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Bereavement

Miscarriage???

3 replies

Poppyxyz · 13/10/2013 17:19

Why is the term miscarriage used when you have to give birth (like I did) to a dead baby at 7 months? Not to start a whole new dictionary, but surely miscarriage is not the right word. My baby was alive until I gave birth, but all the medical staff called it a miscarriage - feel this doesn't make sense - excuse the extreme sensitivity over terminology - on many levels its irrelevant, but am fed up with people's 'sympathy' over my miscarriage - I want to correct them and say, no, I gave birth to a baby girl, she didn't survive, but it was NOT a miscarriage....she could have survived, but sadly that was not to be for her - yes, of course I am grieving, but can we update/ refine the terminology a little

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Poppyxyz · 13/10/2013 17:23

Sorry, it seems so silly this thread, but am struggling with the response I am receiving...life goes on, but we need to get there sometimes with the help of others and realizing how alone one is at a time like this, just wish I could provide the vocab for my friends to help, I know, v silly of me, but there you go

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Oceansurf · 13/10/2013 17:28

Flowers I'm so sorry for your loss.

I thought after 24 weeks it was classed as a stillbirth? Very insensitive of the medical staff to call it a miscarriage. :( However, I lost a baby at 17weeks, which was classed as a mc and I didn't feel it came under that 'term' either. It's very different when it happens to you. I guess in the medical profession they just see it as a word?

Do you have support in RL? I had some counselling which helped enormously. So sorry you are grieving.

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Bakingtins · 13/10/2013 17:30

I'm very sorry about your daughter, Poppy. The words people use can help or hinder at such awful times. I think technically the medical staff are wrong anyway, after 24 weeks of gestation it is correctly termed a stillbirth, or a neonatal death if the baby was born alive and died shortly afterwards. There is a MN board on 'body and soul' dedicated to miscarriage and pregnancy loss support if it would help to talk to others who have been through similar. Flowers

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