two year old tantrums

[lozzawoo]

My little boy has really bad tantrums and everybody says its the terrible two stage but it is more than that. He can mess the house up for 10 children, throw things, doesnt go shopping just screams etc.. any advice?

[Chandra]

Two books: Raising Boys and The Secret of HAppy CHildren (both by Steve Biddulph).

The naughty step has worked wonders for DS, but you need to be consistent. If the tantrum is in public I try to ignore him (while feeling everyone on Earth is thinking I'm the worst mother in the world), I try to relax (yes, it's possible) before saying "NO". I never scream to him, actually if I lower my voice he's likely to stop screaming because he can't hear me.

When doing the shopping... if he starts crying he wants to get out of the trolley, I give him a hug and say "I love you very much but we don't wander around supermarkets, do we?" after 15 times he gets so bored that stops trying.

However, the little one has a radar to identify the situations where I'm going to be so embarrased that I would give in.

Hope it helps. I'm sure more people will show up soon with more tips.