My late husband's clothes.

(9 Posts)
Musicaltheatremum Thu 25-Aug-16 22:04:43

My husband died 4 and a half years ago. I have tried a couple of times to clear his clothes but couldn't do it. Sunday I decided to start and had a cry and today I finished it. I just need to take them to a charity shop. I have kept a few things. 3 shirts and a couple of jumpers that I loved.
We had a lot of wardrobe space so keeping it wasn't a problem but I hope someone will benefit from the clothes, lots of which are in great condition.

I don't actually feel anything about clearing the clothes now. He was 50 when he died, from a brain tumour and had been ill for 12 years prior to that. I miss him terribly but I feel that the time was right to do it.

AbbieLexie Thu 25-Aug-16 22:10:53

We also have the room so could take our time clearing things to the charity shops. We have the tax thing (very tired and can't remember what its called) and received a nice letter telling us how much we had helped them raise. We put a label on any bags or boxes we hand in.

flowers

BazHasUnfortunateEyes Thu 25-Aug-16 22:20:43

I'm glad you felt it was the right time Musicaltheatremum. It's great to know that your husband's clothes will be of use to someone else.

You've done a good thing today.
flowers

echt Fri 26-Aug-16 07:27:43

It's so good that you found yourself in the right emotional place to do such kind thing, Musical.

My DH died a few weeks ago and I sent his work shirts and suits to charity quite quickly; they had no emotional significance for me. His casual shirts and T-shirts are quite another thing, though; they are him. (And I can wear them) smile

Now I think of it, I wear a lot of his stuff for walking the dog; it's late winter here in Melbourne, so lots of baggy layers are good.

Redsrule Sun 04-Sep-16 20:32:40

Congratulations, it is a huge step. My DH, also 50, died 51/2 years ago and although I have given his clothes away I cannot part with his shoes. I know it seems daft but I have this image of him on a Sunday afternoon cleaning all our shoes...it still fills me with tears. A lovely, kind man who adored his family and felt it was important we all had shiny shoes.

tubasinthemoonlight Sun 04-Sep-16 21:38:37

Congratulations on feeling that you have reached the end of another stage of your grief. It must be a huge step for you.
My husband died 8 and a half years ago. He also had a brain tumour. He was 56, the age that I am now. He was only ill for a year, the tumour was very aggressive. We knew he would not have long as soon as he received the diagnosis. I felt the need to clear everything very soon afterwards which I know is different for most widows. I believe I felt that I did not want to put it off. I needed change and to put it all behind me. It seems bad when I put it like that I suppose. But I knew I couldn't hold onto him through his belongings so I kept only those items which meant the most. I miss him every day though. I still talk to him as I go through my day, especially in the garden as his ashes are there along with those of both his parents. Watching his son grow into a man who looks like his Dad breaks my heart as I see his smile on his face. My son was 11 when his Dad died. He is 20 now and is as lovely as his Dad. The only clothes we actually kept were his cycling clothes as we are a cycling family and I knew our son would wear those.

BikeRunSki Sun 04-Sep-16 21:53:11

Well done Musical, clothes are so hard. It took DM about 10 years to go through DF's clothes. He was a slightly excentric dresser, so some clothes were more distinctive than others - Gladstone coat, kilt. DM still has these, 23 years later. I have his pyjama top!

Topsy44 Thu 22-Sep-16 18:24:49

Well done Musical. That's a big achievement. You should give yourself a big pat on the back for doing so and I'm sure your DH is looking down on you saying well done.

I am 2 years into this awful journey and I am getting clear of my DH's clothes little by little. It's always heartbreaking but I can hear my DH being practical about it and saying 'get a friend to help you and just do it!'.

Big hugs to you.

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