Bloody f**king nora. Just weighed myself and I want to die.

(1000 Posts)

I can't even bring myself to type in my weight because I am so ashamed sad

I need to lose 3.5 stone before the end of May (going on holiday with a thin friend) I am doing My Fitness Pal (calorie counting) and I am going to do 1200 calories a day. It's brutal I know but then so was the reading on my scales this morning.

Effing Nora sad

nilbyname Mon 07-Jan-13 12:19:15

Try the Shred, hard as fuck, but you get results.

If you are hungry, have a glass of water then go and brush your teeth.

I need to lose a stone at least. Arsefaces.

everlong Mon 07-Jan-13 12:19:17


It's doable. Hard work but you can achieve it. Once that first 7 days is past you will be ok.

Where you going in May anywhere nice?

TheDeadlyDonkey Mon 07-Jan-13 12:19:51

If you have an iPhone or ipad, download the virtual gastric band hypnosis app - it's very good!

bedmonster Mon 07-Jan-13 12:21:30

At least you've got on the scales. I'm not going anywhere near mine grin
And now you can start to change. 1200 cals sounds like far too little but when I was on it, I had yog and berries (no honey), soup for lunch (no bread) and a sensible dinner (smaller portions), and even a couple of pieces of fruit and a little treat most days (couple of jaffa cakes, few squares of dark choc).
I also find planning my days food helps as it saves those desperately hungry scrabbles around in the cupboard. Also make sure you stay busy. I iron, organise photos, read, walk to see friends etc in the evenings when I would normally reach for a snack or glass of wine.

Good luck.

Join us on motivational monday thread
Good luck with MFP
I started at 16s6 and the weight dropped off to begin with - it really gave me motivation just when I needed it
You can do it btw

The Shred brings me out in hoves just thinking of it. Am going to start power-walking, 30 minutes a day, when DS is back at school. I am going to do it at night though so that no one can see me waddling about the streets like a demented weeble.

I am going to Puglia, everlong.

I have planned out my meals for today (have done the 1200 calories before and didn't find it too much of a struggle) I have had 2 boiled eggs for breakfast and a cup of fennel tea, am having cous cous for lunch with spiced vegetables and harissa chicken and bulgar wheat salad for dinner. That leaves me with 240 calories for snacks if I need them, have got oatcakes/flax seed cakes etc in stock.

RalphGnu Mon 07-Jan-13 12:25:57

I weighed myself at MIL's on Boxing Day and was mortified. I have never weighed as much as I do now. I reckon I need to lose at least 4 stone, but the gym's out of the question as I would have nobody to look after DS while I went.

The thought of the shred brings me out in a cold sweat. Is there any way of exercising and dieting that involves sitting down and eating crisps?

no but shred is 20mins of pain & listening to her annoying phrases then you get to sit down

Thanks SPB for the encouragement smile How much have you lost now and how long have you been doing it?

Getting on the scales has made me angry tbh. Angry at myself for letting myself become such a hambeast. sad But angers spurs you forward I think so this is good.

I know how you feel sad I feel and look like a right bloater, alongside My Fitness Pal I really want to do the Couch to 5k, but I'm scared.
Sorry for hijacking Baubles, I hate feeling so fat and unfit.

Ralph I have recorded Chairobics on the fitness channel. Shall I report back when I have looked at it?grin

Yes, I remember being angry!
Lost almost 5 and a half stone, I've been doing it since last July which I realise is a long time but I lost a lot of weight very quickly, so worth doing for me even if I'd stuck at say 14stone. I am now hovering around the 11st mark and have grown too small for trousers I on;y dreamed of wearing at the beginning.
Do it. 3.5 stone may seem like a lot to lose but half a stone doesn't and that in itself will be worthwhile. I think I lost 6lb in my first week!

RalphGnu Mon 07-Jan-13 12:30:19

Ooh yes please! Chairobics sounds right up my street grin

Hijack away. We can support each other.

I have just thrown all of the leftover christmas chocolates in the bin and then emptied leftover mashed potato from last night all over them to ensure i don't go into the bin and scoff them out of the bin ahem

RalphGnu Mon 07-Jan-13 12:30:51

SPB, that's awesome, well done you!

or, without wanting to sound unwelcoming, start a support thread of your own since there seem to be a few of you starting now. Imagine what it could be like this time next year. Even by end of Feb you could have lost over a stone.

Willowme Mon 07-Jan-13 12:31:32

Mfp is great if you stick to it you will get results! Assuming it's the start of May you will need to loose over 2 pounds a week which is do-able and some weeks you might even loose more.

Good luck!!

That's amazing, SPB. What have you been doing exactly? <shuffles closer to SPB>

5.5 stone from July to now is incredible!

Wow I am fierce and bossy today
<kicks butts>

List all the reasons you need to do this. For me it was a diabetes scare (all in my own mind, bu I realised the next one probably wouldn't be). I was having joint pain. I realised I wa heading towards that age where I could be one of those unlucky young people to have a heart attack. I was wearing the 'least worst' item in my wardrobe.

no no sorry July 2011

RalphGnu Mon 07-Jan-13 12:34:08

Where's the Monday motivational thread SPB?

That's still remarkable, SPB, less than 2years. And you've done it healthily I bet?

I AM just going to do it. For definite.

Hullygully Mon 07-Jan-13 12:35:26

<sniggers at weeble buppy and ignores own scales and shrunken clothes>

I have today thrown all of xmas in the bin. It's a start.

Right, I started on MFP in April 2012 (was on foodfocus before)
When I started I was 200lb - so 14st4
I am now just under 11st2.

YEAH HULLY it's a start.

Know your enemy. Mine are all in the bin covered in discarded mash.

Hullygully Mon 07-Jan-13 12:38:28

I threw out unopened boxes of mince pies. I know it was very wrong, really I do, but it was that or explode

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Mon 07-Jan-13 12:38:45

I had exactly the same feeling last year buppy - 2nd January I weighed 12 stone 3, so I went on a diet. I did the low carb thing - it was really, really easy.

I hadto go back on steroids a few times which buggered it up, but I stuck to in broadly and was down to 9 stone 11 just before Christmas (put half a stone on - which is 99% stollen - over Christmas so will probably go back to low carbing again for a few weeks to lose it again.

Have you had a look at BIWI's Low carb bootcamp threads? They are really helpful.

Don't despair - you have something to aim for, I am sure you will lose the weight.

motivational monday please do join us grin Or start your own if you prefer, the initial drive is like nothing else grin
Good thing about support threads on here i've found is there is no competition, apart from the friendly sort.

Hullygully Mon 07-Jan-13 12:40:06

Oh shut up you eight foot tall stick thin thing
I've met you, remember?

juneybean Mon 07-Jan-13 12:40:28

Hijack, SPB that's brilliant! I can't wait to see you!! Any hints, I've got 45lbs to lose by July am using mfp

Hullygully Mon 07-Jan-13 12:40:32

Ah, should have read the post first,

soz, gerrof

as you were

I made a cake wth the kids which wasn't actially very nice (betty crocker red velvet btw). It just tasted of nothing. Kids weren't bothered either so rather than having it sitting there looking at me, I threw it out - that is something I really struggle to do.

I can't no/low-carb GetOrf. I just know it. I think I would rather weigh carbs and as long as I stick to within my 1200 cals, then I can have them. LOL at 99% stollen! grin

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Mon 07-Jan-13 12:42:04

Yes, but you never met me when I was in the midst of steroid bloat - I looked like illustrations of Moon Face in old copies of the Faraway Tree. grin Hence the need for the diet in the first place (look at state of face, get depressed, eat entire loaf of bread and pate)

oh no juney is going to out me grin

WHat's happening in July btw? I am 44Katy on MFP if you fancy being friends (juney or friends with me!)

juneybean Mon 07-Jan-13 12:43:06

Will definitely add you, got a weeklong hen party in July then after hoping to TTC!

I am not deliberately low carbing but on MFP tend to find I'm under on carbs and over on protein. Mind you the people who log aren't always that accurate - I remember once enjoying a plate of completely carb-free pasta grin

weeklong hen party
bloody hell

OK just read to the end of your message, sorry, how exciting grin
Think I might PM you

" I looked like illustrations of Moon Face in old copies of the Faraway Tree"


I look like a slug. I was framing some pictures yesterday and I found one of me in June two years ago. I had an sharp jaw, shiney hair, bright skin... now I look like a sad slug. The same colour, too. Bah.

The mash is a good plan. I've sent all of our remaining Christmas crap into work with DH, his colleagues can get fat off it and I miserable.
I understand the rage, I am so fucking pissed off with myself, I look hideous, I look pregnant and I'm not I am just a big wobbly flab bag.

By the power of Mumsnet, we can all do this!

juneybean Mon 07-Jan-13 12:45:54

Haha I know, the hens parents have an apartment in turkey, so I'm looking at it as a holiday!

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Mon 07-Jan-13 12:46:07

x post hully grin

Ah, can you not do the lowcarb thang? I never did it religiously, as it was not a good idea for my kidneys to go into ketosis, however I just shied away from bread, pasta, rice and spuds. Ate a load of other decent carby stuff.

MFP is really good as well. I think cal counting to 1200 cals is a good idea. I got a bit excited when I started low carbing and ate blocks of cheese the size of my fist. I don't think that's a good idea, really.

The Jillian Michael's thing is very good as well but I did start telling her to piss off so go to the gym instead and do 30 lengths (and then sit in the jacuzzi, and then sit in the bar grin).

I have sent you a MFP friend request, SPB smile

"however I just shied away from bread, pasta, rice and spuds."

What other carbs are there?! shock confused

"do 30 lengths"


"I got a bit excited when I started low carbing and ate blocks of cheese the size of my fist."
PMSL. I was the same when I half heartedly did SW. On the unlimited pasta days I used to have enough to fill a bucket
(not naturally a low carb type grin)

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Mon 07-Jan-13 12:49:06

Now. Listen to me young lady.

Yes you want to go on a diet and you may look at your thighs and think OH FOR THE LOVE OF GOD but you do NOT look like a slug. Just because you feel overweight don't start slagging the rest of yourself off. You are not ugly. You are lovely looking. Don't start ripping yourself to shreds.

Getorf is very wise
And if you don't like your weight you can lose weight.

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Mon 07-Jan-13 12:50:52

Other carbs - all the other vegs including the more interesting ones like sweeet potatoes and peas. That quinoa bollocks <never tried it>. Chickpeas. Lentils.

<Neil from the young ones emotiocn>

I can vouch for the Motivational Monday thread for support. I started in July and have lost 1.5st. Some are going much quicker than me though.

Everyone does there own thing but it all gets discussed. Successes and failures alike. The point is to keep going.

You can do this Baubles. It will happen if you want it to.

Honestly, I do look like a slug (thanks for being nice about my face though, you're luffly)

But I do look like a slug. I have no jawline and my face is collapsing into my neck. Like Jabba the Hut.

That is who I look like! Jabba. The Hut.

Ooh I love a sweet potato. PEAS ARE CARBS?????? But they're not even fun!

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Mon 07-Jan-13 12:52:12

No swimming is easy compared to that other bollocks they make you do like RUNNING or CYCLING. Even those cross trainer things are exhausting.

Swimming and lifting great big heavy weights like Geoff Capes - that's my exercise plan.

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Mon 07-Jan-13 12:53:44

Peas are like 100% sugar <science>

You are not supposed to eat them on low carby things as they are very starchy, but I used them in place of potato/pasta (as well as cabbage and cauli) - so could make a chilli or spag bol or something and just have some greens alongside.

I really, really like greens though. If you don't then this advice is probably fucking useless.

I can do swimming for hours and be fine. If I had a swimming pool in my house, I'd be waif-like. I love swimming.

AnyFucker Mon 07-Jan-13 12:54:02

I put on half a stone on the run up to and over xmas/NY

bastard mince pies

it's only a few pounds but my clothes look like shit

I will forever imagine you as Geoff Capes - that will be the mental image when I read your posts.

Bupcakes, I'm not just saying this, you look lovely (unless your MFP picture isn't you?).

Mince pies do nothing for me. I had the odd one and enjoyed it but no big deal. OTOH I had a Tesco finest yule log to myself in the run up to Christmas blush

I can sympathise. I weighed myself on New Year's Day, only to find that I'd gained a stone since last weigh-in. And previous weight was already on the cusp of obese. I've been using myfitnesspal since the 1st Jan and lost 4lb so far. I like scanning bar codes and the bit where it tells you how much you'll end up weighing if every day were like today is good too.

I love greens. I love spinach and cabbage and broccoli and all of that. I just don't think that peas can be allowed to be carbs, surely? That's sneaky that is.

(the full sized one)
(not the little mini rolls, you don't get the thick fudgey stuff on them)
(which by the way is revolting, don't ever try it)

scanning bar codes
say more! Did everyone else know about this but me?

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Mon 07-Jan-13 12:57:08

You do not look like Jabba the Hut. Don't be silly.

BUT I think being completely and utterly pissed off with yoruself is a good motivator - I was so bloody hacked off last year that it made me very determined.

I also found out that houmouss is full of calories. The bloody bastards. CHICKPEAS and it is something like 700 cals a pot (easily demolished in one go AFTER dinner as an 8 oclock snack. NIGHTLY).

Another bit of advice (which is probably against all dietetic advice but still) is to rule out snacking. It made me hungrier to snack. It just revved up my tastebuds. So - I just eat lunch and dinner every day (hate breakfast) and nowt else. It makes it easier (imo, anyway).

It is me, but me when I was thinner, not like J.T.H.

merlottits Mon 07-Jan-13 12:58:03

I'm also fat. So blimin' fat. I used to be slim. I used to run 10k. Then I had my 3rd baby and it all went tits up and now I'm a blimp.
Sadly I do not carry weight well. I look butch and hard. Strange men used to call me sexy, they now call me.....'Chief'. <<weeps>>

merlottits Mon 07-Jan-13 13:01:07

I can't cross my legs without using my hands as TOOLS to assist in the matter. I'm ashamed.

Climbingpenguin Mon 07-Jan-13 13:01:31

I just ate 10 biscuits <shakes head in shame>

not even for a reason, the DCs are ill and sleeping so felt like I deserved them.

"Strange men used to call me sexy, they now call me.....'Chief'"

Actually LOLing grin

I feel your pain. I don't carry my weight well either. Not like Nigella or Allsopp.

Merlottits I'm so sorry but that made me laugh.

My weakness is needing a mouth sweetener after a meal. It used to be chocolate, now it's coffee.

I'm ok at tracking calories and it's the thing that's helped the most. At the end of the day if you eat less calories and move more you will lose weight. The trick is finding the way that works for you v

merlottits Mon 07-Jan-13 13:02:53

Sorry to hijack the thread - I was lost in my own world of fat pain then!

erm no I can't believe that a few stone on will turn you into a monstrosity. You'll just look like that, only slightly larger smile
However agree anger and a determination not to be a slave to eating is a good motivator. I've always been a binge eater. It used to be how I was all the time (I ahve a fast metabolism - I do not know how I was only 16s6!). I fairly regularly have a day off, fine. But if I binge on my day off I wake up the next morning feeling bloated and full of shame - a bit like I do when I have too much to drink. It's good.

getOrf, I buy the reduced fat houmus, can't tell difference. Co-ops is nice. Someone on the Motivational Monday thread (was it you Hair?) recommended Ryvita, spread with houmous and then thinly sliced cucumeber and black pepper on top. I ahve the ryvita crispbreads and actually really enjoy it. It's now my default lunch at home.

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Mon 07-Jan-13 13:03:24

Allsopp doesn't carry it well either <bitch>

I am never buying stollen again. I swear it was never ending. 2 weeks of having stollen everyday. It can't be good.

And all the sausages ffs. what was I thinking? I bought 124 sausage for christmas. For 2!

and is about 150 cals for 3

Wasn't me SPB but it is tasty. [Grin] Think it might have been Kato.

nilbyname Mon 07-Jan-13 13:05:21

I have switched to porridge with half a banana in it for my brekker (rthare than toast and butter and peanut butter!!), keeps me going to lunch, which is half of what i had before. Literally half a sandwich and some fruit. Then dinner is what we usually have but on a small plate. No alcohol, no snacks, no juices. Just water. Walk EVERYWHERE and play footy with DS. Have lost 3lbs since NYday.

I have a fat flabby face. Tis horrid. I feel your pain Buppers.

Also I have a bad leg so I can only walk/hobble ATM. Soon to start zumba and shred in 2 weeks time though. I will be SLIM!!

HappyNewBleurgh Mon 07-Jan-13 13:07:42

Omg I daren't even weigh myself.

Maybe I could be stretched until I'm the right height for my weight.

I'd be about 10' tall if I did that Bleurgh. shock

MerryCouthyMows Mon 07-Jan-13 13:09:15

I've currently lost half a stone of the two stone I feel I need to lose.

All I have done is more housework!

(I blame MN for the state of my house!)

I already eat properly, so a change in my diet wasn't going to help, short of literally starving myself.

And I can't do high impact exercise because of my joint problems and epilepsy.

In my case, it's the meds that have made me pile on two stone, and if I manage to lose any more than the half a stone I've lost I'll be very surprised.

I'm down to 11 3/4 stone now, I was 12 1/4.

According to the GP, I should be 8 1/2 stone. But I think that's bollocks, because I take a size 6-8 trouser when I'm 9 1/2 stone. At 8 1/2, I'd be positively anorexic looking - and I'm not happy at 9 1/2 stone as I look like a bag of bones!

I am at my happiest when I'm 10 1/4 stone, and wearing a size 10.

Right now though, at 11 3/4 and wearing a size 14, I am at least a size larger than I would like to be.

I think the GP's target for my weight is so laughable because he doesn't count the fact that even when I am in a size 8 trouser, my Norks are a size 28F at the SMALLEST.

Right now, I'm in a 34G. So it stands to reason that I'm going to look like a coat stand with tits if I get down to 8 1/2 stone!

LOL I would need to be stretched to 60 foot tall to be the right weight for my height!

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 13:11:06

Bups, mon fleur, I know what you mean. When I put on weight (and I have - more of that in a sec), I get very bloaty of face. So my face grows sideways and my eyes look like raisins in unleavened bread dough. Which then makes my hair look thin and spindly and the overall result is v J.T.H.-esque.

I also get armpit fannys when my arms are by my side - I get pouches of fat shaped like a triangular snatch.

And back hamsters - you know when your bra is too tight and you look like you have two hamsters strapped to your back? Yup.

I'm a right bobbydazzler, I am hmm

What works for me is no carbs past 4pm. So I'm allowed "normal" healthy brekkie and "normal" healthy lunch but tea is no carbs. Forces you to eat veg (and poo more, which is good for de-bloating).

Make snacks a naice luxe coffee or a fruit tea (peppermint also great for de-bloating) rather than solids. I used to drink plain water (kep super cold in the fridge) and so I could have squash as a snack.

Let's de-Fat Biff ourselves together, shall we?

mckenzie Mon 07-Jan-13 13:12:27

don't forget to fit some weights into your new routine. If you do some basic weight training exercises then you'll keep burning off the fat/weight even after you've sat down.
Do you read a daily newspaper? Make it the Times for the next few weeks as Matt Roberts is running a daily article (today's is for the men so don't worry about getting it smile) It will show you some interesting exercises to do.

Also when you walk, remember to do some speedy bits too. Choose a lamppost or a particular car and walk to it as fast as you possibly can to get your breathing really laboured then walk at normal pace to recover and then pick another car/post etc and start again.

And have you set yourself a short term goal? I know you've said 3.5 stone by the end of may but that's a long way off. How about setting a target that you can reach in the next few weeks and a lovely treat for reaching it. A manicure maybe? or a new top that you've had your eye on. Something to spur you on to achieve your next target.

Good luck.

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 13:12:42


HappyNewBleurgh Mon 07-Jan-13 13:13:43

Yes we'd be unfeasably tall but a small price to pay and easier than a diet<clutches at cheese straws> grin

Hullygully Mon 07-Jan-13 13:14:38



Everything you've just said (and more) Pinot sad

Thigh chaffe. I got fucking thigh chaffe on holiday in August (should have been a klaxon of impending biffage, maybe?)

Armpit fannies, yes. Back hamsters, yes, sideways-growing face, yes. Bad times innit?

Yes please to de-biffing.

Oh and 4 Tits. That phenomenon where your bras not longer fit and your tits get divided into 4 by the tightness of your bra sad

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 13:19:27

I have 4 tits too <clings to Bups> Lordy, we are not sexy atm. But we will be! We will.

Oh Holy Fuck. i just logged back into MFP for the first time since June and the 31 pounds I had lost have been found again. Shitbuggerybollocksfuck.

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Mon 07-Jan-13 13:20:36

lol at sideways growing face grin

It's the stomach cellulite which pisses me off. No matter how slim I get, there it is. Bastards.

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 13:22:41

I reckon I am this close >< to getting cellulite on my face shock

RIGHT! Plan Of Action please, Chief <snurk> Bups

Lizzylou Mon 07-Jan-13 13:23:55

I weigh more than DH at the moment. He is only 1 inch taller than me, but was totally disgusted by his post-Chrimbo weight (as was I). I called him a fat bastard and told him I weighed a stone less shock

I need to lose 2 stone, my work dress today is so tight I am walking like Mrs Overall.

Another one doing MFP here.

fantashtic Mon 07-Jan-13 13:24:47

Am crying with laughter

Sideways growing face (yes)
124 sausages
coat stand with tits

Also, I have stomach cellulite and have since I was about 18, WTAF it's not FAIR

ToomuchWaternotWine Mon 07-Jan-13 13:25:57

Oh please come on over to the low carb threads, it really really works!!! <evangelical klaxon>

Lol-ing at "chief" too grin

HollySheet Mon 07-Jan-13 13:26:38

I weighed myself yesterday.

After spending half a year actually more like 3 months hovering between 9 stone 11 and 9 stone 12, I have finally, after much hard work stuffing my face with chocolate and cake reached 10 stone 2 and a half.

It is with grim determination that I have decided to use a combination of thoroughly starving oneself and stopping being a lazy bitch and walk the kids to school instead of driving.

Oh and swimming. As long as I can manage to sprint past the floor to ceiling mirrors with my eyes closed I'll be fiiiiine. grin

Do MFP with me, Pinot. You don't have to do the 1200 calories like me as I realise it is drastic (but drastic measures are needed for me) we can look at what each other are eating and there are other MNers on there that I spy on am friends with too. It's good for getting tips from their food diaries.

Recording everything I eat is the only thing that works for me because I am an out of control bloater.

I also weigh more than my DH, lizzielou! That is terrible for my height sad

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Mon 07-Jan-13 13:27:01

Oh lizzy "He is only 1 inch taller than me, but was totally disgusted by his post-Chrimbo weight (as was I). I called him a fat bastard and told him I weighed a stone less" that is so evil and wonderful. grin

I have had stomach cellulite since I was a STICK teenager as well. The stretchmarks from pregnancy have all but disappeared but the cellulite has increased. What's the point?

HollySheet Mon 07-Jan-13 13:27:41

Oh I should add that I'm a short arse as well as a lard arse...

Me too, Holly, me. 5ft 3" tall and as wide as a skip.

I must look like a fucking tank rolling down the street.

TigerFeet Mon 07-Jan-13 13:29:36

I know exactly how much I weigh, and usually do, but thought I was carrying it well - ha - then dh took a pic of me and the dc's on Saturday and someone had swapped me for this pale blubbery no-necked no-eyed blob.

I also spent all day Saturday walking round London and ended up with <whispers> chafing </whispers> between my thighs even though I was wearing jeans. And big red welts around my waist because my jeans were too tight.

Yesterday I decided it's time to remove my head from the sand and Do Something About It, so I started this morning. I'm doing a sort of low carb lite, starting with a week's detox of no wheat, no dairy and no alcohol.

There is still Christmas shite in the house. It is a battle of wills. I will not be beaten by a mini fucking mince fucking pie ffs.

I probably have about 5/6 stone to lose in total but will start with half a stone by the end of January.

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 13:30:04

OK, I'm going to set up an account on MFP. Can you PM me/let me know your name so we can hook up?

It will shame me into dieting blush

I am still snurking to myself at "Chief" but only because I get all bucth when I'm overweight too. I get broad of back.

Fucking hell I have to diet. Typing this is really gross, actually.

Lizzylou Mon 07-Jan-13 13:30:07

Oh I am really really tall (and really really wide), so I look a bit like a rugby player in drag at the moment.

BUT I have lost 3lbs since Wednesday, so all is going well. I have a "big" birthday in April and will be svelte and gorgeous by then, oh yes.

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Mon 07-Jan-13 13:30:53

my MFP is funny to read - It starts off at a high weight, then I religiously input everything in for a few months, then 'fuck it', then religious input again.

Very, very pissed off to see a 7lb increase though. Never mind. I am aiming to get to 9 stone 7 so I have a stone to lose, 2lbs a week so 2 months.

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 13:31:12

*butch not bucth I EVEN HAVE FAT FINGERS

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Mon 07-Jan-13 13:32:02

Today's entry: 4 highland shortbread fingers (360 cals) Fuck them.

honeymulholland is my username on MFP Pinot, and anyone else who wants to join in smile

Whatnameforme Mon 07-Jan-13 13:33:38

Have you tried couch to 5k, lots of good reviews? sounds straight forward and you don't need any special equipment? You can lose weight, an working in that, but what can you do about the large bags under my eyes and small person constantly attached?

Lizzylou Mon 07-Jan-13 13:34:32

On MFP, do people who you team up with know your weight???

(Taking that stone off again if so!)

Whatnameforme Mon 07-Jan-13 13:35:54

Wow threebee, that's good going! 4lb! Well done!

DoubleMum Mon 07-Jan-13 13:36:19

I too need to lose * ahem * a lot of weight. I can identify with the hamsters and the sideways face and the 27 chins and all the rest of it unfortunately. And I am only 5'2. AND I weigh more than DH who is 6'.
I need to do something. But at the mo, DH is de-toxing and can't manage diet food as well as no alcohol, so I might have to be sneaky about it. At least I am drinking no alcohol, but I didn't drink much anyway.

Is Couch to 5K running? No way can I run. I can't even waddle fast. I will have a look though just to see...

People don't know your weight Lizzy, but they will see how much you have lost should you choose to enter it!

fantashtic Mon 07-Jan-13 13:36:59

i've been doing MFP religiously since last Wednesday when in a post NY binge (did anyone else eat 3/4 of a crispy duck and pancakes? No? just me then) I had to extend my waistband with a hair bobble sad

How do you make your food diary public (Bupcakes can you see mine?)
Might shame me into stop eating chocolate and haribo

I have just rejoined MFP after taking nearly 5 months off (the constant logging was starting to grate)
I shat myself when I stepped on the scales yesterday morning - holy moses I had put a lot back on!!

lizzielou, you can befriend people on MFP but can keep your diary and progress / weight private (I believe)
I have it all on display (to friends only) as it will shame me into keeping going.

The motivation from others is what makes it work (for me anyway...)

I am petd on MFP, please add me if you wish smile

RalphGnu Mon 07-Jan-13 13:39:15

Argh, trying to read the thread properly but the boy is oining me for CbloodyBeebies. Will be back later to peruse at leisure.

WaspFactory Mon 07-Jan-13 13:39:50

Same here, I knew before Christmas I needed to lose AT LEAST 3.5 stone - off to join Slimming World tonight so absolutely dreading my first weigh-in blush

Whatnameforme Mon 07-Jan-13 13:39:50

It's fairly gentle. I haven't run since I missed my bus in 1992! And even to me it looks doable. As an example on the first day you exercise for 30 minutes, out of those I think you only run for 5! Slow build up.

Whatnameforme Mon 07-Jan-13 13:40:56

Oh fantastic, hair bobble! You should be proud of yourself for being so ingenious.

WaspFactory Mon 07-Jan-13 13:42:22

Ooh, just looked at the NHS C25K website, I think I might try that seeing as it's free.

SPB I can't see yours. To change it, you have to go to the My Home tab, then settings, then down to Diary settings.

There's no rule to say you have to share though, if you'd rather stay private!

LOL at bus in 1992!

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 13:45:50

Just weighed myself sad Blimes.

<cold sweat>

FreudiansSlipper Mon 07-Jan-13 13:47:08

I need to get rid of 2 stone of flab

I started doing the shred after 10 I could feel a difference then I stopped hmm

starting again ....

ahh been searching for that thank you - should be done.
No I want it public. Might make me think twice before logging "cooking chocolate-255g"

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 13:48:31

I did The Shred last year and it bust my left knee. Still hurts me now! Bloody DVD.

HollySheet Mon 07-Jan-13 13:48:47


I can't run. I have what I like to call my bionic spine. (just lots and lots of metal pins and screws in reality) and it feels weird when I try to run.

Howmuch does My Fitness Plan cost? Might have a go with that.

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 13:50:51

MFP is free

NaiceDude Mon 07-Jan-13 13:51:55

Hang on

124 sausages?

For serious?

Chubfuddler Mon 07-Jan-13 13:56:09

3 of us in the office have just ordered the shred on amazon. Slimming world starts again Wednesday. I lost 2.5 stone in 2012 and kept it off, but I want to get another 2 stone off by the summer.

NaiceDude Mon 07-Jan-13 14:00:00

Also Buppy please don't worry about your holiday with your "thin friend", you should by all means lose the weight but I'm sure your friend isn't comparing so you shouldn't either sad

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Mon 07-Jan-13 14:01:36


I bought 2 packs of 24 cocktail sausages from Sainsburys.

Then thought I may run out so got another couple from the tesco at the top of the road.

I then made the mistake of going to the Whole Foods market place and bought another pack of cocktail sausages of a different flavour and in addition some big sausages from the butcher's counter.

They have all been eaten, btw. grin 48 of them got converted into the biggest dish of stuffing in the western world. Half of it eaten by me, stood up in the kitchen, with a glass of mulled wine, reading Closer <classy>

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Mon 07-Jan-13 14:02:41

It is a miracle that I only put on half a stone, tbh.

bigkidsdidit Mon 07-Jan-13 14:04:01

Chief! hahahahaha.

I got 'surprise' pregnant when at my fattest last year and now I am 18 weeks and I thought I'd put my pants on back to front this morning and I hadn't. AND they were the ones I bought to wear post-birth last time, big enough to hold the pads in blush

and I can't even diet till June <weeps>

can I sensibly low-carb while pg? anyone know?

DeafLeopard Mon 07-Jan-13 14:06:17

I'm dragging my lardy arse onto this thread. I'm teetering on the brink of obese on those nasty BMI charts.

I keep looking in the cupboards at all the xmas stuff and want to eat it all. I really need to bin it.

IrnBruTheNoo Mon 07-Jan-13 14:10:22

Just weighed myself this morning too. I'm now 162lbs shock - gained 8lbs in two months...Target is 154lbs (11st). Starting from today! So far so good....

To make myself feel better though, I realise this time last year I was 190lbs, so really 8lbs is not a lot to lose.

good luck to everyone else aiming to beat the flab grin

OwlLady Mon 07-Jan-13 14:16:50

ahh no-one needs to cry sad

The worst thing imo is weighing yourself and getting started. I started god, two years ago now and I weighed more than I have ever done and it seemed such a long road in order to get slimmer/fitter/healthier but I did it in small steps (and I attended weightwatchers, cooked normal smaller meals - no ready meals) I managed to lose 51lb in a year and I kept it all off for about 8 months but just lately I have been awful blush and put about a stone on but I suppose it still means I have lost almost 40lb since january 2011....

I am going back to weightwatchers tomorrow <sigh> but it's just makiing that decision and sticking to it. Starting small with exercise, these get fit in two weeks things in all the papers are for people who are already pretty trim mo. If you are a heifer like I was, it's going two walks a week and then increasing on that and going for longer until you can walk everyday at a proper pace and distance. walking really works, i recommend it.

How long did you walk for initially and how far, OwlLady?

DyeInTheEar Mon 07-Jan-13 14:35:35

Back Hamsters grin

got a couple of those under my bra strap.

shine0ncrazydiamond Mon 07-Jan-13 14:48:23

Christ woman - anyone would think you were 25 stone! You're lucky in that you're beautiful and you need to stop running yourself down!

Calorie counting is the way to go and it's what I do to maintain. I was 14 stone this time last year and a size 16/18. I'm only 5 foot 3 and a half. I'm now 9 stone and size 8 and have maintained this weight ( give or take a few lbs ) by CC and eating carbs moderately - and no white carbs at all. I also don't snack.

Sometimes though I don't want to eat yet another breakfast of natural yogurt, berries and flaxseeds sad

Just write it all down to make yourself accountable, eat three times a day , drink mint tea and et voila ! You'll be job done by the summer

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 14:56:26


Dat true? ^ Is it that easy? What about booze? What about when you've had a bad day and wanna stuff your face with stuff covered in cheese?

SantasENormaSnob Mon 07-Jan-13 15:01:12

You are beautiful bups.

I am feeling the same as the rest of you. 27 weeks pregnant but I can feel the extra fat not just bump sad I am well over a stone heavier than the start (and i wasnt slim then tbf) and I always pile it on at the end too.

I do keep crying about it too blush obviously not distressed enough to leave the cake the fuck alone.

OwlLady Mon 07-Jan-13 15:02:20

I walked for an hour a day, maybe about a mile or two but it's not really the distance that is important, it's the pace and time taken. I bought myself some trainers to walk in and just started that way. I used to listen to womens hour grin You do ache afterwards though if you have been very inactive so i sued to use some nurfen rub on my knee joints if they ached too much (I have hypermobile joints which doesn't help really) You will get there, you just need to stay focussed

ErikNorseman Mon 07-Jan-13 15:07:28

I'm doing intermittent fasting. 500 cals 3 days a week, loads normal food the rest of the time. It's totes easy.

spamm Mon 07-Jan-13 15:25:19

I have sent friend messages to a couple of you on MFP - I would love to join in for support. I was diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes in May - I hate admitting that, I feel so ashamed - and I have lost 24 lbs since then, but I still have lots to lose.

My biggest change has been working with a personal trainer at the gym - that really does work in reshaping my body, and making me feel a lot better about myself, but is not enough to lose weight - I need to diet as well, and I am finding that really hard right now.

shine0ncrazydiamond Mon 07-Jan-13 15:49:04

Hola Pinot !

I'm lucky in that I don't really drink so giving up alcohol had never been a problem for me. And no it's not easy but I am quite ' goal driven ' and wanted to be not fat at 40 which I just about achieved !

Maintenance is harder than losing the weight

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 16:03:25

YY the about-to-be-40 thing is ringing bells. DSis 40 next month, next year its DH and then it's me. I don't want to be a middle-aged fatso.


I'm ChieftoKitten on MFP is anyone wants to add me.

Chief = Fat Biffer
Kitten = sex kitten

One can try, anyway.

Thank you for the kaind words, lovely people. I certainly don't feel attractive at all. I feel like a big shapeless mass with a head stuck on top.

Shiney, you have done brilliantly and I am well jel'. envy

Spamm, I have added you on MFP smile

"I do keep crying about it too obviously not distressed enough to leave the cake the fuck alone." Ha ha ha ha ha ha! grin You are PREGGOLZ give yourself a break!

Oh Pinot your MFP username, I laughed!

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 16:19:40

grin grin

MrsCampbellBlack Mon 07-Jan-13 16:21:27

I am fat as butter at the moment.

Stupid boredom eating over christmas means I have gained weight. I need to lose a stone near enough to be at goal.

And because I am just 5ft and small boned the extra really shows. Honestly I went shopping yesterday and tried on a denim shirt - I looked like I was auditioning for a role in prisoner cell block h.

So am low carbing and hoping to be at goal by end of feb.

I totally get the feeling angry at yourself though.

I am so glad I am not alone with the armpit-snatches, I spotted them in the mirror and after nearly vomiting wondered wtf was going on.
I am like a fucking house brick with a potato for a head at the moment - beautiful I know.
Is 7lbs off by the end of Jan realistic? Though if I could just dump three stones I would be ecstatic.

I also hate seeing anybody at the moment. I just know they're looking at me and thinking "god Alex has packed it on". Especially my bone thin mother.

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 16:27:49

I think so, Alex. I've downloaded MFP onto my phone so I can updateall I'm gobbling. 7lb in, what, 3 weeks? Gotta be do-able of you're committed enough.

7lbs off by end of January is totally realistic. You'll probably lose a good chunk on your first week of serious dieting/calorie reduction.

Two years ago, when I was 76kg I managed to lose 10.5kg reaching a wonderful - and foolishly, so foolishly bought a new slimline wardrobe (nothing fits any more sad ).

Today I weigh 74.9kg. A mere 1.1kg off my all time high. I weigh more than my (older than me) DB, and DF, and I believe, my DM too, who all happily told me how much they weigh over Christmas dinner. Thank fuck DH is also a fat bastard from over indulging at Christmas. I don't actually understand how I put so much weight on as I only got hold of two mince pies (we live overseas) and no sausage rolls whatsoever. It's possible the wine had a lot of calories, I suppose.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Last time I had to do Dukan and I didn't poo for 8 days. I can't do that again or I'll explode.

What's this MFP malarkey - does it involve diet or exercise? Is wine allowed?

<wails repeatedly at the thought of giving up wine and thick white toast with lashings of butter >

SantasENormaSnob Mon 07-Jan-13 16:30:08

I'm 5'7 so obviously can carry extra weight well.

<totes deluded>

My main problem is sweet stuff atm. I have substituted wine consumption for cake.

envy of shiny.

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 16:33:30

I'm really not into sweet stuff. Salty crisps or a greasy chip buttie, however, and I'll snort like a piggy searching for truffles.

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 16:33:43


SantasENormaSnob Mon 07-Jan-13 16:37:16

I don't discriminate against the savoury fattening stuff tbf.

I eat the fucking lot sad

We must be so similar, Pinot. I am a savoury scoffer too. A day out at Cadbury World, no problem. Walk past a Greggs and my hunger pangs ramp up to DEFCON1. It's awful.

And wine! I love the wine! <looks guiltily at 6 Prosecco bottles in recycling bin, quaffed by moi over the last week>

Good news though! Champagne and prosecco = 78 calories a glass!

DeafLeopard Mon 07-Jan-13 16:41:33

I've added a few of you now regretting the cheese and biscuits for lunch and after school chomp

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 16:42:28

OMG Greggs. And now you can have a Sausage'n'Bean Slice at 10.30PM on a Sunday night because they sell the FUCKERS in Iceland

And I did. And it wasn't just one Jesus Wept. CHIEF.

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 16:43:04

Ooh is that true about le fizz?

Varya Mon 07-Jan-13 16:43:05

Its likely that your scales are wrong!

cardibach Mon 07-Jan-13 16:44:56

I lost 2 and a half stone last year and got much, much fitter bu seing a personal trainer and aiming to make all meals third each of protein, carb and veg (I know veg is carb, but you know what I mean). I now need to get on with losing the other 3 stone or so to get to a healthy weight. I have done COuch to 5K, and I couldn;t even run when I was a teenager. I haven;t got up to 5K yet, but I can run for 25 minutes now. I don;t hate it any more, and sometimes, I feel really proud of my body and how capable it is now. (My impetus to diet came on a holiday I went on when I couldn't do some quite simple stuff, like getting into a little boat off a bigger one without difficulty).

They're not wrong, Varya! Sadly.

If you are on MFP there is a very motivating before and after pics thread. Honestly, what some of them have achieved is the shit. It's totally made me think "Right, you fat cunt..." Although I must admit that I judged the state of some of the houses <twat>

CalamityJones Mon 07-Jan-13 16:46:09

Prosecco is only 78 calories a glass? Ta ta, dry January!

Lizzylou Mon 07-Jan-13 16:46:33

Vodka lime and soda is what the suppermoggles drink.
But it tastes wierdy and not comforting like wine.

I go to the gym/do Just dance to earn calories for booze.
Does that sound like I have a problem? Sometimes I do the Just Dance after a few glasses which makes for a fun evening.

Oh I am LizzylouM on MFP.

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 16:46:35

<goes for a nosey at the pics>

OwlLady Mon 07-Jan-13 16:48:41

greggs sausage rolls are lovely from iceland but since i left working for them i have vowed never to disgrace their doorway again

bingo grin

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 16:50:44

ooOoo <sniffs baked goods related goss> Why? Do they spit on the Slices? Drop boogers on the doughnuts? Pray tell...

Chubfuddler Mon 07-Jan-13 16:57:53

Cava? How many cals in cava?

OwlLady Mon 07-Jan-13 17:01:48

lol pinot, no I just hated my last experience working there. Food safety standards were fine grin

chub, cava has a very high sugar content because sparkling wine requires more sugar for oxidisation (or something) but tbh cava is the only thing i drink

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 17:07:48


I got a tad excited there. Gossip and Baked Goods are my 2 fave things. Combine them and <POW> I went giddy.

As you were grin

OwlLady Mon 07-Jan-13 17:12:05


GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Mon 07-Jan-13 17:14:23

Vodka lime and soda is a load of old rubbish.

That is when I discovered martinis, however. Fuxking marvellous, and you get a vodka soaked olive to chew on.

But then you get bored, and as you are pissed you order the really sugary del boy cocktails. And then you are hungry so you eat again. And then order chips from the 24 hour chip takeaway which DELIVERS (fuck you,

^ story of my life

TheLightPassenger Mon 07-Jan-13 17:15:20

I look like a PG weeble. And I'm not even pregnant angry. 3 sodding stone needs to go.

I am deluded. I am tall and very quickly become a size 16 when I start gaining weight. It's progress for me to actually admit that. I think I have reverse body dysmorphia. I actually THINK I AM THIN even when my jeans pockets are straining open and my jumpers (clearly they shrank in the wash) ride up over my tummy (which looks like an accordion going in and out due to the fat and c-section scar). I haven't worn jeans this tight since I was 14 years old. Decades ago.

It's quite difficult to sit down when they're this tight, isn't it? please God don't let me be the only one who's so deluded about her real size

MrsPnut Mon 07-Jan-13 17:26:32

I am a fat biffer, and even though I have lost 2.5 stone, I still have a very long way to go.

In 1998, I lost 5 stone and put it all back on and more in the following few years.

I am mrs_pnut on MFP and I am determined to lose more weight this year. I've ordered some clothes that I will have to lose a stone to fit in properly so I am determined to do that before my birthday at the beginning of march.

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 17:31:10

<links arms with ChinUp>

<waddles in>

I should rename myself a fat finger of fudge at the moment as I currently need to lose at least 2 stone!! However, the fact that I've got about half a shops worth of Hotel Chocolat chocolates in the house means I'm not actually quite there on the being serious about giving up yet!!
But I want to!! I am also another one angry at myself for letting my lard overtake my life....

However, I am going to try to embrace the quote "it's easier to wake up early and work out than it is to look in the mirror each day and not like what you see"

And will try to limit each day how many of the gorgeous HC feckers I eat <tries to cross fat fingers>

OhIWishThereWasABook Mon 07-Jan-13 17:34:56

Am laughing so much (trying to be quiet ]that my children think I'm crying grin
Actual tears in eyes -you are all very funny indeed.
Obviously have to join you guys too, have about 3/4 to lose. Agreed with earlier poster in doctors 'ideal weight' charts. I didn't weight THAT when I was young, fit and size 8/10.
Anyway, isn't too thin ageing?

theowlworrier Mon 07-Jan-13 17:41:05

Urgh. I am hideous at the moment. DD is now 10 months old and I keep losing and putting on the same 10 pounds. Of the 5 stone I need to lose. <weeps>
I am on MFP, user name aegerine if anyone wants to friend me...!
Going to the gym tonight, and am 3 days in to the 30 day shred!

SantasENormaSnob Mon 07-Jan-13 17:43:34

I think being too thin is ageing.

With my chubby chops I should look about 4.

sassytheFIRST Mon 07-Jan-13 17:50:14

I need your help ladies. I vowed not to be fat and forty - forty came and went last month. And I'm still fattish. Bastard flabbery. And bastard huge tits.

Loving the sideways growing face. I have waistband slugs - one sitting just above each hip. I want to pour salt on the buggers but would prob just try and eat that too.

perplexedpirate Mon 07-Jan-13 17:53:04

DS has just told me my tummy is big enough to have another baby. sad
Need to get on this I think.
Going to make a healthy tea and set my alarm for 6am to start couch to 5k again.
6 farking stone to lose!! sadsadsad

DeafLeopard Mon 07-Jan-13 18:01:24

Oooh we get to judge people's houses too? Excellent. Shame even my judgy pants are too tight

aJumpedUpPantryBoy Mon 07-Jan-13 18:10:01

I'm fat and to add insult to injury my face appears to have reverted that to that of an acned teenager. I think it may have something to do with the junk I have eaten this holiday.

I lost 2 stone using MFP two years ago but a stone has crept back on. I have back-boobs - when I remember how thrilled I was when I lost weight and bought myself lovely underwear I feel really annoyed that I let the weight creep back on.

ShowOfHands Mon 07-Jan-13 18:15:01

Good luck to you all.

You are all being ridiculously hard on yourselves. Your bodies are just the things which house who you are. You can change them. Look, you've already started. You could be twats by nature. Then you'd be really fucked.

<end motivational speech

ShowOfHands Mon 07-Jan-13 18:16:53

Oh silly 'puter posting before I gave it permission.

I had a baby 16 months ago and weighed 12 stones afterwards.

Today I weigh 8st 4lbs, am a comfortable size 8. I didn't diet at all. Probably still a twat though. That I can't change. If I can do it, anybody can do it.

NoelHeadbands Mon 07-Jan-13 18:22:55



lolaflores Mon 07-Jan-13 18:23:12

I have inadvertently lost weight thanks to.....lots of tramadol, oxycontin. Mixing it with drink is not recommended. Hence I have not had a sip for months. narcotics reduce one's appetite. Hurray for me, dull, sober xmas. Though rather than buckets of coke, I like lime cordial and tonic, feels more grown up, but much better with a belt of vods in it.
Unable to exercise due to back and would love to do the Couch to 5K. Maybe next year sisters.
However, simply cutting portion size at one's meals is a great start. Seriously, makes an immediate difference.

Flisspaps Mon 07-Jan-13 18:24:11

I'm on there. I had lost about 15lbs but 12 have gone back on hmm

Aiming for 10st 9lbs - a comfortable size 12 for me - by April, if I can.

Am on MFP - unsurprisingly, as Flisspaps.

holidaysarenice Mon 07-Jan-13 18:29:31

Feel free to come join the, 'it was more than an inch he pinched thread' and keep the motivation up that way!!

sassytheFIRST Mon 07-Jan-13 18:29:40

Can friendly yet shouty stern types add me on mfp please? Sassie118.

spanky2 Mon 07-Jan-13 18:31:35

Oh chinup I am just the same! I couldn't understand why my friend is a size 14 and I'mnot. Until I saw a photo of us together ! Twice the size round the middle .grin

Jajas Mon 07-Jan-13 18:34:40

I feel like a complete imposter being on this thread as I'm weedy and could do with chubbing up a bit but that is a whole other issue.

Just have to say that it is the most humorous thread I've read in months, you are all so funny so don't be too hard on yourselves!

I keep muttering 'chief' to myself and collapsing into fresh paroxysms of laughter grin!

Waswondering Mon 07-Jan-13 18:44:12

(Whispers ... Please, what is MFP?)

Chubfuddler Mon 07-Jan-13 18:45:36

Chinup that's me. I currently actually look like what I thought I looked like at fifteen stone eleven. I'm 2.5 stone lighter mow. When I looked in the mirror I saw a slightly gone to seed size 14/16 but essentially looking ok. Photographic evidence showed me for the fatso I was.

MaureenShit Mon 07-Jan-13 18:48:41

MFP drives me nuts

heres my way to lose

NO BOOZE in the week

breafkast - porridge

apple at brreak

salad ( no dressing) and protein at lunch nO CARBS

tea grilled meat/poached fish/veg curry type thing with veg for tea

ITS EASY once every time you are tempted you think " NO THIS SHIT DOESNT MAKE ME HAPPY WHEN I STAND ON THE SCALES"

MaureenShit Mon 07-Jan-13 18:49:42

AND think yo yourself - " is this WORTH wasting good cals on"

then look again at your mr kipling shite

really - you can getin the groove if oyu visualise yourself doing up a nice tight skirt and NOT pulling your top over your fat bits

PLus if you like exercise but hate dancing etc and want results do body pump

LulaPalooza Mon 07-Jan-13 18:51:08

Oh, this thread has made me laugh and sort of made me feel a bit better. A bit.

In the last 20 years I have lost and gained and lost and gained enough weight to make at least 2 more of me. Pity they aren't here to give me a good slap.

Right now I am a fat huffamoose and hating myself because back in September I swore I would lose weight before my holiday... which is now in 10 days.

Oh, I lost some weight (about half a stone) AND THEN STUFFED MY FAT FACE AND PUT IT ALL BACK ON AGAIN AND SOME MORE. angry

So now I am in a frenzy of buying nice sparkly flipflops so that perhaps my in-laws won't notice how fucking fat I am when we're on the beach.

They'll only notice the flipflops, right? And not the rolls of flab/ back hamsters/ chafed thighs?


MaureenShit Mon 07-Jan-13 18:51:46

why did oyu "stuff your fat face"?

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 18:51:51

MFP = My Fitness Pal

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 18:53:31

Oi Mo, v good advice (tahnk you) but play nicely <flutter eyelashes> Overeating is psychology not laziness, mmm-kay?

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 18:53:57

typo not on purpose grin

LulaPalooza Mon 07-Jan-13 18:54:56

Because I basically like all the kind of food that is bad for me and have no self control, Maureen. And don't exercise.

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 18:56:18


Can i join you?

I got on the scales and i'm 14st 8! About three weeks before Xmas i just stuffed my face and now I've put a stone and i'm so mad at myself sad

Can someone explain my fitness pal please?

Chubfuddler Mon 07-Jan-13 19:04:30

I have to say the illustrations on the British heart foundation bmi chart are perhaps unintentionally hilarious

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 19:05:38

I only joined today, willow, it logs all your food/calories so you can tell if you're on target to lose whatever you want to lose. Free, dead simple. Enter some details (weight now, target weight, height etc and how much you eat and exercise) and it logs it all. Theory for me is it'll make me realise how much I'm I'll stop it.

Spinaroo Mon 07-Jan-13 19:05:57

I'm in. The thread title drew me in as I wondered if I had perhaps written it in a daze after stepping off the scales at the weekend. I have never knowingly been this weight before. And like chinupchestout, I regularly convince myself I am thin. Be back later, got to go out.

aJumpedUpPantryBoy Mon 07-Jan-13 19:19:33

Pinot - it makes me much more aware of how much I eat. When I'm not using MFP I can eat a shockigly high number of calories without trying.
It also makes me plan ahead, I'm quite sad in that I like spreadsheet type things and to see numbers and facts so I think it satisfies the inner geek in me

Sadly, it doesn't satisfy the inner, greedy me grin

RandallPinkFloyd Mon 07-Jan-13 19:19:49

Oh God, I'm way too scared to weigh myself. sad

The Boxing Day photos are enough. My bil is one of those twats that takes sneaky pics when you're not looking.

Fuck. Me. Sideways.

I have no chin, no discernible jaw bone at all. Just a big wibbly mass that goes from my bottom lip to my chest.

There is no air between the tops of my thighs at all, not even a sliver. They are one flabby mass. Why did no one tell me my skinny jeans look a fucking fright?

Since being single I've just not bothered about what I eat at all. Not eaten lads but just eaten shit. And no proper mealtimes just snacking if I feel like it.

I have lunch lady arms. I've never had big arms. The only remotely normal sized bit of me is my wrists.

The best part of it is I have no tits or arse to balance things out. I'm basically just one shapeless mass from head to toe.

I used to have hips, hips god damn it.

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 19:23:56

Randall - listen. Today is the last day you'll be this heavy. Tomorrow you'll weigh a bit less, and the day after that...and the day after that. This is your low point, which means the only way is up smile Join MFP and friend me and we'll do it together - theres a few of us on it just from this thread alone.

Imagine how good we'll feel in a months time, on 7 Feb when we're half a stone lighter and we can see cheekbones again!

RandallPinkFloyd Mon 07-Jan-13 19:27:38

I can confirm I have definitely not eaten lads nor have I eaten loads!

Pinot you're so positive! I bought the shred months ago. It scares me. I haven't been brave enough to unwrap it yet blush

aJumpedUpPantryBoy Mon 07-Jan-13 19:29:30

Randall you just made me snort loudly

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 19:30:54

Shred fucked my knee (genuinely - months later still in pain). Be careful <glares at Jillian bastard Michaels>

I do feel positive actually - but that's cos of Buppers being so honest and making me see I'm a biffer - so many women being honest on this thread. Tis good. Onwards, chiefs! Onwards!

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 19:31:22

"Chief" makes me snurk every time grin

laurenamium Mon 07-Jan-13 19:32:58

Hello! I hope you don't mind but I have added a few people on here on MFP! My name is Laurenamium on there too! I could do with lots of people to keep me motivated!

shine0ncrazydiamond Mon 07-Jan-13 19:33:17

grin you lot make me laugh.

I love all the ' I'm not giving up wine / cakes / chocolate ' wails

The sad fact is that if you want to lose weight then you HAVE to give it up. Or show restraint and just eat or drink a small amount once a fortnight. Which didn't work for me. I viewed it as ... I spent a fair few years indulging my fat face so it stood to reason that I'd have to go through a period of deprivation to reverse what I'd done to myself.

I've also thrown out every piece of clothing I previously owned and invested £££ in a size 8 / 10 wardrobe so I just literally cannot afford to put the weight back on.

Here's a motivational quite for you all ...

'Being overweight is hard. Losing weight is hard. Choose your hard. '

Oh and man up and stop eating! Food is not a comfort if you're not comfortable.

( I should write a book. No one would buy it )

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 19:34:34

Oh oh. I love your quote <quote whore>

juneybean Mon 07-Jan-13 19:43:09

For those of you that havve lost a few stones what happened to you <lowers voice> stretched skin?

This is something I'm so paranoid about

Lizzylou Mon 07-Jan-13 19:43:25

Who'd have thought it? Shiney the Personal Trainer and kick ass diet queen of MN grin
Nah, you've done fabulously Shine so I shall soak up your wisdom.

I like MFP because you can have treats and a bit of what you fancy (in moderation) as long as you stay within limits, if you know you are going out to partake in a few G&T's/Pints of scrumpy/Magnum of champagne you just make sure you earn the calories by exercising/cutting back.
You do have to show restraint but NOT cut everything out, if I do that then I fail. Every single yo yo dieting time.

juneybean Mon 07-Jan-13 19:44:13


I'm not even on my phone :S

And if you have a bad day get right back to it the next day. You want to lose the weight eventually don't you? So start from where you are rather than thinking stuff it and stuffing your face until you finally get your motivation back and are pounds heavier so have more to lose

That's my plan anyway...

Lizzylou Mon 07-Jan-13 19:46:15

AND you very much have to feel like you are worth the effort.
The effort to meal plan/make time for exercise, look after yourself.

When I feel low in myself I don't feel like I deserve to make time for fitness etc.

With that in mind I have come home from the gym and now have a quorn bolognaise cooking for tomorrow nights dinner. Otherwise I will make cheese on toast or something crap and easy.

June, mine does a lovely wobbly jelly routine round my middle. I don't care, better than it was when it was perfectly rounded, nothing that can't be controlled by spanx and the only people who see me naked love me anyway. Well apart from any peeping toms and quite frankly they deserve what they get.

Very good point pizza. You also have to have time . In my last, nasty job, I had little time or brain left over for this stuff. Now I have a nicer job and losing weight is probably my main hobby after mn

Lizzy, not pizza. Ironic auto correct!

I'm adding some of you. I need people to look at my food diary on MFP and tell me what a great job I'm doing, otherwise I'll stop. I'm like a toddler. A big, chunky toddler.

Lizzylou Mon 07-Jan-13 19:53:42

grin at Pizza!!
That has been my issue, SPB, time. I work FT now, I am quite time poor, though do have certain days when DH picks up DC/they have clubs etc so I just have to take advantage of that. And plan ahead. Not buy crap food.

I also have to realise that quick fixes do not work and I need to be a bit more patient.

please God don't let me be the only one who's so deluded about her real size"


I look at pictures of, ahem, larger women and think "aww I'm not THAT big" and actually, I am, or ain't far off.

"'Being overweight is hard. Losing weight is hard. Choose your hard. ' "

my God that is fucking brilliant, I am writing it out and sticking it on the biscuit tin fridge.

Actually LOLing at "big chunky toddler" grin

EugenesAxe Mon 07-Jan-13 19:56:08

I'm trying out the recently publicised Fast Diet (today is my first fast day) - you do two days fasting interspersed in five days of normal eating and you are limited to 400-500 calories on fast days.

I'm pretty hungry now... I don't remember losing much/anything when I joined a mate for Ramadan, but then my evening meals are always the biggies... I go totally the wrong way.

DSis is a PE teacher and reminded me weight loss is 70:30 calories: exercise, and that 8 minute abs on YouTube will see me right while allowing me to have a life around my children.

Good luck everyone!

nilbyname Mon 07-Jan-13 20:00:07

Cab you tell me you mfp names please? I will friend you all there but as it is linked to my face ache account I don't want to out my real self on mn

juneybean Mon 07-Jan-13 20:02:18

Mine is jefnerf smile

I am honeymulholland, nilby smile I have accepted everyone else that added me too!

And check this out, I've been pissing like the clappers today. That's because I've reduced my calorie intake loads. My body is shifting excess water already! POW POW POW

Same as my username. Add me.
I will bitch and moan all over your newsfeed.

juneybean Mon 07-Jan-13 20:06:56

Losing water weight always spurs you on because you lose loads in the first week grin

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 20:08:48

I am so happy for your urination, darling bups <said with love>

My MFP = ChieftoKitten

I've emailed that quote to DH blush

Lizzylou Mon 07-Jan-13 20:09:26

I am LizzylouM

Why is your food dairy not public, Pinot, hmmmmm? Gerrit open! Let aunty Buppers in!

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 20:12:56


I had a bad day, mm-kay? I didn't start til after lunch and I was already 400 bastard calories over the DAILY allowance.


Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 20:13:22

I'll open it tomoz when I'm all saintly

I did sound creepy then. I am sorry sad

creepy lesbo friend of your mum's

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 20:18:48

heh grin

Your dinner sounded naice, btw. (I am a food stalker now)

RandallPinkFloyd Mon 07-Jan-13 20:20:18

Well I've made an account thingy.

No idea how it works but I'll revise tonight.

(Not starting til tomorrow, had deep fried cheese for lunch blush

I'm RandallFloyd. Will try and find out how to add people later.

I need the shame to motivate me otherwise I'll sit eating crips giving myself a "learn to love yourself as you are" motivational speech!

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 20:20:51
Lizzylou Mon 07-Jan-13 20:23:36

Randall, shame is what is motivating me, that and not being a fat ole biffing 40 yr old.

How do you update/add tickers? I know it is very UN MN but I quite like a graph/visual aid grin

RandallPinkFloyd Mon 07-Jan-13 20:23:59

Ooh, I have mail! I shall return....

gobbymare Mon 07-Jan-13 20:24:23

Ok so i have read this thread and laughed alot at the comments and have to say i have alot in common with most eeek, so here goes, i lost 2 stone last year took 9 months tho, was very much on and off i`m affraid so here i am and with a positive outlook and with loads of support i am going to do this....

I have 2 reasons... a holiday to florida in may eeek, never flown before scared shitless too but it will b a whole load worse if i am sat for 9 hours with my humogous arse wedged in the seat .... not to mention the heat !

My DP and i want to try to concieve by the end of this year and i need to be uber healthy due to having pre-eclampsia with my other 2 and him having a still born boy (ex wife) so i wont put him through the risks of having to go through it, so very good reasons.

I have added a few of you guys on MFP as i am one of those people who need support to get off my fat arse annnd change my life for the better, so here to losing lbs together!

Is anyone tempted by the forums?
Last time I did MFP I had a major run in with a girl who ate an entire raw onion each morning, and couldn't understand why that was amusing. She was not pleased when she attempted to move the thread along by asking for suggestions for vegetables to eat with ham and I responded with 'Have you considered onion?'. I literally laughed at my post for about 3 hours afterwards. In honesty I'm laughing about it again now.

It was a Hairy Dieters recipe. Very nice it was. Very filling.

DEEP FRIED CHEESE? I am disgusted and aroused all at the same time.

Wawa skittletits

aJumpedUpPantryBoy Mon 07-Jan-13 20:27:27

I'm JumpedUpPantryGirl on MFP.

MaureenShit Mon 07-Jan-13 20:28:07

It's rare to find an over eater/ fattie who is very active ime.

And I am very conscious of mt weight fluctuations

MaureenShit Mon 07-Jan-13 20:29:08

I do the Kirstie allsop test. Any fatter than her and that's bad. Although saw her on tv and thought she's piled it on recently.

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 20:29:24

God Donkey grin

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 20:29:51

I know! I was so happy about Kirstie being a biffer again <bitch>

juneybean Mon 07-Jan-13 20:30:14

I did just LOL reading about the onion Lula

Welcome to the thread, gobby! You have a good set of reasons there to want to get healthier. May they spur you forwards away from chiefdom wink

Lula, bwah ha ha ha! grin

MaureenShit Mon 07-Jan-13 20:30:45

Agree with shiney. Bin the booze. And you will be hungry.

Was just at body pump with a woman who could barely do one sit up. I vowed never to abuse my body that much.

RandallPinkFloyd Mon 07-Jan-13 20:30:52

lula I am weeping at "have you tried onion"!

The deep fried cheese was fucking immense. I got the cheese sweats and everything blush

MaureenShit Mon 07-Jan-13 20:31:09

Lol. She was wearing cheesecloth Pinot.

Pinot Mon 07-Jan-13 20:32:26

In penance for her vintage shite? So she should.

MaureenShit Mon 07-Jan-13 20:33:10

Btw forum freaks. I think. They can over focus the mind on food. Go and distract yourself. Not circle the fridge like a crazed lion.

Go for a walk with your iPod in. Walk really fast in the dark to music or an audio book. But a drink of something low cal at ye olde Spar them come home.

(Plus you escape bath time !!)

gobbymare Mon 07-Jan-13 20:42:48

hey thanx baublesandcuntingcarolsingers

Right, I'm distracting myself with some classic Victoria Wood
'I sometimes think being widowed is gods way of telling you to come off the pill'
Laters potaters

spb have mfp'd you !

gobbymare Mon 07-Jan-13 20:53:21

is anyone else about to watch embarrassing bodies ?? starts @ 9pm on c4, its like shaming me into staying on my healthy eating way of life and losing the flab !

Ha ha fuckweasel!!!

Pontouf Mon 07-Jan-13 21:23:14

Loving this thread. I am a proper biffer at the moment but am 27 weeks pregnant so can't really do that much about it. I was 5 stone overweight before though so really am fat not just pregnant. Now that my morning sickness has finally stopped - at 24 weeks angry I am looking to just maintain my weight for now if I can. I have out on about 18lbs since getting upduffed but put on over 3 stone with my previous pregnancy and was the same staring weight.

Good luck everyone, let's banish armpit snatches, back hamsters and chaffed thighs in 2013!

Pinot that autocorrect link made me cry and wheeze with laughter. Not a kind thing I do to a woman whose pelvic floor is hanging on by a thread.

hevak Mon 07-Jan-13 21:43:11

I think I need to join you. I haven't weighed myself since, ummm, September last year? blush I didn't like the number that came up, so I didn't weigh myself again! I know I've gained weight since then, mostly over Christmas. blush blush My clothes are all too tight and this is definitely the biggest I've been.

I'm on MFP, which I used briefly years ago, and I've just started using it again in the last few days. I'll try to work out how to add people so you can kick me when I mess up. I might have to weigh myself again though, because the weight that's on there was my starting weight from last time and I'm at least 5kg heavier than I was then. sad I'm so angry with myself that I've gained so much weight.

If I add you on MFP please don't kick me for eating McD's nearly every day for the last week, I'm kicking myself enough already

aJumpedUpPantryBoy Mon 07-Jan-13 21:48:59

hevak,don't worry about last week - you can't change the past, you can shape the future

MaureenShit Mon 07-Jan-13 21:53:50

You need to weigh every week, in life, I think. To maintain. And avoid elasticated waists.

hevak Mon 07-Jan-13 21:56:42

Thanks Jumped. I've been doing the Shred since 2nd January and I tried Ripped in 30 for the first time today, so hopefully it's all going to help. I'm aiming for 1200 calories a day (on MFP), but I've decided I'm happy with up to 1600 - and to vary my total calories from day to day. Apparently your body gets used to getting 1200 (or whatever) calories a day and stops burning calories as quickly. I've read that you're better off eating 1400 calories one day, 1200 the next, then 1600 the day after etc... apparently this keeps your body burning calories faster. I'm hoping this helps me a bit, and is more realistic given that I eat more on some days than others anyway!

aJumpedUpPantryBoy Mon 07-Jan-13 22:03:36

I tried the Shred last year but I have a dodgy knee and it completely knackered it for ages. I'm aiming to walk more which probably isn't the best was to lose weight effectively but I'm not a gym/exercise class person at all.

hevak Mon 07-Jan-13 22:15:54

Yes, I have a dodgy knee and I avoid level 2 of the Shred which seems to be particularly bad for those of us with knee problems. I go straight from Level 1 to Level 3 now! Luckily when I was at school I did a lot of sport, so I've been taught the correct techniques for the moves the Jillian does (or I can make a pretty good guess at what the correct technique should be!) so I've managed to avoid making my knee any worse. I'm not sure how much of that is dumb luck though! I'm off to bed now - I have a long day at work tomorrow whcih will leave no time to exercise, so I'd definitely better not fall off the wagon food wise! grin

<waves at new pals>

Right, at the end of my first day. Found it touch. Got very very hungry after dinner but was narly up to my calorie allowance.
Had forgotten how hard this is. Ended up diving headfirst into the nutella with a tea spoon (and not logging that bit!!)

Will get there...

Log everything. Even if you go over. Even if you have to guess weights. It's the only way!
Thanks for friend requests everyone, nice to meet you all

Fern123 Mon 07-Jan-13 22:35:32

Ok this the funniest and most honest thread I've ever ever read on mumsnet and I've been mostly lurking since 2009!
I weighed myself this morning and it was hateful, have put on half stone over Christmas so not good! I had have lost 2 stone since DD was born last year but totally lost my way as Christmas approached....the cheese eating celebrations began at the end of October confused
But I have made a start today and u lot have strengthened my resolve to get back on the wagon!
By the way that auto correct link was hilarious, was crying at masturbating, menstruating, meditating! Tho I might be slightly hysterical at the thought of the hard work ahead as DH says its not that funny!

sassytheFIRST Mon 07-Jan-13 22:45:59

Armpit snatches, back hamsters and hip slugs, begone!

Starting in earnest tomorrow.

PinkyCheesy Mon 07-Jan-13 22:52:40

OK I just read this whole thread and have downloaded MFP and put in todays food and exercise. I have 2 1/2 stone to lose, can't run, hate fitness videos etc. Will be walking a lot and changing eating habits. Got school reunion in June, first time back in 25 yrs so I need to look decent!

can't work out how to add you all as friends but please feel free to add me and I will ,make my diary public toosmile Humiliation is good for the soul.....maybe....confused My MFP name is panda101paws

I think you're all fab by the way! its no coincidence that fab and fat start with the same do skinny and sad...grin

MajorBumsore Mon 07-Jan-13 22:59:41

I also am a Munter. Took some <ahem> very honest naked shots of myself on iPhone this morning in an attempt to slap my fat chops into gear. I was however so horrified by the fat old ( god I look old) dog in the shots, and believe me, they were foul, that I deleted them all.
Unfortunately, I went to take a pic of dd later in a shop and they don't quite delete, so there was the last shot of my fat gunt at the bottom. I could cry.
Lost half a stone in a month before Xmas by low carbing, and it was great when people started noticing.
Tried low carbing again today and sat resolutely whilst kids ate their lunch and had water, then caved over a fucking cinnamon swirl.
Back on the wagon tomozza.

Flisspaps Mon 07-Jan-13 23:07:50

I'm going to have a go at the 5/2 diet - so just 500 cals tomorrow and Thursday, but just eating normally the rest of the week so it's not one amount every day.

As long as my overall week has a deficiency then it's ok - I just need to make sure that 'normal' eating isn't being greedy or eating for the sake of it.

I think I may have PCOS but don't want to have the tests (my one sister has it confirmed, we think another sister probably has it too) - symptoms of too much body hair blush, bad skin, trouble losing it seems I need to lay off the carbs as well which is a shame as I'm a carb junkie sad

TrickyWoo Mon 07-Jan-13 23:13:38

Pleeeeeease let me join!?! I have messaged some if you on MFP, need to get back on wagon. Lost 4 stone last year, sold all old clothes, put 1 stone back on and Must lose it (ideally 3.5stone let's be honest). Would like to be 10 stone when my friends start turning 40... Facebook pics etc etc.

snice Mon 07-Jan-13 23:25:33

This thread has cheered me up no end. I'm about to be fifty quite soon and feeling miserable about having turned into a fatty. Am def. delusional though as in my head I'm still young and slim(ish) however horrible Christmas photos have seen that idea off once and for all.

Don't discriminate between sweet or savoury snacking-happily eaten half a choc orange tonight followed by some tortilla chips.

SO-have signed up to MFP as snicelydoesit and if you don't mind will trawl this thread tomorrow for peoples usernames to shame me into keeping it up

<sadface looking at pork pie>

CarriedAwayAnnie Tue 08-Jan-13 00:02:55

maureenshit - how do you do salad ( no dressing) and protein at lunch when you are eating lunch on the go ie not at home?

CarriedAwayAnnie Tue 08-Jan-13 00:05:07

And do you have carbs with your tea eg rice with your veg curry?

shine0ncrazydiamond Tue 08-Jan-13 01:00:06

I meant to add something bups but forgot earlier .

If you want to lose 3.5 stone, then it is an exercise in futility to start at 1200 calories. As you lose, say, 20lbs, you have little room for manoeuvre. You're setting yourself up to fail.

Far better would be for you to start at 1400 calories and carry on with this for maybe a stone and a half and then reduce to 1300.

I'd also recommend moderate carbing. With calorie counting its very easy to have a day that looks like this ...

Breakfast - cereal
Lunch - sandwich
Snack - banana
Dinner - pasta

So - you may be on target calorie wise but you've eaten a steady stream of carbs all day. Far better is to keep carbs to one meal a day ( I do breakfast when I have porridge and berries ) and eat no white carbs at all. They are pointless wastes of calories.

Also a change in mindset helps. Try not to think in terms of ' days off ' as its not helpful. I'd also recommend revising your goal. Don't think about having 3.5 stone to lose. Right now - if you're for example , 13 stone 7 , set your target at 12 stone 13. It's achievable in a relatively short time scale and once reached it motivates you to aim for the next goal. Set targets for BMI and inch loss too- oh and take photos! I cringed at mine but the difference between then and now is astounding

Fb message me and I'll send you my mobile number and send you some before and after pics of me. I got to 9 stone in a year from over 15 and have maintained for almost 5 months now . Trust me - on seeing my before pics you're going to feel a whole heap better!

runningforme Tue 08-Jan-13 01:11:23

Stop looking at the number on the scales! It makes no discrimination between fat/muscle/water etc. Eat fat - good fat! Avocados, real butter (not chemical marge), eggs, whole milk (fend off osteoporosis in old age), olive oil, coconut oil etc. Smaller portions of carbs - and good one at that ie, whole grains, coloured not 'white' as in sweet potatoes/squash/pumpkin instead of white potatoes. And eat smaller portions of everything. Chuck out all the processed food and sugar. Eat tons of greens.
Eat this way and you not only enjoy your food more, you will lose weight, be much healthier and will be satisfied because you need the fats to feel full and satiated and for hormonal and mood balance. Check out 100 days of real food. I have been doing this and have added in exercise and I have lost weight (no idea how much, but I had to go out and buy a whole new wardrobe because my clothes were hanging off me!). I relapsed over Christmas, but surprisingly my clothes fit just as they did before. Good luck!

runningforme Tue 08-Jan-13 01:15:47

oh, and if you can, check out the documentary 'Hungry for change' it explains how the information we are fed as to what is healthy and what is 'not', is completely skewed. I watched it on netflix, but I am not in the UK.

spamm Tue 08-Jan-13 03:19:10

Not a great day today, but not too bad either. I was in a meeting from 11.45am to 5.45pm, so I drank 4 bottles of water and ate a Mexican salad at lunch, but also went for a bl***y brownie cause I just lost the battle with my willpower.

I manage a low carb dinner to try and counter balance. And lots more water....

I am 43Spamm on MFP. See you all tomorrow. By the way, I am in the USA, hence why I am posting so late.

MaureenShit Tue 08-Jan-13 07:12:33

Carried. Tomorrow for eg I'm have ing left over ham. Chopped up onto bite size pieces with tomatoes rocjer and cucumber.

MaureenShit Tue 08-Jan-13 07:14:00

Carried. No carbs at lunch or tea.

MaureenShit Tue 08-Jan-13 07:40:03

right i have bitten bullet with MFP and have already written down a lot of what i intend to eat today

Jut weighed cereal its ahem 74g ( bran falkes in a hurry)

Morning. I have shredded and eaten some porridge. Raaah!
I have decided to only to weigh in on the days where i manage a big poo before breakfast? Y'know, for motivation.

Flisspaps Tue 08-Jan-13 08:46:32

I had 3.5 hours sleep on DS's floor last night. He's teething again, to coincide with day 4 of sleep training. Oh joy. I feel like shite. And today I'm fasting - so no sugary treats. I'll be in bed at the same time as the DC tonight.

FellatioNelson Tue 08-Jan-13 08:50:01

<arfs> at 'hambeast'.

What a great word Bups. I have never heard it before. Have you patented it? I fear you may need to.

FellatioNelson Tue 08-Jan-13 08:51:06

Shiney get lost - you were NEVER 15 stone. I refuse to believe you. You are a wisp of a girl. A mere slip.

shine0ncrazydiamond Tue 08-Jan-13 08:53:38

grin at fellatio. Well I sort of am now but I wasn't then that's for sure!

FellatioNelson Tue 08-Jan-13 08:57:08

Ok. There must be some explanation. You are 6 foot 7, aren't you?

nilbyname Tue 08-Jan-13 08:57:31


I have changed my MFP name to Atalune I am on there but with a crap profile and no picture...yet, but will get on it. I have friended some of you, will some of your friend me please? (lonely emoticon)

I am about to have porridge and banana for breakfast.

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 09:14:04

What happens when you go on MFP and get some friends? (currently it says quite damningly 'you have no friends'.

What do you do? Look at each other's profiles to see what you eat? Blimey.

I remember last february after I had been on a diet for 6 weeks, I had a mad bingefest on the contents of an all night garage and entered the lot. Thousands of calories of crap. I put it in MFP in order to try and put me off bingeing again!

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 09:15:14

Yesterday's entry:

7 shortbread petticoat tails (damn you christmas)
10 tuc biscuits
Turkey salad


FellatioNelson Tue 08-Jan-13 09:22:47

PMSL I have days like that Getorf. It starts off all worthy and goes pear-shaped at some point.

I get really annoyed with myself when I've wasted a bloody expensive Atkins protein shake for breakfast, and then had an almond croissant chaser. hmm

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 09:24:05

Shiney - right - I've changed my goals to 1400 cals, based on what you said . But I don't understand why? Can you explain why setting it at 1200 to start with would equal failure? If I can ^understand the logic of weight loss, then I reckon I'll have a fighting chance.

Good to have so many of you on MFP.

My muesli this morning was 100g - I poured a normal portion then weighted it. FFS - that's over 2 portions. But 45g looked like a bit of dust in the bowl.


nilbyname Tue 08-Jan-13 09:27:17

I dont weigh things! How do I know what a portion is, where will it tell me that. Bum, I knew I would be crapola at this!!

Lizzylou Tue 08-Jan-13 09:28:32

Shiney you do speak sense.
BUT you have to be able to let yourself off once in a while, don't you?? I have a weekend away coming up without boys, just me and Dh and he is taking me to posh restaurants <<aaarrrgh>>

I did 5km at gym last night, first time I have managed that in ages. Kettlecise tonight. Food all logged for the day.

I got motivated after Miranda lost lots of weight. She was looking far more feminine and svelte than me. Not good.

nilbyname Tue 08-Jan-13 09:28:50

I think I need to crash diet initially to show my body what's up and then I can adjust to a more normal food intake.

I have stopped boozing as well. It has nothing to do with my sprainned ankle from a boozey falling over. Nothing at all.

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 09:28:50

Do you find also that if you make one transgression (eaten sensibly all morning, then for some reason scoff a mini trifle) then you can't just chalk it up to experience and continue to eat sensibly for the rest of the day, but rather think FUCK IT and eat like a child at a tea party for the rest of the day, and start fresh the next day.

Why do I do that?

I agree with Maureen. No elasticated waists. Last year I bought a pair of duck egg blue skinny jeans and my legs looked so much like cold porridge in them it inspired me to keep at it. I never got any kick up the arse from wearing tights and woollen skirts, or leggings and baggy tops.

And there was a daft outcry about that Kate Moss comment, but I think it's a pretty good one. Eating that crappy muffin is a pleasure that will not last as long as a night out in a pair of jeans you couldn't do up last month.

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 09:29:14

Take what you normally eat, divide it in half. Then throw it in the air and whatever you manage to catch in your bowl is a portion. Apparently. <bitter> <cries>

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 09:29:26

lol at Miranda grin

shine0ncrazydiamond Tue 08-Jan-13 09:30:26

Pinot - OK... let's say you weigh 13 stone and want to be 9 stone. So, you start off quite happily at 1200 calories and the weight starts to shift. Eventually, the loss will slow down and plateau as your body gets used to its new calorie intake, so the thing to do would be to drop your calories to keep things moving and weight dropping.

If you have started at 1200 calories, what do you drop to? 1000? OK, so you do that..and great , another stone gradually goes. You then plateau again.... and it's not a good idea to drop to 900 calories as it isn't sustainable.

By starting at a higher limit you have lots more wriggle room. I used to be perfectly capable of putting away 3500 calories a day, no problem... < fondness for trifles, kettle chips, cheese and cakes > so I shall assume that some of you are similar. Therefore starting at 1400 or 1500 calories a day is already a big deficit based on what you usually do.

And the more you weigh, the higher you should start at. A woman weighing, say, 18 stone, should really start at 1750 calories a day. This would produce a good initial loss.

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 09:31:37

Ohhh gotcha. So it's about not letting your body plateau? Thanks thanks

Morning chunks (and not chunks --glares at Shiney--)

Shiney, do you reckon I'd be onto a go-er if I alternated calorie intake like Hevak says, 1200 one day, then 1400, then 1600 then back to 1200? I fear that my metabolism is sluggish anyway as past experience with WW/SW says that I lose weight well for a few weeks then slow down the halt completely. Perhaps I need to keep my metabolism on it's toes?

Ok, have set myself a short-term goal and it's 1.5 stone. I know, it's still a lot but honestly, the weight I am... a few pounds would be like chucking a deckchair off the Titanic. sad

My stupid Blackberry is incapable of recieving picture messages. It just chews them up and spits them out for some shit reason. I will cry if I have to take picture of myself.

Fellatio, I shan't patent hambeast. It is free for all to use. <generous>

Incidentally, has anyone tried sea kelp as a metabolism booster? I have got a bottle sat on my kitchen windowsill but I am unsure of it. Can't find much info' online either.

shine0ncrazydiamond Tue 08-Jan-13 09:33:45

Lizzy - I think of it like this now.... I never have 'days off' if i was going for a meal out, it would be just that. Before I would think ' Oh a weekend away! I might as well just eat, eat , eat and 'start again' on Monday! '... and then it dawned on me that this way of thinking was not helpful.

I now < if i'm having lunch out, for example > enjoy the lunch and eat what I fancy. The crucial difference is that i will have eaten my usual breakfast and then won't eat again after lunch until I feel hungry and then I will eat something light to redress the excesses of earlier, if that makes sense.

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 09:34:46

I can't do photos either. I would tumble into depression.

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 09:35:23

Yes WHY do blackberries not let you recieve picture messages? What's the bloody point.

I am going to buy an ipad at the weekend. <apropos of fuck all>

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 09:35:32

You are so very, very disciplined Shiney love. V impressive.

shine0ncrazydiamond Tue 08-Jan-13 09:36:36

Bups - no. no need to do anything like that. It doesn't 'confuse your metabolism ' or keep it revved up. Far better is to just eat three times a day, don't snack, no alcohol and no white carbs. Restrict carbs to one meal a day. Account for everything in a diary. Stick to 1400 calories. IF you do this for a week, you will see a shift in your weight, guaranteed.

It really IS that simple... although obviously complicated by our minds. I am not a doctor but i could almost guarantee that there is fuck all wrong with your metabolism. You just need to buckle down and get on with it!

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 09:38:15

No carbs for lunch either? So salads...and...? Can you share some meal ideas?

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 09:38:32

This is like the olden times shiney diet threads where we all used Food Focus and not MFP <nostalgia>

shine0ncrazydiamond Tue 08-Jan-13 09:39:04

Err, I haven't been disciplined over christmas grin

I just couldn't stand it any longer. I have been overweight since having DS who is now 6. I only have a weight problem when I get pregnant and then struggle to shift it afterwards.

I never could have imagined being 9 stone again and wearing size 8.. I really was pretty big and lived in leggings and tunics...always depressing as i have a love of clothes and make up etc... Dunno- just decided to give it a really good shot and it worked.

nilbyname Tue 08-Jan-13 09:39:28

Shiney, what are white carbs? Is that like processed food?

So porridge is Ok cos it is a whole food?
White rice is not ok?

nilbyname Tue 08-Jan-13 09:40:31

sea kelp yes I used it after my 1st baby. I think it did help. It is also an appetite suppressant. Win win.

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 09:40:37

Soup for lunch is a good'un pinot.

I always have a soup or a salad for lunch.

Soup is carby, but not as bad a sandwich or whatever, and is usually very filling.

I know it is probably disgusting and non-gourmet, but those Heinz Big Soups are a good standby. They are really filling and you feel like you are eating a stew, however they are all pretty low fat, about 250 cals for a can (and those big 500g cans as well). And because they are full of chunky veg they feel very substantial.

FellatioNelson Tue 08-Jan-13 09:41:06

oh GOd I remember those. That was what Shiney was up to when I first joined MN.

shine0ncrazydiamond Tue 08-Jan-13 09:41:14

I'm vegetarian Pinot so eat a lot of quorn, tofu and cottage cheese.

A good day of eating would be...

2 poached eggs on a slice of granary

home made soup

chicken stir fry minus the noodles but with plenty of chicken

I am rubbish at meal plans as i tend to gravitate to the same foods

shine0ncrazydiamond Tue 08-Jan-13 09:41:46

Ha ha - yes, we had a thread that ran and ran and ran for several years. It was good fun

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 09:43:11

White carbs


Porridge I think is OK in moderation. I wouldn't have it for breakfast every day. It's no good if you are going to follow a strict low carb.

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 09:44:44

OK. It's a lot to take in (anyone else finding this?) It's like educating my brain. I know I said in my first post what works for me (when I can be bothered) but I guess as I always fail to be bothered, it's not actually working is it.

So I've had muesli today.
Lunch could be soup (no salad in the house)
Dinner could be chicken tit and veg?


Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 09:45:36

I want something smothered in cheese

"Do you find also that if you make one transgression (eaten sensibly all morning, then for some reason scoff a mini trifle) then you can't just chalk it up to experience and continue to eat sensibly for the rest of the day, but rather think FUCK IT and eat like a child at a tea party for the rest of the day, and start fresh the next day."

Me! I do this. I am terrible. I will not do it anymore. <resolute>

OK Shiney, what you say makes sense. MFP is insisting that 1200 is the right way for me to go. I am so confused. I think I will go with what you say though and switch to 1400 because it is more food because you are a dieting guru and thin.

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 09:47:36

That's why I've done, Bups. I'm listening to the buffed one.


I was planning on having scrambled eggs and a bit of smoked salmon for breakfast on a slice of rye toast.

Homemade minestrone for lunch (weightwatchers recipe)

Tuna and salad wrap for dinner.

Is this bad? Or should I switch and have the wrap for lunch and the soup for dinner? Mind you, the soup has pasta in it GAH

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 09:48:09

It still said on 1400 cals I would lose 1.2lbs a week.

Obvs if I exercise it'll be more (right?)

Lizzylou Tue 08-Jan-13 09:49:23

What is Chicken tit Pinot??

I do have porridge every day (those little sachets all weighed out, Oats so simple or whatever) and all other carbs are wholemeal (pasta/rice) and small portions. Am always under carbs on MFP I think.

Does anyone know where I can increase my calorie intake goal on MFP? At the minute it's glaring at me in red letters saying "1200 CALORIES, BUNTER"

I am under carbs, over on protein. Is this good or bad? Should I not be over on protein?

shine0ncrazydiamond Tue 08-Jan-13 09:52:47

Trust me, 1400 calories is right for you - hard when I don't know your weight. If you're 14 stone or more then 1500 would be a great starting point. Begin today and weigh in 7 days time.

I am not a believer in low carb < hope BIWI doesn't spot this! > I think moderate carbing is the way to go. This means you can eat fruit and starchy vegetables < I'd steer clear of too many bananas though > and the odd jacket potato etc. Cutting out whole food groups just isn't sustainable in the long term.

Porridge is a brilliant breakfast. I make this up on a fairly regular basis if anyone is interested....

take one of those glass jars with the metal fastening

in the evening, fill with layers of banana, berries, porridge oats, chopped apricots, a few nuts..whatever you fancy. top with natural yogurt and shake. Store in fridge overnight and et voila! A yummy cold porridge/fruit yogurt 'thing' - a jar lasts for a few breakfasts. Just tot up calories for whole thing when you make it.

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 09:53:16

Go to Goals, Buppers. Hold your arrow underneath the top menu My Home and it lights up in Orange. Change to custom settings.

Chicken tit is chicken breast - I'm just uncouth grin

Flisspaps Tue 08-Jan-13 09:53:27

Bups - on the iPhone app, it's bottom of the screen - More > edit profile > net calorie goal

spanky2 Tue 08-Jan-13 09:54:16

I am soo hungry . I watched embarrassing fat bodies last night to motivate me.sad I'm always high on carbs .

shine0ncrazydiamond Tue 08-Jan-13 09:54:20

I wouldn't get too hung up on what you are over on re carbs and protein. The first thing to do in week one is just to keep to your calories each day. Anything else is by the by right now, if you're in it for the long haul. Cut out the white good carbs < could you have sweet potato wedges instead of mash, for example? > and write down everything

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 09:54:23

More recipes please Shiney! I've copied that into a file

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 09:55:16

Oh sorry i don't have an iphone <fat munter and uncool>

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 09:58:18

I don't eat fruit. It's all bollocks.

Loads and loads of veg though, I won't get scurvy.

shine0ncrazydiamond Tue 08-Jan-13 09:59:24

Ooh it is DELICIOUS Pinot and really filling. Like I said though, I am really boring when it comes to food. I cannot cook at all which limits me further. I a more an assembler of nice things from waitrose if that makes sense?

A perfect meal for me would be sweet potato wedges, veg and quorn... you could have that but with chicken. Oh and I eat a lot of roasted veg < sweet potato, red and orange peppers, mushrooms > with feta cheese or goats cheese crumbled over the top. That is also delicious

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 09:59:32

Fruit is only naice when it's warmed by the sun, on holiday.

^ S'why I'm fat.

I'm going to take the dog for a walk. Laters Chiefs.

101handbags Tue 08-Jan-13 09:59:57

Leslie Sansone DVDs are your friend - power walking aerobics. Can build up from 1 mile to 5. It's not the most interesting exercise in the world but it's easy and it makes you sweat.

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 10:00:21


Sounds YUM. I like food like that. Thanks <squidge>

Right, have changed to 1400 and am scoffing porridge now with almond milk.

Didn't even need a sweetener in the porridge cos the almond milk is sweet innit?

Shiney, when you do your sweet potato wedges, how do you cook them? I've tried them before and they were a soggy mess.

CarriedAwayAnnie Tue 08-Jan-13 10:05:18

Thanks Maureen.

I am going to do MFp when I can face standing on the scales <<wail>>

I get confused by what is healthy and what isn't. Foe example shiney I would have said cheese not good but you crumble it on roasted veg and that's fine?

Lizzylou Tue 08-Jan-13 10:05:43

I do sweet potato wedges (have it tonight with quorn stuffed peppers), do em in frylight, quite chunky.

PoohBearsHole Tue 08-Jan-13 10:08:24

Baubles, I lost 44lbs on MFP - I admit that that was from when I was fully pregnant grin but in my defense my dc was 5lbs and I put on weight post birth.

However I did it from that and lost the 44lbs, I am Figgyrolls on MFP and have started back. It is helpful to put down what you eat just so you know! I too am back on 1200 although see you have changed to 1600 but I reckon if I am a couple of hundred over then I am still eating less than before!

Good luck, I have 21lbs I want to lose taking me to 11 stone. I would like to lose 28lbs but am giving myself a break at the moment!

CarriedAwayAnnie Tue 08-Jan-13 10:13:12

My shred dvd has come through the letterbox.

Ordered the bastard on Amazon Supersaver and wasn't expecting it so early - This means I am actually going to have to do it today isn't it?

But it's only 20 minutes right? Should I do it everyday?

[very unfit emotion]

shine0ncrazydiamond Tue 08-Jan-13 10:14:21

Annie - huge chunks of cheddar = not fine < oh but I LOVE IT > ... a reasonable amount of goats cheese or reduced fat feta = great. Both are low in calories.. i buy a little circle of goats cheese and use half on my roasted veg ... it comes in at 152 calories for the cheese which is pretty good. I can have half a block of feta for about 130 calories. I avoid my favourite wensleydale with cranberries and ginger however as it is really calorific. I also eat a lot of cottage cheese < waitrose one is the best > and grilled peppers light philly.

Re the wedges.. in an overware type dish tossed in some oil < fry light is probably best for you right now until your weight loss is under way as a tablespoon of extra virgin adds 100 cals plus > with some salt or pepper etc if you fancy that. Bake for up to an hour. The trick is to do them on a lower heat and chuck them about a bit several times during cooking.

Flatasawitchestit Tue 08-Jan-13 10:16:51

Sorry to but in here, I haven't read all of the 15 pages but I use the daily free workout apps on ipad / iPhone

You can get free butt workout, leg,abs, cardio, arms, yoga. Can choose 5, 7.5 or 10 min workouts. They're fab and research has shown that you can achieve as much fat loss by doing short bursts of intense training (like above apps and the shred) as you might do jogging for an hour.

I tend to follow a high protein diet, packed with nuts, seeds, fruit & veg. The only thing I limit is carbs, I wouldn't cut them completely but be wary of eating too many.

Oh and drink drink drink. Apart from the obvious Fat has to leave your body somehow.

RandallPinkFloyd Tue 08-Jan-13 10:17:06

You lost 6 stone shock bugger me shock

shiney you are now my official chub-be-gone guru.

1400 it is <gavel>

shine0ncrazydiamond Tue 08-Jan-13 10:17:12

I also wouldn't stress to much about exercise. It's the diet that shifts the weight in the first instance. So, in other words, no need to fling yourself into everything on day one. You'll fail. Get the eating under control first - that is the crucial thing. I lost the bulk of my weight with no exercise... started by with a personal trainer when i got closer to 10 stone i think < Personal training is way to go, although sounds a bit wanky - and you can usually get a taster session free... it makes a HUGE difference if you use a gym.. no more will you just ineffectually jog on the treadmill or cycle. You'll be able to do a routine which actually gets results >

Flatasawitchestit Tue 08-Jan-13 10:17:59

Oh I also make my own protein smoothies, not to replace meals but in addition. If anyone would like recipe I can post smile

"I also wouldn't stress to much about exercise. It's the diet that shifts the weight in the first instance. So, in other words, no need to fling yourself into everything on day one."

Music to my ears.

<pops trainers back in wardrobe>

Yes please to protein shakes recipe!

shine0ncrazydiamond Tue 08-Jan-13 10:19:32

I probably sound like a know it all blush I am not at all - and those who know me well will know that I had many many false starts at this for several years.

It would make me really happy if , by sharing some of what worked for me, it helped someone else. the first lesson you need to learn ... you are going to feel deprived initially grin

shine0ncrazydiamond Tue 08-Jan-13 10:20:05

Yes, would like to see a protein shake recipe.

veryworried29 Tue 08-Jan-13 10:23:31

5:2 is just so much simpler than all this and sustainable for life. That's all I want to say. Plus, if you have lost stones and stones before and then regained them all, what is going to be different this time?

I say this in a caring way, I really do thanks.

I'll get me coat.

You don't sound like a know it all! It's GOOD to have a successful weightloss person here, to guide us, istead of letting the Chiefs groan and plod like carb-starved zombies through the mire of dieting.

shine0ncrazydiamond Tue 08-Jan-13 10:27:02

5:2 may be sustainable for a maintenance plan but I would be wary about doing it for weight loss as it can lead to overeating. Threads and threads on a weight loss forum I like to read prove this.

veryworried29 Tue 08-Jan-13 10:29:41

Oh really, can you point me in right direction? <am not going to use it to argue the toss with anyone, am genuinely interested>.

Flatasawitchestit Tue 08-Jan-13 10:31:41

I tend to use banana as its a good energy source
Skimmed milk - glassful
Naturally low fat yoghurt - few tbsp but if you'd like thicker play around with the milk /yog combo
Teeny bit of honey
Handful of oats

Optional : lower fat cottage cheese or peanut butter. Both have good amounts of protein. My OH is a gym bunny and swears by these.

Whizz it up in a blender. Now if you want extra protein, you could add 2 egg whites <boak at the thought> but make sure you wash the shells before cracking. It actually tastes fine, and does give you the added protein.

You can play around with the amounts to suit.

I make up one of these in the morning and put half in fridge for afternoon to go with a snack.

The first one sounds lovely... the cottage cheese/egg whites might take a bit of working up to grin

Thanks Flat! Are the oats just normal rolled/porridge oats?

RandallPinkFloyd Tue 08-Jan-13 10:33:37

Thoroughly agree that exercise isn't important just yet! (don't actually own a pair of trainers [ashamed face])

So can I genuinely just walk a bit quicker with the dog for now? <hopeful>

Dying at pinots portion controll!

Flatasawitchestit Tue 08-Jan-13 10:34:22

I just use cheapo rolled oats!

shine0ncrazydiamond Tue 08-Jan-13 10:36:45

Oh feel free to argue with me grin

Check out a site called minimins and go to the JUDDDD forum. < Johnson Up Day Down Day Diet - it's the same thing , all intermittent fasting >... I truly believe it's GREAT if you stick to the proper guidelines and eat healthily etc... but all it's doing is creating a calorie deficit same as day to day old fashioned calorie counting. So, if you don't stick to the limits, you won't lose. And weight loss is slow < faster if you have a lot to lose, however > .....

Flatasawitchestit Tue 08-Jan-13 10:37:34

super & weightloss foods

I used this list as a rough guide too, it just gave me a good idea of what to stock up on smile

Lidl is great for oats, nuts, seeds etc at reasonable price.

The only problem with nuts and seeds is that you can have about 2 of them for 100 calories sad

momb Tue 08-Jan-13 10:45:38

Hello, long time lurker and shameful overeater here. Please may I join in if you are working up a support network? I have at least 4, preferably 5, stone to lose and have become noticeably unfit (puffing and blowing a lot). I don't have a budget for a specific plan, but will be calorie counting/lowering fat initially until some of the weight is off and I can get more exercise. [hopeful smiley]

Proper fat munter signing in, probably should start off by throwing my hat in for the title of Queen Chief grin.

Have a haauuge amount to lose compared to most of you (think 10 stone>), but have decided that after various forays with SW/WW and some half arsed attempts at healthy eating, 2013 will be the year I make a significant change to my weight.

Have been off the booze since Friday - a major achievement - and have had a stomach bug since Sunday night, which seems to be a good kick off point for doing it properly.

Have joined MFP "MisfitNotMissFit" if anyone would like to add me...will add photos of my untidy house if that'll sweeten the deal?!

Hello momb and Superman, new chiefs!

It's lovely that we're getting such a thread together isn't it. It's made me feel so much better about being Big Chief SittingBlimp.

Will add you on MFP, Superman. Momb, come and join too! It's free and piss easy from what I can see!

CarriedAwayAnnie Tue 08-Jan-13 11:05:26


I've just done the shred.

I can't honestly say I will ever do it again.

<<passes out>>

The Shred fills me with fear.

I put it into my Amazon basket and then took it backout again just before checking out. That's as close to doing the Shred as I will ever get.

PoohBearsHole Tue 08-Jan-13 11:12:02

I have shred in the cupboard [runs away] it hasn't made it out the packet yet and is at least 14 months old blush

CarriedAwayAnnie Tue 08-Jan-13 11:12:53

I've downed a litre of water and I can beathe again, it actually wasn't that bad looking back. It wasn't pretty esp as I had to use two cans of baked bins as I have no hand weights grin

At the time it was hell but then I am very unfit!

The cardio parts were fine it's the strength parts - I'm not sure I'm adopting a good enough position so it could just all be a waste of time as I'm not exercising the right muscles.

I don't think I will ever be able to do a decent push up. Ever.

I just want to pop back in to tell you all something that shocked me into doing something about my weight. I had a free pt session at the gym and half heartedly told the instructor I needed to lose three stone.

He got me doing some exercises and then handed me a ball weight to hold onto while I did some stepping. It was heavy.

Afterwards he told me that it weighed a stone and that I was carrying three of these around with me every time I moved so no wonder I felt sluggish. I was shock at having it put in such a tangible way.

Try putting a carrier bag on your scales and filling it with tins until it's at the amount you want to lose. Then pick it up and see how much extra your body has to lug around on a daily basis.

CarriedAwayAnnie Tue 08-Jan-13 11:21:41

PoohBearsHole - Get it out when you have a chance and give it a go.Don't think about it. Just get it out and put it in the DVD player and see how you go. I was fully prepared to quit if it was beyond me but I managed to get through - just. I feel physically ruined but it's given me a boost to make sure I eat right for the rest of the day.

Thanks for the advice about the cheese Shiny. It's knowledge like that which will really help. I don't have to cut cheese out and view it as a 'bad' food, I need to switch and eat small amounts.

Now all I have to do is climb the stairs on my post exercise shaky legs and weigh myself so I can join MFP. Will it be ok to add you all?

travellingwilbury Tue 08-Jan-13 11:27:46

I am a chief too sad proper sad face .

I am now officially sodding obese .

I hate to think how many times I have tried and failed to lose my wobbly flabby bits * waves at shiny with shamed face *

But I am now actually bloody obese I can't ignore it .

I have joined mfp , I am neverthisfatagain , please add me and kick me .

I gave up smoking in Oct , surely if I can do that then stopping mainlining lard should be a doddle ?

momb Tue 08-Jan-13 11:28:07

I've joined MFP, am MofMnB and have no idea how to add people yet but will work it out!

shine0ncrazydiamond Tue 08-Jan-13 11:29:49

Ha ha re the Shred. Shudder at memory of Jillian barking ' DON'T DIAL IT IN ' or whatever it is she shouts regularly....

I am on MFP but don't update it regularly enough for it to be worthwhile adding anyone. I'd like to stick around on here though..not to dispense my snake oil type wisdom but because maintenance is as hard as dieting and i need to cut back after christmas anyway.

If you'll have me that is : )

shine0ncrazydiamond Tue 08-Jan-13 11:30:40

Hello TW! A familiar face from back in the day!

Look, I eventually did it after years of faffing about and you will too.

travellingwilbury Tue 08-Jan-13 11:36:45

I have the shred of evil but I am saving it for emergencies .

I have decided that the first week I don't lose,any weight I will have to do it .

If the thought of getting shouted at by gobby doesn't keep me on track then nothing will .

CarriedAwayAnnie Tue 08-Jan-13 11:39:55

grin @ gobby

NaiceDude Tue 08-Jan-13 11:40:07

Does anyone else just HATE Sweet Potatoes? HATE HATE HATE

juneybean Tue 08-Jan-13 11:40:40

I do love minimins side bar, I love seeing the percentage of weight loss.

Do add me on mfp -> jefnerf

PoohBearsHole Tue 08-Jan-13 11:43:09

I use MFP (or did) for logging my weight and food intake but was also part of a group like this one and it really worked for me.

As I say I have lost 44lbs with still another 21-28lbs to get to healthy rather than overweight as BMI but I have gone from Obese to overweight. I have slipped yes but I have to say that it was only by 7lbs over the last year up and down, I am currenly 1lb over what my lowest weight was on MFP before we went on holiday and I cocked it all up which started the slippery slope to the added 7lbs but they are off now and I am going to continue, I am hoping after this break and a bit of maintenance that I shall start losing weight and keeping it off again.

I hope.

Re the shred - but I have a cough, she might kill me wink

CarriedAwayAnnie Tue 08-Jan-13 11:44:38

DD1 feels the same as you Naice.

I prefer them tbh.

For wedges, I sprinkle them with salt and paprika, cut into wedges and then slowly cook them on a low heat so they go all soft inside.

For roasting I cut into roast potato sized and dry roast them on 200 for about 40 mins. I have them instead of roast potatoes for Sunday lunch.

DottyDot Tue 08-Jan-13 11:50:36


DoubleMum Tue 08-Jan-13 11:50:54

I have added myself to MFP as Doublemum, and also incidentally just thrown out 3 chocolate oranges and a box of after eights from the Christmas Food of Doom pile. DH will just be grateful I expect.
(To my shame I felt the need to take them out of their packets and put them in the yukky part of the bin in case I was tempted to take them out and eat them later!)
I've also set my target as 1400 cals thankyou Shiney, but I have a lot to lose so it might need to be higher. I wanted to low carb before, but we owned a sandwich business and needed to eat the leftovers as we had no money, so it was a bit difficult! The business has no folded and I can be bread-free if I wish, but most the of the time I don't wish.

Oooh no I LOVE sweet potatoes.

My favourite kind are the sweet potato fries that they do in a Mexican restaurant in Birmingham <punches own face>

MaureenShit Tue 08-Jan-13 11:56:52

Anyone doing spin or pump? Spin is most excellent. Go to a beginners class. You'll sweat for Britain.

Chubfuddler Tue 08-Jan-13 12:03:58

The shred is on the way to me via amazon ....

Am at work. Might stick it on at lunchtime in the conference room and watch whilst eating a subway

drfayray Tue 08-Jan-13 12:08:18

I lost 35 kg in a year (oct 11 to Oct 12) and I did it by changing the way I looked at food and of course exercising.
I have about 10 kg to lose now (went from a size 20 to 12) but it is more to do with fitness for my new obsession: dancing.

I go to the gym about 5 times a week (had a trainer in the beginning) and I also do Latin and Cuban dancing about 4 times a week. I do lessons and I also dance for hours at the dance parties. Vair good exercise!

Take a look at my pix as i have a before photo there.

My marriage breakup was one of the incentives. I also knew that if I didn't watch it I would end up being sick or dying before my time. Life is too much fun for that!

Have goals that you can work towards and be kind to yourself.

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 12:09:04

you stay put, Shiney - and you, Mo.

Dog walked, cauliflower soup cooking + feeling good!smile

Lizzylou Tue 08-Jan-13 12:11:29

I do spin occasionally Maureen. They changed instructors so class isn't as good.
Love Kettlecise at the moment, gym (crosstrainer and treadmill) and swimming.

Am signing up for some challenges this year.
I did some last year as well, just ate more calories to compensate and ended up heavier hmm

nilbyname Tue 08-Jan-13 12:21:23

I have made chicken pie for dinner. Tis going to be hard not having any of the puff pastry. Will of STEEL!

Is cous cous OK? I knwo it is pasta but it is made from the whole grain. I am confused.

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 12:22:09

Spin is brilliant - you burn ridiculous amounts of calories. Go for a 30 min session to begin with, though, fgs.

My enjoyment of spin is directly related to what music they play. So really uptempo house music = yes. Crap like Bon Jovi = no.

Body pump is also very good, the only one out of the Body attack/body balance classes I like. It's really good and fast paced. It is a bit lungey, though, so if you have dodgy knees it is not a good idea (dd has knee trouble and she loathed body pump)

veryworried29 Tue 08-Jan-13 12:22:13

Jeepers DrFay! You are v gorgeous!

Drfayray, now I have to come out of lurking but you look absolutely amazing. You might be my incentive.

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 12:24:39

faywray I read your breakup thread last year, I am so pleased that you have got through that horrible time and life is better now.

You do not look 50 for god's sake, and what a lovely photo of your children as well. smile

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 12:25:47

Mind you, you were very good looking when you were overweight. No sideways growing face for you!

amimagic Tue 08-Jan-13 12:27:22

I'm not really a joiner - crap at joining things generally - but will lurk around here if you'll have me.

I'm liking the big soup idea for lunch, also Shiney's yogurt & porridge brekkie , my problem is i need quick and easy stuff when I'm in work. (eat breakfast at work too). Any more quick ideas?

drfayray , you look AMAZING!

Lizzylou Tue 08-Jan-13 12:28:25

DRFay, you are gorgeous smile

If anyone likes dancing but is self-conscious about classes etc, Just Dance (we have for the wii) is fab. Loads of fun and gets you moving. Only exercise ever where I smile the whole way through.

nilbyname Tue 08-Jan-13 12:28:59

what about seeds and fruit as a breakfast on the go? 2 apples and a handful of toasted pumpkin seeds?

What are our thoughts on low cal/fat cereal bars? Work of the devil and a flase economy, or OK?

PoohBearsHole Tue 08-Jan-13 12:32:32

One of the things I found really useful to start off with is meal planning with the help of the Good Food Mag website (others available I just happen to love it and food porn it regularly) but they have by calorie intake and I made lots of quick and easy soups/ suppers. A really filling one that was yummy was:rataouille

I didn't serve with bread but by golly is it good!

DrFay well done, you look great! grin What an achievement!

Amimagic, lurkers are welcome! From past experience, the only thing I can say about eating at work is take things in with you. It's the only way that you can fully control what you eat. It's too easy for you to get caught on the hop if you aren't prepared and at the mercy of what's in the shop/cafe. I used to take in a box of cous cous with roasted veg (Shiney's idea of sprinkling feta on sounds lovely) wraps full of stuff like tuna and hard-boiled eggs with tomatoes/cucumber/spring onions, fruit etc. Bulgar wheat is also really good for making up in advance and eating cold. It's nice with some grilled chicken breast thrown in, I used to marinade my chicken in harissa paste/herb marinades etc, griddle cook it, then chop it and chuck it in. Very filling.

Low fat cereal bars are carp. Don't fill any gap or provide anything but empty calories sad

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 12:35:06

I don't think much of low cal cereal bars etc.

I think cereal in itself is a bag o'shite anyway.

Chubfuddler Tue 08-Jan-13 12:36:02

Blimey drfayray you were gorgeous before, now you look about 25.

nilbyname Tue 08-Jan-13 12:40:54

Ok, I did think that about cereal bars. I don't eat them, but have been tempted to throw them in my work bag for snacking. I will just stick to fruit.

realhousewives of OC is on the tele now. Whoooooop!

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 12:41:11

I am lucky because at the offices I work in they have a canteen which always serves soup of some description. So I have that and a double espresso for lunch.

Don't eat breakfast.

EAT make delicious soups as well, ime. When I was working in London every day last month I would actually look forward to seeing what soups they have that day. That makes me sound like the biggest loser on earth. grin

OH OH The Biggest Loser is back on TV now. That is such a guilty pleasure.

EAT do lovely soups but are they very healthy? Hmmmm. My favourite one was the french onion one with the big cheesy raft of a crouton floating on the top.

And then they did a meatball one...

nilbyname Tue 08-Jan-13 12:46:12

I live in the sticks. No EAT near me. I have packed lunches or just fruit and then have something when I get home.

I want to go to Los Cabos, Mexico, obvs after I have gotten rid of the mum tum

nilbyname Tue 08-Jan-13 12:48:29

getorf the biggest loser, I know not of this TV pleasure?

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 12:52:35

Just made this soup and it was frigging DELICIOUS. And 188 cals <preens>

Yeah but 5g of saturated fat

<runs off to avoid arse-kicking from Pinot>

It does look well nice though sad

TigerFeet Tue 08-Jan-13 13:00:42

OK have just reactivated MFP - I'm stripytigerfeet, please add me <needy>

Had a good couple of days foodwise, and I am going to stick to whoever it was up there ^ who said don't start exercising straight away as you won't be able to sustain too many lifestyle changes at once... this is very ^wise and I have listened carefully grin the truth is that I have knackered hips and knees and back and all sorts of other joints and if I do anything to strenuous it hurts a lot, for ages

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 13:01:44

Oh ballache. How much sat fat am I allowed in a day?

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 13:02:57

Google says 20g - so a quarter per meal. I think that's alright - twas soooooo yummy.

nilbyname Tue 08-Jan-13 13:11:34

thats the cheese pinot wink

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 13:12:28

Yeah. 100g cheddar split amongst 6 portions.

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 13:14:25

The Biggest Loser = Jillian Michaels shouting at people on a treadmill, and then they all get weighed and they lose something like 20lbs in a week (and if they don't Jillian shouts at them again)

ICBINEG Tue 08-Jan-13 13:15:39

I see some other No Excuses people have been on so you probably already got invited to join us in the dieting zone...

I'm posting to wish you luck and to tell you I have been doing 1200 kcal per day (well prob more like 1400kcal but then Bfing) for 3 months and have lost 2 and half stone so far. So you can do it too!

nilbyname Tue 08-Jan-13 13:17:04

Shouting at chiefs! Yes!

Lizzylou Tue 08-Jan-13 13:21:30

ICBINEG, wow that is amazing! well done you grin

I love cheese Pinot, do you think it would work with half fat cheddar (a good one with lots of taste?).

ICBINEG Tue 08-Jan-13 13:25:30


argh now I feel Ive been boastful but I really just wanted to say that the 1200kcal approach can work.....without the evils of shred or anything like that.

Although I was thinking of getting zumba fitness for the wii? Anyone have any opinions on that?

ICBINEG Tue 08-Jan-13 13:26:04

I still have much weight to shift btw...mine is a work in progress...oh yes indeed.

amimagic Tue 08-Jan-13 13:30:41

Thanks for the ideas all.

Bupcakes, is it really bad that i don't even know what Bulgar wheat is? <rubbish cook>

It sounds good though - is It a good food to eat?

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 13:31:37

What is zumab exactty?

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 13:32:08

Jesus christ. Zumba. Is it like salsa dancing for tiresome women

TigerFeet Tue 08-Jan-13 13:37:55

I have a zumba thing for my wii getorf

As soon as I get the wrapper off it I'll let you know what it is exactly grin

CarriedAwayAnnie Tue 08-Jan-13 13:40:51

PoohBearsHole - That recipe looks really nice. I've added the ingredients to shopping list to make next week. Thank you thanks

I love the Good Food site, if you have any more from there that you've tried and tested and don't mind linking to, I'd really appreciate it.

ICBINEG Tue 08-Jan-13 13:43:53

ohh I used to do salsa <is a tiresome woman>

CarriedAwayAnnie Tue 08-Jan-13 13:49:38

One good thing about h leaving last July is that I can cook what I like without anyone moaning about it being low fat/carb or meat free.

I have discovered I'm not really a big lover of meat and prefer meat free. It's strange to be 31 and only just realise this.

H was appalled the on Friday when he picked the dc up to find them eating quorn hotdogs. To me they taste just the same, their low in fat and the dc like them ... win win win.

I want to join a spin class! But I am fat. And I would end up red faced and puffing in no time. I'm not sure I can do that in public. And I'm 99.9% certain I wouldn't make it to the end of the class without having to give up or dying

drfayray - you are gorgeous. Well done. I hope I can turn myself around like you have.

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 13:51:30

PLEASE more linking for recipes thanks

lizzylou Is there such a thing as a half fat cheddar? That'd be great. I wonder if parmesan would work? I added half a tsp of cumin to give it some pep, the cheese is just a touch of flavour, really. At 33g per portion it's not much.

I have another cauli in the fridge, I'll try with parmesan maybe tomorrow.

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 13:51:40

Oh I am rude to generalise.

But someone at work ages used to go salsa dancing, and she was tiresome. She used to do salsa moves when we went clubbing where they played grime music.

So I just think zumba classes are full of people like her <bitch>

Lizzylou Tue 08-Jan-13 13:59:49

Zumba is brilliant fun gerroff you funsucker!

Pinot yep, most supermarkets do their own ranges, I've got a good Pilgrims Choice one, very mature and half the fat. But yes, less amount of a parmesan type should be good.

DoubleMum Tue 08-Jan-13 14:06:29

Inbineg that's fantastic. I managed up to 2 stone before but it all (and more) went back on. A permanent lifestyle change is needed.
Pinot that soup looks good I wonder if it would work with frozen cauliflower? I have some in the freezer and don't really like it, but for soup it would be OK I think.

"But someone at work ages used to go salsa dancing, and she was tiresome. She used to do salsa moves when we went clubbing where they played grime music."


ICE, you don't sound boastful! We NEED people to come and tell us how well they've done because it is motivating! So brag away grin

I was going to do Zumba as DS's school then I realised that all of the PTA mums were going to it so I didn;t go <starts PTA fight on a diet thread>

ICE? Inbineg <ahem>

travellingwilbury Tue 08-Jan-13 14:13:16

Well who knew ? You can actually eat only half a thing of covent garden soup and a couple of ryvita , you don't have to have the whole thing with two slices of toast and butter . grin

DoubleMum Tue 08-Jan-13 14:14:31

<Well who knew ? You can actually eat only half a thing of covent garden soup and a couple of ryvita , you don't have to have the whole thing with two slices of toast and butter . grin>

I definitely didn't know that. I'm not sure I believe it even now.

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 14:15:21

Haha at the pta mums doing zumba.

I used to go to aerobics, dd used to come sometimes and sit at the back of the hall with a book (poor sod) - she reminded me the other day 'do you remember mum when you all used to go speed walking in a line round the hall whilst that woman shouted at you' grin

I really liked aerobics - old fashioned jane Fonda stylee. Unfortunately my STUPIDLY expensive gym doesn't have aerobics. Just shite like pilates.

travellingwilbury Tue 08-Jan-13 14:17:22

I have got zumba for the wii and it did actually make me all knackered and red faced and sweaty , so I guess it works ?

I obviously did it for a couple of weeks and then got bored , lost motivation , got fatter . I might dig it back out , it is certainly a lot less scary than gobby Michaels shouting at you .

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 14:17:48

I had that moment of epiphany with tubs of houmous, when I realised that they supplied those pots with lids so you could put the lid back on and in the fridge for another day. you didn't have to eat the lot all in one go.

And don't get me started on the post of 4 mexican dips. They don't come with a lid. So you do have to eat them all. With tortilla chips. And queso.

LOLing at "And queso"

I wish I was mexican. Mexican women are allowed to be portly, aren't they?

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 14:19:24

I love gobby Michaels.

I like the shred, but her best DVD is No More Trouble Zones. 7 lots of 6 min exercises - you can do the lot, or as many as you like. All strength stuff so none of that cardio nonsense (I can't bear jumping about at home with DVDs).

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 14:20:26

My downfall are homemade nachos. Bloody hell.

ICBINEG Tue 08-Jan-13 14:20:41

<may actually have done the salsa nightclub thing>

but only because I cant dance! <wails>

Lizzylou Tue 08-Jan-13 14:22:23

Arf at shouty woman.
When I went to my first ever spin class I cam home to DH and said I couldn't believe I'd just paid to torture myself like that whilst a rough scary northern bird shouted at me.
BEST Spin instructor I've ever had.

I quite love Ripped in 30.
Say what you want about Jillian, her stuff does work.

travellingwilbury Tue 08-Jan-13 14:22:35

Doublemum I know it has been a revelation , the other half might go the journey at that hideous 4pm grab a biscuit / bag of crisps/ chocolate stage of the day but I figure that is ok .

So far if I do end up eating the rest of the soup later , I reckon I will have about 400 cals left for dinner , that is doable .

I am working on the 1200 cals mfp thing , did I see something about making it 1400 being better ?

crossing fingers

ICBINEG Tue 08-Jan-13 14:23:29

bups you are allowed to be portly too! But you don't want to be...because you don't want health horrors ruining you life and you DO want to be around for your family for a good long time! I have tried losing weight because current western society doesn't find me attractive and it didn't work.

I am now actually losing weight because my DD deserves a mum who can chase her around well into her well...40s at least.

<oh god I am actually the tiresome woman that getorf knows>

DoubleMum Tue 08-Jan-13 14:25:02

travelling I believe shiny said if you had quite a bit to lose it was better to start higher. I do, so I've adjusted to 1400. At the moment I'm not really hungry so am not really eating but that probably means I will be ravenous after the school run and eat the sofa.

travellingwilbury Tue 08-Jan-13 14:25:41

I agree , the shred is brilliant and it does work , but it is just so sodding scary and a bit painful .

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 14:26:03

<beady look at ICBINEG>

Do you have pink accessories on your desk (inlcluding a pink cafetiere with your name on?>

Please say no grin

travellingwilbury Tue 08-Jan-13 14:28:28

Well I have officially tipped into the obese so I figure that qualifies me for 1400 cals , That shiney always did talk a lot of sense wink

agadoo Tue 08-Jan-13 14:28:31

Love this thread !!! I'm on the large side myself...I put all the weight on due to bad eating and lack of motivation...Now I run 2 to 3 times a week and I have joined the gym..I put half a stone on at xmas because I have stuffed myself with gorgeous cheese and dessert with 1000 calories a slice, at least a box of ferrero rochers a day...I have been running again recently after stopping due to a foot injury and my bum seems likes he is in another dimension as he doesn't move at the same time as the rest of my body IYKWIM ?? I have 2 stones and a half to lose ! I'm on mfp and my nickame is fabiennelaurence.

The reason I'm exercising too, is to earn more calories. I am a greedy lady.
But I feel like I need a nap now

Icbineg you are RIGHT. I know you are.

This is the most ashaming story I will ever tell... (well, I do probably have worse tbh...) but last year, I panicked and thought I had Type 2 diabetes (i'm a candidate alright) dry mouth... tired... thirsty all the time. I ran to Boots and spent money on a home diabetes test. I wasn't diabetic, thank fuck. However, when I got home, DH was giving me the side-eye. "You've eaten 2000g of salted cashews in ONE DAY, no wonder you're dry mouthed and thirsty you daft twat!" That's what he said and he was RIGHT.

I am a monster.

TheSecondComing Tue 08-Jan-13 14:34:16

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 14:34:22

Fererro rochers are quite easy to eat. You start scoffing as you read a book and suddenly you realise the roof of your mouth is sore and you have eaten the whole box.

Christ this thread is like a binge confession time for me.

I can either be very, very good. Can keep to a diet no problem when I am in the zone.

But when I am half arsed about it I end up scoffing loads of crap.

I need to learn to eat healthily and moderately.

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 14:37:30

TSC I used to put shred/Jillian Michaels workout as calisthenics, vigorous effort. 20 mins, 178 cals.

Riding a bike, vigorous effort (which is what I put for spin) is 700 cals burned for an hour class.

But I never eat my deficit, iyswim. I just eat what I normally would, no extra for the workout.

ICBINEG Tue 08-Jan-13 14:38:42

Pheeeeww. Nope I HATE pink! (oh it's just another colour is it? IS IT? Is that why you would rather chop your own arm off than dress any of your male offspring in it? IS IT?)

On the other hand that means the number of definitely tiresome women in the world has just doubled....

TheSecondComing Tue 08-Jan-13 14:40:20

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheSecondComing Tue 08-Jan-13 14:41:07

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 14:41:14

couch to 5k sposed to be v good.

I did lol at the typo to Bumpy, soz Bupsgrin

ICBINEG Tue 08-Jan-13 14:41:25

bups wow that is indeed a lot of cashews. I don't think I can get close to that (in the nut world - if we move into creme eggs then go for you gun cowboy!)

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 14:41:48

You have to watch it on MFP - some of the entries are wrong (I remember a happy moment when I entered a scotch egg or something to see it was zero carb and 60 calories before the penny dropped)

Alreet TSC.
I add the shred under circuit training, for 22 minutes. Think it's about 186 cals.
Are you dying of exercise today? Going downstairs on your arse?

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 14:42:20

Atre you the secondcoming on MFP?

I am CarbyClaire btw <twat>


<crushes TSC to death>

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 14:44:02

I did something called a fat fast last year (when I was low carbing and plateaued for a few weeks).

5 days of 1000 cals per day, and he food had to be majority fat.

So - 2 packets of macadamia nuts a day, or a couple ozs of pate or full fat philadelphia and 8 gallons of water. And more coffee than starbucks.

I will never eat a macadamia nut again - delicious as they are.

Crying at CarbyClaire grin

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 14:45:00

I don't like nuts of any kind <chaste>

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 14:45:35

I know!

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 14:47:06

I just stood up and got proper lightheaded sad

TheSecondComing Tue 08-Jan-13 14:47:33

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheSecondComing Tue 08-Jan-13 14:50:21

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

It's no fun. But the best remedy is to do it again.
I started it again, so ill be in that state tomorrow.

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 15:02:04

Jesus TSC that sounds a bit grim. I shut the car door onto my face the other day, that bloody hurt.

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 15:06:23

I need to upload a photo onto MFP. The only one I have on this laptop is me pissed at a festival (and I look it) or with a terrible frumpybob.

nilbyname Tue 08-Jan-13 15:14:39

5 sea kelp tablets and 5 glasses of water.

I am shredding tonight. Then I have a pile of ironing. I have jsut cleaned the kitchen.

How many calories does h/work take up?

dinkystinky Tue 08-Jan-13 15:51:36

This thread is making me roar with laughter. Was fairly depressed at turning into a human weeble through a combination of pregnancy and christmas (where I didnt drink, didnt eat mince pies/sweets/xmas pud/stollen etc but still put on fricking weight) but this brilliant thread of chiefs has made me put it all in perspective. Thank you. And FWIW Shiney's advice up thread is spot on.

FellatioNels0n Tue 08-Jan-13 15:55:50

At the risk of sounding stupid, what is MFP? haven't read whole thread.

theowlworrier Tue 08-Jan-13 15:58:35

I did the shred last night- on day 4. It is a challenge for the weak of pelvic floor, but very good. Jillian is scary, and I did have to pause it for a second to go for a wee before the jumping jacks forced the issue. Very dignified.

Notfootball Tue 08-Jan-13 15:59:28

Can I join you? I'm losing faith only 8 days in and need a huge boot up the arse.
How do I add you on MFP? My username is Elfme and the only 'add friends' options I can see are via email, FB or my phone contacts.

dinkystinky Tue 08-Jan-13 16:01:13

CarriedAwayAnnie - if you want to do a spin class, do it! Everyone had to start off being the unfit one in the class at some point. And the glow you get when you realise its getting easier/you're not dying at the end of the class each week is definitely worth it.

DottyDot Tue 08-Jan-13 16:01:25

Thank god for this thread. I lost 35lbs a couple of years ago and have kept it off until this Christmas, when I went COMPLETELY BANANAS and have put almost a stone back on blush

So.... back on the wagon. Basically being a Good Girl eating-wise, low carbs, low fat, high protein, no chocolate-y crap. Wine at the weekends 'cos otherwise I'd have to jump off the roof. And the occasional Haribo when I need a sugar-fix 'cos no-one's perfect grin

Oh and I had been cycling in to work but my bike got stolen in November and I couldn't afford to buy a new one before Christmas - but it's on the list now so am frantically checking ebay and gumtree - need to get cycling again as that really helped keep the weight off.

Need to lose a couple of stone - the one I've put one + one more. Bring it on! <determined>

CarriedAwayAnnie Tue 08-Jan-13 16:15:57

I'm having the same problem on MFP Notfootball - How do you add people?

To add people on MFP, go to the Community tab at the top, then search members. Then you can enter the username you're looking for in the search box on the right hand side smile

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 16:23:02




Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 16:24:41

Fell, it's My Fitness Pal website.

Brill free site for monitoring your gobbling (food intake) and your wobbling (exercise).

CarriedAwayAnnie Tue 08-Jan-13 16:28:01

Thanks Baulbles smile

I'm CarrieAnneAway if anyone wants to add me!

Tabbykat Tue 08-Jan-13 16:34:43

Have lurked for a couple of days and would love to join you ladies if I may?? Lost stone and a half last year with diet and shred but had major lapse and have now put it all back on, plus almost another stone blush

Have resolved, this year it all HAS TO GO! Thighs are chafing, and last week I couldn't even get into my "fat" jeans. Have nothing that fits and my stomach looks like a separate entity, it's got so big. Ideally want to shift three stone, so back on the shred - it hurts but it works! Am a lazy cow so Jillian shouting at me is good.

Have just joined MFP (as darklydreamingofdamon) if anyone would care to be my friedn? Please? Think it'll help me keep on track.

How's everyone doing today?

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 16:36:28

I have "fat" jeans too. Look <points> I am wearing them sad

sassytheFIRST Tue 08-Jan-13 16:36:40

Hello fatties.

Had a VG day today, being back at work - busy, not surrounded by chic etc - helped. Day 7 of LoveMyLiverJanuary too - starting to feel like I can do this. Am motivated.

DoubleMum Tue 08-Jan-13 16:39:25

Can I ask, does anyone else sometimes turn into some kind of ravenous werewolf-type creature who eats everything in sight?

PoohBearsHole Tue 08-Jan-13 16:41:51

Well if you want to be added here we go for new round up of MFP friends:

CarrieAnneAway - Carried Away Annie
Figgyrolls - PoohBearsHole
Getorf - if you aren't carby claire then who the fuck are you as have just friended a stranger grin
Notfootball - elfme

any more for anymore?

PoohBearsHole Tue 08-Jan-13 16:43:14

Sorry I confused the Issue:

Carriedawayannie - MFP CarrieAnneAway
PoohBearsHole - MFP Figgyrolls
Notfootball - MFP elfme

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 16:43:31

I'm ChieftoKitten

Lizzylou Tue 08-Jan-13 16:47:37

darklydreamingofdamon - Tabbykat, hello and welcome!
I am LizzylouM

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 16:48:16

DottyDot Are you on MFP?

RandallPinkFloyd Tue 08-Jan-13 16:48:36

I did a spin class once, it made me throw up [fatsadface]

Gutted, just been reminded that I'm going out on Saturday. I really really want to drink ice cold cider that isn't out of a can. If I save up loads of calories between now and then will I be allowed?

I haven't been to a public house since my friend's dad's funeral in September. <whines>

This here ^^ this is why I'm a bloater isn't it.

winefairy Tue 08-Jan-13 16:50:20

I need to join, if I may? I lost my own mind over Christmas and went into some kind of turkey induced feeding frenzy.

I need to lose a stone. A stone and a half if I'm truthful.

I will resume Shred, not eat lard and check out MFP.

However all this will start tomorrow as I've already binged badly and therefore today is broken so I will treat myself to the obligatory calorie laden dinner swimming in fat and start afresh in the morning.

For the rest of the day I shall be sponsored by Lindt.

nilbyname Tue 08-Jan-13 16:51:26

winefairy I like your logic!

sassytheFIRST Tue 08-Jan-13 16:52:35

Can someone congratulate me on not drinking booze for a whole week?

CarriedAwayAnnie Tue 08-Jan-13 16:54:17

I just had a txt from Dominios about their BOGOF Tuesday pizza nights.

That's not helpful is it?

I have no idea how they got my phone number blush

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 16:57:07


sassytheFIRST Tue 08-Jan-13 16:57:34

grin Pinot

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 16:57:37

Sorry for caps lock but it kinda works! smile

Pinot Tue 08-Jan-13 16:58:03

xpost grin

"I just had a txt from Dominios about their BOGOF Tuesday pizza nights"

Actual LOL!

I bet you're doing the same puzzled face as I did when I got a christmas card from the indian takeaway and when the chinese takeaway gave me a freebie calendar/box of dim sum for being "most excellent customer"

blush grin

MaureenShit Tue 08-Jan-13 17:01:16

I'm. looks about icodd. Yes like edd the duck FFs.

Some other fecker had me other name.

I'm jot really into following on there but hey if it floats yet boat

noddyholder Tue 08-Jan-13 17:01:26

According to MFP if i eat what I ate yesterday every day I will be 8st by mid feb grin

Tabbykat Tue 08-Jan-13 17:02:52

Thanks, Lizzielou! This whole two names thing is v confusing...

winefairy Tue 08-Jan-13 17:05:15

nilbyname Thank you! And it's no doubt blatantly obvious that it this very logic that got me into this mess in the first place grin

MaureenShit is a great name btw but I am a bit afraid of you

DoubleMum Tue 08-Jan-13 17:07:46

Well done Sassy. Me too.
I've got the Dominos email too (it can't possibly be because we had Dominos last week ...)

I brought Christmas cake into work. The marzipan and icing are calling me

travellingwilbury Tue 08-Jan-13 17:08:55

Add me add me , needy sod that I am

Shit I have forgotten who I am ! Idiot

aJumpedUpPantryBoy Tue 08-Jan-13 17:09:03

I brought my marking home tonight instead of doing it in school because someone bastard had put cake, biscuits and sweets in the staffroom and at 4pm my willpower seems to be at an all time low.

MaureenShit Tue 08-Jan-13 17:09:59

Good gal. Drink tea

MaureenShit Tue 08-Jan-13 17:11:00

I am scary. I dont get doing a diet and cheating. There's just no point. It's like walking up a down escalator.

PinkyCheesy Tue 08-Jan-13 17:11:31

This is so great smile

I really feel like I might manage to stick at this diet with so much support from you ladies. Am loving MFP, amazing how much it will do considering its a free app. I have it on iphone and tablet so I can update on the go. very impressed with the scanner and the facility for putting in a whole recipe (used that for my homemade bolognese). Also very illuminating to get the nutritional breakdown...I hadn't realized how little calcium and Vit D I was getting.

great advice from Shiny about calorie targets, thanks for that. And the recipes look good. I am looking forward to having soup at lunch again. I make chunky ham soup (ham hock, potato, carrot, pearl barley, peas, onions, and ham stock) and take a soup flask out with me sometimes if I'm out at midday and might get tempted by greggs supermarket sarnies grin

Keep up the good work chiefs!

MaureenShit Tue 08-Jan-13 17:11:38

And dominos ? EW vile hydrogenated veg fat and corn oil

MaureenShit Tue 08-Jan-13 17:12:23

At body pump yesterday when I lunged I could rest some flab on my upper leg I think.

Looked vile in mirror.

noddyholder Tue 08-Jan-13 17:12:44

What is the following for? To snoop?

MaureenShit Tue 08-Jan-13 17:13:07

Agree mfp good. Also to put in in the am what you plan to eat.

travellingwilbury Tue 08-Jan-13 17:13:52


Obviously not as catchy as I thought .

aJumpedUpPantryBoy Tue 08-Jan-13 17:14:36

Going back into work clothes this week (as oppose to slobbing around in leggings) has made me so aware of my stomach. I actually feel uncomfortable in my own skin.
Maureen, you're right. I'm an all or nothing person - if I'm going to lose weight I'll stick to it otherwise you are just wasting your own time by doing it for a few days and then giving up - all of the pain, none of the reward

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Tue 08-Jan-13 17:14:49

Yes, I am CarbyClaire on MFP.


Determined to start tomorrow. Stone by valentine's day (fuck knows why then, am single)

I like thefollowing for a few reasons;

1. It shames you into not being a fat cnut (only if you are being honest and logging EVERYTHING will this work though!)

2. Getting ideas for eating.

3. Giving pointers to friends i.e "YOU'VE EATEN CARBS ALL DAY, ERIC BRISTOW. PACK IT IN"

That type of thing.

"And dominos ? EW vile hydrogenated veg fat and corn oil"

I agree. Pizza Express is so much better. wink