Tongue tie advice and experiences

[Cupcakemummy85]

Valentines day I had my beautiful dd2 and an very thrilled but unfortunately we hit a little bump in the road with the feeding. My dd seems to have a slight tongue tie and it's making feeding her really quite painful. She wants to feed all the time at the moment which is tough as I'm really sore. We have an appointment with the tongue tie clinic at my hospital on Wednesday but that is three days away. Any tips on how I can make it more comfortable to feed until then and any experiences with tongue tie? I'm also really super nervous about them to 'the cut'. Whenever dd cries it just breaks me thanks everyone

[Kookikoo]

Hi, I can relate to everything you've put as I have 2 sons, both of whom were born with a moderate tongue tie. With ds1 (born 3 years ago) it wasn't noticed until he was a couple of days old and I'd found feeding really difficult. Every nurse/midwife had different ways of holding him to really emphasise the latch but I got so sore, he was constantly screaming as he was not getting full feeds so he wouldn't settle and he lost so much weight & got really jaundice he got referred to the hospital for that. I persevered exclusively breastfeeding for 2 weeks but it was really not working as he was not getting enough milk that I had to introduce formula and he took to the bottle easily and did really well after. Nothing was ever offered to help with his tongue tie and I felt such a failure that I could not get the hang of breastfeeding despite so many midwifes showing me techniques but I was just glad to see him thriving when I introduced the bottle. So when ds2 was born last Oct with exactly the same tongue tie I was really nervous about the feeding. Again in hospital I was well supported and assured I was doing well but I could tell he was not getting full feeds&Ididn't want to go down the same route as with ds1 that I introduced the bottle within a couple of days of getting home. This time though the hosptial now offer having the tongue tie cut. Unfortunately this took a couple of weeks to organise & the hospital would only do it if I was breastfeeding so I had to combine breast&bottle until he had the cut. I was really nervous about him having the procedure but it was so straightforward and all over in a few mins and the benefits are instant. He cried for a minute after having it done but my hospital recommend feeding him straight after and I really could tell that it was much more comfortable as he was not pulling and pinching anywhere near as much and after a few days he was able to extend his tongue normally, so my advice is definitely get the procedure done!

[McBaby]

My LO had had tongue tie and despite awful pain we are now mostly pain free :) and still going at six months.

The cut is very quick and being swaddled and held in place is more distressing than the cut its self in my experience. She was feeding within 30 seconds.

I would just take it one feed at a time to get through till Wednesday however you can. Paracetamol and ibuprofen were my friends along with moist healing to help heal and soothe nipples - I used jelonet and vasaline (as allergic to lanolin) I also fould hot showers soothing. And experiment with bra, no bra, top, breast shellsetc to find the most comfortable way to get through. I did this for 8 weeks till tongue tie was finally diagnosed!

Also be aware once its cut there is a very small chance scar tissue can form causing pain again so make sure you go back to tongue tie clinic! I persevered for a few more weeks thinking it would get better but it didn't.

[Cupcakemummy85]

I had a breast feeding nurse come over yesterday and said it was my positioning and they probably won't do the cut cause its only slight tongue tie. but after a whole night of literally no sleep and constant feeding my nipples are now so sore I cry out in pain if I breastfeed. I'm so upset. Everyone tries to help with positioning but it's not making a difference. It's really effecting the way I'm feeling and I just keep getting upset. My poor dd1 isn't getting any time withe cause I'm constantly feeding and too tired to do anything. Why won't my newborn settle at night with a good feed? And she is so windy!! Is that down to the tongue tie too? The breastfeeding woman said it was the latch. I was ready to slap her if I'm honest lol

[BuntyCollocks]

There's no such thing as a slight tie. It should be revised. Positioning is important, but even a 'slight tie' can affect the range of motion of the tongue.

Both my children had ties missed and it makes me so angry at the lack of help for mums whose children have ties. They push breastfeeding but are then reluctant to revise them when it can make all the difference between them continuing to feed and quitting.

Fwiw my DS had his clipped 3 times and we will be getting the tongue and a lip tie sorted when he's older again (tongue tie keeps regrowing) - he's 2 now and they won't do it without a ga

Dd had a posterior tie revised at 11 days which has regrown and we are going to John Roberts at cote royd to have laser revision of the tie and lip tie done on the 28th. It is important from a speech and dental point of view. Do NOT be fobbed off. Go private if you must. But I bet it'll help your pain and the milk transfer.

My sons tie being missed for so long resulted in a huge weight loss, readmission, my milk supply tanking to the point we had to supplement.

[JackieBFC]

So sorry you have hit problems with tongue tie - I agree that there is no such thing as a slight tongue-tie if mother and or baby are having feeding difficulties. Tweaking the position may help with comfort for the next day or so and trying to avoid further nipple trauma is important. Any position where baby if more on top of the breast (rather than underneath it as in the traditional cross body positions like cradle-hold) may help. So try a laid back biological nurturing position so baby's weight is more on top of you and she is more face down, this gives the tongue a little more length as it does not drop back in the mouth and also gravity will help keep baby's head on the breast not sliding down the nipple. Keep an eye on baby's wees and poos - if there is any concern that baby is not feeding well enough consider expressing and feeding expressed breast milk - this is important in terms of stimulating and maintaining your supply as well as to feed your lo. Lots of luck and do go and get a proper assessment and division of the tongue tie as soon as you can.

[PhyllisDoris]

My DH has tongue tie. I have no idea how he fed when he was a baby as DMIL is no longer with us, and I never thought to ask when she was alive. It was obviously not treated in any way as he still has it - he can't stick his tongue out, but he is a healthy 49 year old, so they obviously managed somehow.

(Not much help I know!

[PhyllisDoris]

PS - there is nothing wrong with DH's speech or teeth either.

[Kookikoo]

Sounds like you're feeling exactly as I did with both my sons. With ds1 I persevered cos I didn't know any better as it was my first child so I didn't know what was normal and nothing was offered to help with the tongue tie and every midwife had their own opinion on what was the best position. With ds2 as soon as they said he had a tongue tie (straight after birth) we had a visit from the bf support nurse and she recommended a really exaggerated latch, where it seemed like I had to shove my boob right into the baby's mouth. It's all about getting them to open their mouth as wide as possible by giving them a smell of the milk, then getting as much of the nipple and surrounding brown bit in, with the nipple pointing up to the back roof of baby's mouth. She also recommended hand expressing and cup feeding expressed milk. I was determined to bf this time after having to mix feed ds1 after 2 weeks because of the tongue tie, but because I had had such bad experiences with ds1 it all came back and from the start I just felt like I couldn't do it because it is sooo painful because half the time the baby isn't latched on properly and they just chew you to pieces! In hospital I had a nurse sitting with me for over an hour in the middle of the night watching me feed, said I'd done it right, baby fell asleep, woke up 10 minutes later demanding to be fed again! At that point I didn't have confidence that anyone could help! When I got home on day 2 I just couldn't bear the thought of having to feed him 8 times a day when I was so sore and my partner was very supportive of my decision to mix feed as we didn't want him to lose weight and suffer as my first had. Every day I was breastfeeding I was in tears at the pain and it really does affect the way I felt towards my baby. Every time he cried and did his hungry sign I just dreaded it. I had to keep up the bf to get his tie cut and it ended up that I was bf him, expressing, cup feeding him & using ff, it just took up all my time and made me so upset. It was such a long 2 weeks to get it cut but after the cut I chickened out and mainly just ff him cos my supply was so low and I am mentally scarred! Good luck to you, hang in there and really push for the cut, the support of my family got me through it.

[BigPigLittlePig]

You poor thing, dd was premature, and at breastfeeding support group (where they routinely check for tt) I was told she didn't have a tt. Feeding was ok(ish) until 6 weeks, when she was feeding hourly, screaming, windy. At the 6 week check, my bloody marvellous gp said she had a moderate tt and booked her in to have it cut the next week. Without the knowledge that that was booked I would have given up, as it was so painful/frustrating/upsetting. The guidelines are for tt to be snipped if it is interfering with feeding. If lots of help with your latch is still not improving it then be stroppy/bolshy and push for it - it is a safe procedure, and relatively painless. As someone has said, the babies mainly cry at the indignation of being restrained to have it done. Good luck

[monstergoose]

Can I hijack this thread a little please?my lo is 4d old and she has a slight tongue tie according to the midwife. She seems to be feeding frequently and long enough most of the tone but she is do eindhoven and keeps bringing up milk quite a long time after a feed. Could the tongue tie be causing the windiest?

[monstergoose]

'windiness' ! Stupid I phone posting early! Would you all still recommend getting it snipped?

[BuntyCollocks]

In a word, yes, monster. It can cause the windiness and I'd get it snipped.

[Cupcakemummy85]

It's the same situation with mine monster. My dd is 5d and 'slight tongue tie' she is also pretty windy. After all the help with positioning I just don't feel it's helping with the pain. It's more a pinching feeling now. I'm feeling really sensitive at the moment so I'm really worried I will have a massive breakdown if they do decide to cut. She screams just having her nappy changed :(

[McBaby]

Take some one to the hospital appointment with you the moral support kept me calm. There distress is no worse than there injections.

[monstergoose]

I get a pain too when she latches on initially which is a real sharp pain but that then settles to a feeling rather than pain if that makes sense! Feeding goes really well in the day with longer gaps but nights are a struggle as she's feeding every 90 mins for about 20 mins at a time which doesn't leave much sleep space when I need to wind her after every breast as well! I'm going to go to our baby cafe on thurs where they'll decide if she will have it cut or not. Hope you're getting on ok cupcake, my lo also screams through each change although tonight we have got through1 change without crying.

[Cupcakemummy85]

I completely feel your pain monster. Last night I had to cave in and give her a bottle. I tried to express but she had fed so much I could only pump 1oz. Normally I would have a lie in in the morning but I'm seeking refuge downstairs with my dd1, watching tv. I feel as though at night I'm a human dummy. It's so painful I'm crying out in pain at first, then it's fine, then it gets worse. With dd1 I pumped, ff, and gave breast for two months and then ebf until she was 8 months, I could've done longer but I had to go on medication. I would feel so guilty if I couldn't feed dd2 with the breast but I don't feel I can carry on. My whole breast is starting to hurt. I feel like I litreally haven't stopped crying because of this f-ing breast feeding.

[aamia]

Get it cut privately. We did with our DS and it made all the difference in the world!

[aamia]

And to reassure you there is a little cry then all done, and your baby will then feed without crying or wind.

[Cupcakemummy85]

We have an appointment today so we will see what they say but if not I might consider it. I really enjoy bf with dd1. With all my emotions about not spending as much time with dd1 and the problems with feeding I don't feel like I'm bonding at all with dd2.

[McBaby]

Good luck with appointment today. Don't worry about the formula you have just done what you needed to get through! Fingers crossed they can cut today and the pain eases when feeding going forwards.

[monstergoose]

Good luck cupcake, I hope you get sorted today x

[Cupcakemummy85]

Unfortunately it didnt really sort anything, breastfeeding still painful so am pumping and formula feeding now with a bit of breast. Feel like such a failure at the moment. Really down about the whole situation. No matter what midwives help me they can't seem to understand why I'm still in pain. And my little girl is such a hungry baby I'm literally feeding all night and screaming in pain. I don't want to dred feeding her. I want to enjoy her but feel like complete shit about it.

[McBaby]

Give it some time it should get less painful each day as you heal and LO learns to use there tongue. If no significant improvement in a week get the tie rechecked they occasionally need cutting further back if is a posterior tie or if scar tissue forms quickly.

It was about two weeks after her cut I suddenly realised feeding didn't hurt any more and was enjoyable.

[PollyIndia]

I had terrible trouble with breastfeeding for the first 7 weeks. Bleeding/cracked nipples, mastitis, vasospasm, crying at every feed. DS had a slight tongue tie diagnosed at 2 weeks. The HV told me to work on the latch and have cranial osteopathy, which we did, but still excruciating. In fact, there is a thread on here somewhere when I was ready to quit. Thinking I should try everything before giving up, we had the TT cut privately (£80, came to my house). For 2 weeks it got worse as he relearned his latch but then I had 2 more sessions of osteopathy at the OCC in London (a charity, so you pay what you want), and overnight, it was pain free. He's now 19 weeks and I honestly love breastfeeding. The time it took for him to feed also went from about 30 mins to 10 mins per breast and now is down to 5.

So, give it a bit of time and maybe try the cranial osteopathy. I felt the sameq as you when things didn't immediately get better, but worse. Fingers crossed things work out for you.

[monstergoose]

I'm sorry to hear things havent proved straight away cupcake. From what other people say though it sounds like things might improve ? Still, if it's so painful in the mean time then I can totally understand switching to bottles. Does it hurt to pump or is that ok? We went to the baby cafe today to be assessed and they've arranged an urgent referral to have the tie cut, which should be Either this or next tues.I'm really relieved as its getting progressively more painful each feed so really hoping i don't have to wait 10 days! On the plus side we are having less screamy changes so some things are improving!