Is there any thing im missing, please have a look and tell me what you think or what you would do differently.

[donbean]

Ds 4.6 started full time school last Sept.
Unfortunately his behaviour has been an issue since he was a tiny tot.I have found it difficult allot of the time.
So he started school and after a week or two of bieng a "whirlwind" (teachers description), he settled in lovely.
Apparently both my son and his teacher tell me that he is having to be reprimanded for persistant naughty behaviour since returning to school after Christmas hols.
so, i am not comfortable with punishing him at home for whatever has gone on at school.
I asked teacher, should i be worried and what can we do at home to help this situation?
She said to just talk with him.
Me and my boy had a chat last night and we have decided that the paln should be that he will try his very best to be well mannered and well behaved.
I will check every day with teacher on his behaviour.
in the mean time, after school treats are stopped.(sweet treats)
i have put up a sticker chart on the fridge.
i have written his name onto it and said that every day he has been good he can put a sticker over one letter of his name. When all 5 are covered we will get out his bike and go to the park for a right good razz, ds is happy with this.
Nothing has changed at home since Xmas, we are a happy family home with no worries.
What do you think i am missing with him and what would you do differently?
I am worried about him.

[funnypeculiar]

Does he understand clearly what is meant by 'good behaviour'? Perhaps his goals ned to be more tangible/definite (& also, therefore achievable)
I'm not sure I could be 'well mannered & well behaved' all day

[MamaGloriousSunshine]

i think you're doing the right thing

DD went through a terror stage at school and once she saw that home and school worked togehter adn taht DH or I would speak to teacher EVERY DAY, she settled down very quikcly

best of l uck

[Babyblue2]

I'd probably do the same as you, unless there is something he'd prefer more than go to the park. If it were me I'd probably put money into the equation so that at the end of the week he could go and buy a comic or some sweets, or save it if he prefers. Not a silly amount of money, 20p per day or something and reinforce good behaviour at home with stickers. Its hard, I have a minxy DD2 (2.10) who although is calming down quite a bit, has been quite a handful.

[donbean]

Its funny you should say that funnypeculiar because dh and me were talking about this.
The things he has been doing is saying to teacher "im bored", "im not doing that, im too little to do that"
Now this isnt disasterous to me (is it to you?)
But the principle is that he is talking to a grown up like that, does that mean a lack of respect or that he feels so comfortable with his teacher now that he feels able to say things like that.
As for "im not doing that, im too small" i have no idea where that has come from because in our house you try every thing at least once and we never say, cant/wont.
Prized bike has been in garage all winter so to go out on it is indead a huge reward for him.

[Babyblue2]

Ah, well good luck to you, you're doing the right thing although I didn't realise his bad behaviour was talking to his teacher. I thought it was PROPER bad behaviour.

[donbean]

No its other things as well, im told that he wont follow instruction and just laughs if she asks him to do some thing.

He is not following instruction at home, i have to ask him 7 times to do some thing, i though that this was just an aged 4/5 type thing, common and not unusual behaviour.
sigh,
i want him to be good, dont want him to be known as the naughty kid, but wonder if expectations are too high.
think its a phase type thing.

[Babyblue2]

I have 4.10 yr old, she's generally good. I have the rule that I will ask once, if she doesn't do it, I ask her once more and if she hasn't made a move by the time i've counted to 5, she goes to sit on the naughty seat. Used this with DD2 (2.10) and this dramatically improved her behaviour.

[donbean]

So it is just a 4year old thing isnt it!
He is just so distracted and busy to get his shoes on in the morning!
Any way can usually get him to do things without shouting so thats good i suppose.
Teachers make you feel like your kid is a moron and jail fodder!
She is actually lovely. Reminds me of miss honey from Matilda type, very nice but quite strict at the same time.

[donbean]

im dreading picking him up, hope she says he has been better today.

[Babyblue2]

Oh well good luck. Hope you manage to get his behaviour to improve. There were a lot of threads prior to Sept from 'been through it' parents who said that this was a time for reception children to start pushing boundaries and getting attitudes. Apparently it does calm down.... until they hit the juniors, then it starts again.

[donbean]

Thanks so much for the chat babyblue, its good to know that he isnt a delinquent

[mrsgboring]

No experience, as DS is two, but do you think it might help him to run off some steam before school? I'm guessing he's feeling too fidgety and energetic to concentrate - not helped by the horrid weather meaning he's too cooped up inside a lot at the moment.

Apparently, kids get muscle signals telling them to move around if they have to sit still too long. In your DS's case, maybe it's translated into being distracted and fed up with the idea of more sedentary activities at school.

How about a mini-trampoline or similar, to bounce on before setting out for school - or run around and jump in fresh air?