letting a friend feed your baby

[ithoughtofitfirst]

Has anyone here ever let a friend who is nursing breastfeed their baby? Too embarrassed to ask anyone in RL! Such a nosey question

[Sleepyhoglet]

Just no! I don't want someone else's nipple in my baby's mouth. Was thinking about this jn the bath this pm weirdly with regards to royalty in the past having wet nurses

[Chinateapots]

I nursed both my dc for over a year on demand. To be frank it has never ever entered my head...

[ithoughtofitfirst]

A stranger's nipple no less! Unless their wet nurses were their bezzie mates.

[Honeybear30]

No and I wouldn't let anyone! it's too intimate I think, a personal thing between mum and baby. Unless in an emergency, if my baby was very distressed and struggling with a bottle and I wasn't available I don't think I would mind then.

[Tanaqui]

I know sisters who did, but maybe that is different? I would be happy to feed someone else's baby if the alternative was it going hungry, but am not sure how I would feel about someone feeding mine!

[GlitterKandinsky]

I don't know anyone who has done this.

I've got to say I wouldn't have a problem with it though. I'd definitely let one of my sisters feed my baby in an emergency for example. Possibly a really good friend too if they offered.

[Notfastjustfurious]

Funny I was just saying to dh last night (more like early hours this morning) that a wet nurse doing nights would be amazing. I'm so tired I don't think I'd care about strange nipples.

[CrispyFern]

I donated breast milk if that counts.

[Missanneshirley]

I have spoken with friends about this and almost all of them said they'd happily feed someone else's baby in an emergency situation only, but none were so sure about having their babies fed!
I remember though the utter wrenching panic if my babies were teeny and screaming with hunger and I couldn't get to them right away for whatever reason - if I was stuck. away for any length of time I'd rather someone else fed them than have them cry like that!

[evelynj]

It's normal in some cultures. I'd have said no with my pfb but it wouldn't concern me much if I had another I think

[MissMedusa]

It's not really a good idea as everyone has a different mix of bacteria in their body many of which pass through the breastmilk. Your own baby will have them from you along with antibodies or other bacteria to keep them in check but another baby won't have that same mix. I believe they pasteurise donor milk for this reason or, at least, screen for certain bacteria.

[ithoughtofitfirst]

I have a baby who dicks around royally with bottles who I need to leave with a friend for 4 hours on Saturday. I have expressed loads for her but am worried she won't take it. Said friend is currently nursing a 6 month old and said "I could just whack her on me if she's upset"... And I wasn't that bothered by the idea.

[JustTryEverything]

Snap OP! Mine is currently refusing bottles and if I had to leave her at the moment I would be much happier if she was with someone who could comfort her by "whacking her on" if needed! S'not ideal of course but sounds like a bloody good plan B to me.

[MrsTawdry]

I wouldn't mind if the friend had a clean bill of health. Not at all. I formula fed though...so maybe that's why I don't mind? Doesn't bother me one bit.

[Mouthfulofquiz]

I offered to look after a friend's newborn for a hour once as she just needed a break - anyway, she popped the baby down in my spare Moses basket and then said 'oops, I forgot her bottles, you can just feed her yourself can't you?' (I was still breastfeeding my then ten month old at the time)
In my initial shock I just said 'of course!' Then was weirded out for five minutes and then decided I actually didn't mind and was happy to if the baby was distressed.
After all that internal monologue, the baby slept through!

[MrsTawdry]

It is sensible and your friend sounds very kind. Why not?

[SugarMiceInTheRain]

I would feed someone else's baby in an emergency, and would rather someone else breastfed mine if I wasn't there, than have her go hungry - we haven't had success with bottles either.

[TinklyLittleLaugh]

I looked after my friend's very young baby when she went back to work. I always had a massive urgent to whack him on when he was hungry, (never did of course) it just felt weird to be giving him a bottle.

[minipie]

My mum babysat a friend's baby when I was little. She BF him because he was BF and wouldn't take the one off bottle the friend had left. Not sure if she ever told the mum...

I don't have an issue with it. I wouldn't want a stranger to BF my baby, but if it was a friend, and it was more convenient than any other solution, why not?

[margaritasbythesea]

I haven't, although when I was bf it was my instinct to calm an upset child. It isn't recommended due to the risks of infection and as the baby needs the composition of milk the mother is making, which will depend on things like age.

[squizita]

If I really knew them and trusted them yes. But only in an emergency not "here you go milk up my baby will ya..?"
TBH it would never arise for me as dd takes a bottle and I've lots of frozen milk.

[Artandco]

I think as long as you know them well it's fine. It's not like your best friend/ sister is going to offer to feed them if they know they could pass anything on.

In many cultures it's perfectly normal. And I think in emergencies it's very helpful. At the moment everyone would be freaked out, but if something happens unplanned, I'm sure really most of society would rather baby was fed and settled, rather than left hours without feed.
So I would be happy knowing that if I left baby with say friend who also had a baby breastfed, that even though I had left bottles, if baby refused them or I was double the time expected, then baby would be fine.

[ithoughtofitfirst]

she has offered in a last resort situation and that's really reassuring for me cause I hate the thought of her being sad and just wanting a suck and a cuddle. now I just need to work out what to do when I leave him with my mum when I'm at work next week wish I could just take her with me. Never had this with ds he took a bottle like a dream God love him.

[TheHoundsBitch]

I haven't, but I would have (when I was still lactating of course!). I would have let a friend/ SIL/ cousin feed DS too if the need arose.