My friend just killed herself

(91 Posts)
BoffinMum Mon 28-Jan-13 23:27:41

I just found out this evening. Not sure what happened. She was lovely, I had no idea.

kissmyheathenass Mon 28-Jan-13 23:28:46

Oh no. So sorry. What terrible news.

ch1110 Mon 28-Jan-13 23:29:46

Oh sweetie bless you. I am absolutely sure there was nothing you could have done.
Hugs
Auntie Claire

seasalt Mon 28-Jan-13 23:29:58

Sorry to hear that, hope you are OK.

LaVitaBellissima Mon 28-Jan-13 23:31:05

So sorry for your loss Boffin sad

RandallPinkFloyd Mon 28-Jan-13 23:35:01

I'm so sorry boffin you must be so shocked.

BoffinMum Tue 29-Jan-13 00:14:31

I am quite upset. She got rapid, massive depression.

BoffinMum Tue 29-Jan-13 00:16:03

Shit evening. Au pair walked out too, then son cut his leg and blood everywhere. Waiting for plague and pestilence next.

So shocked about friend.

BoffinMum Tue 29-Jan-13 00:16:47

Can't go to funeral.

Screaminabdabs Tue 29-Jan-13 00:19:08

I'm so sorry, Boff - hope you can find as much RL support as you need. Shock and grief are a potent mixture. There's a book called "The Courage to Grieve" which I'd recommend getting hold of when you've moved through the initial shock phase. thanks

BoffinMum Tue 29-Jan-13 00:19:37

Going to put my Paul McKenna sleep app on and try not to think about it.

Screaminabdabs Tue 29-Jan-13 00:20:35

Good idea - hope you get some rest.

BoffinMum Tue 29-Jan-13 00:21:22

Another friend came over until DH got home. Everyone is being nice. DS1 did bedtimes and is doing after school stuff tomorrow.

Screaminabdabs Tue 29-Jan-13 00:22:45

I'm glad you've got people looking after you.

Screaminabdabs Tue 29-Jan-13 00:26:09

The night-time crowd on MN are always good for support, if you need them in the early hours.

duchesse Tue 29-Jan-13 00:27:37

That's awful. sad What a terrible shock. Look after yourself.

Bad things seem to group like buses. Can you get an emergency au pair?

RandallPinkFloyd Tue 29-Jan-13 00:47:29

Lean on your friends and your family, they love you and will want to be there for you. Do try and get some sleep.

BoffinMum Tue 29-Jan-13 09:09:49

Slept quite well for about 6 hours thanks to McKenna app. People rallying around and I am so glad I have so many terrific friends. Have emailed my friend's son at Uni and offered him unconditional support.

How on earth can a lovely woman fall so far, so fast?????? I was the one with depression, not her! Or maybe I had treatment in time and she didn't ....

BoffinMum Tue 29-Jan-13 09:14:27

Shit, am crying on train, mascara everywhere. Shit shit shit.

Portofino Tue 29-Jan-13 09:17:52

Oh Boffin - how terrible! It must have been a horrible shock! (((hugs)))

lougle Tue 29-Jan-13 09:18:56

Boffin, so sorry.

nilbyname Tue 29-Jan-13 09:21:15

That is so so sad, how horrible for you and for your friends family.

Please lean on people and talk talk talk.

baby wipes are brill at rescuing make-up disasters.

SanityClause Tue 29-Jan-13 09:25:45

Bloody hell, Boffin, that's so hard.

A close friend of mine killed himself when we were in our early 20s. I remember saying to my DM, didn't he know how much we loved him? And she said, that that would make no difference, if he didn't love himself enough.

It somehow makes it harder and easier at the same time to accept there was nothing you could do. sad

Here's some thanks and a brew for you.

BoffinMum Tue 29-Jan-13 09:34:29

Will go into Boots at Kings X and get wipes when I get there. Good tip that. Love MN for that sort of thing.

I feel disorientated, not guilty. But I wish mental health treatment was a higher priority. I get fantastic care and consequently I've become very resilient. But that's because my friend is my GP. It shouldn't matter who is looking after you, and there should be faster acting, less toxic drugs.

BoffinMum Tue 29-Jan-13 09:37:08

Second friend to do this, btw. Feels like ruddy suicide epidemic. Life expectancy in my friendship group plummeting. Senseless waste.

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