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Any advice/way to change DS (12wks) feeding every 2-3 hours at night?(18 Posts)
DS barely eats in the day (3 times at most) and when he does he never takes more than 3oz. He is putting on weight and seems healthy enough but at night he wants 2-3 oz every 2-3 hours. So he has a feed at midnight, then 3, then 6 then about 10am and then about 2pm then 7ish. He is 14lb 6oz but i don't think he is eating enough.
He also seems to barely sleep. midnight-7ish then a 1 hour sleep in the day.
Does this sound normal?
Everyone else i know has a baby who sleeps about 14 hours a day and takes about 6-8oz at each feed.
I'm not sure about oz intake as I BF but it does sound as bit like he has day/night mixed up. I would get lots of daylight, offer feeds every 2-3 hrs in the day and make sure you watch out for sleep cues in the day to try to get more napping.
He will only sleep on me, so that's why his naps are fewer i think - because every time i try to lay him down he wakes up.
I would feeding him more in the day, and reducing little by little the quantity you give him at feeds in the night. After only 1 night of reduced feeding he would make up for it in the day.
i bf at night, but he is only on there for 5-7 mins and i only feed from one boob so i can't imagine he gets more than 3oz. i express, bf and ff in the day so i can see how much he is taking. He often refuses the breast in the day.
He also has had terrible reflux (but that seems to have got better over the last week) so i am wondering if he is not taking much due to that. But then i would expect him to feed more often, to make up for it. He seems utterly uninterested in food tbh. He is always standing up and looking around and acts as if food is just an annoying distraction from looking at stuff. He has never 'asked' for food, i am constantly offering it to him and he reluctantly takes it. I have tried waiting for him to cry for it, but he never does and after 6 hours i offer it to him.
You say he wants feeding every 2-3 hours through the night, but isn't interested in the day in feeding, I would think this is probably because he is feeding all night. 6 hours is far too long in the day between feeds in the day.
You say he is uninterested in food and never 'asks' for it but he wakes very often through the night for food? So he is interested just at the wrong time, as I said you need to try and adjust it by reducing night time feeding and upping the daytime feeds.
It sound like he has a great set up for the night of feeding and sleeping on you which is now becoming a problem as the weeks go on, he needs to learn to settle himself to sleep, which in turn will help to get him to feed less at night and more in the day.
But really I would just start by feeding him all day long, over and over, he will probably then show less interest in feeding at night, then you can be sure he is not hungry all night and tackle the issue of him only sleeping on you.
Can you suggest any tips to get him to eat in the day when he doesn't want to? i seem to spend my life shoving my boob in his face only for it to be refused or if i do force him to take some he just throws it all up.
And i know what you are saying Thoughts, but even tho he eats 3 times in the night he still only takes 2-3 oz so it isn't like he's filling up to keep him going.
You say he weighs 14lb 6oz and is gaining weight well so must be getting enough milk, and if you say he doesn't want to feed in the day or throws much of it up then what he gets at night must be a substantial part of his intake.
I would start with feeding all day, I think it can be misleading how much has been thrown up and actually they may have kept quite a bit down. Then at night don't keep feeding him every 2-3 hours.
Personally at 3 months I'd see if say at 3am you could leave him a bit when he wakes and see if he can go back to sleep it may take a while, but if he is waking from hunger it would instantly mean that at the next feed he would take more, and even if he woke again before 6 for this feed you are reducing the night feeding and trying to get on to a better schedule.
You also say he doesn't sleep until midnight, really?
yep at the earliest 11pm, he's wide awake now, chatting away and laughing. he slept for 30 mins 6.10-6.40pm and then 20 mins at 8pm but that's it.
Are you happy with that? I'm sure it would be better for him to be in bed
So when did you last feed him?
he had 3oz about an hour ago. i'm trying to get more down him now but he pulls his head away and clamps his mouth shut, he cries and gets upset. If i put him to bed when he's not asleep he screams. If i put him to bed when he is asleep he wakes up about 30 mins later and screams till i bring him into bed with me.
If it was me I'd get tough it will only get worse. How long have you left him crying if you put him to bed awake? Or how long have you left him if he wakes when he comes in his light sleep after 30 minutes?
Refluxers may need to be fed little and often at night be Aude they're lying down, especially if a lot of the day is spent in arms or a bouncer which is more upright. The swallowing action keeps the acid down and helps empty the stomach.
What are his sleeping arrangements (other than on you!)? Can you prop the head of the basket/cot up?
It sounds like he's not sleeping enough and getting overtired
well i have never left him alone when he sleeps so i am always in the same room. If i try to take him to the bedroom when he naps he wakes and screams so i let him nap in the living room with me. I have probably never let him cry for longer than 5 mins. I wasn't planning to do 'controlled crying' and am ambivalent about leaving babies to cry.
He has never gone into his moses basket. He hated it. He immediately rolled on his side and kicked the edge till it almost toppled off the stand. He is very tall with massive hands and feet so kept hitting the edges and waking himself up.
We had a terrible birth and i was in hospital with him for a while, and then when i came home i was so unwell and sore that i couldn't keep getting up to get him out of the basket. So i let him sleep on me. Then when we tried to get him into the basket he was having none of it. Also i do all the feeds/sleeps alone as DP works long hours so sleeps in another room, or is often away.
Yes I know people have mixed views on leaving babies to cry, but personally I think for a young baby to sleep well and perhaps more importantly learn to settle themselves it is fine. Obviously I don't mean for hours, but I hear time and time again that much older babies won't sleep well as they have never learnt to go to sleep on their own, and the parents are now wondering what to do, I'd say don't miss the boat now!
*That was leaving them to cry for hours.
Yes, i think i am veering towards that view myself. I was thinking when DP is home for a couple of weeks over xmas we may tackle it together so one can be on duty while the other gets some sleep.
I may buy the no cry sleep techniques book i heard about.
I am part of an nct group and we meet up and they can't believe the way he just sits up/stands up all the time - even after we all go swimming when their babies are knackered and sleeping, mine is jiggling about on my lap trying to walk.
Thanks for the advice.
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