappies etc, feeding is probably going well.

I went to a lactation consultant - I considered that as I was planning on BF for 9 months minimum, it was a worthwhile investment to get it going well.

butterflylove16 Fri 24-Jun-16 22:47:53

We are currently having skin to skin as some of you recommended, & she's just feeding on & off as she pleases. It's actually not hurting & I feel a lot more relaxed & can tell she does too smile I think I've been a little obsessed with getting us both ready for the day & trying to do too much, but thinking about it that's just made me feel more anxious about everything. But this is so lovely, I'm feeling relaxed & enjoying feeding more taking lots of time, so hopefully it will help dd to get more milk. This feels so natural, & I hope dd is able to get more milk. I will check out Kellymom now smile as well as call th3 breastfeeding line tomorrow, I want to do all I can before Sunday.

butterflylove16 Fri 24-Jun-16 22:50:58

Sorry if this is a silly question - but how exactly do I go about finding a lactation consultant?

bigmamapeach Sat 25-Jun-16 05:31:27

www.lcgb.org/find-an-ibclc/

These should all have "ibclc" after their name which is the qualification. They will normally charge parents directly as are private consultants.

The charities which often have drop in groups for free and have helpline support include the

Nct
La leche league
Association breastfeeding mothers
Breastfeeding network

Children's centres should also tell you if you phone what support there is for free locally

bigmamapeach Sat 25-Jun-16 05:34:15

And in Scotland there is a site called

www.feedgoodfactor.org.uk

Which has links to find support and lots of other info... Just in case you are north of border!

butterflylove16 Sat 25-Jun-16 08:40:34

Thank you so much! I will definitely have a look.

DD has been feeding so much last night, I'm very tired but pleased & hope she's getting enough milk ready for tomorrow.

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