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Bereavement

M/C, D&C tomorrow I'm so scared

50 replies

Xena · 18/05/2005 13:20

I'm so sad saw the baby on the scan they think it died at 10 or 11 weeks. I'm so scared about the General Anastetic tomorrow what if something goes wrong and I leave my 3DC's with no Mum. My blood pressure is quite low and I'm so worried.

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dyzzidi · 18/05/2005 13:22

Xena I am sorry for your loss. The D&C is a minor operation and I am sure you will be fine. Its he emotional side of things which will be harder. I have had two D & C's and apart from some period type pains was actually fine by late evening.

thinking of you

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Donbean · 18/05/2005 13:23

sweetheart, im so sorry for your loss.
You sound like you have got the world on your shoulders.

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Louise1980 · 18/05/2005 13:23

I havnt had an mc but I have been under general anasthetic. Im sure you will be fine. I cried all the way from the ward till I went to sleep because I dreaded not waking and Im here to tell you. Explain your fears to the anesthatist before you go down and Im sure they will reasure you.

On the same note my friend had her D+C yesterday and she's fine.

Hope everything goes ok. I will be thinking about you.

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Nemo1977 · 18/05/2005 13:23

AWW xena..sorry about your loss hun
i had all the same worries before my D+C and also kissed my son good bye. However it was over and done so quickly that i dont think u are under long enough for any problems to become big issues iykwim
let us know how you get on

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Xena · 18/05/2005 13:29

Thanks, I was hoping for people to tell me that the GA was OK they have said that I can talk to the anethenatist sp?? before I go down hopefully I will be out in 4 hours. I'm dreading telling DS when he gets home from school we hadn't told the DD's but he will be sad.

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beatie · 18/05/2005 13:30

I am sorry for your loss. I had two miscarriages and the second resulted in a D&C or a ERPC as they call it now. Makes it no mor epleasant whatever it is called.

It IS a minor, short procedure and everything will be fine. Make sure you get lots of TLC afterwards. They'll give you painkillers for afterwards. I was lucky in that I did not have any discomfort afterwards.

My hospital offered me counselling but I did not take it. If you feel you'd benefit, take the offer.

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Nemo1977 · 18/05/2005 13:31

xena u should be home quickly i went in at 8am and was home by 3pm and the last 3hrs of that was sitting around while they made sure i was ok etc.

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Bella23 · 18/05/2005 13:36

Xena - Honey {{{HUGS}}}}

I am so sorry you are having to go through this.

As someone who has had this in January I can genuinely tell you that it really is a very simple op and you will feel pretty full recovered by the next day. I too usually have low blood pressure but I don't think this is really much of an issue as you are under anasethetic such a short time.

Hang in there, ride the wave tomorrow and I promise it will all be over in a flash. Do make sure you take something to read though as its all the waiting about that is the hard part!!

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suzywong · 18/05/2005 13:40

Xena, heartfelt sympathies a exactly the same thing happened to me

As the others wisely say, it is a simple operation and will be over soon, just make sure you get to take it easy and off your feet as much as possible for a week after and you will be OK and ready to try again after 3 cycles

you'll get through it

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Marina · 18/05/2005 13:41

Xena, I seem to recall you are in my area. Are you going in to QE? There is a wonderful bereavement midwife there whom you can talk to about your understandable worries if so. I can CAT you with her details if that helps at all.
If my experiences of an induced late miscarriage/stillbirth are anything to go by, they are very kind and caring there.
I am so sorry your baby died.

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sweetheart · 18/05/2005 13:48

Xena,

I'm so sorry for your loss. I had a mc in January and we had already told our dd about the baby.

The only advice I can give you is to be open and honest with your ds. Children understand more than we give them credit for and he will take the news with a maturity you will be amazed by. If he's anything like my dd he will be so strong and loving it will help you through this terrible time.

My thoughts are with you and your family.

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dyzzidi · 18/05/2005 13:49

If you are still worried about the GA ask the aneathetist (SP??) for a pre-med. This is a sedative which will relax you whilst waiting to go down to theatre and generally makes me sleep. I have had a lot of surgeries and find its the waiting around which is worse so the premed really helps me.

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Hayls · 18/05/2005 13:51

Sorry I can't give any useful advice but I hope you are OK and thinking of you. Take care

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Bonkerz · 18/05/2005 14:13

sorry to hear of your loss. I too had mc in jan and had to have a d&c. was terrified of ga cos im obese but all went fine. i was wiped out emotionnally and physically after and even though im pregnant again the pain from losing my baby is still there but it does get easier. thoughts are with you.

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Xena · 18/05/2005 15:59

Thanks for all your kind messages I spoke to DS just now and he cried but I think more for the fact that he was hoping for a brother Its the same for me and DH the sadness for whats not going to be.

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Nemo1977 · 18/05/2005 16:03

xena the sadness is normal hun i know it doesnt help but there are soo many on here who have been through similair. I have had 3mcs and i have on ds who is 19mths. I had my d+c on 30th dec but am now 9wks. Things do get easier but u still get upset about what may have been.
If i think about it i should have a 9yr old a 4yr old ds and be due next month...but they were not meant to be.

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expatinscotland · 18/05/2005 16:03

Sorry for your loss, Xena. Many of us have gone through it and can commisserate.

But why do they do D&C's under general anesthesia? Bit like using a sledgehammer to remove a fly from someone's forehead. I had one under region block and IV sedation and it went fine.

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Nemo1977 · 18/05/2005 16:03

thats meant to be and ds and due..lol

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Nemo1977 · 18/05/2005 16:04

expat think it depends on hospital but ours was becuase of emotional trauma iykwim.

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expatinscotland · 18/05/2005 16:06

i wasn't awake, but i wasn't under GA. just sleeping. then it wasn't as hard to recover. but i don't do well with GA. that's just individual body chemistry, i guess.

sorry for the hijack, xena.

hope you feel better soon.

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dyzzidi · 18/05/2005 16:06

I think it is becasue of the emotional side of things why they do it under D & C. Personally I would not want to be awake during that procedure.

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dyzzidi · 18/05/2005 16:07

Sorry crossed post

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expatinscotland · 18/05/2005 16:11

but thing is, you don't have to be under general anesthesia to be asleep. you can be sedated to the point where it's literally impossible to keep your eyes open. but you're just asleep and don't need to be intubated.

had that with the wisdom teeth as well. it's called IV sedation.

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Xena · 18/05/2005 16:22

expat I wonder if I would be allowed that? I have had a GA before for teeth work and they had to bring me round as my BP was to low, the next time they used a heavy sedation which when I came round was like I was drunk, my mum had picked me up as DH had to work, she took me to sainsburys and apparently I was talking to people but I don't remember anything about it. They did say that it would be awfull to do it under a local. But maybe I could ask about that because I v. scared of the GA

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expatinscotland · 18/05/2005 16:27

i have a problem maintaining my body temperature under GA, Xena. apparently, it's a genetic condition. but GA does scare me for that reason. it also made me very nauseated and my throat felt horrible.

some people do just fine and are unaffected by GA.

but i'm not one of those. i've had three major knee surgeries under region block w/IV sedation. in addition to the D&C. so it is possible. i just felt sleepy and when i woke up the surgery was over. when i had a ligament reconstructed, the surgeon said i snored thru the whole procedure.

my dad also had his prostate removed with epidural anesthetic.

if you're concerned, talk to the anesthetist and stand your ground.

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