DS 3.7 yrs has become scared of birthday parties (well busy places with lots of kids)

[Chooster]

Ds has always been a little shy when he's in a big group and I can tell from his behaviour that he feels a little out of his depth. But he can be very confident on a 1 to 1 level with his friends / adults and is usually fine at nursery. But recently he's become upset at noisy busy events with lots of kids. He started crying and getting upset at a Christmas magic show where there were loads of kids screaming and excited and its got a lot worse since a 4th birthday party at the start of January when we went to a busy soft play place. I also had my 6 month old DS2 so had to find a quiet place to feed him and DS1 was practically hysterical as he couldn't see me and was surrounded by about 20 kids and their parents. The lastest was this weekend when he was at a community centre for another birthday and there were about 50 kids there (it was a joint party). He wouldn't let go of me the whole time and was asking when we were going home.

I know this is not a major problem and probably just a phase but I want to do whatever it takes to build his confidence and stop this becoming a bigger issue. I haven't been pushing him but do I now avoid these kind of events for a while?? Could it also be a delayed reaction to DS2 arrival?

Any thoughts would be appreociated...

[Twiglett]

yes avoid

[pointydog]

Get the book 'Patrick the Party Hater' by Emily SMith. It's ace

[kbaby]

My DD is similar as was her dad(acording to mil) she hates going to places where she is not familiar with the people or the place.

All I do is take her but then stay with her and try and encourage her to join in, if she wont I just let her stay with me. Normally 20 mins before the end she joins in and I then have to drag her out to leave. I think they are just intimidated by so many people and will eventually grow out of it. DS by contrast just bowls in and gets on with it, I have noticed that she gains confidence from him by following him about and bossing him about so it could be as your LO gets older your ds2 gains confidence because theres someone familiar there that is joining in