I lost my 2 hour old son back in Nov. I thought I was being strong, I thought I could cope, but in this last week I have crumbled. I don't know how to cope, if I can be bothered to try and cope or even if I want to. I can't stop crying, feel constantly sick to my stomach and every time I see a pregnant person or a new baby I feel anger, disappointment and jealousy.
I am seeking councilling through my GP but it's taking forever. I don't really know why I'm posting- just felt like writing it all down...
I have no personal experience, but i didn't want to read and run. I am so sorry for your loss.
There are many wonderful women on here who have been down your difficult path and will happily hold your hand, listen when you want to talk, listen when you just want to scream. I am sure some of them will be around soon.
Do you want to talk about your son? What was his name?
Oh my goodness. You poor thing. Of course you are struggling. Can your midwife help you access any services? Or even the health visitor? Have you been in touch with CRUSE? People on here rate them I think.
Keep posting- there are sadly many other mothers here who have lost babies. I am sure someone will be along soon who sadly has first hand experience of what you're going through.
Rosduk, you posted on our thread before. Do you want do come back? Of course you're not coping, none of us do really, at best we look like we're coping! And it's still really, really early days for you. It does get better as time goes on. I'll link to the new thread.
Thanks all. My little boy was called Thomas. We got the post mortum back and it looks like he died of a lack if oxygen but was perfect in every other way. We were expecting him to have had heart problems but at least it looks like it was a random event and not a problem with me.
I have a 20 month old daughter who is keeping me sane- I now appreciate her more and how much of a miracle children really are.
So sorry for your loss. You don't need to wait to see your GP for counselling. Depending on what borough you live in you can apply to bereavement counselling agencies direct. Please PM me, and I'll give you further advice. I'm a bereavement counsellor.
rosduk feeling as you do is normal. Not coping is normal. Sadly, it just hurts like nothing else. But do come and talk about Thomas on the thread that chip linked for you. It's a safe haven where others are walking the same road.