Falling a sleep

[LittleJack15]

This is me just having a moan about people moaning at me. But why am I not a load to let my 3 month old fall asleep while breastfeeding?
I know I've put a seemlier thread on but just wanted a moan.

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

Who is telling that it isn't ok? What are they saying to you Little?

Have a read of this and if you get any more comments just come out with the old classic "it works for us as a family" and smile and just play bfing bingo while you are smiling

[PoppyWearer]

Ah, just do it anyway. Whatever works. I'm a few years down the line now and sometimes wish I could bf my little angels to sleep now!

Who's counting? Just do what feels right.

[MummyAbroad]

I bought up one child "not letting him sleep" (though ff) and one "letting him sleep (bf) and I got a hell of a lot more rest and sleep myself doing it your way round!

Dont let anyone make you feel bad, if it works for you and your kids, then its not wrong and you dont have to justify it. If you get bored of explaining yourself, you can even lie if you want - sometimes its quicker and easier to nod and say "oh yes I agree", then go do it they way you want

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

I'm a nodder and smiler too, then just carried on as I was

[LittleJack15]

Thank you. It was just close family keep saying he's using u as a dummy and not to let him fall asleep.

[MummyAbroad]

Its so easy for them to say but they arent the ones who would have to be pacing up and down rocking him at 4am. I remember the agony of doing that - it was hell! If you are lucky enough to be able to breastfeed, take full advantage of it, use it to your benefit to get some rest. I still breastfeed my 1.5 year old to sleep and its so easy! People who havent done both ways dont appreciate how HARD it is to get a baby to sleep without a boob (and my first son, used a dummy - doesnt help at all!)

If this family member is going to be around watching you parent, you might want to make the effort to explain to them your choice so they dont keep on at you. If not, just ignore them and carry on!

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

So they know all about bfing and looking after babies do they then?

Just smile and nod, if they push the subject use the "it works for us" line and just carry on if that's what you are happy to do.

Some of the advice I had from close family was downright dangerous, things like "give him a bottle with sone cereal in it so he will sleep" and "don't you think its time he had sone food? Your milk can't be enough", he was 6 weeks old at the time

Unless you have a family who are all BFCs I'd take their comments with a huge pinch of salt.

I found going to a Bfing Support Group once a week helped me a lot.

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

Xposted with abroad. Agree, feeding to sleep is one of the benefits of bfing. You get threads on Mn where the MNer is complaining that their Lo will no longer feed to sleep. Enjoy it while you can

[Nicknamefail]

I don't think it is possible to bf without the baby falling asleep. Also desirable, as others have said.

Jilted, not seen breast feeding bingo before- love it!

[MummyAbroad]

just had a look at Breastfeeding bingo too, thats brilliant OP, how about printing it out and carrying around with you so you can get it out when they start moaning again?

[FlatsInDagenham]

Why do people seem to fight against what comes most naturally to mothers and babies? I can't think of anything lovelier or more natural than what I'm doing right now - feeding my 15 month old DD2 to sleep.

For the record, I did the same for DD1. She was still being fed to sleep at 3 years old. She is now a happy non bf 4yo with no sleep problems.

Take no notice of them.

[Startail]

No idea, I used to let DD2 fall asleep BFing at three years and occasionally at six.

Didn't stop her being perfectly happy to fall asleep in her own when it wasn't convenient to have a snuggle on the sofa.

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

Agree with flats as well. Both of mine were bf to sleep for a long time. Both are now older, go to their own bed happily and are fast alert while I Mn and get pissed

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

Yeah, also don't know why people fight this. You could always feed the baby, pass Lo over and say, ok, show me what to of

[HadALittleFaithBaby]

I have 10 week old DD. I try to encourage her to nap in the day without feeding to sleep - this generally involves using the sling, pushchair or car! But at night she settles by feeding to sleep and cuddling with me. Sleep training will happen when she's older. All advice on sleep training says 6 months at the earliest but really not til 1 year. Tell people that! Sounds like you're doing a great job :)

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

There may be no need for sleep training at all Had. Both of mine sleep beautifully and no sleep training involved

There is some good information on normal infant sleep here and here. If you do want to encourage sleep some parents find that taking Lo outside for a time each day, there are also some good tips here. You might also find Babycalming helpful as it helps you to find your own routine. For sleep books try No Cry Sleep Solution and Sound Sleep by Sarah Woodhouse. Your library might have all of these books

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

Sorry thread doesn't quite flow properly, I blame constant interruptions from dd. How dare the DC want attention

[audweb]

I have to be honest, I let my DD fall asleep on the boob, but sometimes when she's full, she'll come off and then nod off on her own accord - that even happens in the middle of the night. I just figure she's little, and we'll figure it out later - and surely, the comfort and security she's getting at the minute from me will stand us in good stead for sleeping without the boob when she reaches an age where bfing to sleep is no longer an option. Obviously, as she is my first, I have no basis for this lol. And I'm also lazy - at 4am I don't want stress, I just want to give her my boob and fall asleep!

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

Exactly aud

[HadALittleFaithBaby]

jilted yes I should add if necessary!

aud at 4am it is my full intention to feed her, fill her and get back to sleep!

[MummyAbroad]

Yes aud, mine does this too (at night) he will feed, get drowsey then roll off me and get himself in a comfy position to sleep.

[LittleJack15]

I'm so glad to hear that I'm not doing the wrong thing. Thank you.

[arwen72t]

My 6 month old ds feeds to sleep but if he wakes being put in his moses basket he will self settle quite happily. I put this down to him feeling so secure because he is fed on demand. It is a 1000 x easier than trying to keep them awake which I dementedly did with my older two and he sleeps better than either of them did.go with what works for you, why make life difficult!

[LifeOfPee]

Womankind has been given the gift of being able to instantly calm and soothe their babies off to sleep with a breastfeed. Why would anyone choose to ignore or attempt to alter this perfect situation? It makes no sense!

A breastfeed is the perfect de-brief for any situation, a magic button to make everything OK again and send your baby off to the land of nod.

Safely ignore all comments to the contrary OP, you're doing alright

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

One of my family members was very keen on the Baby whisperer and was adamant that her baby would not be fed to sleep. 8 years later I don't think she has still had a full nights sleep...