Where do I put myself - divorced but feeling bereaved

(2 Posts)
Hillfarmer Wed 28-Sep-16 09:40:44

Hi,

My XH's nephew has died. He was my children's cousin. It is a terrible tragedy and I feel devastated for the parents and rest of the family. I want to show my support and respect, I have written them a letter but don't know whether to go to the funeral as I feel it would turn the spotlight to the wrong place. EA XH is still bitter and explosive several years down the line. He doesn't give me information and he hasn't yet told our dcs. I feel if I turned up to the funeral it would be poisonous - and I certainly don't want that to happen.

I suppose there are other ways of showing support without going to the funeral. I feel that going to a funeral is an important gesture. Thoughts please. I'm not sure how to handle. Thank you.

Simmi1 Wed 28-Sep-16 11:25:08

Are you still friendly with the parents - would they appreciate your support and you being there? If yes I would go and ignore ex. If the parents don't want you there I wouldn't go as I do believe their needs would be most important in this situation. Really sorry to hear about your nephew flowers

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