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my friend died and now im cross with my other friends

6 replies

newgirl · 07/04/2008 13:56

my best friend died recently and one of the things i am struggling with is that i now feel differently towards my other friends.

Has any one on here felt like that or has any advice to give?

I feel that my friend knew me for me, and that the friends I have now are because of the children or my dh and not about me - and it makes me cross and not want to see them. I haven't been horrid to anyone but I just feel like not seeing them. Does that make sense? What should I do?

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HuwEdwards · 07/04/2008 13:57

Give yourself some time. Grief distorts your feelings at first. You will eventually get your relationships with these frinds into perspective one again.

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HuwEdwards · 07/04/2008 13:58

oops, friends and once

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newgirl · 07/04/2008 18:44

thanks for replying huw

i am sure you are right - i feel more positive this afternoon - i certainly shouldnt take my feelings out on others

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HuwEdwards · 07/04/2008 18:46

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mumof2pixies · 07/04/2008 19:20

I know how you feel...I lost my closest friend recently, and its hard as although I do have other friends I feel totally alone...as my friend knew me for me and I was totally at ease with her. Although I do like and care for my other friends, its not the same. I also get cross at them for not grieving as much as me...which is ridiculous! Its getting better though, and Im just keeping myself busy.
You might find that not seeing them for a while will take the pressure off...maybe your dh could make excuses for you or something...or you could tell them you really dont feel up to socialising/meeting up right now.
I felt horrendous when I realised that I may never meet anyone friend wise that I will be as close to again, and makes all the other friendships seem trivial...I hated myself for that, and I gave myself a virtual kick up the arse! I now try and get out and about as much as poss with my dcs and dh and I know I'll find another friend who I can be close to again, it may just take a while.
hth and thinking of you x

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newgirl · 08/04/2008 10:11

mumof2pixies - thank you so much for understanding so completely - it has helped so much to read your reply