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Leaving ebf 6 month old for evening. Advice please(11 Posts)
I have a six-month old daughter who is currently ebf but over the last few days we have been trying to introduce solids. She's had a few spoonfulls of puree but she is always still hungry for breastmilk afterwards. She will drink water/breastmilk from a cup but again it seems to be a snack - not the main event.
I asked her grandparents to babysit her this weekend for an evening while we attend a party. The intention was to give her a big bf before I left and that she would settle shortly after (as it is around her usual bedtime) and that if she woke to give her expressed milk/water and comfort. and phone us if any problem.
Now they've told us that they're going to a function that night "for an hour" but intend to take her with them. Aside from all the car-seat/buggy logistics etc, They seem to think this will be ok but I'm really not sure. I think it will unsettle her and worry that it's past her bedtime. I have visions of daughter getting very upset and more often than not only boob will comfort her.
WWYD? I think I should probably take her with us (even though I've been looking forward to my first child-free evening for months) but just wanted to check I'm not being a bit too pfb/paranoid about it?
I'm facing the same kind of issue with leaving 5 month old EBF DS during working hours in the next couple of weeks. I've asked a lot of mums and in here and keep being told it will be ok, although apparently he may feed all night to make up for it... I know that's no advice really but hope it helps. Stressful though.
Are the two events nearby? I have put DS to bed (pjs, grobag, big bf) and then put him in his pram for evening events before, and he has slept blithely through it all...
No right answers here. I do agree though that she may be unsettled being taken to the function with GPs. However taking her with you to an adult party is possible no tideal either- defeats the point somewhat.
No advice- I stopped evening "adult only " events when my kids were born, and learned to socialise in other ways.
I think the issue is less "leaving BF baby" and more "people who offered to babysit now planning on taking her to a function after bedtime"! I certainly wouldn't be pleased with that regardless of how baby was fed.
Apologies if I misread that- thought it was a feeding question hence being in this section. Can you ask the GPs not to go? Or to take shifts so DD stays at home in bed?
Thanks for your responses.
Toads. Events are about 15minutes drive apart and I couldn't bear to think of her crying for that long. Sadly she usually wakes up being taken from car seat. I've also been told about them making up for it later when you're not there both by the nursery and another bf mother but it's so hard to do/believe. Let us know how you get on.
Deepblue. I'm happy to take her with me to most events but this was going to be my first evening since she was born. Generally we don't go out that much anyway. Our next planned event where I'll not be able to take her is November.
Leedy. Yes you hit the nail on the head there really. I feel let down but got the impression from them that they were really looking forward to babysitting. So now, I'm going to feel bad telling them they can't!
No Toads, you didn't misread. Issue is a bit of both really. How to get her to treat food as the main event instead of wanting a feed afterwards?
Sorry I didn't really make myself clear.
Can't ask GPs not to go..it's a good friends significant birthday. Shifts not possible either.
Think I'm just going to tell them we're taking her with us.
"How to get her to treat food as the main event instead of wanting a feed afterwards?"
I think that is up to the individual baby. Milk remains the main part of the diet until 12 months.
I did BLW, my babies didn't eat much solid food at all until 8/9 months, up till then it was very tiny amounts.
Personally I would just let them take her. Worse that will happen is you will come home to her awake ad being played with at midnight or her crashed out asleep in one grandparents arms.
Mine both ebf also until 6 months, but many times took expressed milk from cup as I had to Be out/ work etc. really always were fine.
At 6 months she can be given milk you left, water, or any type of food to snack on. Sticks of melon good as they can suck and gum and get liquid from as well. She will be fed all day anyway beforehand, feed more often if needed in day , and many babies are night weaned by this age so go hours without feed if any type.
At 6 months mine were fed 8pm, then not again until about 8am when they woke
" Worse that will happen is you will come home to her awake ad being played with at midnight or her crashed out asleep in one grandparents arms."
I agree with that, but what could have happened in the hours prior to this scenario? A crying unsettled baby and frazzled Gps unable to console her.
I wouldn't be able to enjoy my evening. Sorry.
Sometimes babies will cry. I don't think there's a problem with baby crying unsettled in the evening if she is being rocked/ fussed over/ sung to. Baby left to cry in cot yes, but baby just unsettled but being comforted fine
Op - what time are you going out/ back? Could you maybe swap day around so baby has lots of naps that day and so happy to just stay awake until you return if your happier with that? I'm sure she will sleep in car seat or pram out in evening maybe easier than at home if your not there. It's light at the moment so grandparents could pop her in pram at 9pm and take for walk to settle maybe
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