Support thread for anyone who is grieving for a parent (2)

(973 Posts)
mummylin Thu 02-May-13 10:46:10

Welcome to our new home everyone. This should be where we all start to move on a little bit. Together we will cope.

mummylin Mon 08-Jul-13 15:55:18

Yes when there is no school you will have more time and you can spend a lot of it with your mum, if we continue having this good weather you can both relax just sitting in the garden. Does your mum get birds in her garden as they can be very relaxing to watch, if she dosent have one she may like a bird table or something so she could watch them and their antics

crazykat Mon 08-Jul-13 16:23:04

Thats a good idea. My dad's trying to grow his own vegetables in the garden so he tries to scare birds away. They've got a decent size front garden though so I'll see if I can get one for there so my mum can look out the window and watch them, the kids will love feeding the birds too.

One good thing about the warm weather is my mum isn't cold for the first time in months.

mummylin Mon 08-Jul-13 17:21:55

I think you can get feeders that stick onto the window now, haven't seen one but this is what I was told, maybe something like that would entice for her .

mummylin Mon 08-Jul-13 17:34:28

Yes you can get window feeders I just looked them up on amazon, quite reasonable too.

crazykat Mon 08-Jul-13 18:58:16

Thanks, I'll have a look and see if I can get one for her.

likesnowflakesinanocean Mon 08-Jul-13 21:47:58

omg I am so ill never wanted my mum more. I am burning stomach so painful, dizzy and head like its being squeezed. can't sleep but can't do anything else either. dp just phoned and was useless all I want is a tiny hope your ok maybe a bru too

mummylin Mon 08-Jul-13 21:54:27

Oh crikey , he long ave you been like that for. Do you need a doc ?

mummylin Mon 08-Jul-13 21:55:44

Could it be sunstroke ?

mummylin Mon 08-Jul-13 21:59:50

Is your other half due home soon ?

likesnowflakesinanocean Tue 09-Jul-13 07:30:59

just yesterday didn't feel too brill took ds swimming got out and just so faint and headachey. dp still not home works long hours, hopefully if rest today will feel better

BiscuitsandBaileys Tue 09-Jul-13 10:24:00

Hi all.

Hope you feel better today snowflake sad take it easy.

crazykat sorry you're going through a tough time. I lost my dad this year from cancer and all I can say is spend as much time with your mum as you can, say what you need to and take lots of photos. I lost my mum last year from a stroke and didn't get the chance to do those things, and she hated having her photo taken so I don't even have loads of pictures of her. {{hugs}} to you.

t875 hope you're doing ok. We also saw despicable me 2 last week and loved it! Me and dh were rolled up laughing! (and dd's of course!)

Hope you're also ok mummylin and ssd

I ran my 10k race for life on Sunday with my friend. It was so hot! But we managed it in 1 hour 13 minutes which we were pleased with. I got a bit teary the night before when I was writing the sign for my back saying who I was running for but I was ok on the day, I was just glad to get to the finish line grin I raised £253 which I'm so pleased with.

Well I'm going to hang some more washing out now, loving this weather! Also looking forward to dd's breaking up for the holidays although I'm sure I'll have changed my mind after a few days!!! xxx

mummylin Tue 09-Jul-13 11:11:09

Wow * biscuits* very well done to you on your run. What a good amount you raised too . Would you do it again ? Hope all is going well for you. I too used to love the summer holidays, no getting up early , no uniform to iron etc.
* snowflakes* hope you are feeling a bit better this morning. It's too hot to be ill as well !
* ssd* hope you are doing ok. Not long till you go to cruse and hopefully they will help you.
chickydoo and * bigknickers* hope you are both taking each day as it comes and coping.
t875 hope you are finding work ok in this awful heat. I can't do anything , I am useless in this heat. My sister is here for two weeks but I haven't seen her or heard from her yet ! Been here since Saturday. None of us has. I expect they have been on the beach, I'm sure the little girls will love it to everyone else have a good day and I hope you are managing to put one foot in front of the other

BiscuitsandBaileys Tue 09-Jul-13 14:05:12

Hi mummylin yes I think I would do it again. There was such a good atmosphere, everyones there for the same reason. The only thing is I didn't like asking people to sponsor me as I know money is tight for so many at the moment but everyone has been so generous.
Hope you get to spend some time with your sister xx

mummylin Tue 09-Jul-13 15:30:16

You wouldn't even know she is here. No call, no text nothing ! Again well done to you. In the heat it was a fab achievement.

crazykat Tue 09-Jul-13 21:18:20

Well done biscuits I walked the 5k, there's no way I could have run it never mind 10k. I found it hard to ask for sponsorship as well but it's for a good cause which helped a bit.

The only good thing about knowing we don't have long left with my mum is that I've been able to tell her I love her and take photos as she doesn't like having her picture taken but she knows I'll need them when she's gone. It's one thing I regretted when my nan died suddenly just under two years ago, she also hated her photo taken (so do I, must run in our family). I don't really have many of her apart from a couple of her with my eldest three DCs and from when she was my age.

My mum seems more worried about my DCs, me and my dad and how we will cope than she seems to be about herself. She's asked me to make sure my dad's okay, she knows DH will take care of me. She's scared my DCs won't remember her but there's no way I'll let them forget. I do get sad that DS2 won't have any memories of her as he's only a baby and DD2 isn't yet 3 so she'll forget by the time she's older. In some ways it's good as they won't be hurt as much as DD1 and DS1 but at the same time it makes me unbearably sad at times.

crazykat Tue 09-Jul-13 21:19:02

Wow that's a bit of a rambling essay

crazykat Tue 09-Jul-13 21:19:48

Hope you're all holding up okay and enjoying the sun while it lasts.

mummylin Wed 10-Jul-13 10:01:43

Hello crazykat yours is such a sad story, I don't know how I would of coped with what you are going through. Your mum must be very positive in spite of her diagnosis and this is probably helping to keep her going. Brave lady. Like most mums I expect she will worry about everyone else rather than herself. If she can see that you and your dad will be there for each other it will help her I'm sure. How is your mum coping with this hot weather?
Good for you on doing that long walk. I don't even like walking to the shops !

mummylin Wed 10-Jul-13 10:17:26

Ps dragonfly pic on profile

BiscuitsandBaileys Wed 10-Jul-13 10:49:09

Great post there mummylin Love the dragonfly pic!

crazykat not a rambling essay at all, it's good to get it out and that's what we're here for smile It's good you've had the chance to take lots of photos. Look after yourself xx

crazykat Wed 10-Jul-13 20:09:25

Great pic.

Thanks it helps being able to talk about it, I'm not great at talking face to face about it without having a melt down.

My mum's finding the heat a bit tiring but for the first time in months she's not cold. It's been a bit cooler today which is a nice break from the heat but its due to warm up again towards the weekend.

How's everyone holding up?

likesnowflakesinanocean Wed 10-Jul-13 20:29:09

am glad you are getting to spend time with your mum crazykat, its so special this time. how are you all Kat,mummylin,SSD,t875,biscuits , vlad and anyone else! I'm sorry I have been rather useless posting am quite poorly so tucked in bed already.but can't get comfortable or settle due to stomach pains. been missing mum a lot and feeling down would give anything for a hug and some kind words all I seem to be getting is nagged lol.

mummylin Thu 11-Jul-13 14:09:53

Hi everyone. It's s much nicer day here today, not quite so hot.
I am thrilled because all my mums roses are coming out. At the last minute when we were clearing her house I decided I could not possibly leave her archway and roses behind, so after a struggle dh and my brother dismantled arch and dug up the roses. We planted and it just grew a little bit last year, now the archway is covered and all the roses are coming out, there are so many buds. Very happy. But my bean is still a lone one, so I have some more soaking and I'm going to plant them. this time I won't put them too far down. I have to grow them. But the single bean is growing very nicely grin
Hope you are feeling better snowflakes
Thinking of you all and hoping you are all ok. Hope work is ok t875
biscuits hope you are doing ok too"
crazykat hope your mum is enjoying a bit cooler weather today, I think was too hot to be comfortable earlier in the week.
chickydoo thinking of you, hope you are just taking each day as it comes.
Enjoy each day everyone x

mummylin Sat 13-Jul-13 10:02:54

Oh my god, a little sparrow has just flown in, it crashed into patio doors while trying to get out and was laying on its back. I tried to pick it up and it could not find the way out even though the doors are open, it then flew into my kitchen and I suspect it's now upstairs somewhere. I think it's alright and maybe it can fly out of the bedroom windows ! So this week have had. Stag beetle, big dragonfly and now a little bird ! Will have to go and see where it is but I don't actually like birds flying round my head ! Good job we don't have elephants here !

mummylin Sat 13-Jul-13 12:32:22

Sparrow out safe and sound ! Hope you are all enjoying this sunshine, it does lift your spirits dosent it. T anyone who is feeling down today, I hope things improve for you.

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