Urgent - DD currently screaming because I won't bf her.

(79 Posts)
KingRollo Fri 28-Jun-13 12:46:07

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

How old is she? Six months or so?

Why don't you bf her first and last thing and let her drink water and eat food throughout the day?

Dd was a bottle refuser and nothing ever worked. I wentcold turkey when she was 14 months and I have to say it is my biggest parenting regret, it was an utterly miserable thing for both of us.

maja00 Fri 28-Jun-13 12:51:08

Many breastfed babies won't take bottles of formula from their mums. Personally I would not worry about it so far in advance, keep feeding her and whoever is looking after her can offer formula in your absence.

When I went back to work I fed morning and night and just not in the day. DS was not keen on formula - I did a half and half thing for a bit (ie half breast and half formula) until he got used to it.

Will she drink it out of a cup?

Lancelottie Fri 28-Jun-13 12:52:52

Will she take a cup, with or without lid? Teaspoons of milk?

One of mine never had a bottle either, but was OK if messy with a mug.

haloflo Fri 28-Jun-13 12:53:05

how old is she? has she drunk any water? when are you back at work? I'd probably feed her now and post more so you can get a plan together.

THERhubarb Fri 28-Jun-13 12:54:37

A couple of weeks is ages yet.

Feed her.

Then take a look at the bottle. Is the teat too fast flowing? Or not enough? Is the temperature right? Does she not like the taste of formula?

If you are trying to feed her then she can smell the breastmilk on you and will be confused. Try to get someone else to feed her and see how that goes.

I don't think that "going cold turkey" with a baby is a good idea at all.

KingRollo Fri 28-Jun-13 12:55:52

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

haloflo Fri 28-Jun-13 12:56:37

sorry you said 2 weeks. we still need to know her age? I went back when my DD was 9 months old and I fed morning, teatime, nighttime and during the night. she was fine on food/water all day. when she was 8 months I cut down to just mid morning and mid afternoon during the day, then cut mid morning and eventually just made her wait slightly longer each day til she was able to go 7-5 without milk. No formula necessary. What childcare are you using? Could you leave her for a morning tomorrow to see how they get on. Leave formula or ebm? HTH x

YoniBottsBumgina Fri 28-Jun-13 12:56:48

Feed her for now - it's not worth getting her all distressed over it. She is too small to have a concept of "winning".

Who is going to be looking after her when you are at work? Can they do a practice run without you there? Usually breastfed babies are totally different when you're not around (little sods wink) and will miraculously sleep without BF, accept other forms of milk and basically be a totally different baby.

It's also worth trying the latex (brown) teats rather than clear silicon ones as some breastfed babies seem to prefer them. Again do this when you're not around.

If she's 8 months+ then if she really won't take milk in any other form she will be absolutely fine on solids during the day and BFing at evenings, mornings and weekends. If you still want to wean you can always try again when she's a little bit older and used to getting most of her nutrients from other sources. If under 8 months but she still can't be persuaded to take a bottle you could sneak formula or cow's milk into her food in the form of cheese, yoghurt, cereal, cheese sauces, mixed into purees etc.

KingRollo Fri 28-Jun-13 12:57:31

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haloflo Fri 28-Jun-13 12:58:01

She is quite young but I would say leave mill for the care giver but yes she will be fine without daytime milk. After all some babies sleep 12 hours a night don't they? Well done for getting her to sleep though x

KingRollo Fri 28-Jun-13 12:58:34

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YoniBottsBumgina Fri 28-Jun-13 12:58:54

Your boobs will somehow adapt to doing daytimes just on certain days of the week. Sounds bonkers but it really does work, so you don't need to restrict her during the day if it's too difficult for both of you.

Have you done settling in sessions with CM or nursery yet?

KingRollo Fri 28-Jun-13 12:59:25

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YoniBottsBumgina Fri 28-Jun-13 13:00:29

Yes v common for them to start refusing after previously being happy to take one! Do try the latex teats but get someone else to do it, even if it's DH on an evening or at the weekend while you go out and do something nice for you.

THERhubarb Fri 28-Jun-13 13:00:39

Please don't let her get into a state like this again. I understand your anxiety to get back to work and make her take a bottle but starving her???

She's a baby.

Get someone else to feed her, it might make a huge difference.
Experiment with different teats.
If she's not eating much then perhaps she's not ready for solids yet, every baby is different.
I think you need a morning or afternoon of someone else doing the feeding and see how they get on.

If she's not eating much and not getting enough milk then I'd be concerned tbh.

haloflo Fri 28-Jun-13 13:01:11

Will she take ebm from a cup? You could mix that with formula til its just formula? Change brands of formula? Its hard going back to work but she will be ok.

KingRollo Fri 28-Jun-13 13:02:15

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maja00 Fri 28-Jun-13 13:03:42

It's not necessary to starve her into taking the bottle.

Why not just send milk with her to nursery/CM, and if she needs it she'll take it there?

KingRollo Fri 28-Jun-13 13:03:56

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haloflo Fri 28-Jun-13 13:04:58

Bless your DD kingrollo - id feed her when she wakes and try again over the weekend with your DH. I don't think the you did anything awful though - you are just trying your best.

The only other thing I can think is to leave the cup of formula lying around for her the play with.

KingRollo Fri 28-Jun-13 13:05:22

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

It's a bit hardcore to go cold turkey like that. BF is comfort, not just food to a baby. Even more so if you're going back to work.
I kept feeding mine when I went back to work and they just had beakers of milk when I was away. I could go out in the evenings as I got them used to DH doing bedtime.
BF gradually tailed off and was easier to drop.

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