Stopping/cutting down breastfeeding with a 13 month old....advice please

[Redcagoule]

I have happily breastfed my 13 month old and now want to stop. I had planned to start cutting down when he was one and, apart from one or two feeds a day maybe, have stopped by the time I went back to work (in two weeks).

I cut out night feeds quite easily and can usually distract him between breakfast and lunch when he 'asks' to bf. The main difficulty I have is that he is now very good at 'asking' (climbs on knee,pats breast, pulls up/down top, uses own hand-signal for "I want/give me"....throws self into the receive position....in fact everything but unhooking my bra himself). In the afternoon his requests are more frequent and insistent.

Has anyone any advice on how to stop or even cut down further. Do I just need to toughen up and distract more.

I'm returning to work three days a week.

He will drink cows milk and likes it but does not consider it a substitute for boob.

Also, I've heard women say they have bf irregularly, as in not every day, is this even possible?

Thank you.

[CuriousOranj]

Yes, it is possible to breast feed irregularly. I was a single parent and my daughter spent 48hrs at a time away from me, visiting her father at this age. I breast fed her on demand while she was with me. My breasts used to feel a bit full by the time she came home, but it was never uncomfortable or painful and I had no problems with my milk supply.

[Redcagoule]

CuriousOranj, that is really interesting thank you. It really takes the pressure off stopping breastfeeding if it doesn't have to be regular. Out of interest, whilst your daughter was with her dad did he give her formula or expressed milk or give her cows milk in place of the breast feeds she would have from you?

[CuriousOranj]

He gave her cows milk or water to drink. It was really nice after being apart to be able to sit down and have a big cuddle and a breastfeed when she came home. I'm sure it made the separation easier for her (and me).

[Redcagoule]

Thank you Curious, that is really helpful.

[mamato3luvleys]

My 13 month old will not stop feeding even through the night he cries in the cot until I let him feed, my partner works shifts so isn't always around during the night when he wakes up. He will take cows milk during the day but even then he will just throw the cup down and climb on my knees and open or pull down my top saying "boooo". I would really like to stop feeding him now but he has other ideas I fed my older son until he was 19 months old and only got to stop that due to the fact that I was due to have my daughter (there's only 20 months between my older children's ages) does anyone have any tips or advice as I don't feel that I have the willpower to keep rejecting my lovely Lil boy his booby!

[TheRealAmandaClarke]

I bf "irregularly". My dd is 14 mo.
I work 3 days a week. I express at work if I get too full or want to keep some milk for later .
Sometimes I give her a bottle of milk in the afternoons (if I want at Sunday lunch). It doesn't appear to be a problem changing the pattern of feeding.
The tough bit for me is cutting out night feeds but getting there now.

[TheRealAmandaClarke]

I decided I had to stop night feeds.
Or shoot myself in the head.
There's a thread in "sleep" about it actually.
It's been rubbish. And then I just thought omg I have to do this.
She was down to 2 feeds a night (occasionally 3) and I've gone cold turkey. I told her she could have no more mummy milk at night.
I bf her to sleep. In my room. Then I put her in her cot. When she wakes up I cuddle, rock, shhh, distract and offer water/ dummy.
First night was tough. But I just thought I'd see how far I could take it IYSWIM. She cries and fusses but I feel less awful than I might because I'm not leaving her. I'm soothing her through it. Also, there is water in case she's thirsty.
Tonight is night 4. Last night was better than the night before. Fingers crossed.

[TheRealAmandaClarke]

When I pick her up I stay in her room. I'm trying to give the message that we don't bf in there.
For her morning feed I bring her into my room.