My mum died Sunday morning,. She had a massive stroke and died. I am in a different country and didnt find out until 7 am.
It feels so surreal. I keep saying it to myself over and over..
my Mum died my mum died.. it doesnt feel real it feels like i am in some sort of bubble.
I haven't been close to her for years. we had a complex relationship. I felt she was more interested in my niece than my children. I felt she didnt care much about my children or my life as I was living in the UK and she was in DK.
About a month ago she called me and for the first time I can ever remember I had this conversation with her where she only spoke about my children. I even mentioned it to my friend how nice it had been to feel like she just wanted to talk to me and know what was going on in my life.
She came to visit me in Sep14 and I can remember as she went to go through to the plane I called her back to give her one more hug. I suddenly had this clear sensation that this was the last time I would see her. I was right.
Now she is dead and I wont ever again see her and right now there is so much to sort out and my head feels detached from everything else of me. I just keep hearing those words inside me...
As complex as she was and as complex as I am I loved her and I know she loved me. and now she is dead my mum died.
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my mum died
8 replies
Enkopkaffetak · 01/06/2015 12:49
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