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Find bereavement help and support from other Mumsnetters.

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Find bereavement help and support from other Mumsnetters.

Bereavement

Holby City just saved a 23 week prem

27 replies

slinksanta · 29/11/2005 21:16

why couldn't anyone help my 23 week baby, i feel so angry and cheated. how come some places help babies this young when others don't.
does anyone know of any hospitals in the uk that does resusitate babies from 23 weeks? i am pg again and so sure the same thing is going to happen.

OP posts:

Report

MABS · 29/11/2005 21:19

Brighton SCBU does

Roobietherednosedreindeer · 29/11/2005 21:20

Sorry about your baby slinksanta - hope you are getting all the support you need. I am fortunate not to have experienced the death of baby but think I can kind of understand your anger...

paolosgirl · 29/11/2005 21:22

I don't know too much about it, but think this is why they are looking into lowering the gestation limit from 24 weeks.

I can't even begin to imagine how awful it must have been for you . Hugs and prayers to you for this pregnancy....Are you getting a lot of good support?

paolosgirl · 29/11/2005 21:22

Gest. limit for a termination, I mean

starlover · 29/11/2005 21:22

slinksanta... please don't take this the wrong way... but iyt is jsut a tv show!!!
it isn't real life

i am so sorry to hear about your baby

daisy1999 · 29/11/2005 21:24

You must feel so angry. Wishing you all the best for this pregnancy

misdee · 29/11/2005 21:34

holby city makes me angry. they get so much wrong. particually heart patients

i'm sorry about your baby.

BudaBabe · 29/11/2005 21:37

Oh Slinksanta - you poor thing. There HAVE been cases of babies being saved at 22 weeks. BUT - the problems for these babies and parents are really still not known. It really depends on each case as far as I know.

Presumably your doc know your history. Their priority will be to keep baby inside you for as long as poss.

Will be thinking of you.

slinksanta · 29/11/2005 21:44

Thanks guys -im sorry i was just feeling sorry for myself, i really shouldn't watch holby city, it doesn't take much to make me feel depressed atm
my baby probably wouldn't have survived anyway.

OP posts:

Marina · 29/11/2005 21:46

I don't watch it anymore either slinksanta - too close to home, but totally WRONG half the time as Misdee says. Birth trauma and cardiology emergencies served up as entertainment, yuk.
I am so sorry this stupid programme has upset you tonight

starlover · 29/11/2005 21:46

just remember... things on tv are arbitrary.. they're down to the scriptwriter and he decides who gets to live and die!

i had a miscarriage before i got pg with ds and i was so scared that it would happen again... but it didn't! and I am sure that your baby will be fine too...

Flossam · 29/11/2005 21:48

its my word of the night, but holby is Crap, crap crap. You should hear some of the things relatives say, and you just know they've heard it off holby. And it's always completely irrelevent.

misdee · 29/11/2005 21:48

apparently there was an episode last week/week before, where they called 2 people in and they had decide who got the heart. load of bollocks. what makes me angry is tyhe scriptwrites work with the team at harefield for information.

ignore the programme in future. its not very good.

dingdongmeggymooonhigh · 29/11/2005 21:58

Um, sorry you got upset about tonights show. My friend writes for the show, in the defence of the writers they try to get details as correct as possible and have specialists and consultants who they work with, unfortunately it's often producers who want to sex up storylines which often makes the stories a bit far fetched. My midwives all used to send messages through me to my friend to get his act together and to stop writing such nonsence

He is always moaning about it.

Flossam · 29/11/2005 22:34

For me its all the chiche's that get on my nerves and the lines around the stories rather than the actual medical scientific stuff. Watched it ealier and can't help but feel smug when whats her face Owen wife didn't know what the medical equipment was used for (Diane isn't it) and I did!!!

jambuttie · 29/11/2005 22:59

slinksanta sending you big hugs

I had my twins at 29 weeks and ds1 at 37. I laboured both pg at 20 weeks and was also told that i needed to get to 24 weeks before they could attempt to resusitate my babies. Thankfully I did hold on that few more weeks but also understand your pain. I lost a child at 17.5 weeks too

RTKangaMummy · 29/11/2005 23:44

UCH LONDON does 23 weekers

sorry about your baby

sparklymieow · 29/11/2005 23:49

IIRC a hospital in cambridge helps under 24 weekers, when DD2 was in SCBU, there was a baby in there who had been transferred back from cambridge and I think she was born at 23 weeks.

sparklymieow · 29/11/2005 23:49

sorry about your baby too

zippy539 · 30/11/2005 00:00

Slinksanta - I'm so, so sorry for your loss. It doesn't bear thinking about and my heart goes out to you, and your baby.

I wanted to echo what others have said about Holby City. It's a tv programme - storylined, written, edited, and produced by people who generally don't have a clue and who need to make a piece of drama which will grip the 'general' public. All too often, the reality is very, very different from what we see portrayed on the TV. I know this because I work in TV drama and while none of my collegues would like to think that they are hurting anyone, it is also the case that programmes are driven by the need to achieve both ratings and an 'emotional response' from the audience.

I am so sorry that the programme has effected you in this way. Maybe you should write to the producer and say how much it has upset you. It might make him/her aware that these issues cut very deep. Your response might well make them tread more carefully in future.

majormoo · 30/11/2005 09:24

Holby City has terrified me recently as well. There was a storyline where Chrissie needed more treatment after a dodgy smear result and was concerned she could not have children, which sent me into a blind panic as I was waiting for my own follow up results 6 months after treatment. I emailed a question to a consultant through a charity that supports people with cervical cancer/pre-cancer, and the reply basically said they often have problems where soap operas alarm people and gave me very reassuring advice. I suppose they have to make the story lines dramatic or we wouldn't watch.

I did think of you while I was watching it as I'm aware of your story from here. I really hope everything works out for you this time.

milward · 30/11/2005 09:28

sorry to hear what happened - wishing you all the best with your pg xxx

Fireworks · 30/11/2005 09:38

slinksanta, I am so sorry this programme has upset you. I stopped watching all hospital dramas when pregnant because they upset me so much too and had horrendous bad dreams.
I hope you have plenty of people in rl to talk through your concerns about your pregnancy and that it is all going smoothly

Lonelymum · 30/11/2005 09:40

I am the daughter of doctors and can I reassure everyone (and confirm what Misdee has said) that real life doctors have very little respect for dramas such as Holby City which get medical details wrong at every turn. It is a fantasy world! Please don't watch it and think these things could/should happen to you!

mygarland · 30/11/2005 14:57

hi slinkstah, it's mygirl from ttc aftre mc thread, just saw this. Yeah remember it's a tv show and it's upto the scriptwriters what happens even if that stuff doesn't happen in rl.
from now on i expect to c u on these boards at 8m on a tue so i know u're not watching it!

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