Wording on a headstone

(8 Posts)
NorthernLass1967 Wed 12-Dec-12 20:43:34

Hi everyone.
My mum died back in July and we are getting round to having the headstone redone. She is buried with her mum and dad and my dad.
I want to somehow recognise that she had a brother that was born and died on the same day, back in 1932. She knew he existed but she thought he was much older than her (she had another brother, 11 years older than her) in fact he was only a year older than her. I got a copy of the death certificate so we know the little one's date of birth.
My mum was sorry that there was nowhere to go to remember her lost brother, so I thought that, as she is buried with her own mum and dad, that their headstone would be the ideal place (the only place) to remember he existed.
The only trouble is, I don't know how or what to put on the headstone.
We dont know where the baby was buried, but can you mention someone on a headstone that is not buried there? Is it right to put "also in memory of X"?
Help!
Northern Lass.

i should think that you could, or something along the lines of " with fond memories of x " then you are acknowledging your mums brother and parents loss too. difficult one but im sure you would be able to include something along those lines

chipmonkey Wed 12-Dec-12 23:48:59

Northern, in the cemetery dd is buried in, I have noticed a couple of headstones with the person's name on but underneath
And also her brother X, buried in Glasnevin Cemetery ( Glasnevin is miles from us)
Another thing I have seen people do is to place another little stone in front of the main one a bit like these hearts here if you scroll done to the picture on the right on the third row, with another name on them.

But it might depend on the cemetery and whether they allow you to put things in front of the headstone.

motherstongue Thu 27-Dec-12 16:31:00

I may be too late to give you some advice but I work for an undertaker and I arrange memorials for families. In my experience you do not need to be in the lair to have your name on the stone, also you do not have to say where the person is actually buried if you do name them on the stone and they are not in that particular lair. If you want some help with the wording feel free to pm me, however, a good memorial mason should be able to give you all the advice you need.

BCBG Thu 27-Dec-12 22:00:35

I think that is a lovely thought, as well as important to future generations! How about a line underneath along the lines of:

^^also in memory of x, born sleeping on x, or born x, died x. Rest In Peace.

It can be in memory of someone not buried in the plot, and of course so often the little babies had no recorded plot so it is a lovely thing to do in remembrance.

meditrina Thu 27-Dec-12 22:04:37

I saw a stone which included the line: also 'In memory of XX (dates) who lies elsewhere'. Could you adapt that as an inscription below that honouring your DM?

greencolorpack Thu 27-Dec-12 22:06:21

"Sacred to the memory of x.". Saw that on a lot of old gravestones the other day in a small town.

NorthernLass1967 Fri 18-Jan-13 21:31:50

Thanks everyone for your kind replies.
It seems the decision has been taken out of our hands as the f'in priest won't let us put just the extra name and dob anywhere on the gravestone.
I have decided to put my uncle's name in the Book of Rememberance at the Crem instead. Sod the priest. He will be remembered somewhere.
Northern Lass.

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