Toddler logic - don't you just love it?

(79 Posts)
PerchanceToDream Thu 06-Dec-12 21:54:19

Had such a stressful morning with 21mo DD today until she had me in stitches...

Usually when I give her a satsuma I hold each segment up to the light to check for pips and she takes them one by one. Today she started copying me, holding up her satsuma segments one by one over her head and laughing hysterically. She has absolutely no idea why you have to hold a satsuma segment above your head before you eat it but apparently it's very funny!

Haha brilliant!! They do do.some odd things dont they.

Teaching dd animal sounds atm and she will not grasp that cats do.not say "Hiya".

PerchanceToDream Thu 06-Dec-12 21:59:13

Oh that's just too cute!

NiceOneCenturion Thu 06-Dec-12 22:11:09

That's so cute.

And yes, hiya is more of a dog expression I think grin

I was walking in the park with my ds when someone went past on a bike, and he pointed and said bike. I said yes, or it' s called a bicycle.

"Bye castle, bye castle" he said a few times.Then he stopped walking, thought for a minute looking very serious, and exclaimed "bouncy castle!".

DeWe Thu 06-Dec-12 22:12:09


Not sure it's just toddler logic though. One time my dm was buying eggs. She opened the box to check they were all whole and not cracked they way you do. Next to her this elderly gentleman did the same. As she closed the box he leant over and whispered to her "What are we looking for?" grin

PerchanceToDream Thu 06-Dec-12 22:20:27

Hehe! Yesterday I asked DD to put her jeans in the 'bin' (meaning laundry basket). She looks in and goes, "what's in here? Rubbish jeans, rubbish towel, rubbish socks..."

happygilmore Thu 06-Dec-12 22:23:35

My DD has seen me sniff a couple of items of clothing that have arrived through the post from ebay (sounds a bit rank written down but you know what I mean!). She now sniffs all of the items of post that come through the door.

kirrinIsland Thu 06-Dec-12 22:24:56

DD1 is still convinced I can't see her if she can't see me. She loves "hiding" by covering her eyes with her hands. I love it!

Dd and i were making shapes with playdough recently, i made a cube and Dd announced "oh, a barbecube".

No amount of persuading would convince her that that's not what they are called.

DD's pyjamas come in those packs where you have the same tops and bottoms, but you can mix and match them, so she has always had the red top with patterned bottoms and vice versa.

Last night she had a leaky nappy, so I gave her clean bottoms tonight. She gave me The Look, and said "silly mommy, you got two the same" and wouldn't get dressed for 10 minutes. Couldn't get her head round the fact that you can wear any combination of PJs.

She also looks out of the window at night to see the moon and on Tuesday said "loooook! There's my moooon! Where's Ooma's moon gone?" She obviously thinks that there's a different moon at different houses... MIL only lives 20 mins away!

She also thinks that sharks go ner ner, ner ner, a la jaws this is dh's fault

DS announces the plane in the night sky was banging. He didn't know the word for flashing. Love the logic of just applying a word that has something happen intermittently

Amazing really ( am I mummy over thinking this??)

StickEmWithThePointyEnd Thu 06-Dec-12 22:35:05

Ds 2.4 cannot grasp that the sun is the sun and not the moon. In his head it makes sense I suppose... they're both in the sky and both shine, I can't even use the argument that you see the moon at night and the sun in the day because we could clearly see both in the middle of the day yesterday. hmm

I haven't even begun to think how I'll introduce the concept of planets yet. They're the moon too at the moment.

runawaysimba Thu 06-Dec-12 22:52:24

2tired same with my DD! She also thinks penguins say "dodo do do do", thanks to Pingu. And, nothing to do with logic, but has me in stitches every time: I'm teaching her to say "thank you", as opposed to "ta", and she's struggling with her th sounds. So every time I give her something, she says in her very sweetest voice, "Fuck you, Mummy!"

PerchanceToDream Thu 06-Dec-12 22:54:39

These are all brilliant! No, shattered I think it's amazing too when you really listen to them, break it down and realise the chain of thought that's gone into their little musings.

ImperialSantaKnickers Thu 06-Dec-12 22:55:53

{fgrin] runawaysimba

ImperialSantaKnickers Thu 06-Dec-12 22:56:33

Ooops Smiley fail!

NiceOneCenturion Thu 06-Dec-12 23:03:55

ha ha 2tired my dh tried to teach ds the Jaws theme until I gleefully pointed out he was actually humming the tune from the pink panther. It substantially reduced the sense of threat.

Unlurked Thu 06-Dec-12 23:04:30

runaway we have Wank You Mummy in our house instead. Delightful!

Dd1 seemed to have missed 'speaking' from her vocabulary for quite done time, so if I was telling her something and she wanted me to stfu she would say 'stop noise-ing mummy' or if I said something and she wanted me to repeat myself she would say 'sing that again please'. I loved her little substitutes smile she doesn't use them anymore sad

They really are like little sponges arent they.

When I take dd to dms they have a see through biscuit barrel with a suction lid. dd crawls towards it nd rolls it around a bit then turns of us and says "yum yum...ta" over and over.

Oh and DS cracks me up with this daily
I ask a question such as do you want some grapes or not? He answers 'or not'

runawaysimba Fri 07-Dec-12 07:02:44

Hehehe "or not" grin
Just got a new one tonight: DP was getting DD into her pyjamas and was counting the buttons. "One button, two buttons, three buttons, four buttons - what comes after four?" DD replies: "button!"

We3bunniesOfOrientAre Fri 07-Dec-12 07:06:42

At ds's preschool they have a 'post box' so they can put cards in for their friends. It is a big round container, with wrapping paper around the outside and lots of cotton wool balls stuck on top, with a slot at the top for the letters.

It snowed on the way to preschool, but when I picked him up I told him that the snow had all gone. 'I know' he said wisely 'the snow has all gone in that bin'

poppy283 Fri 07-Dec-12 07:20:59


We went to the Isle of Wight recently, and Dd loves to tell us 'it's not Isle of Wight, it's Isle of blue, Isle of yellow, isle of red!'

And if she brushes past things, she says 'sorry bin' etc, but if she's hurt she also says 'i'm so sorry'

DeckTheHallsWithBoughsOfJolly Fri 07-Dec-12 07:30:02

DS and I were having a difficult day the other day until he picked up a bit of pizza, held it on his nose and said 'bird'.

herbaceous Fri 07-Dec-12 14:46:54

DS said the other day:
'There are girls and there are boys, aren't there mummy.'
'Yes, that's right.'
'And I'm a girl.'
'Really? What makes you say that?'
'Well, George is a boy, but he's a baby. And Peppa's a girl, and isn't a baby. So I must be a girl.'

grin runawaysimba

colditz Fri 07-Dec-12 20:15:46

Ds2 was leafing through an alphabet book a few years ago, and I pointed out to him that Ball starts with 'b' sound. What sound does Apple start with?

He paused for thought.

"Crunch!" He replied, confidently.

PerchanceToDream Sat 08-Dec-12 22:58:21

On the bus the other day, DD started stroking my knees (!), deep in thought. "Christmas knees", she says.

PessimisticMissPiggy Sat 08-Dec-12 23:07:30

My DD blows on radiators grin

justalilmummy Sat 08-Dec-12 23:10:31

My ds on realising it had gone dark outside 'its dark outside isn't it mummy, did daddy turn the light off' and watching daddy swimming in the sea in the summer hes dad went under water 'daddy's looking for the plug'

My son says "no problem <name>" when you thank him.

He has the logic that if he sits in the cupboard with the glass doors and shuts his self in I can't see him.

DeckTheHallsWithBoughsOfJolly Sat 08-Dec-12 23:19:47

Ds saw a nativity book today with shepherds gathered round a fire watching the angel. He pointed at the fire and said "nee naw"

beanandspud Sat 08-Dec-12 23:49:09

These are lovely.

I remember when DS was about 2 we had to pick up a friend from a hotel. A random guy was sitting at a table in the reception area with a candle on it, reading the paper. DS took one look at the candle and announced (very loudly) "Look, 'tis man's birthday!".

mammyof5 Sun 09-Dec-12 00:09:42

one of the things my daughter said when she was little was bless you me whenever she sneezed.

i missed it so much when she dropped the me of the end it always brought a smile to my face even on the toughest days.

Pandemoniaa Sun 09-Dec-12 00:51:26

dgd is 23.5 months old and, like her father (ds2) when he was her age, she has a habit of coming out with surprisingly adult sentences. On the way home from a trip out last week she was entertaining us with her current favourite words and I said "You can say nearly every word now can't you?" to which she replied "More or less, Nanny, more or less".

Welovecouscous Sun 09-Dec-12 00:58:46

My son, 16 months says miaou miaou if you ask 'would you like a piece of carrot?'

he is slightly confused between carrot and cat grin

DPotter Sun 09-Dec-12 01:41:31

my dd was about 3.5 & we were walking thru our local cemetry; she asked why some of the headstone were smaller. I explained they for for people who had been cremated -'what's cremated mean ?' says dd. so I answered it's when someone's body is burnt when they die. pause from dd and then 'don't they go ouch?'. still makes me giggle

These are brilliant. My DH is from South London and as a result, even at 34, he still says "Bruv" a lot when talking to friends. A friend popped in yesterday while DD (very nearly two) was having her dinner and she looked at him, smiled and said "Alwite bwuv!"

AlreadyScone Sun 09-Dec-12 09:17:14

DS has just come through a nasty cough that had been keeping him (and me!) awake at night. First I would hear the coughing from his room, and then a cross, sleepy little voice complaining "Be quiet, cough, it's too noisy!"

Last year we were using the Christmas tree to learn new words, "bird, star, present, angel" etc. He really went for this and would reel off lists: "Star, heart, tree, DON'T TOUCH IT, present, angel, DON'T TOUCH IT, horse, bird, DON'T TOUCH IT..."

Eventually realised a DON'T TOUCH IT was a bauble grin

justalilmummy Sun 09-Dec-12 10:41:36

That's so funny alreadyscone when ds was learning to talk I somehow managed to teach him a light was called 'what's that'

OstrichSizedToLapland Sun 09-Dec-12 10:57:57

DD often tells DH he cannot go to work because it's dark outside. He's tempted to listen to her.

MoaningMingeWhimpersAgain Sun 09-Dec-12 11:03:10

grin AlreadyScone My eyes are watering

PerchanceToDream Sun 09-Dec-12 18:42:19

DD makes sure everything's "upside up".

jaggythistle Fri 14-Dec-12 15:59:52

DS1 (3.2) uses upside down and 'straight way up' for some reason. smile

beela Fri 14-Dec-12 19:28:31

Pandemoniaa my DS (26mo) said something similar - he used a word I didn't expect him to know and I said to him 'you know all the words now don't you DS?' and he replied with 'I hope so Mummy'!

He is currently getting a bit confused about the festive season, crisps are now called christmases, and we are waiting for 'Farmer Christmas' to come with all the presents.

grin at DON'T TOUCH IT, our tree is going up tomorrow and I can see that happening here!

beela Fri 14-Dec-12 19:31:10

Oh, and DS is another one who thinks we can't see him if he closes his eyes (actually our fault for going 'where's DS?' when he puts his hands over his face), so if we tell him off he just carries on doing whatever it was (e.g. banging spoon on table) but with his eyes shut!

supadupapupascupa Fri 14-Dec-12 19:39:51

we've got farmer pwistmas coming too smile. Also if DS (3) doesn't want to do something he says 'i wouldn't' instead of 'i won't' which makes me smile. Fizzy drinks always get referred to as bubbles too smile

supadupapupascupa Fri 14-Dec-12 19:41:14

one funny episode we had involved DS reeling off all the females he knew saying they were girls and they didn't have a willy. Then he said I will buy you and gran a willy. I asked where from and he said 'the doctors house' Dead serious! really funny.

cornflowers Fri 14-Dec-12 22:07:06

We were driving home this afternoon and passed a no left turn sign. Dd pointed and said, "Look mummy, it says no throwing boomerangs."

Love these!

We were out for a walk and came across a very ancient cat, a fluffy with huge eyes and a flat nose number. When moving on, DD2 called out "Bye bye owl".

EMS23 Sat 15-Dec-12 08:10:00

DSS, when he was about 4 sung "It's the Mickey Mouse Crack house". Still makes me laugh 5 years later!

wonderstuff Sat 15-Dec-12 09:51:34

DD, 5, so hardly a toddler, got dressed this morning in a tutu and a cardigan.
'don't you think a vest and t-shirt will be a good idea?'
'No I'm going to wear my santa hat'

ShoeJunkie Sat 15-Dec-12 10:23:29

My DNiece using to refer to having photos taken as 'cheesing' as we always said 'cheese' just before.

CindySherman Sat 15-Dec-12 10:49:37

Aw these are great. DD used to look at her little trike with a face on it and say " you're not talking today are you? " she did this for ages! She must have figured out at some point it wasn't going to...

I'll be so sad when dd stops saying lellow. She also gets confused between bike and bicycle, so she just calls them bikles. We love asking her to say yellow bicycle. "Lellow bikle" aaaw! smile

Offred Sat 15-Dec-12 11:49:02

I love how my comedian twin1 who is three picks up catchphrases; "oh me lord!" "'S gone wrong gromit!" Also how he can't say hungry but instead says "funky" - "oh mummy moo, me am reeeeeaaaaaaaallllllyyyyy funky though...."

OscarPistoriusBitontheside Sat 15-Dec-12 11:50:56

Ds1 used to still does refer to hotels as home-tels and it was always farmer Christmas here too! Which makes me grin because I grew up on a farm.

Ds2 is 2yo so confusion reigns at the moment. He refers to all liquid as "juice". So if he sees a boat for instance it's a "boash a juice". He can't say th or t yet. smile

CindySherman Sat 15-Dec-12 18:03:08

It will always be a jumpoline in this house now....

PerchanceToDream Sun 16-Dec-12 11:30:03

Ah these are all so lovely.

I've just remembered another one: When DD wants to watch TV she holds the two remote controls up to the telly and asks for "Beebies". That's very logical, of course as we thought she was just calling CBeebies, "Beebies" until the other day I caught her counting the remote controls: "One beebie, two beebies."

SusieSausages Mon 17-Dec-12 21:29:13

grin at DON'T TOUCH IT!

Offred Mon 17-Dec-12 22:06:28

Oh and comedy dt is having a phase of affectionately calling people "egg".

beela Mon 17-Dec-12 22:11:59

DS(2.2) used to call it a jumpoline too, I think it's a great word. However, I used it the other day and he looked at me very seriously and said 'trampoline, mummy'.

I stand corrected grin

gemma4d Mon 17-Dec-12 22:21:11

DD1 (just 5) is learning Adding Up and Adding Down at school (ie subtraction). And she insists on singing "jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way, oh what fun to kiss your eyes...." - she just won't believe its not that hmm

EverybodysSnowyEyed Mon 17-Dec-12 22:32:55

I was making a cup of tea earlier and DD (2) said 'when i'm a mummy I drink tea to'. when ds doesn something she can't/isn't allowed she says 'I do that when I'm a boy'

When the kids race up to the front door DS will say 'I won' and she will say 'me two' which leads to great arguments as they talk at complete cross purposes with DS insisting that he won fair and square and her insisting she was indeed two!

And then the xmas one

'we wish you a mewwy cwissmas and a happy new Beard'

I was telling DD1 3.10 about our plans over xmas and got to Boxing day. She looks at me and says "Boxing day? Whys it called Boxing day?" I vaguely know but hadnt a clue how to explain so I just said I wasnt sure.

A minute later she says "people are so silly punching each other!" grin

Helmondo Tue 18-Dec-12 11:07:53

Wetting myself here at "happy new beard" (fgrin) they're all just so cute!

Helmondo Tue 18-Dec-12 11:08:44

FFS smiley fail grin

cocoachannel Tue 18-Dec-12 17:56:48

DD is another one who at 22 months struggles to differentiate between liquids. In her case everything is 'water'. I spent a Saturday morning recently with cups containing water, juice and milk. She seemed to have grasped the difference, we moved on to other things and later went to the 2nd birthday party of a friend's DS. On entering the room DD went round noting every child's 'juice' and all the adults' glasses of 'water' which were in fact Champagne. I now have regular jibes about 'Mummy's special water' from my friend wine

thegreylady Tue 18-Dec-12 21:22:59

I am rather deaf and often have trouble with what dgc say unless I am wearing my hearing aid.I reported to dd something dgs[aged5] had said and he piped up;"Grandma misunderheard again Mummy"!

ewaczarlie Tue 18-Dec-12 21:46:01

These are so great I can't stop laughing to write some of my DS pearls grin

TurkeyDino Tue 18-Dec-12 21:57:23

We have bounceline instead of trampoline (but only at gym his home trampoline is called the 'jump jump').

I used to always try to do something fun with DS1 on my day off and one evening I asked what he would like to do tomorrow and he replied 'a poo' grin

chocolatetester1 Tue 18-Dec-12 22:18:43

'I'm sitting on a spoon mummy.'
So said ds1 at breakfast.
I checked. And checked again.
'Only joking mummy!'

I didn't think they were able to lie until later on!

Charltonangel Wed 19-Dec-12 07:13:47

Last night I heard dh say to dd(17mo) don't hit daddy. Do you want a smack?" To which dd replied "snack? Please..."

Penguin is mummin, which I find unbearably cute...


PerchanceToDream Wed 19-Dec-12 07:24:03

DD when I was changing her nappy yesterday: Mummy, I got a hole in my botty! shock

BikeRunSki Wed 19-Dec-12 07:40:17

DS (2 at the time) thinks we go to work to givecus something to do when he is at nursery.

Charltonangel Wed 19-Dec-12 08:24:00

Oh and my Godson at 2 had trouble pronouncing "stairs". The fun we had - "where's mummy gone?" "Oh she up arse" grin

BrusselSproutsFartyPants Wed 19-Dec-12 14:22:34

If you say to DD2(4) something like "DD2, you aren't going to be naughty at daddy's are you?" She says "I willn't"

She also still calls peanut butter keynut butter for some reason even though she can say it properly.

DD3(2) is an annoying back seat driver, she is always telling me I'm going the wrong way!

matana Wed 19-Dec-12 15:15:06

I asked my 2 yo DS what he wanted for dinner recently and he replied: "Pudding." It had me in stitches but he just looked bemused like "And??"

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