Have posted on here about MIL lots before...terminal cancer. Primary in the bile duct, secondary to liver and now they think pancreas.

Liver is ok, bile duct seems ok as stent been fitted, sepsis has diminished.

However, the latest thing is pain all up and down the spinal cord and her glucose levels are becoming increasingly hard to manage. They keep increasing the insulin and this makes her fine for a few days and then they have to increase it again

It seems that its taking more and more insulin for less effect. Is this normal with pancreatic cancer? She was diabetic to start with anyway btw

What to expect? Coma or??

Any help appreciated. Will post in general health too

have no advice but have a big hug for you all. good look and love to you all

So sorry for what you are going through.
Sorry I can't help although I have a friend who's mother died of P cancer and I don't think she went into a coma.
Hope you get advice soon x

Sorry to hear things have got so bad, Puss, my FIL died of pancreatic cancer, but he wasn't diabetic. He was on a syringe driver with morphine and basically unconscious for the last few days. My DH was diabetic and as I understand things your MIL is likely to slip into a coma if her sugar levels keep rising. I know your DH is with her, I wish you all strength for the days to come. Take care x

i know a bit about Cancer but not the pancreatic type, it is very common for people with cancer to go into a coma for a while before they die.
Steve was in a coma for over a week before he died, he had to be sedated thou cos he was very aggitated.
i was wondering how things were with your MIL, is your DH still with her?

DH was ill, but aware up to the last 3 days.

It does get harder and harder to control the diabetes, but in the last 3 days dh didn't really eat.

Do you really want to know what it was like at the end (serious question?) if you do, I can tell you. It wasn't easy

So sorry that you're all going through this.

My Dad died of pancreatic and liver cancer earlier this year. It is such an aggressive and quick cancer in many cases.

It was all very sudden in that he died a week after he was diagnosed.

Even within such a short space of time the deterioration was so sudden though. One day he was still able to speak to us, the next he was asleep for 90% of the time but just about able to talk for the short spells he was awake and then for the last few days he basically was in a coma.

He was sedated though due to getting agitated and restless but, surprisingly, didn't seem to be in much pain at all.

I guess it affects people in different ways though.

Thinking of you all

All - thank you for your replies. DH is back with me now...has been for two weeks. MIL was given 6 weeks to live 8 weeks ago so I guess she's doing well considering. They haven't done any more MRIs so they can't confirm it has gone to the pancreas but the continuously rising blood sugars and the pain in her spine is indicative it has.

I've been doing some research and am at reading just how painful pancreatic cancer can be - not saying that others are not of course, but apparently, its very aggressive I've heard that people can have a Coeliac Plexus nerve block to stop the pain or a group of drugs called sclerosants to block the pain...have passed all this onto DH to pass onto them should her pain increase

So far though, it seems as if a diabetic coma is more likely....I'm kind of hoping that happens to her first because from what I've read, the end stage pain is horrendous

MB - Thanks for offering to put me in the picture as to what its like, but I'd rather not know but really brave of you to offer.

DH thinks he will see her in Jan but the more I research about pancreatic cancer, the less I'm optimistic about this. Although of course, all will be as God wills it. I haven't told him just how quick it can be though...he can't get out there until Jan due to National Service issues so why make him feel worse???

I'll not go into details Puss, but you are right not be be optimistic.

The 5 year surviail rate for mancreatic cancer is essentially zero.

Dh was a very fit, healthy man of 44 when he was diagnosed. He never smoked, he didn't drink, he cycled to work every day, and went to the gym every week. He had everything to live for. He was fit enough to cope with a massive amount of chemotherapy....he had 3x the usual amount of the first treatment, and two other treatments. Most epople wouldn't have been physically strong enough to cope with that.

and he still died.

one thing I can tell you is that Dh wasn't in pain, they made damn sure of that. He didn't need the nerve block, but that was discussed at one time.

I hope that god grants your MIL a peaceful end and I send you and your family all my love and respect

MB - thank you so much and I'm in awe of how well you cope and to be able to post on here and offer me advice is just...wow...I really do appreciate it. I find that the more I know about things, the better able I am to support DH iyswim? I guess the inevitable is a diabetic coma then?

Hi Puss I have been thiinking of you a lot lately.

My Nan didn't go into a coma before she died - she woke up in the morning at about 6 had a little moan and a cup of tea and died at 8.40am.

She wasn't in pain they made sure she was comfortable and in the end it was peaceful.

I hope when the time comes your MIL will go peacefully too. Much love to you and your DH - I know how hard it is to be away from your family.

It depends if she carries on eating/ is given a drip

If she doesn't eat (dh didn't really in the last 3 days) she will not need the insulin.

Ahh I see...she is eating - not great amounts but eating and she has a protein shake that they buy from the hospital that is giving her some energy, although not as much as it used to so I guess that is positive.

I was kind of thinking ok, she maybe spared the pain and not realise as will be in a diabetic coma but I'm sensing now that this may not be the case....of course, no-one can predict but...bloody hell though, sounds as if it could be in the next couple of weeks as it seems so aggressive and fast....

positive that it still works that is....not positive it isn't working as much!!!

The end was very fast for dh, and your dh would be wise to be 'braced' for it.

DH had a hot air balloon trip on the sunday.

Was admitted to the Hospice on the Wednesday. Was begining to be 'out of it' for longer periods on the Friday, gradually became iller and iller, and died in the morning of the Monday.

But on the Friday he was well enough to recieve his MBE and joke about it with us.

The end was swift, which was a blessing.

Oh arse..... so weird though as she seems quite up and at it atm but I guess that's the nature of cancer...what a fecker..

So sorry for the losses of everyone that has been kind enough to reply and help me help DH through this

I would not count on DH seeing your MIL in January, FIL was diagnosed in the March and was gone in just over 3 months. So sorry for what you are going through . Take care x

Oh dear...we are entering into the third month since diagnosis now...mind you, its secondary in the pancreas not primary, but I guess its aggressive either way...

MartianBishop - just popping back in to ask a question if you don't mind (and anyone else that may know the answer). Dh called his mum tonight and thank God, she has been stable for this week - mobile, eating (although a little), same pain dosage and back pain allieviated with massage....glucose levels very high but being managed with insulin...

DH is so pleased but I'm worried as have heard of people plateauing out before....is this being stable normal? What to expect next?

Sending strength to you all, Puss

Hiya Boys - how are you?

We are good

DS2 fell down the srtairs today -top to bottom.

That was scary.

No injuries just jangled nerves.

Phew.

Ohh gawd...<hands Boys some choc> Boys are hard work....going off topic a bit, but were your two bad sleepers? DS (nearly 2 and half) screeches out in his sleep loads...I can only assume some form of night terrors?

Hey puss - I'm going to FB you, I have some news.

WMMC -oh no....<waits for FB message>

Puss, It is almost impossible for me to say.

Although your MIL has secondaries in the pancreas, dh had a primary in the pancreas, so the presentation of symptoms may be different.

I was fortunate in that the medics involved in DH's case had a very good idea of what was likely to happen at every stage. Your dh may be able to get this from the doctors involved in your MILs case, if necessary by pressing them for information which they may not, in line with local culture and tradition, give, IYSWIM.

<<munches chocolate>>

No, this was earlier today, Puss.

Night terrors - yep both of mine had them when they were toddlers.

Anyway, sorry to hijack.

MB - Yes, that's the thing, noone is saying what is going to happen, other than that she will die at some point. However, I think its just cruel as they are all happy that she is stable and has been for a week or so. I'm outwardly happy for DH but inside am thinking...arse...calm before the storm type thing...ugh...am fed up feeling so edgy...

<boys - can you cure the night terrors or just have to ride it out?>

<ride it out>

Giving you a big [squeeze]

<Whimpers....Ride it out??!! It will literally be ride it out - my deaf alert system for DS consists of a huge disc thing that vibrates under the matress...every time he screeches out the fecker goes like concorde taking off..you would think having something like that vibrating in my bed would make me but 'tis very draining>

Hi MB - me again! Sorry to keep asking questions. She is still stable . Did your DH have periods of being stable? Is it a normal part of the whole process? It turns out it was stage 2 in the bile duct, with nodules on the liver and now we think spread to the pancreas. Am really with the Dr that said 6 weeks as I think for stage 2, this was a stupid and upsetting prognosis!

dh responded to chemotherapy and did better for a while, but he was diagnosed when it was already at the stage 4 level. Which makes the situation different from that of your mother-in-law.

Have you thought of contacting macmillan in the UK and asking them for help? They would be able to give you advice on the treatment your MIL would get and her prognosis in the UK

Hi there, just wanted to mention a really nice book called 'singing the life' by Elizabeth Bryan. She had Pancreatic cancer and the book gives lots of useful information about the disease as well as being very moving and strangly positive too..

MB - its very hard to speak to the Mac nurses here because DH is already worrying that maybe what they are doing over there isn't enough or the right treatment and to possibly hear that from cancer experts here, knowing there is nothing he can do about it is just....its already caused an argument as I was questioning why the Dr gave such a poor prognosis for something that was stage 2 iyswim?

I said to DH, why didn't they do chemo or something as I know people with stage 4 here still have chemo but they said any form of treatment would probably kill her faster than the disease and apparently she nearly died when they put the stent in. I'm not so sure about that part as they do have a tendency to exaggerate over there. Either way, its just hard to suggest too much as they are just going down the palliative care route.

I'm the sort of person that needs to know what's going on and what's happening so I can plan (had PND after DS and I manage it by planning ahead blah blah) and the not knowing here - a month, 2 months or whatever is something I'm finding very hard...selfish of course as its that much harder for DH, but I'm talking from a family perspective and the upheaval of Dh possibly going for another month etc...although obv have not said this to DH - just offloading on here helps!

If your MIL is ill and frail, then she would find it very hard, if not impossible to cope with the chemo.

My Dh was 46 and an othewise fit and healthy man and the chemo was so hard for him to cope with.

You seem to 'need' more information....I can understand exactly where you are coming from on this. The best people to give you that information would be Macmillan. They can help you understand about your MILs disease.

Obviously they cannot comment on her exact case, and they don't have her medical notes.

I've joined the Mac online forum so maybe I'll post there...this sounds really really awful and I don't mean to upset anyone here by saying this, but I want timescales...I feel as if everything is so uncertain, we cannot plan anything and its stressing me out...is that awful of me? <worried>

Its because everything is so up in the air, that I'm finding this so hard to cope with - is she going to be ok and go for another year, if so thats great but if not...then what? Will DH be going in Jan, will we have to go with him?

Am driving myself mad and already had a panic attack last night...had just weaned myself off the antidepressants for PND when all this happened. I know this isn't about me but being strong for DH is taking its toll...thankfully I can offload on here... I feel a cow...