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Bereavement

Im so wound up and sick with worry

4 replies

LittlePink · 02/04/2014 20:26

Im just at a point of sheer frustration and anger with things that shouldn't bother me but are at the moment. I don't really know where to post this but need to vent it out somewhere.

My poor dad is dying in hospital right now. Hes getting worse each day and my mum has told me tonight hes no longer eating or drinking or able to speak and is sleeping most of the time apart from shouting out at times.

One thing that has really got to me is my father in laws utter stupidity and thoughtlessness. He knows whats going on, he even came short notice last week to look after my 21 mth old while I rushed back home 200 miles to be with my dad during a crisis when he was admitted to hospital after a massive bleed. He has terminal stomach cancer.

Anyway, my FIL sent me a text a few days ago to say he had seen a funeral parlour with our surname on it. I thought ok perhaps hes just not thinking so i'll let that one go. Then a few days later he sent an email with a picture of the funeral parlour on. My husband cant see why im upset as he thinks it a source of interest and funny. One, its not a source of interest to me and two, its not funny. How can it be funny? Whats funny about that? Maybe im just having a sense of humour failure. Sigh.

Also, people keep asking me how long dads got left. How do I know? Do they want me to give them a date and time? Even my own husband asked me to call the doctor at the hospital and ask how rapidly they expect him to go because on casualty sometimes they give a time limit. I was so stunned at the bluntness of this, I couldn't speak. I finally mustered the energy to say im not going to call the doctor to ask this so you can give your work an idea of how long you're going to be away. What the hell is the matter with everyone?????

Sorry I just needed to get this out. Perhaps im not thinking straight through sheer worry and sadness that my dad is suffering so awfully and day by day hes getting quickly so much worse and is wasting away before us. I don't know what else to say :-(

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Applefallingfromthetree2 · 02/04/2014 20:36

Sorry you are going through this OP. I hope your DD stays as comfortable and peaceful as possible. It is a terrible time for you.

Your FIL sounds totally insensitive and you are right to feel annoyed. Your DH needs to get real IMO, support you and ask his father to respect your feelings. Their role now is to give you as much practical and emotional support as possible instead of acting like idiots.

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Borntobeamum · 06/04/2014 18:21

Hi Little Pink.
How are things? x

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LittlePink · 08/04/2014 19:34

Well im afraid my dear Dad passed away early hours of sunday morning. It was very peaceful and he died surrounded by his wife and three children. He is out of his suffering now but im finding it very difficult and just don't know where this path of grief is going to take me. Im feeling very sad and I miss my Dad so much already.

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something2say · 08/04/2014 21:18

Aww really sorry to hear the news. So sad for you all. Take good care. X

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