16mo dd still a complete boob monster. Help!

(10 Posts)
Blollocks Tue 29-Apr-14 09:30:49

I want to stop feeding my dd, but she's a complete boob obsessive. I'm at home with her during the day and she's constantly pulling at my tops to try and feed. Her feeding patterns are more akin to that of a newborn rather than a toddler and it's really getting me down.

She eats well and loves a huge variety of food, drinks water fine from cups etc. she's not great with milk though, she started to have a bottle when I went back to work 3 evenings a week but she now just refuses as she's learnt I'll feed her when she gets in.

I don't remember having this issue with my ds, when I went back to work he was very accepting (eventually) of a bottle and feeds just tapered out of there own accord by around 14 months. Even night feeds he just decided one night he'd accept a cuddle instead and went back to sleep without the feed.

My dd spent some time with her nanny last Monday, I saw her briefly before I went to work and she had a quick feed. By the time id finished my shift (only 5 hours) my boob (dd only feeds from one side which I know doesn't help) was massively engorged and hot and I spent the next couple of days trying to make sure It didn't get any worse.

Dp and I are supposed to have a weekend away at the end of May, and I'm dreading it! We were away for just over 24 hours in February and I was in so much pain and felt so poorly (despite expressing at various points) that I didn't enjoy it as much as I hoped.

Any ideas would be great, if I refuse dd feeds she gets very upset and will only occasionally be distracted by something else. I'm at the point now where I just want to scream "get the hell off me!" hmm

Blollocks Tue 29-Apr-14 09:31:10

Sorry for typos, on my phone.

Blollocks Tue 29-Apr-14 16:33:19

Bump

catellington Tue 29-Apr-14 19:35:05

Watching and sympathise as I'm in similar situation with my 14 mo dd, she has increased feeds and on the weekend I guess it's at least 12 a day and she gets so upset if I try to defer or distract her. Last night stopped feed before sleep before she was actually asleep and wanted to get her to sleep by other means but she got so upset within just ten minutes she gave herself a nosebleed sad was horrid

catellington Tue 29-Apr-14 19:52:35
PrincessChick Wed 30-Apr-14 07:37:13

My dd is younger, 10.5 months, but we're very much in the same situation. Bf'ing like a newborn is exactly what I said to DH last night after a day of tears and arguments about dd being so needy. I don't mind feeding her but all the time is wearing me down especially feeding her through the night. Sorry, no advice, just lots of sympathy and fear now that dd is not going to grow out of this any time soon hmm

Will be watching this with interest...

Polyethyl Wed 30-Apr-14 07:47:42

I also am watching with sympathetic interest but no advice. My baby is 15 months and is becoming more demanding, and I'm getting fed up of it.

CrimsonDay Wed 30-Apr-14 07:58:34

Also reading and watching in Sympathy.

DS is still the same although I work full time, when I'm at home he feeds at least every hour (apart from 6/7- 10ish pm when he's in bed) and he's 2 next week shock saying no results in huge sobbing tantrums and him screaming for as long as it takes for me to give in.

catellington Wed 30-Apr-14 15:01:17

I have resigned myself to carrying on indefinitely. I never saw myself breastfeeding a toddler before she was born, but I can't bring myself to wean her, my meagre efforts have been too upsetting and I can see the bright side. It gets her back to sleep when other people I know had to get up at 4am. ditto for 2am, 5am etc etc. I get lots of cuddles. We had a visit to A&E last week, I had to run out the door with no bags or food or money and we were there for 5 hours - not a problem with my mobile milk bar! Still able to have the extra calories and not putting on weight. etc etc. The main downsides for me are the shirt lifting in public, night feeds and cosleeping now she is bigger means DH is consigned to spare room, and other people's ridiculous comments (which I should really ignore but get me down especially when they come from family or HCPs)

Sorry thats probably not helpful to anyone else as I'm really justifying the fact I've given up on weaning and can't offer any advice to those of you with more resolve. I have no idea what I'm letting myself in for grin

DD was like this and I'm afraid I have no advice except to try and distract her but don't prevent her feeding when she needs it. I was working full time and I could see at the end of the day how much DD needed it emotionally. She weaned herself during a nasty case of oral thrush just before her 2nd birthday, but still pretends to feed now when she sees DS. hmm

Spending time with other children really helped distraction wise and sometimes she would fall asleep without feeding because she was so tired. Is that an option for you?

I do think you have made the right decision though. I find DD's continued boob obsession really frustrating but it makes her calm, happy and confident in my love for her so it seems a necessary evil for the moment. This is not a decision other people need to have an opinion about and I wish we could get past the sexualisation/it's not natural debate.

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