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Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Infant feeding

just one bottle for breast feeding baby

21 replies

jumble · 13/09/2005 22:27

my 12 week old totally breast fed baby is gagging when i try to give her a bottle of expressed milk. i have tried avent and nuk teats but the reaction is the same. i am going to a friends 'no children' wedding in two weeks and am anxious to leave her with my parents for at least one feed. she is currently feeding two hourly through the day and sleeps 12 hours at night with one or two feeds. i don't want to disrupt this pattern. any ideas?

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Passionflower · 13/09/2005 22:55

Sorry to have to say this, but on my own experience you may have left it too late at 12 weeks. I know of people that have had no probs offering a bottle at 12 weeks or later but my first 2 DD's wouldn't even consider it. DD3 was offered a bottle at 6 weeks and was no prob with mixed feeding. Just wish I'd had the courage with the first 2. I had to go cold turkey with breast to get the first 2 to take a bottle, it was a nightmare.

I expect there'll be loads of posts saying I'm talking crap and offering proper advice though so don't worry too much.

berolina · 13/09/2005 23:32

give her the feed in a cup? (I'm not the expert on this, but I think they sort of 'lap it up').

suzywong · 13/09/2005 23:59

although I have heard it can be done, my experience is the same as Passionflower's

however I have also heard that babies, when they realise mum isn't going to whip them out, just get on with taking their milk from whichever carer and delivery system is on hand- they're not daft.

If it's only one feed you are leaving her for I wouldn't stress about it and leave it to your parents (who afterall do know a thing or too about babies) to sort it out and make sure you aren't too tanked up to give her a nice long feed when you pick her up

HTH

bobbybob · 14/09/2005 00:40

It's one feed she will get over it. If she's gagging could the teats be too fast for her?

chipmonkey · 14/09/2005 01:28

Passionflower, my ds3 regularly had bottles from birth and still refused at the 3 months mark. At that stage some of them decide what they prefer. My other two were rarely given bottles and they never refused.
Jumble, the best success we had were with MAM ultivent teats. They fit the Avent bottles but are better than the Avent teats for small babies as they are slightly flattened. Another thing that I did on Mears advice was to hold the baby facing away from me so he didn't look for the boob. I also walked around and sang, you may or may not need to do this.
As berolina says, they will also lap it from a cup. The lid of the Avent bottle is ideal. Medela also do special cups with a lip for this purpose but I'm not sure if you would need something so specialised.

chipmonkey · 14/09/2005 01:30

btw, I did have to wait till he was starving before he would take the bottle. It took 4 hours in our case!

Gracesmum · 14/09/2005 02:13

i had same problem with my dd, HV said to let someone else feed her as she would smell my milk, also feed when hungry but not that starving that has no patient to try. if you have ever seen the baby whisperer, she recommends the haberman feeder which releases milk depending upon speed of babys sucking, these are available from medela.

Gillso · 14/09/2005 17:16

I think the idea of having someone else feed her is definitely worth a try - worked for me.

Passionflower · 14/09/2005 17:53

Have to add that I have personal hatred of the trend for 'no children' weddings. IMO the point of getting married is to celebrate your relationship and commitment to each other with your friends and family, and children shouldn't be excluded from this. My oldest friend wanted me to be her bridesmaid while I was still feeding DD2 and I told her 'if my baby isn't welcome then I won't do it'. If it was anyone other than my very oldest friend I would have insisted on DD1 being welcome too.

Sorry to rant / thread hijack but it's one of my pet hates.

bobbybob · 14/09/2005 20:09

I think no children wedding shouldn't be no baby weddings. A 14 week old will just eat and sleep anyway.

Ah, but then they'd have to be no smoking weddings!

Roxswood · 14/09/2005 21:05

I had a no smoking wedding! My relatives hated me but I loved that my dress didn't smell afterwards! I had two babies, two small children and three young teenagers at my wedding and they made it so much fun! I remember hearing a toddler chatting all through our vows and we were all laughing aloud through the ceremony it was lovely.
I don't understand the no children rule, and I would refuse to go if I was invited but not my little one.. but I obviously don't have a problem upsetting people, I made my guests stand in the rain for a cigarette!

Passionflower · 14/09/2005 21:13

Agree Roxwood, it wasn't really relevant to my wedding but given a choice I'd much rather have a no smoking wedding than a no children one.

jumble · 15/09/2005 12:17

Thanks for the advice, am going to try leaving DH with expressed milk (and DD2!) and taking the dog out. then I won't be able to get stressed at the screaming but will be near enough to return quickly if they both get in a state. As regards the no children wedding, it was lovely to hear that others feel it is a shame too. I have not said anything for fear of upsetting the friends concerned, but am secretly quite upset and insulted that our children have been exclided from something that I too see as a celebration of love and family life.

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lovecloud · 15/09/2005 12:22

hello

i tried all teats with my dd and in the end the only teat she was successful with was Superdrugs own brand 3 for 75p (yellow latex ones) - proper old skool.

compared to avent they are so soft just like the nipple. i suggested them to another friend who tried all teats and they suited her baby too.

you can just buy a couple of cheap mothercare bottles or supermarket bottles - the slim tall ones.

if it does not work at least you only wasted a few pound.

goodluck x

TracyK · 15/09/2005 12:25

How long will you be away from dd from? can your parents not bring the baby to the hotel and meet you for a feed? won't you have to express anyway - may as well feed dd??

jumble · 15/09/2005 13:20

TracyK, Hoping to be away from baby for the ceremony and reception dinner,(3 or 4 hours?) then plan to either go home, or feed baby in carpark, courtesy of parents transporting her there, as wedding venue has no facilities. What I'm worried about is mainly frequency of feeding during the day at the moment, and guilt at leaving her with nothing for over three hours. Its a 40 minute drive from home to the wedding. Would be so much easier to just be able to leave her at home for the whole afternoon with bottles. As far as expressing on the day, am simply going to make sure I get in lots of photo's with my fantastically enhanced cleavage towards the end! ('normal' boobs are on the small side!)

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tiggyhop · 15/09/2005 14:25

Hi there
With DS1 I gave him a bottle of expressed milk from about 3 weeks old, he absolutely refused the bottle at 12 weeks. We did the screaming bit, everything. He never accepted a teat again. So I got one of those Avent cup attachments, removed the valve, and just poured it in to him basically (in particular when we had the same problem as you and had to go to a wedding when he was 4 months old). He finally got the hang of sucking on the avent cup thing with the valve in it when I weaned him at 6 months and had one ever since (at least it meant he was not precious about the bottle!).

bobbybob · 15/09/2005 15:48

The venue has no facilities - what no reception? No garden area? Is it a hotel - could you get a room?

starlover · 15/09/2005 15:50

someone may have already said this, but what size teat are you using? make sure it's the slowest you can get.
milk comes out much faster from a bottle...

starlover · 15/09/2005 15:50

someone may have already said this, but what size teat are you using? make sure it's the slowest you can get.
milk comes out much faster from a bottle...

jumble · 16/09/2005 21:32

A reprieve at the eleventh hour! Both children have now been included in invitation. Am hugely relieved and now looking forward to the day. Both go to sleep at 7-7.30pm, so will be collected and put to bed and me and dh will be able to dance the night away for a couple of hours for the first time since dd2 was born! Thanks for all advice, will persevere at a less hectic rate with the odd bottle, but the pressure is off!

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